Hold every billionaire ransom for the rest of their lives under threat of being summoned to the bench unless they divest themselves of their wealth to my satisfaction.
The prompt says explicitly that you have to sit on it. You can only do that once (and realistically, zero times).
The bench implies but doesn't guarantee to summon the people. Given it works on future/past people also, you're probably chatting with their spirit or something.
Wait. Hear me out. The power to summon someone, hold them for an hour and force them to be conscious is really significant. Sure, there's nothing I could say to have any immediate effect. I'd just mention that he should divest his wealth to the poor or else when my hour is up, someone else is going to summon him. It'll keep happening until he's no longer the wealthiest person. Then, keep going down the list.
Oof yeah that's rough. Mine was years ago in my early 20s. She never got to see my sister become an adult, or to meet my wife, or to see me blossom into a somewhat healthy and responsible adult. Mourning is rough, but you get through it, it feels like nothing will be ok again, but you find a new ok.
Different take; my grandparents were terrible when they were alive. At this point, I'd choose my wife. An hour laughing and joking with my wife with no other responsibilities sounds awesome.
Yeah, I think this one's a winner assuming they retain the information after the conversation you could convince your younger self to make different choices and to put you into a different place.
Sure, you may no longer exist after the conversation, but the version of you that would exist afterwards might be less sad.
Honestly, I can't decide. Masashi Kishimoto is definitely up there, but so is Homer. You know, the one who wrote The Odyssey. I'll make a list of my top 10 for your convenience.
::: spoiler leest
Can't decide who should be at the top
JK Rowling
Masashi Kishimoto
Homer
Alexander Hamilton
Lin Manuel Miranda
Jorge Rivera-Herrans
Shaun Tan
Julius Caesar because I have some questions for him
:::
45 Comments
_stranger_@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 170d
Drop the bench in the Marianas trench.
Hold every billionaire ransom for the rest of their lives under threat of being summoned to the bench unless they divest themselves of their wealth to my satisfaction.
ChonkyLincoln@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 169d
You. I like you.
stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 169d
I enjoy your presence.
draco_aeneus@mander.xyz · 3 pts · 169d
Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 170d
Elon Musk.
Wait. Hear me out. The power to summon someone, hold them for an hour and force them to be conscious is really significant. Sure, there's nothing I could say to have any immediate effect. I'd just mention that he should divest his wealth to the poor or else when my hour is up, someone else is going to summon him. It'll keep happening until he's no longer the wealthiest person. Then, keep going down the list.
NihilsineNefas@slrpnk.net · 14 pts · 170d
I mean, you'd have the opportunity to do something far funnier, and then you can spend the extra 50 minutes decorating your work.
Diddlydee@feddit.uk · 8 pts · 170d
Just any dead grandfather? Not too fussy?
Mickey7@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 170d
Good question. Yeah the grandfather of a guy at work
thisbenzingring@lemmy.today · 8 pts · 170d
grandparents for sure 💔
Technus@lemmy.zip · 7 pts · 170d
My dad tells these stories about how my great grandpa used to joke and pull pranks on the family. I wish I could have met him in person.
That or getting an hour to pick Alan Turing's brain. He'd probably hate the current generation of "AI" as much as I do.
Mickey7@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 170d
For me it's about having a conversation with someone who lived history rather than just reading about it.
Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk · 6 pts · 170d
My best friend. Been gone over a decade now.
GreenBeanMachine@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 169d
GalacticGrapefruit@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 169d
I'd want to chat with someone from the future. I want to know if we'll make it. If we'll be alright.
Agent641@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 168d
"Rat meat has so much protein in the future. Expensive though."
modus@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 169d
Their current absence in your life should answer that question for you.
tetris11@feddit.uk · 1 pts · 168d
Or OP is just isn't that interesting enough to talk to
Railcar8095@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 168d
Time travel is real, they are just ghosting OP
hakunawazo@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 168d
One hour on that bench? Couldn't it be a bit more comfy?
surewhynotlem@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 170d
I also choose this guy's dead grandfather.
Inspiration: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5c79n0/comment/d9uf56l/?context=1
ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org · 4 pts · 169d
FTFY: https://old.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5c79n0/comment/d9uf56l/?context=1
Old Reddit has no login requirement for NSFW
DudeImMacGyver@kbin.earth · 4 pts · 170d
I would talk to Mickey7's dead grandpa
Mickey7@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 169d
I'm sure he would love to have a discussion with you
DudeImMacGyver@kbin.earth · 3 pts · 169d
You made him sound like someone worth taking to, I figure why not?
itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 170d
My grandfather or grandmother, I can't decide. Ben Franklin. Carl Sagan.
Diddlydee@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 170d
Your grandfather and grandmother are Ben Franklin and Carl Sagan? That's remarkable in innumerable ways if true.
trslim@pawb.social · 3 pts · 169d
Honestly, i might be childish or something, but Markiplier. He just seems like a chill guy, and I would wanna ask him a bunch of questions.
Philote@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 170d
Mr Rogers. In my mind one of Americas greatest offerings to the world. Just a genuinely amazing person.
Bruncvik@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 169d
Keanu Reeves. Just the two of us, each on one end of the bench, enjoying a sandwich, and not talking but still content with each other's company.
tetris11@feddit.uk · 1 pts · 168d
You could make it if you try
captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 169d
It'd be nice to catch up with my mom
brewbart@feddit.org · 1 pts · 169d
Same. Two weeks ago, very suddenly and far too early. Just started retirement.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 168d
Oof yeah that's rough. Mine was years ago in my early 20s. She never got to see my sister become an adult, or to meet my wife, or to see me blossom into a somewhat healthy and responsible adult. Mourning is rough, but you get through it, it feels like nothing will be ok again, but you find a new ok.
Llllllllllll@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 170d
Different take; my grandparents were terrible when they were alive. At this point, I'd choose my wife. An hour laughing and joking with my wife with no other responsibilities sounds awesome.
stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 169d
Is she still with us, or do you just not get very much time together because of work and other things? (Sorry for the personal question)
Llllllllllll@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 169d
Still very much with us; just incredibly busy
stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 169d
Oh, good!
Tigeroovy@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 169d
I guess my dad so I can ask him about all the shit he didn’t write down before he died like his passwords to shit or whatever.
borokov@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 169d
Myself. I'm very curious to see how I look from the outside.
tetris11@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 168d
"oh shit, not this guy again. Listen, I'm busy"
Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 170d
Me
Triumph@fedia.io · 3 pts · 170d
Specifically, 14 year old me.
bizarroland@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 170d
Yeah, I think this one's a winner assuming they retain the information after the conversation you could convince your younger self to make different choices and to put you into a different place.
Sure, you may no longer exist after the conversation, but the version of you that would exist afterwards might be less sad.
Bitflip@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 170d
past.Â
stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 169d
Honestly, I can't decide. Masashi Kishimoto is definitely up there, but so is Homer. You know, the one who wrote The Odyssey. I'll make a list of my top 10 for your convenience.
::: spoiler leest
Can't decide who should be at the top
JK Rowling
Masashi Kishimoto
Homer
Alexander Hamilton
Lin Manuel Miranda
Jorge Rivera-Herrans
Shaun Tan
Julius Caesar because I have some questions for him :::
So ye, that's basically it.
zebidiah@lemmy.ca · 0 pts · 169d
..... Could I spend the hour beating this theoretical individual to death instead of chatting?
I have a few ideas of who is like to see on that bench....