Reminder that this is a stealth mission. You're gonna want a stealthier animal than a chicken. Imagine crawling through the dark in tense silence, only to to given away by a loud BKAWK. Not even a hobbit could sneak further than Moria with that condition.
Furthermore; The One Ring's greatest limitation is that it cannot just sprout legs and run off. Even beings of higher intelligence can be bent and manipulated to the ring's will (IE its ultimate goal of returning to Sauron). Putting the thing on an animal sounds like the best opportunity one could give an evil, tangentially sentient piece of jewelry the option to pilot the poor creature like a meat-mech directly into Sauron's clutches at the first opportunity.
As an aside: the ring could not be worn by said animal, it would needs be lashed to it. Imagine keeping track of a chicken which is now invisible to normal people, and also lit up like a beacon to the eye of Sauron and his otherwise day-blind ring wraiths. Bad idea.
Yeah, Boromir was tempted by the ring just by proximity. Nevermind, how a person plans to make a chicken cooperate with heading into a blasted hellscape and up a volcano.
If that's the "plan", the smarter version is to just drag it in a bag behind you.
Every day the ring is passed to the next person in the rotation, out in the open and acknowledged by all. The new bearer has to pledge, "I definitely will not be a punk-ass bitch and try to keep the ring, and I promise to suck everyone's cock if I do. "
they could have forged the ring into a chain. not like an necklace, like using the ring as a chain link, make I'm mithril, people might still be tempted to use it, but no one could wear it.
my guy, smeagol was living in a cave because of the ring... i don't think the ring connected to a chain link will change a thing, especailly if it's wearable lol.
This sounds like a clip from a LOTR × Ghostbusters crossover. They try using a trap but the One Ring upgrades the trap to catch almost any spirit or demon, including Balrogs, tempting the Ghostbusters to use it to capture Sauron, which, of course, is pure folly.
Now that you say it, I don’t remember the book ever really getting into what effects it might have on other races. All we know is it makes hobbits invisible, and that it had no effect whatsoever on Tom Bombadil. No one else got a chance to try it on if memory serves me correctly (the elves refused, the humans weren’t allowed, and the orcs never got near enough).
It’s been many years since I’ve read it however, so I’m happy to be corrected.
Sauron wore it in the great battle, and he was by all accounts visible, otherwise how could Isildor cut the finger off? That would be a very lucky swing if Sauron was invisible.
No, I think its power depends on the wearer. Frodo didn't want to be seen, so it made him invisible to everyone but Sauron, who understands its power.
The ring doesn't as much make you invisible as it transports you into the shadow realm. Sauron, however existed in both the real world and the shadow realm, so there was no transporting needing to happen there.
The ring's primary power is control over the other rings, and it seems like the shadow realm is part of how that works ("...and in the darkness bind them"). I'm guessing Frodo is overwhelmed by the power of the ring and is taken to the shadow realm, whereas Sauron has more control and can stay in the real world.
Other races may have different effects. The elves have some amount of magical ability, so maybe they can stay in the real world too. Maybe the dwarves would concoct some device to block part of the ring's power to stay in the real world. We don't know, the only examples we have are halflings and Sauron.
All three are half-lings, and all three wanted to hide the ring instead of use it to rule, so it makes sense it would have a similar impact on all three of them.
Yes, but without a control group we cannot really rule out whether this is race thing or a personality thing.
For instance, what effect would it have had on Boromir and Aragorn? How about Gimli? It's possible it would have made both of the former stronger, for instance, and made Gimli incredibly rich, because that's what their races desired. We don't really know, do we?
Yup, all we know is that there's some connection to the shadow world ("and in the darkness bind them") and other rings of power, we don't know the specific impact it would have on each individual or race.
Wearing the One Ring does make others invisible because one thing it does is take you into the unseen world (where the wraiths are visible and not just cloaked) and basically most people think you'd have to have the willpower and wear the ring for long enough to drag yourself back into being seen.
I've never read anything beyond the Hobbit, but I believe the Silmarillion goes in to more detail on how the ring would affect other races should they wear it. I particularly recall someone mentioning how the ring would affect gandalf, but again this is all secondhand knowledge.
The necklace obviously still had an impact on Frodo, so Sam had to carry him. The chicken takes the place of Frodo, so both Frodo and Sam can carry the chicken.
Well, then why not put that chicken on a cat, and the cat on a dog, and the dog on a donkey, and then ride all up into Mordor full Bremen Town Musicians style?
That’s a good question, but I don’t remember Bilbo having to strip naked after putting it on so he wouldn’t appear as a self-animated set of clothes floating around
Obviously it's invisible while inside the person, but what happens if they make a little turd? Does it become visible in mid air or does it work like the clothes?
