Favourite Zoidberg line?

334 points · 92 comments · view on lemmy.world

92 Comments

Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca · 88 pts · 303d

"By the way, I took the liberty of fertilizing your caviar"

SamuraiBeandog@lemmy.world · 73 pts · 303d (1 reply)

I regularly say "Hooray, I'm helping!" to my wife.

SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social · 16 pts · 303d

I scuttled away with my human claws up, screeching "whoop whoop whoop" whenever my wife wanted something I didn't like. I still wonder why she left me, Zoidberg!

dwemthy@lemmy.world · 69 pts · 303d (2 replies)

Once again, the conservative, sandwich-heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor!

_stranger_@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 303d

i came to post this one.

other_cat@piefed.zip · 2 pts · 298d

I'm ruined!

Czele@lemmy.world · 58 pts · 303d (5 replies)

The female Leela's problem is purely medical. Soon she will drop her eggs and they will hatch and all will be well

Trex202@lemmy.world · 72 pts · 303d (4 replies)

I love the running joke that he's a horrible human doctor

Zoidberg: There you are, good as new. Except for your dorsal fin, I'm afraid I couldn't find it after the crash.

Fry: Can I live without it?

Zoidberg: If you call that living.

Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca · 31 pts · 303d (1 reply)

"now open your mouth and let's have a look at that brain"


"I don't like the looks of this doctor. I bet I've lost more patients than he's cured."

sawdustprophet@midwest.social · 17 pts · 303d

"now open your mouth and let's have a look at that brain"

"No, not that mouth." "I only have one." "Really?"

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 303d

Young lady, I’m an expert on human physiology.

aarch0x40@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 303d

His doctorate is in art history.

Trex202@lemmy.world · 51 pts · 303d

Hermes: Come on, baby needs a new pair of shoes!

Dr. Zoidberg: The hell with your spoiled baby! I need those shoes.

KiwiTB@lemmy.world · 50 pts · 303d (3 replies)

Look at me, Dr Zoidberg, Home Owner!

Trex202@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 303d (2 replies)

Oh, that's where I left my cigar...

remon@ani.social · 13 pts · 303d

That just raises further questions!

AlexLost@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 303d

That just raises more questions?!

_stranger_@lemmy.world · 44 pts · 303d (1 reply)

Trex202@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 303d

Sweet guinea pig of Winnipeg!

HailReaper69@lemmy.zip · 43 pts · 303d (4 replies)

MimicJar@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 303d (2 replies)

Exactly! It may or may not be my favorite, but it is the one I constantly quote.

Trex202@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 303d (1 reply)

One of my favourite bits of trivia is that he never says this exact line, it's a misquote, but I know in my 4 hearts that he would say it

InevitableWaffles@midwest.social · 6 pts · 303d

Makes it like Star Trek with "Beam me up, Scotty."

neukenindekeuken@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 302d

Ironically, he's never said this throughout the show's run. The meme is attributed to him though, but it's never said in the show.

hellothere@sh.itjust.works · 42 pts · 303d

"I don't like the looks of this doctor. I bet I've lost more patients than he's treated."

I fucking love Zoidberg, he just gets me, yknow?

dual_sport_dork@lemmy.world · 39 pts · 303d

I use, "Enough of this, I'm going for a scuttle" all the time.

tetris11@feddit.uk · 33 pts · 303d

"You ALL still have Zoidberg!"

HeartyOfGlass@piefed.social · 30 pts · 303d (2 replies)

woop woop woop woop!

orbitz@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 303d (1 reply)

Crap just posted something about that one, missed it on my quick read. Mine too.

HeartyOfGlass@piefed.social · 4 pts · 302d

Always more room for woop woop woop woop!

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 303d (2 replies)

General: What is your purpose here?

[Zoidberg wakes up.]

Zoidberg: [drowsy] Alright, Officer, I'll move along.

Man: What the general means is why did you come to Earth?

Zoidberg: Not a day goes by I don't ask myself the same question.



Truman: If you come in peace, surrender or be destroyed. If you're here to make war, we surrender.

Zoidberg: Both good. The important thing is I'm meeting new people.



Zoidberg: Hooray!


Zoidberg: Take, I've got four of them.


Zoidberg: The president is gagging on my gas bladder. What an honor!

Blackfeathr@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 302d

Tbh Roswell that Ends Well was a goated episode from start to finish

meathorse@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 302d

Sawing

"Don't cut that, I need that to speak!"

Pauses... Saws faster

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 27 pts · 303d

Zoidberg: "I had garbage yesterday and it didn't cost me $300! I am not paying!"

erie09@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 303d

But still, to have your own pool!

AnarchoEngineer@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 26 pts · 302d

My first clue came at 4:15 when the clock stopped. The next clue came 3 hours later at 4:15 when I discovered the body of Amy’s dead deceased corpse

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 303d

hellfire103@lemmy.ca · 23 pts · 303d

"Hooray, I'm useful! I'm having a wonderful time!"

I relate to this on a spiritual level.

