Manatees are struggling with climate change along the florida coast line where waters in the summer have been measured to up to 100 degree F in the ocean. It has devastated manatee floral diet. And they are dying off from it.
Do not torment the gentle wildlife that you are killing off.
I once saw a park ranger just screaming at a group of guys and threatening them with $5000 fines just for getting near one.
I told a friend of mine who surfs, and he didn't realize they were so protected. He said there's an old girl who comes to visit them when they surf, and she rolls over on her back so they can scritch her belly. I told him it was a $5000 fine, and he was bummed. He liked scritching his manatee friend.
In the criminal justice system, harassment of marine mammals is considered a Florida-tier offense. In Miami-Dade, the detectives who investigate these bizarre aquatic crimes are members of an elite squad known as the Meth-Adjacent Intervention Unit. These are their stories.
Musk is responsible for this. Remember a few weeks ago when he made Grok put everyone in bikinis? Of course, Florida is now copying it IRL. And as usual, it's the poor bloody matinee ... mantit ... blobbly wobblies that suffer!
No it's not. I mean, maybe if you're dumb and can't recognize fake shit, which, from the looks of this comment thread, it appears Lemmy has started down that path.
It's the "in a bikini" part that's a dead giveaway. That's not a detail that would be included in a real headline. That's extra added to make the situation seem more ridiculous and silly. It's crazy I even have to point this out, its painfully obvious to me.
Tbf, we live in the Clickbait Era of journalism, so that's not your best argument. It's definitely fake, but the poorly written headline is no longer good proof, it's actually the standard even for articles written by real people.
69 Comments
mech@feddit.org · 202 pts · 193d
I've never even seen a manatee in a bikini.
ickplant@lemmy.world · 53 pts · 193d
Glad I’m not the only one with that thought.
tkk13909@sopuli.xyz · 25 pts · 193d
Sounds sexy
ickplant@lemmy.world · 114 pts · 193d
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world · 40 pts · 193d
Is she single? Asking for a friend.
the_mighty_kracken@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 193d
Her name is Barbara.
mech@feddit.org · 3 pts · 193d
I swear to god if this is AI...
OddMinus1@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 192d
sigh ...would.
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 9 pts · 193d
Because people like her keep wrestling them off.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 193d
mermaids and their songs are confusing
Carjacklavinder@reddthat.com · 2 pts · 188d
Beat me to the punch. Next time, Gadget! Next time!
TheBat@lemmy.world · 85 pts · 193d
itkovian@lemmy.world · 44 pts · 193d
I can't, but I totally would date her just to wrestle with her. As a bonus, I am as fat as a manatee.
Mac@mander.xyz · 4 pts · 192d
I don't want to wrestle her but I'd like to get to know her and learn what makes her her. She sounds interesting.
socsa@piefed.social · 19 pts · 193d
There is nothing to fix. But maybe she could fix me.
gigastasio@sh.itjust.works · 74 pts · 193d
Krelis_@sh.itjust.works · 55 pts · 193d
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 193d
TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com · 54 pts · 193d
Manatees are struggling with climate change along the florida coast line where waters in the summer have been measured to up to 100 degree F in the ocean. It has devastated manatee floral diet. And they are dying off from it.
Do not torment the gentle wildlife that you are killing off.
homes@piefed.world · 42 pts · 193d
In Florida, is an extremely serious crime to even touch a manatee.
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 16 pts · 193d
I once saw a park ranger just screaming at a group of guys and threatening them with $5000 fines just for getting near one.
I told a friend of mine who surfs, and he didn't realize they were so protected. He said there's an old girl who comes to visit them when they surf, and she rolls over on her back so they can scritch her belly. I told him it was a $5000 fine, and he was bummed. He liked scritching his manatee friend.
hanrahan@piefed.social · 6 pts · 193d
Destroy their entire ecosystem is a ok though :(
NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone · 3 pts · 193d
Is that like a holdover Jim Crow thing?
Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club · 38 pts · 193d
The other perpetrator:
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 34 pts · 193d
Listen, I get it, Manatees have no business wearing a bikini.
D_C@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 192d
You take that back! Leave them damn sexy manatees alone.
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 7 pts · 192d
You've been at sea too long, sailor.
D_C@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 192d
Nope!! Say that's a nice cockle you've got there, can I touch it?...
Ok, you may be correct!
caboose2006@lemmy.world · 31 pts · 192d
Who was in the bikini?