What if they make a poo poo in the middle of a street while invisible, then walk away to a different town. What happens if the ring is then taken off?
For the answer to that question, you need to read Interview with Sméagol: The Secret Account of the True Ringbearer and All the Things Nasty Hobbitses should Never Ever Ask, unfortunately Frodo threw that into Mount Doom along with the ring because it contained knowledge no mortal man should ever possess.
So there you are, an orc in mordor, on guard duty while sauron makes the rest of the army. It's pretty great being on guard duty, nobody bothers you and you've just caught a rabbit that you're now roasting on a small fire.
In the horizon a weird dude with a beard and a grey cape appears, he has several smaller humanoids with him ... and a trebuchet.
The trebuchet is launched and a small dude is flung above you. The projectile/dude is manically trying to open the box that he's apparently wearing as a hat?!?
You turn the rabbit, and when you look up again the guy has opened the box... Where did he go? You follow his path, and suddenly, next to the entrance to some random cave, you notice what could be the result of a small dude, with a metal box for a hat, hitting the side of the mountain. The sound hits your ears 2 seconds later. It's like both a thud, a clang, and a squish all at once.
Even at this distance you can see something in the mess. Something shiny that you for some reason just know isn't part of the box. You set off for the impact site.
What do you do now? If you want to investigate goto page 56 and if you want to alert the chain of command go to page 182.
77 Comments
henfredemars@infosec.pub · 106 pts · 287d
You underestimate the murderous-ness of chickens.
TachyonTele@piefed.social · 50 pts · 287d
Chickens are no joke. Theyre assholes too.
crank0271@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 287d
They're also tasty. I'm sure if it came down to it even a vegan wouldn't have many qualms about eating a supremely evil (but still tasty) chicken.
stray@pawb.social · 20 pts · 287d
When you really think about it, dragons are just wealth-hoarding chickens.
AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 287d
"Give us half of your hoard or we'll slay your feathered cousin!"
sqgl@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 287d
Chickens are closely related to avian dinosaurs.
leftzero@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 11 pts · 287d
They know, in the depths of their evil little bird brains, that they are dinosaurs.
And what dino (deinos) stands for.
LiveLM@lemmy.zip · 97 pts · 287d
Something a little like this:
skuzz@discuss.tchncs.de · 8 pts · 287d
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 12 pts · 287d
I miss the class conscious cuckoos
LiveLM@lemmy.zip · 8 pts · 286d
If you attack the village chickens multiple times, this event triggers where many more spawn in and attack you. It's a thing in many Zelda games
skuzz@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 286d
VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works · 78 pts · 287d
JustTheWind@lemmy.world · 43 pts · 287d
Reminder that this is a stealth mission. You're gonna want a stealthier animal than a chicken. Imagine crawling through the dark in tense silence, only to to given away by a loud BKAWK. Not even a hobbit could sneak further than Moria with that condition.
Furthermore; The One Ring's greatest limitation is that it cannot just sprout legs and run off. Even beings of higher intelligence can be bent and manipulated to the ring's will (IE its ultimate goal of returning to Sauron). Putting the thing on an animal sounds like the best opportunity one could give an evil, tangentially sentient piece of jewelry the option to pilot the poor creature like a meat-mech directly into Sauron's clutches at the first opportunity.
As an aside: the ring could not be worn by said animal, it would needs be lashed to it. Imagine keeping track of a chicken which is now invisible to normal people, and also lit up like a beacon to the eye of Sauron and his otherwise day-blind ring wraiths. Bad idea.
Formfiller@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 286d
Lol for sure I know one of mine has a loud ass egg song. A rooster would be funny too because. They never shut the fuck up
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · 34 pts · 287d
how could it work?
whoever carries the chicken will be tempted by the ring and will likely kill the chicken in a fit of weakness
qarbone@lemmy.world · 39 pts · 287d
Yeah, Boromir was tempted by the ring just by proximity. Nevermind, how a person plans to make a chicken cooperate with heading into a blasted hellscape and up a volcano.
If that's the "plan", the smarter version is to just drag it in a bag behind you.
propaganja@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 287d
Every day the ring is passed to the next person in the rotation, out in the open and acknowledged by all. The new bearer has to pledge, "I definitely will not be a punk-ass bitch and try to keep the ring, and I promise to suck everyone's cock if I do. "
BigBenis@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 287d
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · -4 pts · 287d
they could have forged the ring into a chain. not like an necklace, like using the ring as a chain link, make I'm mithril, people might still be tempted to use it, but no one could wear it.
Habahnow@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 287d
my guy, smeagol was living in a cave because of the ring... i don't think the ring connected to a chain link will change a thing, especailly if it's wearable lol.
