This is an update to this post.
This weekend, Amazon is premiering its $40 million Melania Trump documentary. It's pretty clearly a bribe to the Trump family.
We're going to disrupt the big premiere weekend by messing up Melania's Amazon search results. Specifically, we're going to amplify the paranormal erotic thriller novel Melania: Devourer of Men so it's high in the results. Maybe #1!
The book is perfect: It's absurd, the cover is ridiculous, and it's free, so we're not giving Amazon any money. (Fun fact: It's free because of YOU, the users of A Boring Dystopia. After your comments on the last post I reached out to the author, and they agreed to make the book free this weekend.)
Currently, the book ranks #29 in Amazon search results for Melania. But all the other Melania results seem pretty weak (lol), so we can pull this off pretty easily. We just need people to:
- "Buy" the book (it's free)
- Share this post and get other people to "buy" the book.
That's it.
Here's a link to the book, in case your Lemmy client stripped out the links above: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07HN9XC1H
Please share and we can celebrate as an erotic novel about a bat monster Melania Trump becomes a higher and higher search result on Amazon!
79 Comments
TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world · 119 pts · 196d
I can positively recommend some other bedside reading from the same author:
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 47 pts · 196d
wait is she a couch animorph
that's not even a good couch thats an ikea special
corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca · 37 pts · 196d
Look at this guy getting all snobby about the couches he fucks; like he's better than the rest of us :-D
regedit@lemmy.zip · 10 pts · 195d
Fuck, you made me wake my wife with that one!
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 10 pts · 196d
It's Melania's magic power - but will it be enough to get her husband back from Peter Thiel's claws?
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 196d
she's no stickley. she's not even a lazy boy. i'm with betteridge on this one.
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 19 pts · 196d
I bought it because i appreciate the gesture of making his melania fanfic free for this stunt lol
My Amazon recommendations will never be the same again
socsa@piefed.social · 64 pts · 196d
mulcahey@lemmy.world · 28 pts · 196d
lol this is a GREAT idea!
bajabound@lemmy.world · 49 pts · 196d
I got my copy, but this also looks like a great option.
FalschgeldFurkan@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 195d
Stupid sexy free speech
Broadfern@lemmy.world · 41 pts · 196d
I now own a digital copy of this book.
IamtheMorgz@lemmy.world · 37 pts · 196d
They already stopped people from buying it, I guess.
devdoggy@lemmy.world · 43 pts · 196d
This is not true. I just bought the book.
tamal3@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 195d
I also did just now. The big yellow button said "Buy it for free" hah!
AquaTofana@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 195d
Me too, for free still as of this comment!
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 196d
maybe you need to make a Very Private... uh... Nurchase.
criticon@lemmy.ca · 15 pts · 196d
You can't get Kindle books on the Amazon app, you need to go thru a browser or the Kindle app
IntrovertTurtle@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 195d
I totally just did it through the Amazon app though 🤔
dditty@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 195d
criticon@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 195d
Do you have Android or iPhone? AFAIR the issue started because Google wanted to collect 30% of the sales
Edit: I wonder if free books don't have this issue, I got this book from the browser
ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca · 11 pts · 196d
If you're on your phone/in the app it may stop you from buying it without the Kindle app.
mulcahey@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 196d
I'm hearing mixed things. Do you have a Kindle? It might not show up unless you've set one up. Maybe that's it?
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 13 pts · 196d
I don't have a kindle and just bought it!
E: It says Kindle for Web for me, is that a thing that can be activated manually? it's been ages since i used amazon
Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 195d
There's a Kindle app for phones, too.
someguy3@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 196d
Kinda looks like her, published 2018, so it's her huh. *Lol description is nuts and yes her.
regedit@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 195d
This comment was a roller coaster!
danc4498@lemmy.world · 32 pts · 196d
I am going to do this, but I assume Amazon has a way of pushing its promoted content to the top.
someguy3@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 196d
Lol
HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 9 pts · 196d
What a niche
Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de · 27 pts · 196d
If I were an Amazon exec I'd hope for this. The bribe has already done its work and if no one sees they film there will be fewer complaints and bad reviews written about it.
mulcahey@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 196d
Kinda think "The #2 Amazon result is an erotic novel where she's a bat monster" is probably not a good look
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 196d
it's a better look than "$75 million movie sells 3 tickets" so like, pushing the book might be doing more harm than good
0_o7@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 195d
The president is a rapist. It hasn't been a bad look for half of the country.
But go ahead, give amazon your emails and data like they don't already manipulate rankings.
I hope you feel you accomplished something.
regedit@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 195d
Hol up, erotic novel? Bat monster? I'm in for 10!
ickplant@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 196d
As the mod of the bat community, I heartily approve of this effort. Long live erotic bat monsters!
SarahValentine@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 20 pts · 196d
Melania film? You mean the Melania porn film? The Melania porn film I just made up? That Melania porn film? Sorry but I can't really discuss the nonexistent Melania porn film at this time.
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 23 pts · 196d
Melania was doing lesbian porn in 1996. Stormy Daniels was a stripper in 1996 and started doing porn six years later.
We have every reason to believe that there is a Stormy Daniels/Melania Trump movie out there somewhere.
SarahValentine@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 196d
God dammit I can't even make up wild enough lies to miss the insane truth.
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 2 pts · 195d
After the 2016 election, the NY Times assembled a panel of TV creators. 'The West Wing,' 'House of Cards', 'Scandal,' and other political dramas were represented.
