Crikey

502 points · 119 comments · view on lemmy.world

119 Comments

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 123 pts · 1y (11 replies)

I am pretty sure I cannot fit a whole dude in my pocket.

idunnololz@lemmy.world · 110 pts · 1y (2 replies)

jaybone@lemmy.zip · 24 pts · 1y (1 reply)

This is much more wholesome than what I was thinking.

NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 1y

That's what you think. This is the fly on his boxer shorts.

pewpew@feddit.it · 47 pts · 1y

It's replaced by an AI chatbot now

ACbHrhMJ@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 1y (3 replies)

Not trying hard enough

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 29 pts · 1y (2 replies)

I try to fit a whole person in my pants every day. They only fit about half the guy, tho. 😔

abbadon420@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 1y

Hi hungry, I'm dad

MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net · 3 pts · 1y

Buy baggy sweatpants. Some of them will go up to your moobs.

neidu3@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 1y

Not with that attitude you won't

state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Grindr exists, you know.

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 1 pts · 1y

I know it's called Grindr, but that's not the kind of grinding it refers to.

tasankovasara@sopuli.xyz · 89 pts · 1y (3 replies)

Pockets have come a long way

Anomalocaris@lemm.ee · 11 pts · 1y (2 replies)

was at a flea market, there was a machete, i jockingly called it a pocket knife, because it fits in a pocket,

put it in my pocket, it fit.

felt bad for my daughter's who will likely never get proper pockets.

who do I need to hack with my pocket knife for them to get normal pockets?

tigolbitties@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 1y

Buy 'em pants from the boys' section

Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y

It's super easy to stitch pockets, then you can make them as deep as you want.

You'll buy the envy and appreciation of all their friends while you're at it, that's one of my cool dad moves.

Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world · 55 pts · 1y (6 replies)

My double standard is that when I see someone with a boombox playing music in public, I'm chill and open to it. When someone does the same thing on their phone, I must work to enhance my calm.

Is it the sound quality? Maybe in part. But there's more to it.

edgemaster72@lemmy.world · 37 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Maybe it's that a boombox playing music is more social and open, whereas what someone does with their phone is typically meant to be private, but some people play their music or w/e noise out loud from it as if only they can hear their phone and you're just supposed to pretend they aren't overstepping boundaries.

Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 1y

I think it's a mindset thing. A boombox means you're thinking about an audience. Consideration is implicit.

makyo@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 1y (2 replies)

I hate when people have boomboxes too

jaybone@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

It’s always on public transit. Like that’s how some people prepare to go out and face the world, by making everyone else listen to their music. Like that’s the best way you can come up with to express yourself?

pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 1y

Yes. At least the person with a boom box brought quality speakers.

Also, their sick roller skate moves timed to their music are pretty great.

Edit: Plus, it's not inconsiderate, because everyone loves "Wham!" (Classic 1980s music, from the last time I saw a boom box in public.)

riskable@programming.dev · 40 pts · 1y (4 replies)

Missing:

  • A game console
  • All the maps in the world + compass
  • Gigantic notepad
  • Calendar
  • Entire stack of catalogs
  • Newspapers
  • Thermostat
  • A whole fucking supercomputer
  • An entire building-sized stack of photo albums
  • Flashlight
  • An sycophant assistant who makes shit up just to keep you happy.
brokenlcd@feddit.it · 13 pts · 1y

An sycophant assistant who makes shit up just to keep you happy.

Who says that man doesn't carry out that function?

kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 1y

Don't forget about fidget apps, so throw in some bubble wrap too.

Samskara@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 1y

A software synthesizer and tracker.

The OP photo is missing an Amiga 1200.

enbiousenvy@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 1y

A humongous calendar in fact. the one that fits a century

Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 40 pts · 1y (8 replies)

Huh, you have a dude in your pants now, congrats.

molten@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 1y (5 replies)

I've always had a dude in my pants

dumbass@quokk.au · 11 pts · 1y (4 replies)

lol, that dudes out there with no dude in his pants, what a dumbass.

Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 1y (3 replies)

Mr dudeless pants!!

... but that's just bcs I don't wear pants, I like to donald-duck it.

dumbass@quokk.au · 4 pts · 1y (2 replies)

You could always keep him in your prison pocket.

Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Nothing but cock & balls hanging out - finally my dickbutt cosplay is complete!

dumbass@quokk.au · 1 pts · 1y

No worries, happy to help!

SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Yeah he provides good vibes.

Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 1y

Nice vibrations.
Positive shakes.
Pleasant bounces.

HiTekRedNek@lemmy.world · 31 pts · 1y

WTF, dude, get out of my pocket!

alzymologist@sopuli.xyz · 20 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Print me something

Whelks_chance@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y

He screamed, loudly then sobbed through tears, at the foot of the table where the Epsom sat mocking him with it's silence.

MehBlah@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 1y (4 replies)

I don't where the dude fits.

Soapbox@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

I think he's chatGPT?

MehBlah@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y

Maybe. I've seen this image for a while now.

CluckN@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y

He goes in the old prison pocket

faythofdragons@slrpnk.net · 1 pts · 1y

idk, the image loaded fine on my phone

kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 1y (1 reply)

TBF, the stereo speakers probably sound better and are certainly capable of being much louder than my phone speakers. But yeah, miles better in every other capacity.

TheKingBee@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y

You can buy a bluetooth speaker that sounds as good (if you don't need real stereo sound) and still have room in your pocket.

LordWiggle@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 1y (6 replies)

Wait... My phone can play cassettes and cd's? Freaking awesome!

SreudianFlip@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 1y

Yes… after you rip them into a mixtape playlist.

jumping_redditor@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y (4 replies)

I wish, but for some reason most Android phones lack the correct drivers to play CD audio

pyre@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y (3 replies)

mine doesn't even have a fucking disc tray

LordWiggle@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y (2 replies)

At least mine has a cassette deck and jack plugs.

tasankovasara@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Eurorack tape module? I want to know what it can do... off googlin'

LordWiggle@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y

Error instruments loopman 1. It can record and playback, at different speeds. You can use existing tapes with music, but also modified tapes with for example 8 sec loop. YouTube video and This video

BilboBargains@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 1y

How big are your pockets?

UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y (9 replies)

You cannot fit three sets of headphones in your pocket without them fucking up your phone or your wallet.

You absolutely positively 100% cannot fit a VHS player inside your pocket.

piranhaconda@mander.xyz · 6 pts · 1y (6 replies)

And a boom box. Sure, phones can play music, but not at the same volume or quality as a dedicated stereo system (quality meaning the frequency response, phones just physically can't get the low end without a separate speaker)

StarMerchant938@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y (2 replies)
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cujo255@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Which speaker is that? I've been sort of on the lookout for a good compact speaker for a while

StarMerchant938@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
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SreudianFlip@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y

I thought so too but remembered yesterday I was working at an office they were putting back together after remodeling, and noticed they were playing music off an iPhone and it was surprisingly loud.

barneypiccolo@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 1y (1 reply)

That's a good thing. You don't remember guys walking down the street, or getting on the subway, carrying a boom box on their shoulder, loudly blasting distorted music you don't care to hear.

Now they just pump it directly into their ears. Let them destroy their own hearing, not everyone else's. They make Bluetooth speakers if you need to broadcast your music to a group.

piranhaconda@mander.xyz · 2 pts · 1y

Ha, no, now they just get in the subways with big Bluetooth speakers and annoy people with that. Boom boxes phasing out didn't stop people from being obnoxious if they want to

SreudianFlip@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

VHS tapes got so small they turned into little bits

UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y

I wish that were true, but I've got a stack of home movies that say differently.

Tiger666@lemmy.ca · 9 pts · 1y (2 replies)

I dont have a human being inside my pocket.

Samskara@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Hello, I’m the human in your pocket.