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 287d
no, but it would help a bit
illi@piefed.social · 7 pts · 287d
Didn't the ring adjust the size so the bearer could wear it though?
then_three_more@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 287d
I'm imagining a Hula hoop size so it'll go around your waste now
Alaik@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 287d
It did and also being near it corrupted you also.
dditty@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 9 pts · 287d
You're saying everyone would've been tempted by Frodo's cock?
tuff_wizard@aussie.zone · 3 pts · 286d
The look Sam gave him at the end of the trilogy had me wondering
Formfiller@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 287d
I have a hen that’s pretty bossy but for god sakes don’t give it to a rooster. A rooster would be king of Mordor in a hot second.
awful_neutral@mander.xyz · 21 pts · 286d
Someone has never owned chickens. They are capable of unspeakable acts
baltakatei@sopuli.xyz · 17 pts · 287d
This sounds like a clip from a LOTR × Ghostbusters crossover. They try using a trap but the One Ring upgrades the trap to catch almost any spirit or demon, including Balrogs, tempting the Ghostbusters to use it to capture Sauron, which, of course, is pure folly.
AeonFelis@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 286d
Someone never played Zelda and it shows.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 286d
Maybe they played it, but never repeatedly attacked cuckoos.
AeonFelis@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 286d
Did they really play it then?
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 286d
That's way too deep for a weekend...
Tigeroovy@lemmy.ca · 14 pts · 286d
They’d have eaten the chicken pretty fast.
Honytawk@lemmy.zip · 11 pts · 286d
First day, second breakfast
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 13 pts · 287d
Well, first of all, the ring makes you invisible
offspec@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 287d
I thought it just exaggerated whatever traits your race naturally has. Hobbits are sneaky -> hobbitses go invisible
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 7 pts · 287d
Now that you say it, I don’t remember the book ever really getting into what effects it might have on other races. All we know is it makes hobbits invisible, and that it had no effect whatsoever on Tom Bombadil. No one else got a chance to try it on if memory serves me correctly (the elves refused, the humans weren’t allowed, and the orcs never got near enough).
It’s been many years since I’ve read it however, so I’m happy to be corrected.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 287d
Sauron wore it in the great battle, and he was by all accounts visible, otherwise how could Isildor cut the finger off? That would be a very lucky swing if Sauron was invisible.
No, I think its power depends on the wearer. Frodo didn't want to be seen, so it made him invisible to everyone but Sauron, who understands its power.
Omgpwnies@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 287d
The ring doesn't as much make you invisible as it transports you into the shadow realm. Sauron, however existed in both the real world and the shadow realm, so there was no transporting needing to happen there.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 287d
The ring's primary power is control over the other rings, and it seems like the shadow realm is part of how that works ("...and in the darkness bind them"). I'm guessing Frodo is overwhelmed by the power of the ring and is taken to the shadow realm, whereas Sauron has more control and can stay in the real world.
Other races may have different effects. The elves have some amount of magical ability, so maybe they can stay in the real world too. Maybe the dwarves would concoct some device to block part of the ring's power to stay in the real world. We don't know, the only examples we have are halflings and Sauron.
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 287d
It had the same effect on Bilbo and Gollum, though. The idea of its effects being dependent on race cannot be ruled out just yet.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 287d
All three are half-lings, and all three wanted to hide the ring instead of use it to rule, so it makes sense it would have a similar impact on all three of them.
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 287d
Yes, but without a control group we cannot really rule out whether this is race thing or a personality thing.
For instance, what effect would it have had on Boromir and Aragorn? How about Gimli? It's possible it would have made both of the former stronger, for instance, and made Gimli incredibly rich, because that's what their races desired. We don't really know, do we?
tuff_wizard@aussie.zone · 3 pts · 286d
You can imagine the shame when gimli put it on and became an elf
Honytawk@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 286d
The ring worked on the Dark Lord differently, so it definitely might be race bound
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 286d
Yup, all we know is that there's some connection to the shadow world ("and in the darkness bind them") and other rings of power, we don't know the specific impact it would have on each individual or race.
PapaStevesy@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 286d
Hobbits don't desire invisibility, they're just good at not being noticed.
RedAggroBest@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 287d
Wearing the One Ring does make others invisible because one thing it does is take you into the unseen world (where the wraiths are visible and not just cloaked) and basically most people think you'd have to have the willpower and wear the ring for long enough to drag yourself back into being seen.
offspec@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 287d
I've never read anything beyond the Hobbit, but I believe the Silmarillion goes in to more detail on how the ring would affect other races should they wear it. I particularly recall someone mentioning how the ring would affect gandalf, but again this is all secondhand knowledge.