All the creators said the same thing; if they'd had a fictional candidate say the things Donald Trump had said in real life, every advertiser and network executive would demand that the character be shown as hated by all Americans, and lose the election in a landslide.
lovely_reader@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 196d
This is a fun idea, but unfortunately Amazon's search results are pay to play. (That's why they're always so bad.)
adb@jlai.lu · 6 pts · 195d
Thanks for reminding this. However, considering the small investment, still worth it even if might not be able to reach 1st place anyhow.
Lucelu2@lemmy.zip · 17 pts · 196d
Melania is the worst first lady we ever had in the US. She is at base, the most uninteresting person. She is supposed to be on "the Five" tomorrow. I hope they ask her uncomfortable questions but I bet it will mostly be softball bullshit questions. She sucks and is unintelligent, just greedy and an Epstein operative/prop, as it is how she met the Orange Asshole. I hope she remains stuck with him because those who marry for money should be required to earn it.
tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip · 14 pts · 195d
She's not the worst. I'll take a boring grifter over Nancy fucking Reagan puppeting her mushbrained husband to ignore the AIDS crisis.
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 15 pts · 196d
I'm doing my part!
Formfiller@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 195d
RagingRobot@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 196d
I'm sure like 2 people were planning to watch it
smeenz@lemmy.nz · 11 pts · 196d
One of them was Tim Cook
paraphrand@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 196d
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 196d
you're on the right order of magnitude
ExplosiveLynx@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 196d
That's impressively bad.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 196d
I just had an epiphany. i was on a team that made a film my senior year of high school. it was a little high school short. i mean, scott ran a good crew it was high quality for high school short but it was still a 30 minute high school short. i ran the camera and my forearm also played The Lunch Lady (uncredited). We sold it to HBO. I don't know our viewing statistics or how much it sold for (this was our buddy Scott's dream, we were just along for the ride and to help him get there), we won a handful of film festivals and scott no joke got an award at Sundance but there were about 400 people at our premiere. I can now say I no joke beat the Melania movie and that gives me a little hit of dopamine, maybe a big one let's see how this goes.
every kid on youtube is a more successful creator if they've earned back enough money to pay for their webcams omg.
village604@adultswim.fan · 7 pts · 196d
I'm sure most of his base will rub one out to it.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 196d
is there a oooooo i just saw forbidden loveseat
is there a chuck tingle we could boost too?
edit: excuse me Two time Hugo Finalist and Goodreads nominee Dr. Chuck Tingle.
if you are Mssr. Boehninger, this is the best strategy to sell books i tell you hwhat
Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 13 pts · 196d
It's up to 11th place as of the writing of this comment.
waterSticksToMyBalls@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 196d
"Melania d" gives zero search suggestions so it seems like they've already quashed this
Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 196d
What has that fluff every done other than spit out crotch fruit for a monster?
Maeve@kbin.earth · 11 pts · 196d
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/melania-furious-over-shooting-upstaging-documentary-trump-biographer/ar-AA1Va8bX
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 196d
did the one person who bought a ticket go home and read the news instead?
Maeve@kbin.earth · 8 pts · 196d
I saw that. Melania has to choose. No one can serve two masters, you will love one and hate the other.
myfunnyaccountname@lemmy.zip · 11 pts · 195d
The maga cucks will spin this into a good thing. “Look how much people love her, they are writing stories about her.”
Hello_there@fedia.io · 10 pts · 196d
For search rankings, you would have to Google it and then click on the right link
Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io · 10 pts · 196d
Yay! That was fun. More like this, please.
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 196d
Purchased, thanks!
FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 196d
LOVE getting new books. Thanks.
thagoat@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 9 pts · 196d
Purchased
Surp@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 195d
Don't buy it don't download it. Give it zero time.
HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 7 pts · 196d
Got both LOL
Lumisal@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 196d
That she's a manananggal makes it even funnier 🤣🤣🤣
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 4 pts · 196d
what is a manamanagal?
dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 196d
You can't afford it.
Lumisal@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 195d
It's a folk monster from the Philippines. A person who at night splits their torso in half in search of people to eat (or was it the one that eats fetuses from pregnant women?).
You kill it by burning the lower half before the upper half can return to it.
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 1 pts · 195d
cool, thanks! funnily enough a single game on steam features this monster - i just had to look if its featured somewhere - and it released this january... but it looks pretty bad
ChunkMcHorkle@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 196d
I've been thinking that ever since I saw her sitting next to her obviously stroke-afflicted husband at that failed Army extravaganza on his birthday, looking like she was just waiting to snatch his soul. There's even a mention of her in the Wikipedia page:
It's definitely a look that suits them both, lol.
Seaguy05@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 196d
Purchased
merdaverse@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 195d
Don't forget to 5 star it! This author's stuff is brilliant: Forbidden Loveseat: A JD Vance & Usha Novel
bestbry@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 195d
I can see it but can’t buy in Brazil :(
Peruvian_Skies@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 195d
Likewise.
Tollana1234567@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 196d
it was money laundering pure and simple.
bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 195d
Jumi@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 195d
Getting an Amazon account?
No, thank you
hodgepodgin@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 196d
Flames5123@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 196d
Amazon Prime Video and Amazon the online store are two separate apps. This will have no impact unless it’s googled, and we push the book to the top. But simply searching “melania movie” will filter out the book.
We’re also way too small of a community (the fediverse at large even) to even push that kind of thing to impact any SEO.