In Colombia we have this tradition of making "old guy" dolls that are burn on new years eve with messages from all the things we want to left behind. When my cousin changed his name, we named the old guy with his dead name and burned it.
Mind your local laws regarding burning things out in the open. But i think it would be super cool if people started adopting this.
I don't know how similar the tradition is to the colombian one, but in ecuador the doll is called the "old year". It's stuffed with old newspaper and sawdust, clothed in old, unusable pants and shirt and wears a papier-mâché mask of whatever you want. It's common to put a mask of a politician
My (white American) family has something similar, but probably has a common origin:
On Jan 1, we will have a fire. Fireplace, fire pit, even a candle. We then write our regrets on paper and burn them. It's private, and you don't have to share what you are burning, but you can.
When someone I know changed her name, her parents decided that they would use a new name but it wouldn't be the one that she wanted, it would be similar. So my friend called their mum Carol, instead of Caroline, and the problem quickly solved itself.
Modern problems require modern solutions. I feel like I should do this with faux brainwashed idiots every time they want to spout off one of their sheeple talking points
I'm a cis gay dude with a trans sister. Your brother is a jerk. I wasn't perfect when my sister came out to me, but I put in the modest amount of effort to reframe my internal concept of her to reflect her true self. I did so because she is important to me and I want her in my life.
Narcissists are all about their appearances to others. The same people that abuse and overpower in private do everything to seem like the nicest people in the world to others. They can just "oops I forgot" to the deadnaming, but taking away the airhorn by force in front of the rest of the family would show the animal inside that they make their entire lives about hiding.
Not everyone is completely chicken shit at all times. I'm not going to say every cool story people tell happened, but not everyone's as much a coward as you.
Oh, so you should let them hold abusing your sibling over your head for money? You shouldn't stand up for the weak if the powerful might not reward you for it?
You are why the world is on fire. Millions of boot fellating cowards like you.
Love that, I do the same. If you want to spread a bit of cheer though, I also tag good behaviour or people that sound like they could use cheering up so I can remember to say something nice next time I see them.
If they were that much inclined then they shouldn't have deadnamed/misgendered in the first place, even after being told so many times.
If they were gonna disown for that, then they'd have done that either way anyways. Might as well get some nice improvement by removing that deadnaming and misgendering.
Lmao, as if they will leave you anything. It’s not rare for parents to decide to blow all of their money on travel around the world and leave their kids with nothing. Their generation is proud of pushing their problems onto their kids and leaving nothing behind.
My grandparents left behind an entire farm full of (sometimes literal) shit. Thankfully, you can pay companies to take the non-relevant crap away. Unfortunately, you'll still have to sort it yourself.
Hmm, if only there was a name for the type of situation that occurs between people where one side is tolerating abuse purely for monetary compensation. Also, potential - not guaranteed. They could be broke AF at the end because of the amazing healthcare system.
But sure, tolerate the abuse, transphobia, misgendering, deadnaming, and what not - because they are your parents and you may get some coins for it. Yeah, no.
If your (birth)parents/family/friends are that shit - you don't need them. There's a whole community that'll welcome you as you
85 Comments
driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br · 148 pts · 293d
In Colombia we have this tradition of making "old guy" dolls that are burn on new years eve with messages from all the things we want to left behind. When my cousin changed his name, we named the old guy with his dead name and burned it.
festnt@sh.itjust.works · 30 pts · 293d
damn, that's sick
Eladriagon@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 18 pts · 293d
I’m totally doing this when I come out with a name change. Freakin epic. 🤘
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 18 pts · 293d
Is it cultural appropriation if I steal this?
Because I'm definitely stealing this.
Bysmuth@lemmy.zip · 16 pts · 293d
Mind your local laws regarding burning things out in the open. But i think it would be super cool if people started adopting this. I don't know how similar the tradition is to the colombian one, but in ecuador the doll is called the "old year". It's stuffed with old newspaper and sawdust, clothed in old, unusable pants and shirt and wears a papier-mâché mask of whatever you want. It's common to put a mask of a politician
driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br · 5 pts · 293d
Same, but we don't usually involve politics.
korazail@lemmy.myserv.one · 7 pts · 292d
I think it's been adapted enough to be safe.
My (white American) family has something similar, but probably has a common origin:
On Jan 1, we will have a fire. Fireplace, fire pit, even a candle. We then write our regrets on paper and burn them. It's private, and you don't have to share what you are burning, but you can.
We've been doing this since I was a child.
Bysmuth@lemmy.zip · 11 pts · 293d
Cool, i didn't know this tradition was also done outside of ecuador. Do you also burn it out on the street and jump over it?
driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br · 7 pts · 293d
Don't remember the jump over part. It's funny talking with people of Equador, it's like eeey we do the same thing here! Everytime.