Awa@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 303d

The husband and I quote "one art please" and "your [something] is bad and your should feel bad"

48954246@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 302d

Your music's bad and you should feel bad!

chesshire@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 303d (1 reply)

"and I'm his friend, Jesus!"

nickiwest@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 302d

Agree. This is part of the shared lexicon in our home.

miked@piefed.social · 22 pts · 303d

Clamps - "Scuttle on home. This ain't none of your business, Slick."

Zoidberg - "My name isn't Slick. It's Zoidberg. JOHN [beep sound]-ING ZOIDBERG!"

The Silence of the Clamps

ScrollerBall@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 303d (4 replies)

Scalpel. Blood bucket. Priest. Next patient!

Trex202@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 303d (3 replies)

Geez, Zoidberg. Leave some for the enemy to kill.

loweffortname@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 303d (2 replies)

This isn't a war; it's a murder!

Trex202@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 303d (1 reply)

flips switch

This isn't a war; it's a moydah!

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 302d

aarch0x40@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 302d (1 reply)

Deviled egg!?

Taleya@aussie.zone · 15 pts · 302d

......The same devilled egg

carrylex@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 302d (2 replies)

There little friend, good as new

Devjavu@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 302d (1 reply)

Out of context that actually seemed pretty sad.

Trex202@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 302d

Comedy and tragedy

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 303d (2 replies)

“Is ‘desire to mate’ a feeling?”

“It’s all so complicated with the flowers and the romance and the LIES UPON LIES!”

Aeao@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 302d (1 reply)

I forgot that one. As true today as ever lol.

It’s extra funny because I’m asexual lol “is desire to mate a feeling you guys are having? Gross. Get your shit together” lol

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 302d

I suppose that makes Decapodians aro.

jpablo68@infosec.pub · 16 pts · 303d (4 replies)

Goose liver? Fish eggs? Feh! Where's the goose? Where's the fish?

aarch0x40@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 303d (3 replies)

That’s what rich people eat, the garbage parts of the food.

RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 303d (1 reply)

I had garbage for dinner yesterday!

aarch0x40@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 302d

Did it cost you $300?

SamuraiBeandog@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 303d

The gaahbij paahts.

W3dd1e@lemmy.zip · 15 pts · 302d

“Friends! Help! A guinea pig tricked me!”

ianfraserkrillmaster@midwest.social · 14 pts · 302d

Don't mind if i already did!

dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 302d (1 reply)

Examples of Zoidberg's astonishingly poor grasp of human anatomy make up my favorite punchlines in the series. Of course Farnsworth would hire the worst (and possibly cheapest) candidate: a doctor that has no idea how his patients are put together.

Open your mouth. No, your other mouth.

ozymandias117@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 302d

it's been a few years since medical school, so remind me... Disemboweling in your species... Fatal or non-fatal?

Taleya@aussie.zone · 12 pts · 302d

JOHN

FUCKING

ZOIDBERG!

hydrashok@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 303d (1 reply)

Someday they'll watch from down in the gutter, they will, as King Zoidberg caresses their fancy box.

deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz · 4 pts · 303d

The box says "no".

hayvan@feddit.nl · 12 pts · 302d (1 reply)

"Once again, the conservative, sandwich heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor!"

meathorse@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 302d

nom-nom-nom "I'm ruined!"

Zahille7@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 303d (2 replies)

A buffet! Oh, if only I had my wallet with me...

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 302d (1 reply)

Uhm… it's free.

Zahille7@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 302d

excited violent screeching and feeding noises

BlueZen@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 303d (1 reply)

Laughing at Hemes when they get paired up on Omicron Persei 8... "Screwed again my friend"

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 302d

ch00f@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 303d

"I've lost more patients than he's treated!"

samus12345@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 302d

The one he never actually said: "Why not Zoidberg?"

BobbyGasoline@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 302d (3 replies)

gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 302d (2 replies)

where was that? i don't remember it at all

Aeao@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 302d

My favorite zoidburg line I don’t think is ever actually said. It’s like the “frankly scarlet I don’t give a damn” of future

“Why not ZOIDBERG?”

I even engraved it on keychains for my friends. “Need a new keychain? Why not zoidberg”. I ran a leather shop for 15 years lol. I also made keychains that said “I fuck sheep” and put them on random keychains at parties.

dethedrus@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 5 pts · 302d

It's a trap, is why!

roz@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 302d

I'm not hearing a nooo

SneakyWeasel@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 302d

Let it ride!

sramder@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 303d (1 reply)

Clack!

resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 303d

^clack^

0ops@piefed.zip · 3 pts · 302d

MY MOTHER WAS A SAINT!!

Furbag@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 302d (1 reply)

"Alright, alright, let me have one of your young on a roll."

"We're out of rolls."

"Fine! Just give me something teeming with parasites!"

I think of this line whenever I order a hotdog in public lol

CorneliusTalmadge@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 302d

I’ll have a horse-coke.

Is horse-pepsi ok?

Nay!

orbitz@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 303d

Woop woop woop, well as close as I recall to my favourite line. Mean yes he has some actual good (better) lines too, but I always think of that one for that 'doctor', not as good as The Doctor but take what you can get in the show.

Eh_I@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 302d

That's normal.