You can make video phone calls with people.

Tiger666@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 1y

You are my tiny dancer.

Pyr_Pressure@lemmy.ca · 9 pts · 1y

The forgot the encyclopedia set and a couple thousand books and a few hundred video tapes.

CiderApplenTea@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Wish I could (even excl the dude), but women's clothes and phone sizes don't match

Anomalocaris@lemm.ee · -5 pts · 1y

was at a flea market, there was a machete, i jockingly called it a pocket knife, because it fits in a pocket,

put it in my pocket, it fit.

felt bad for my daughter's who will likely never get proper pockets.

who do I need to hack with my pocket knife for them to get normal pockets?

rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 1y (2 replies)

Even ignoring the joke with the dude fitting into your pocket, I cannot fit full over-ear cans I to my pocket... This is just lies.

Chadus_Maximus@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 1y

IEM's my rizza. Also Koss Porta Pros.

HappySkullsplitter@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
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janonymous@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y

Baggy pants are back, baby!

Hackworth@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 1y (3 replies)
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GamingChairModel@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y

The Walkman and other tape players were so much superior to CD players for portability and convenience. Batteries lasted a lot longer for portable tape players than for CD players. Tapes could be remixed easily so you could bring a specific playlist (or 2 or 3) with you. Tapes were much more resilient than CDs. The superior audio quality of CDs didn't matter as much when you were using 1980's era headphones. Or, even if you were using a boombox, the spinning of a disc was still susceptible to bumps or movement causing skips, and the higher speed motor and more complex audio processing drained batteries much faster. And back then, rechargeable batteries weren't really a thing, so people were just burning through regular single use alkaline batteries.

It wasn't until the 90's that decent skip protection, a few generations of miniaturization and improved battery life, and improved headphones made portable CDs competitive with portable tapes.

At the same time, cars started to get CD players, but a typical person doesn't buy a new car every year, so it took a few years for the overall number of cars to start having a decent number of CD players.

JackbyDev@programming.dev · 2 pts · 1y

Why can't this he from 1983 then? Hell, even 1992 isn't crazy.

ryannathans@aussie.zone · 1 pts · 1y

Same thing with blurays and UHD now, DVDs still ahead

barneypiccolo@lemm.ee · 7 pts · 1y (3 replies)

When I was young, I had a bucket list of all the fun gadgets I wanted - a camera, a video camera, a nice stereo system, a portable stereo system, a car stereo, lots of records, a TV, a VCR, a computer, etc. Making a Christmas list was easy, even if I knew I would never get 99% of it.

Now I get asked what I want for Christmas, and I have no idea what to say. My phone includes nearly everything I've ever wanted, including stuff I never thought of. Give me my phone, my guitar, a sandwich, and a bottle of water, and I'm pretty much set for life.

ouRKaoS@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Cool things to ask for for Christmas:

  • Socks: I wear tall boots & long pants for work, so no one knows about my Deadpool/Pokemon/flying taco socks, but it puts a smile on my face. My sister got me a pair of socks with a sad sock sitting on the stairs that say "worst gift ever." I cried laughing.

  • Hobby accessories: You have your guitar, straps, strings, and picks are all perishable items that it's good to have a backup for.

  • Shared experiences: ask for a group trip, a local excursion, or a board game to play together.

  • My favorite - the themed surprise: instead of asking for a specific thing ask for "Something to make me laugh" or "Something nostalgic" or "Something I'll use daily" or "Your favorite recipe and the ingredients to make it". This makes shopping for / creating the gift as much fun as receiving it, since everyone will interpret the instructions a little differently and the possibilities are endless. This one's fun for a themed gift exchange for a secret Santa as well.

barneypiccolo@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 1y

Good suggestions. They actually like to get me little guitar stuff, or music books, I just have to steer it to them, so I put it all into an Amazon list. This year, I'm going to direct them to Stillwater, and give Amazon less business.

tfowinder@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 1y

Nowdays you can ask for a subscription, you are not allowed to own good things sadly

yournamehere@lemm.ee · 7 pts · 1y

nah, the speakers from that boombox are not in my pocket.

