Federal agents in DC assaulted with sandwich, freedom fighter escapes

https://boingboing.net/2025/08/11/federal-agents-in-dc-assaulted-with-sandwich-freedom-fighter-escapes.html

489 points · 60 comments · view on lemmy.world

60 Comments

mitch@piefed.mitch.science · 100 pts · 1y (5 replies)

Godspeed, you hero of gyros, you hoagie heroine, you rigoletto of Ruebens...

RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world · 32 pts · 1y (2 replies)

A grinder goodie.

Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 34 pts · 1y (1 reply)

The Po' Boy Protestor

j_roby@slrpnk.net · 24 pts · 1y

An American Gyro

nkat2112@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 1y

My goodness, so poetic - I love it! And I fully agree with you.

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1y

Sammie Samaritan.

HellsBelle@sh.itjust.works · 69 pts · 1y (7 replies)
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 33 pts · 1y (2 replies)

The way they leapt at him the moment he threw it tells me that what he was saying and doing was actually getting to them.

We need more of this.

Also, I know I often laugh when I'm uncomfortable, so maybe that's it, but the camera man is about to find out that maybe having the Gestapo take over your city isn't actually funny.

burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 1y (1 reply)

The way they leapt at him the moment he threw it tells me that what he was saying and doing was actually getting to them.

I mean, I highly doubt it. They were paying keen attention to the fellow screaming and yelling within a chucked sandwich distance, and he then threw a sandwich at them. They'd probably been considering what they could get him on (besides white or rye) for the entire time he was yelling at them because anyone close and loud is likely the biggest 'threat' much more so than any of them having a brain at the point of them going in with any seriousness after being ordered into a city with a lower per capita crime rate than the white house.

prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 1y

Right, but like all of them took off after him lol

violetsoftness@piefed.blahaj.zone · 22 pts · 1y

this was beautiful thanks for sharing it

khannie@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 1y

Damn! He was close when he threw it. Solid work getting away.

Chivera@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 1y (1 reply)

That sub belongs in a museum

DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 2 pts · 1y

Oh, Spez is working on it

j_roby@slrpnk.net · 62 pts · 1y

DaddleDew@lemmy.world · 54 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Are those the dangerous gangmembers Trump was talking about?

RedPostItNote@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 1y

Don’t you know it’s worse than Baghdad!

mcbenavides85@piefed.social · 1 pts · 1y
[ removed ]
Formfiller@lemmy.world · 43 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Not all heroes wear capes

Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 1y

But he does have a wrapsheet that's a foot long.

ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de · 7 pts · 1y

Some just have hero sandwiches?

beatnixxx@fedia.io · 28 pts · 1y (3 replies)

a domestic terrorist using a sandwich of mass destruction. /s

FuckFascism@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y (1 reply)
[ removed ]
burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 1y

Just like taco bell, you should probably get your colon's health checked digitally if eating a random sandwich from a chain is giving you issues.

possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 1y

The murder weapon was composed of ham and cheese

Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip · 22 pts · 1y (12 replies)

The hero we need.

aegis_sum@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 1y (11 replies)

The gyro we need.

ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de · -3 pts · 1y (10 replies)

A large sandwich\sub is literally known as a "hero" sandwich. Why would you try to take that perfection away to go for "gyro" , that is neither pronounced the same, or is a similar sandwich?

FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y (4 replies)

You should know, Cole, that everyone loves a pedant.

PattyMcB@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 1y (3 replies)

Plus gyro DOES rhyme with hero

foggy@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Pure poetry.

Rivalarrival@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 1y

Pyrotry?

DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 1 pts · 1y

Gyro does, but gyro doesn't.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y

book 'im lou. one count of bein' a bear, one count of bein' accessory to bein' a bear

Sinthesis@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 1y

adjust nerd glasses technically speaking...the greek word gyro is pronounced "eeer-o" so its not that far off from "here-o"

sylvieslayer@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y (2 replies)

.......go google Greek Gyro, then go find your closest Greek restaurant and educate your taste buds. Tust. They will be happy.

ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Oh, don't get me wrong. I love eating them. But the guy threw a hero sandwich.

sylvieslayer@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y

Ah my bad! I misunderstood your comment

bizarroland@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 1y

That slow run was like ballet.