Karjalan@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 192d
Yes
DancingBear@midwest.social · 2 pts · 192d
Grimy@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 193d
In the criminal justice system, harassment of marine mammals is considered a Florida-tier offense. In Miami-Dade, the detectives who investigate these bizarre aquatic crimes are members of an elite squad known as the Meth-Adjacent Intervention Unit. These are their stories.
massive_bereavement@fedia.io · 18 pts · 193d
Dun-dun.
Akagigahara@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 193d
You mean the Meth-Induced Abnormal Mannerism Investigators?
SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 5 pts · 192d
Smoke meth in the city where the heat is on
Fight manatees on the beach 'til the break of dawn
Welcome to Miami
Bienvenidos a Miami
fox2263@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 192d
Why was the manatee in a park and why was it wearing a bikini. Lastly, was it a licensed wrestling match or unsanctioned?
baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de · 3 pts · 192d
wrestling licenses are a scam perpetuated by Big Wrestling! go out and wrestle someone today! nobody can stop you!
Otakulad@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 193d
She just wanted her bikini back after the manatee stole it.
sundray@lemmus.org · 16 pts · 193d
Florida Man(atee).
homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 193d
*golf clap*
Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 193d
Is that the new STD spreading out from Mar-a-lago?
altphoto@lemmy.today · 16 pts · 193d
Her hips don't lie! That's shakira! You guys arrested shakira while she was doing her wrestling routine!
You might have noticed she's not blonde.
altphoto@lemmy.today · 16 pts · 193d
Confirmed! You guys got shakira while she was having personal arguments with her favorite animal kingdom friend.
Just leave them alone. Its all about past manatee songs that never made it.
HeyJoe@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 192d
Actor studying for Zootopia 3.
Taleya@aussie.zone · 13 pts · 192d
Manatees can't wear bikinis, their nipples are in entirely the wrong place
Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 192d
Not with that attitude.
PhoenixDog@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 192d
You just cracked into an obviously under-represented market. You could make millions.
Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 11 pts · 192d
One is left wandering what a manatee in a bikini was doing in a public park...
redbrick@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 193d
I feel there's more to this story we're missing here. ..but damn, I'd wrestle her any day...
SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 192d
I just looked, it's fake. I still stand by my song.
aeronmelon@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 193d
What’s the crime?
Retail4068@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 193d
Fighting an endangered animal? Swimming in probably boat lanes.
Come on guys.
Earthman_Jim@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 193d
I see you know your judo well!
Earthman_Jim@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 193d
LEAVE IT ALONE! FIGHT ME INSTEAD!
Goes prone
daggermoon@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 193d
choke me mommy
Bahnd@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 192d
Well... Who won?
Agent641@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 192d
Oh no here comes the manatee from the top rope with a steel chair! Oof! As god as my witness she is broken in half!
TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 192d
I'm going to have to see the video
I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 192d
brucethemoose@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 192d
In The Pale Moonlight ages like fine wine.
gmtom@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 192d
Picture is AI
finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 192d
Musk is responsible for this. Remember a few weeks ago when he made Grok put everyone in bikinis? Of course, Florida is now copying it IRL. And as usual, it's the poor bloody matinee ... mantit ... blobbly wobblies that suffer!
doingthestuff@lemy.lol · 4 pts · 192d
Is this on pay per view?
stupidcasey@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 193d
I've never seen a manatee in a parrk, if I did I would also wrestle it in a bikini.
Blackmist@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 192d
Just let me get my manatee costume...
PhoenixDog@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 192d
I'll get my manatee shaped robe and wizard hat.
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 193d
mEEGal@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 193d
This is AI slop
edit: to people who downvote me because she's cute : Just look at the logo
and then search online for "WFor 4 News", it doen't exist
PapaStevesy@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 192d
Well, it kiiiinda exists, but yeah, fake logo, headline, and picture for sure.
pickman_model@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 192d
Dunno. When it comes to Florida folks, sometimes it is hard to tell AI slop from reality.
I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 192d
No it's not. I mean, maybe if you're dumb and can't recognize fake shit, which, from the looks of this comment thread, it appears Lemmy has started down that path.
It's the "in a bikini" part that's a dead giveaway. That's not a detail that would be included in a real headline. That's extra added to make the situation seem more ridiculous and silly. It's crazy I even have to point this out, its painfully obvious to me.
PapaStevesy@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 192d
Tbf, we live in the Clickbait Era of journalism, so that's not your best argument. It's definitely fake, but the poorly written headline is no longer good proof, it's actually the standard even for articles written by real people.
pickman_model@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 192d
Right on. We also have the Florida journalsim.
mEEGal@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 192d