BunScientist@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 292d
We burn el viejo in Mexico too :) no jumping, it used to have fireworks inside
als@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 135 pts · 293d
When someone I know changed her name, her parents decided that they would use a new name but it wouldn't be the one that she wanted, it would be similar. So my friend called their mum Carol, instead of Caroline, and the problem quickly solved itself.
implosive_sprig@beehaw.org · 18 pts · 293d
In some families, this would lead to a cold war where they just keep using the wrong names for each other until death.
Future generations grow up thinking those are their actual names because it's what they've always called each other.
cybervseas@lemmy.world · 98 pts · 293d
Rulesgiving
Formfiller@lemmy.world · 45 pts · 293d
Modern problems require modern solutions. I feel like I should do this with faux brainwashed idiots every time they want to spout off one of their sheeple talking points
nanoswarm9k@lemmus.org · 11 pts · 293d
Can we get grant money for a study group and control group here?
FatVegan@leminal.space · 0 pts · 292d
Is the modern solution to lie on social media?
inkzombie@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 35 pts · 293d
lol when I asked my gay brother to put effort into my name and pronouns he cried and said I was emotionally manipulating him
TipRing@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 292d
I'm a cis gay dude with a trans sister. Your brother is a jerk. I wasn't perfect when my sister came out to me, but I put in the modest amount of effort to reframe my internal concept of her to reflect her true self. I did so because she is important to me and I want her in my life.
Midnitte@beehaw.org · 12 pts · 293d
Ah yes, the Leslie Jones method
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 4 pts · 293d
I do have some questions about who hired her because I think she yelled at 4 out of 6 people at that table?
aprazeth@feddit.nl · 2 pts · 293d
Leslie Jones providing an equal and fair treatment to all, regardless of whom hired her - I'm down with that.
Saapas@piefed.zip · 9 pts · 293d
If it was due to malice and not forgetfulness, why didn't they just confiscate the air horn?
Taleya@aussie.zone · 10 pts · 293d
Because it's not something they can "oops!"
name_NULL111653@pawb.social · 1 pts · 287d
Narcissists are all about their appearances to others. The same people that abuse and overpower in private do everything to seem like the nicest people in the world to others. They can just "oops I forgot" to the deadnaming, but taking away the airhorn by force in front of the rest of the family would show the animal inside that they make their entire lives about hiding.
Mastengwe@sh.itjust.works · 0 pts · 292d
Because it never happened. As good as it would be that it did- these types of memes are just for the feel-goods.
chunes@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 292d
And then everybody clapped
Noja@sopuli.xyz · 16 pts · 292d
You are joking that this didn't happen, but I wanted to do the exact same thing when my parents were screaming at each other
mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 292d
yeah but you didn't, though, did you
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 291d
Not everyone is completely chicken shit at all times. I'm not going to say every cool story people tell happened, but not everyone's as much a coward as you.
mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 291d
wrong reply btw
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 291d
Your mom is the wrong reply!
I'm not sure how that happened. I didnt know replies could breed, or that the result would be geese.
mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 290d
well, half goose. on my mother's side.
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 291d
Not everyone's as much of a coward as you. Some are! But not all of us!
Endymion_Mallorn@kbin.melroy.org · -265 pts · 293d
What you're training them to do is disown and disinherit you both. At least, that's the outcome I'd expect.
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 224 pts · 293d
Oh, so you should let them hold abusing your sibling over your head for money? You shouldn't stand up for the weak if the powerful might not reward you for it?
You are why the world is on fire. Millions of boot fellating cowards like you.
gusgalarnyk@lemmy.world · 78 pts · 293d
I do have this person (Endymion) tagged as "Anti-immigrant" just as an PSA.
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 56 pts · 293d
I feel like that comment is a good enough explanation of how thoroughly repulsive they are.
gusgalarnyk@lemmy.world · 40 pts · 293d
Fair enough, I just like to establish a pattern of bad behavior and Lemmy provides the tools for me to passively track assholes so I share when I can.
trashcroissant@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 12 pts · 293d
Love that, I do the same. If you want to spread a bit of cheer though, I also tag good behaviour or people that sound like they could use cheering up so I can remember to say something nice next time I see them.
LadyButterfly@piefed.blahaj.zone · 8 pts · 293d
That's a really nice thing to do! I hope your day is joyful
curbstickle@anarchist.nexus · 26 pts · 293d
Thats the word I chose to tag them with!
