Your username is how you die, how bad is it?

57 points · 176 comments · view on lemmy.world

176 Comments

SoftBun@lemmy.ml · 27 pts · 3y

comfy@lemmy.ml · 15 pts · 3y (1 reply)

:)

PlutoniumAcid@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 3y

Hnoooobody expects the Spanish inquisition!!

cosmicsploogedrizzle@lemmy.ml · 13 pts · 3y

Oh god

raccoon@lemmy.ml · 12 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Oh shit.

tubbadu@lemmy.one · 1 pts · 3y

We all know how they are going to kill you... or better, where

ryuko@lemmy.ml · 11 pts · 3y

Considering the anime she's from, probably violently with one half of a large scissor.

ChewbaccasClitoris@lemmy.one · 11 pts · 3y

I die with a smile on my face

original_ish_name@lemmy.ml · 11 pts · 3y (1 reply)

I get shot by richard stallman

7eter@feddit.de · 1 pts · 3y

ah damn - shouldn't have swapped those two letters

Icarus@lemmy.ml · 10 pts · 3y (1 reply)

uh oh

argv_minus_one@beehaw.org · 2 pts · 3y

🔥🥵

gravitywell@lemmy.ml · 9 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Spagettigification🫠

YourFavouriteNPC@feddit.de · 7 pts · 3y

Sounds like a long, painful way to go

Rimjob_Bob@beehaw.org · 9 pts · 3y (1 reply)

There's worse ways to go I guess

YourFavouriteNPC@feddit.de · 4 pts · 3y

Depends... Are you going to die from giving or from receiving one? Or in other words: who's bob?

YourFavouriteNPC@feddit.de · 8 pts · 3y

Not at all! People are gonna be pissed at the devs and they'll patch my death scene right out of the game, or at least make it optional. I'm immortal, baby!

DestroyMegacorps@lemmy.ml · 8 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Died fighting for freedom of technology and the destruction of corporations

Solaris1789@lemmy.ml · 7 pts · 3y

I get assasinated by oracle for not owning a Solaris license and my death is ruled out as a suicide. Alternatively i get thrown into the sun somehow

SpiderShoeCult@sopuli.xyz · 7 pts · 3y (2 replies)

killed in a crusade (shoe-ade?) started by a cult of spiders that have a shoe as their holy symbol, in order to liberate the promised shoe (due to the sheer scale, the item doubles as both symbol and holy land)

could be worse, I guess

PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 3y (1 reply)

SpiderShoeCult@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 3y

this is awesome

fork@beehaw.org · 7 pts · 3y (1 reply)

If I must die to a fork, it'd be funny if it was this one.

tubbadu@lemmy.one · 1 pts · 3y

or perhaps stabbed by a table fork?

RagingNerdoholic@lemmy.ml · 7 pts · 3y

Heart attack from yelling at my computer screen, I guess

ebike_enjoyer@beehaw.org · 7 pts · 3y

Hit by a car. Which, statistically, is probably a solid guess

Helix@feddit.de · 6 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Corrupted DNA, so most likely either cancer or radiation. The latter being not the greatest way to go...

Jumuta@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

Five Pebbles

Pepp3r@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 3y

I think it would actually be pretty long and painful :(

theory@sopuli.xyz · 6 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Not too bad, im alive in practice

nLuLukna@lemmy.one · 2 pts · 3y

Maybe you move into a quantum state of being both in theory and practice at the same time

SmokeInFog@midwest.social · 6 pts · 3y

Shit, I'm choking and I can't see... what direction am I going?

304@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 3y (3 replies)

I honestly have no idea, which opens up a whole world of possibilities!

Blacklight@lemmy.ml · 7 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Death by 304 minor injuries?

304@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

Aw man, that sounds excruciating.

FUsername@feddit.de · 4 pts · 3y

I could offer to you: HTTP Status 304: Not modified

Guess it would be easier to die from modification, though.

Null@pawb.social · 6 pts · 3y

Into the void I go

TheElectroness@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 3y

It's shocking.