Psythik@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1y (3 replies)

Want to really feel old? It's been that way for around 20 years now.

NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 1y (2 replies)

You've had a man in your pocket for 20 years?

tigolbitties@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 1y (1 reply)

No, I'm just happy to see you

NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 1y

For 20 years? That's impressive stamina.

LovableSidekick@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1y (4 replies)

And technically most of it would fit inside your butt. There just isn't a market for butt phones.

ryannathans@aussie.zone · 5 pts · 1y

They called prison phones

0ops@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 1y

Enlightening

absentbird@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 1y
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RagingRobot@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y

I'd call that

jaybone@lemmy.zip · 7 pts · 1y

Except for my lack of self awareness, which I wear dripping down my sleeve.

zalgotext@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 1y (3 replies)

I'm fairly certain that 80's Joe Burrow can't fit in my pocket

Blackmist@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 1y

Isn't that Tackleberry from Police Academy?

Hupf@feddit.org · 1 pts · 1y

Just wait 30-ish more years and hope he gets a cremation.

Might be illegal to put him in your pocket in some countries though.

essell@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y

Even if that was somehow possible, I'm sure it's not desirable.

foggianism@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 1y

Me, from the the future, explaining this meme to people in 1987: We developed new textiles that support giant pockets with incredible durability.

Broadfern@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y

Kinda miss having discrete tech devices to be honest. In the era of non-replaceable phone memory trying to juggle space to hold it all on one device sucks.

ianfraserkrillmaster@midwest.social · 5 pts · 1y

how big are your damn pockets?

baronvonj@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y (2 replies)

I'm more than 50% sure I briefly worked with this guy.

pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Yeah. I've been meaning to call you to catch up. Sorry.

baronvonj@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y

I imagine it's been difficult to find your phone with all that other stuff in your pocket.

vane@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y

I prefer the things on the picture. Look how many cool gadgets you could have, now you're just computer user.

flandish@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y

jokes on you, I still wear jnkos.

zod000@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 1y

I wish I had a boombox with a cassette player in my pocket.

Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y (2 replies)

When I went on a trip in the early 2000s, I took a phone, a satnav, an MP3 player, a camera and for longer trips a netbook with a UMTS stick (3G modem you could plug into a USB port). Plus all the associated chargers, cables and other gubbins. I felt really cool and modern with my huge, clunky tech bag. Now that seems quaint and outdated. I wonder if people will feel the same about smartphones in 20 years.

LadyButterfly@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 1y (1 reply)

We'll have microchips in our eyes by that point

LucasWaffyWaf@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y

Ah, the Eyephone

SnekZone@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 1y (1 reply)

There's no way I can fit this dude in there!

Anomalocaris@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 1y

try more lube

WizardofFrobozz@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 1y

I've lived both, am fully addicted to my phone, and genuinely believe we were better off then.

barnaclebutt@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y

That lucky guy gets to own his things!

janus2@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 1y

including the handses

DmMacniel@feddit.org · 2 pts · 1y

Ah yes I remember wearing 3 personal cassette players, and a disc man at the same fricking time.

atlien51@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 1y

Yes and we’re all the better for it!

843563115848@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 1y

Only if you are paying for data access.

neidu3@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 1y
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joyjoy@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 1y

Have you seen the size of pockets back then?

mugthol@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 1y

Is think this is the most pedantic comment section I've seen so far

NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone · 1 pts · 1y (1 reply)

Alarmed by the intimation that the bloke has been cremated or compacted somehow.

brokenlcd@feddit.it · 1 pts · 1y

I mean, i think a video call works just as well, but you do you.

rirus@feddit.org · 1 pts · 1y

You forgot books and magazines

regularking2728@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y

Hmm

LanguageIsCool@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 1y
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