XTL@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 287d
I have read Silmarillion and don't remember there being much about the ring. But that may be just that I don't remember. There's a lot of it.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 287d
Why let the chicken wear it? Frodo wore the ring on a necklace most of the time, why not do the same with the chicken?
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 287d
Well, that's just wearing it on a necklace with extra steps.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 287d
The necklace obviously still had an impact on Frodo, so Sam had to carry him. The chicken takes the place of Frodo, so both Frodo and Sam can carry the chicken.
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 7 pts · 287d
Well, then why not put that chicken on a cat, and the cat on a dog, and the dog on a donkey, and then ride all up into Mordor full Bremen Town Musicians style?
Better safe than sorry...
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 287d
That would be sick.
Saryn@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 287d
They're gonna have a good story to tell Gandalf about how they lost the ring while orcs are marching them to mount doom.
falseWhite@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 287d
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 12 pts · 287d
That’s a good question, but I don’t remember Bilbo having to strip naked after putting it on so he wouldn’t appear as a self-animated set of clothes floating around
bstix@feddit.dk · 4 pts · 286d
Is the ring holders poop also invisible?
Obviously it's invisible while inside the person, but what happens if they make a little turd? Does it become visible in mid air or does it work like the clothes?
What if they make a poo poo in the middle of a street while invisible, then walk away to a different town. What happens if the ring is then taken off?
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 286d
For the answer to that question, you need to read Interview with Sméagol: The Secret Account of the True Ringbearer and All the Things Nasty Hobbitses should Never Ever Ask, unfortunately Frodo threw that into Mount Doom along with the ring because it contained knowledge no mortal man should ever possess.
Aeri@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 286d
It is my understanding that what the ring actually does is give you power related to your greatest desire.
What this would be for a chicken is unknown to me
MacNCheezus@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 286d
What if its desire was to be so big that it can pick humans as if they were grains?
Sounds pretty dangerous, I can understand why they didn’t want to risk it.
MadMadBunny@lemmy.ca · 12 pts · 287d
Do it Canadian style, with a Cobra Chicken.
There wouldn’t be anything else alive after that for sure.
Hikermick@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 286d
One fowl to rule them all
starchylemming@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 287d
why dont they render the ring unusable by putting it on a larger metal ring
put the larger ring on gollum as a fancy bdsm slave collar and throw the whole happy and docile sub gollum off an eagle into mount doom
edit: how to put the ring over gollums head? idk weld it together once he wears it
luciferofastora@feddit.org · 14 pts · 287d
Onligatory "why not use the eagles" debate incoming
starchylemming@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 287d
if eagles are out for lore reasons, a trebuchet with gollum payload works too
BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works · 16 pts · 287d
So there you are, an orc in mordor, on guard duty while sauron makes the rest of the army. It's pretty great being on guard duty, nobody bothers you and you've just caught a rabbit that you're now roasting on a small fire.
In the horizon a weird dude with a beard and a grey cape appears, he has several smaller humanoids with him ... and a trebuchet.
The trebuchet is launched and a small dude is flung above you. The projectile/dude is manically trying to open the box that he's apparently wearing as a hat?!?
You turn the rabbit, and when you look up again the guy has opened the box... Where did he go? You follow his path, and suddenly, next to the entrance to some random cave, you notice what could be the result of a small dude, with a metal box for a hat, hitting the side of the mountain. The sound hits your ears 2 seconds later. It's like both a thud, a clang, and a squish all at once.
Even at this distance you can see something in the mess. Something shiny that you for some reason just know isn't part of the box. You set off for the impact site.
What do you do now? If you want to investigate goto page 56 and if you want to alert the chain of command go to page 182.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 287d
I thought this was settled. In the immortal words of JRR Tokin:
This is my book motherfucker! They'll walk if I tell them to! Get that weak-ass bird shit out of here!
krooklochurm@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 286d
It's been tried. Where do you think nazgǔl come from?
MattW03@lemmy.ca · 7 pts · 285d
Fools. When they will learn.
krooklochurm@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 285d
That's incredible
MattW03@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 285d
👌
SereneSadie@lemmy.myserv.one · 5 pts · 287d
Kite-Man: Hell Yeah. The Anti-Life Equation infects a chicken, and it proceeds to murder a lot of people.
It finds a way.
SpaceCowboy@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 286d
Why else did they have four hobbits in the fellowship?
You need a few spare mules in case you gotta put the first one down.
nuko147@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 287d
Sam would make an excellent chicken sandwich with this Lembas bread.
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 287d
Then the Chicken becomes an unwitting spy, and easy to steal from.
aeharding@lt.harding.dev · 1 pts · 287d