Bicyclejohn@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y

Some wanker on a bike

Zagaroth@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y

Um, I get isekai'd into a dragon god with mirror-twin kitsune goddess as his wives? So pretty damn good, though my actual wife might object a touch.

My username is an old D&D PC of mine who has evolved greatly over the decades and is currently the pantheon head in a campaign/book setting. Not sure how else to match what the name means to the idea of the thread title.

CannotSleep420@lemmygrad.ml · 5 pts · 3y

I die of sleep deprivation while smoking a lot of weed. In other words, a normal day for me.

moonleay@feddit.de · 5 pts · 3y

I like the view; Though the pressure will end me

dirtmayor@beehaw.org · 5 pts · 3y

at least there's dirt

Che_Donkey@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y

Brayed to death by an Argentinian descendant of the African Wild Ass.

no bueno.

spinoza_the_jedi@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y

I guess that might mean lightsabers are real. You’re welcome, everyone.

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y

A. I'm okay with it B. I'm not okay with it. C. I haven't a clue what it means. D. Maybe it means suicide, if so, I guess that is the choice I made?

jax@lemmy.cloudhub.social · 5 pts · 3y (8 replies)

My name is just my name… idk what that means 😥

HenryWong327@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Same, I guess I have to fight an evil clone of myself or something.

jax@lemmy.cloudhub.social · 1 pts · 3y

To be fair, it does seem like there’s at least 326 others, maybe more, so that doesn’t seem unlikely

GoldenDoge@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y (3 replies)

suicide? or you die to a clone of yourself? idk

jax@lemmy.cloudhub.social · 5 pts · 3y (2 replies)

::: spoiler CW - suicide Lol I mean, the first one wouldn’t even surprise me 😓 :::

Helix@feddit.de · 3 pts · 3y (1 reply)

If you're suicidal, keep in mind there always will be a tomorrow and no suffering is endless. Life has ups and downs and even in the worst downs, you can usually manage to find happiness after a while. I hope you have at least an OK day.

jax@lemmy.cloudhub.social · 2 pts · 3y

Oh, for sure! I’m fine now but it was a thing like years ago. Didn’t mean to concern anyone, sorry

Thank you 😊

argv_minus_one@beehaw.org · 3 pts · 3y

There's a Mortal Kombat character with the same name, so…you lose a mirror match. Fatality.

ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 3y

This

overkill0485@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y

A bit excessive, don't you think?

argv_minus_one@beehaw.org · 5 pts · 3y

My existence triggers undefined behavior in the laws of physics, causing the universe to glitch for a moment and then collapse entirely. Everyone alive at the time is trapped for eternity, unable to move or do anything, and sees nothing but some cryptic words suspended in an endless black void:

Segmentation fault (core dumped)
cavemeat@beehaw.org · 5 pts · 3y

Oh god oh fuck

CheshireSnake@lemmy.one · 5 pts · 3y

I'm still confused if it's going to be bad or trippy.

PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y

Oh shit, over 1000 years of pure suffering.

EponymousBosh@beehaw.org · 4 pts · 3y

I...I don't even know how this would work.

Nyaa@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 3y (2 replies)

I think I'm okay with it

pushka@beehaw.org · 4 pts · 3y

Death by snoo snoo

Moonguide@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

bonk

peeonyou@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y

pretty bad

Satiric_Weasel@beehaw.org · 4 pts · 3y

I'm imagining the chest-burster scene from alien, but a it's a Weasel dressed as a caricature of an early 20th century monopolist.

TheOPtimal@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y

hey, it's going to be quick :)

Bombastic@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y

In a bombastic manner

onlooker@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y (2 replies)

Hard to say. I guess I don't die?

butter@lemmy.jamestrey.com · 6 pts · 3y (1 reply)

You're the guy who's crushed by a building while Godzilla fights something else

onlooker@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

Haha, I'll take it!

dontcarebear@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y
[ removed ]
Wolpertinger@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y

My username is the German version of a jackalope, so I guess I'm going out monty python style.

lvxferre@beehaw.org · 4 pts · 3y

Death by a specially illiterate Lucifer, I guess?