RaoulDook@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 1y (2 replies)

What's the charge? Delivering a footlong meal? A succulent foot-long meal?

LordCrom@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

It would be assault of a police officer and resisting arrest. Looks like that guy in pink was running in slow motion vs the special forces wanna be's wearing 50 lbs of armor and equipment.

Throwing sandwiches should become the new protest en masse.

chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 1y

I think it's just a play on succulent Chinese meal guy (he's dead now).

RymrgandsDaughter@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 1y

Nah he was a hero delivering justice

paraphrand@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 1y

Cops love sandwiches.

MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1y

Fucking fantastic!

mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca · 9 pts · 1y

what a hero

handoff food delivery for those fine fucks, whoops folks, in the gestapo

atzanteol@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 1y

"assault and resisting arrest".

maam@feddit.uk · 6 pts · 1y

Never mess with the heavy eating his sandwich

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
Jumi@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Did he get away?

GreenKnight23@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 1y

it's literally in the title. lol

otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 1y

So... I gotta know. Was it a hero's hero he launched?

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 1y (8 replies)

I keep trying to formulate a plan in my head:

On one hand ACAB: They all promote the national security culture within the law enforcement sector that we civilians are the enemy. The departments are all corrupt through and through

On the other hand the non ICE officers hate being used as Sπ‘–π‘β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿβ„Žπ‘’π‘–π‘‘π‘ π‘‘π‘–π‘’π‘›π‘ π‘‘ or Einsatzgruppen (German SD, or Death Squads, respectively) to pick on innocent civilians to be shuttled away to concentration camps. And I wonder if there was a way for the public to tell them we're sorry they are being abused by being repurposed as general goon squads, and if that might encourage them to resist more than they do.

Also, ICE agents, either pre-Trump used to sometimes engage in action that at least had the appearance of legitimacy, e.g. tracking people with violent records. New recruits (post OBBBA Budget) were told they'll be hunting the worst of the worst and then are picking up day laborers and ice-cream vendors, which is soul crushing for even MAGAs who wanted to be the hero.

We need to be able to take these sentiments and weaponize them against the system, and the policy-makers that are forcing them to be evil fucks for The Man.

I don't know the specifics, but there's a schematic in there somewhere.

otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 1y

Oh? They "hate" that, do they? Cite your references to that claim, please. Otherwise, your comment seems to stop at "ACAB" in its efficacy. 🀌🏼

CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y (6 replies)

ACAB? American cops are bad?

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 1y (5 replies)

All Cops Are Bastards, a sentiment that arises from the blue code of silence, so that even the well-meaning ones are obligated to lie in court to defend the violent ones, what allowed the loyalty-over-principle sector to rise into power, which is why there is such staunch resistance against publication of disciplinary hearings against police who misbehaved or broke laws, even though such documents are supposed to be public as per FOIA statutes.

When California passed a law reinforcing the notion that such files would be made accessible to the public, the precincts literally shredded or burned their files.

The institutions are corrupt through and through. It was especially evident during the Ferguson unrest, when the blue lines showed they had no trigger discipline for the military hardware they were wielding. It was laughable, except for the danger they were posing to the demonstrators.

Officers who seek to serve their communities quit. Some of them have publicly denounce police services and have become staunch police abolitionists. The only officers that remain are either violent killers, or the ones willing to cover for violent killers.

All cops are bastards.

CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y (4 replies)

The police in my province are nice and helpful whenever I talk to them.

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 1y (3 replies)

Your province is not in the US.

CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Yes, but when you say all cops, I assume globally. I am still from the Americas, just not from the US.

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 1y (1 reply)

There are problems with policing that are pretty universal, some of which are acknowledged in Peel's Principles of Policing way back with the Bow Street Runners. But while those principles are taught to every cadet, here in the states we otherwise ignore them.

There's absolutely problems with drift, away from participation of the community and toward control, and while I can't speak for which part of the Americas you're in (the RCM have enough annual incidents to fall neatly into the ACAB category) I can say there are problems with giving one group of people authority over the rest that we've yet to fully solve.

Still, it's especially bad in the states, and when black US tourists find themselves in conversation with law enforcement in Europe, the extreme level of contrition they sometimes show is an embarrassment to everyone, but a shame of the United States.

CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y

Like I said, not from the US.

GreenKnight23@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y