Leavingoldhabits@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 293d
Tagging sounds useful, do you know if its supported in voyager?
idiomaddict@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 293d
It is, go to the user profile and under the three dots, you should see “edit tag.”
Please don’t tag me as technologically aware though, that would be dreadfully misleading.
Leavingoldhabits@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 293d
Thanks! Found it, had to enable user tags in settings aswell.
curbstickle@anarchist.nexus · 8 pts · 293d
Instead of going to the profile, long press on their name and it will associate with the comment you tag them on.
This way you've got a direct comment reference for your tag.
Edit: on voyager, yes.
festnt@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 293d
i was reading down this thread and wanted to know, does jerboa have tags too?
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 7 pts · 293d
I chose 'boot licker(cultural)'
baines@lemmy.cafe · 59 pts · 293d
it’s the boomer way
ashenone@lemmy.ml · 135 pts · 293d
Imagine being a coward cause you might not get mommy and daddy's money when they die
vzqq@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 105 pts · 293d
Also, imagine not loving your child enough to respect them as a full independent person.
birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 73 pts · 293d
If they were that much inclined then they shouldn't have deadnamed/misgendered in the first place, even after being told so many times.
If they were gonna disown for that, then they'd have done that either way anyways. Might as well get some nice improvement by removing that deadnaming and misgendering.
Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca · 67 pts · 293d
If they're willing to go that far, they're not parents worth having. Good riddance.
dangling_cat@piefed.blahaj.zone · 49 pts · 293d
Lmao, as if they will leave you anything. It’s not rare for parents to decide to blow all of their money on travel around the world and leave their kids with nothing. Their generation is proud of pushing their problems onto their kids and leaving nothing behind.
ramble81@lemmy.zip · 47 pts · 293d
You say that like it’s a bad thing.
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 40 pts · 293d
“This whole hutch and all the china in it can be yours!”
I have no idea what to do with the endless reams of stuff my parents will leave behind. I want to be disinherited.
Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 293d
My grandparents left behind an entire farm full of (sometimes literal) shit. Thankfully, you can pay companies to take the non-relevant crap away. Unfortunately, you'll still have to sort it yourself.
Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 293d
It’s called a rental dumpster.
tanisnikana@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 293d
And my brother will have to order one.
MutilationWave@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 292d
Yep, filled a full flatbed sized one, had it hauled off, and filled another one 2/3 when my mom died.
vzqq@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 39 pts · 293d
Oh no! Anyway…
dickalan@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 293d
Bootlicker conservatives are we??
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 291d
Fascists, dear. They're called fascists. Conservatives are called liberals now.
Catoblepas@piefed.blahaj.zone · 16 pts · 293d
Why should you fear maybe not getting money some time in the future over what years of misgendering does to your sibling?
CileTheSane@lemmy.ca · 15 pts · 293d
Don't threaten me with a good time.
aprazeth@feddit.nl · 12 pts · 293d
Hmm, if only there was a name for the type of situation that occurs between people where one side is tolerating abuse purely for monetary compensation. Also, potential - not guaranteed. They could be broke AF at the end because of the amazing healthcare system.
But sure, tolerate the abuse, transphobia, misgendering, deadnaming, and what not - because they are your parents and you may get some coins for it. Yeah, no.
If your (birth)parents/family/friends are that shit - you don't need them. There's a whole community that'll welcome you as you
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 291d
Not necessarily, but you're still better off without dead toxic weight. Need to lose it more, even.
regdog@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 293d
lmao, this is "Edward macaroni forks" level of downvotes.
festnt@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 293d
no clue what that means, but yeah
regdog@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 292d
That comment "Edward macaroni forks" is the most down voted comment in the history if imgur.com. You could probably find it with a simple web search.
LumiNocta@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 293d
Well it's the outcome you'd deserve.
PopcornPrincess@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 292d
Shit, I’ve never seen this many downvotes on a Lemmy comment. Here, have another 😂
Endymion_Mallorn@kbin.melroy.org · -1 pts · 292d
Thank you, I guess?
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 291d
I'm just imagining the 'married with children' episode parodying 'it's a wonderful life'
No particular reason.
Endymion_Mallorn@kbin.melroy.org · 1 pts · 290d
RIP Sam Kinison.
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 290d
Great episode. Dunno why you made me think of it.
Endymion_Mallorn@kbin.melroy.org · 1 pts · 290d
Not sure, exactly. But I do plan to rewatch it over the holidays.
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 290d
I'm sure, I bet you find it pretty relatable.
Mastengwe@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 292d
Is it the outcome you’d expect, or the outcome you’d enact, if you were to find yourself on the receiving end of a much needed correction?
cassandrafatigue@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 291d
I think we both know the answer here.