Context for my username: it's the result of my 15yo edgy self trying to say "lightbringer" in Latin, without knowing how Latin compounds work. ("Lucifer" is fully regular, by the way.) Eventually however I stuck with the username across multiple sites, and it's still going strong two decades later.

sneezycat@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 3y

I'm allergic... it's going to be unpleasant.

this@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 3y

Yes

Guy_Fieris_Hair@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 3y

Confusing

BearclawHammerfist@beehaw.org · 4 pts · 3y

It's either going to hurt really bad or it's going to happen so quickly I won't know what happened.

mrcleansocks@beehaw.org · 4 pts · 3y

I do love clean socks....

simply_surprise@lemmygrad.ml · 3 pts · 3y

I'm gonna guess it doesn't move the plot forward

XPost3000@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

Death goes viral, probably

DidacticDumbass@lemmy.one · 3 pts · 3y

I died the way I lived, incompetently.

fishy_2_0@beehaw.org · 3 pts · 3y (1 reply)

im not sure do i get eaten by fish or do i drown in a pile of fish?

argv_minus_one@beehaw.org · 2 pts · 3y

You get eaten by that big jumping fish in Super Mario Bros 3.

CooperRedArmyDog@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

If a dog who is an enlisted member of the Red Army of the USSR takes me out 1) what was I doing, 2) I probably deserved it at that point and 3) this means the USSR has been reformed

Barring a few obvious questions I think this outcome is a net positive fpr the world

Carcel@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y (2 replies)

Either in a Latin American jail or immolated by a French lamp. Burning to death would not be pleasant.

LoreleiSankTheShip@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Cârcel means muscle cramp in Romanian, so that's another inconvenient way you might go

Carcel@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Sounds about right.

waver002@lemmy.one · 3 pts · 3y

Well at least there's somebody there when I die.

RecaffeinatedDecaf@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 3y

Heart attack. It's probably heart attack.

Moonguide@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

Either i got lost on the moon and I'd be very bad at my job, or there's local fauna that hunted us down.

Packopus@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

Classy

charred@beehaw.org · 3 pts · 3y

pretty warm and crispy

Crocrodile@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 3y (2 replies)

Very bad

pingveno@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Pingveno is Esperanto for penguin. I guess I get cuted to death.

Crocrodile@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 3y

Hahaha

InfiniWheel@lemmy.one · 3 pts · 3y

Killed by an Ophanim or a weirdly designed car

black_flag_astronaut@beehaw.org · 3 pts · 3y

It's not bad, it's friggin awesome!

ram@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

Someone's gonna ram me to death? OwO

gun@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

...

Redacted@beehaw.org · 3 pts · 3y

I'm guessing pretty bad...

dumpling@pawb.social · 3 pts · 3y
[ removed ]
CaptainAlchemy@lemmy.one · 3 pts · 3y

Dying being an alchemist is like dying because you forgot to look both ways before crossing the street, in other words, I was a bad alchemist...

baal@feddit.de · 3 pts · 3y

Always knew I was destined for hell.

scrchngwsl@lemmy.org.uk · 3 pts · 3y

Probably the sound I'll make when I die?

such_lettuce7970@beehaw.org · 3 pts · 3y

It'll be wilted and slimey. Ewww (honestly I just stuck with my old reddit name, which was randomly generated, because I suck at naming).

whiskeypickle@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

I died as I lived

creek@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

Looks like I am drowning...

OhSnapKracklePopped@beehaw.org · 3 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Not too fun, I’d imagine.

bobs_guns@lemmygrad.ml · 1 pts · 3y

you would be deep fried, presumably

skeletorsass@lemmygrad.ml · 3 pts · 3y

A lot of sass in the best case.

PlutoniumAcid@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 3y

Quickly, I hope.

PorkrollPosadist@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Following this man to the gates of hell.

Portrait of J. Posadas

bobs_guns@lemmygrad.ml · 2 pts · 3y

there's more than one gun so it will probably be quick at least

catsan@feddit.de · 2 pts · 3y

Cute but full of shit

smartwater0897@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Mine is randomly generated but I guess it would work. :)

ZenFriedRice@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

This is the best way I could've every gone.

asexualchangeling@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y (1 reply)
[ removed ]
Guy_Fieris_Hair@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 3y

Death by snusnu!

Wumbologist@lemmy.one · 2 pts · 3y
[ removed ]
meisme@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Be yourself I guess

possum@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

I guess I die in a violent possum attack. Or do i?

Haunting_Tale_5150@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y
[ removed ]
packetloss@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Lots of jittering and buffering before finally timing out.

Yabai@beehaw.org · 2 pts · 3y

It's terrible

Disgusted_Tadpole@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Interesting.

ShoePaste@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

sticky and horrid

jnovinger@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

I died who I am

merjalane@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 3y (1 reply)

Dying at the hand of Meryan person ("merjalane" = "Meryan person" in Estonian) sounds intriguing, considering that Merya people have been extinct for centuries

Barbarian@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Absolutely enraging.

Lets_taco_bout_it@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Delicious

nodiet@feddit.de · 2 pts · 3y (1 reply)

I guess I'll become morbidly obese and die of a heart attack

bobs_guns@lemmygrad.ml · 1 pts · 3y

either that or starvation

Majora@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 3y

Either I get crushed by a big moon with an angry face or smothered by labia

KnightOfOldEmpire@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

A nickname for a character from a book I want to write... the MC doesn't and lives on in the aftermath of a fallen empire. What's left is just a petty squabbling of those who survived, who came from the foreign lands and the dammed whose machinations are yet to be fulfilled.

(Think of an Andromeda show but leaning more into fantasy than sci fi)

sgtnasty@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y (1 reply)

not so sure...

shreddy_scientist@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 3y

It'll be nasty, that's for sure, hope it's at least quick too. Quick and nasty isn't soo bad, right?

ratz@chatsubo.hiteklolife.net · 1 pts · 3y

Yeah, nightmare fuel I guess

darkstar@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

Not entirely sure how it would work honestly

heavyboots@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

I mean… 😬

waspentalive@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

I live a long time and small parts of me go on forever.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conway%27s_Game_of_Life (look for R-Pentamino)

LoreleiSankTheShip@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

I'm honestly fine with mine. There are worse ways to go.

lunchboxhero@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y
[ removed ]
icky_mess@lemmy.org.uk · 1 pts · 3y

Accurate, I suspect.

ElmarsonTheThird@feddit.de · 1 pts · 3y

Third son of a viking probably going to take me down.

Ted_Bunny@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

Adorrible

ahamrick@lemmy.hamrick.xyz · 1 pts · 3y

Pretty peacefully, I'd say.

0x0815@feddit.de · 1 pts · 3y

I‘m just the average normal guy

Argentum_Rex@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

I'd think like Midas Touch but in silver

BurnedDonutHole@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

BurnedDonutHole related something will kill me it seems.

tubbadu@lemmy.one · 1 pts · 3y (1 reply)

my username means nothing at all, it this bad?

Hagarashi8@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 3y

Looks like we will live forever

nLuLukna@lemmy.one · 1 pts · 3y

I might be flushed down a toilet.. LuLu?

CookieJarObserver@feddit.de · 1 pts · 3y
[ removed ]
Ghast@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

In a deep cavern, tricking zombies into following me into a trap, I find out ghasts run faster than the usual shamblers and get eaten.

Hopefully it'll bash my head in before munching on my limbs.

Doug@midwest.social · 1 pts · 3y

Guess I'll need to beware

JuniperusVox@beehaw.org · 1 pts · 3y

A juniper tree yelling at me seems like a uniquely bizarre way to go. Honestly, I'm on board.

Mot@beehaw.org · 1 pts · 3y

Got a few options. Maybe I fall off a cliff while walking backwards. Visit the UK and get struck by a car. Or the Canaanite god of death. Hopefully, it's quick.

Starfish@lemmy.one · 1 pts · 3y

i should avoid sea food

Stumblinbear@pawb.social · 1 pts · 3y (1 reply)

I'm going to be flattened. Honestly there are worse ways to go.

Link@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 3y

Yeah, like a bear with balance

CaptainAlchemy@lemmy.one · 0 pts · 3y

I don't know, but I'm a captain so I might be able to find my way out