A friend of mine actually has glacier freeze colored eyes. We were on a psychedelic adventure and I got it in my head that I NEEDED to taste his eyeballs. He finally let me and I was extremely disappointed that they just tasted like eyeball, not Gatorade.
This was written by a guy who had nothing but sports for a career path that got an injury which meant they would never go pro and they had to switch majors to literature, thinking that writing is "hella easy bro".
He pepsied over to her, shooting her a cool fanta glance that she avoided chester cheeterly. "Why won't you look at me?" he lionbarred, his lips trembling like coco pops. "I... I... just caan't!" she freddied, clear salty caramel drops falling from her hershey eyes as she pulled out her magnum and starbursted into his chest, leaving three skittle shaped holes where his aero heart was. He slumped over, spilling vimto everywhere. Then a big wave of chocolate just, I dunno, sweeps everyone out into sea.
Her eyes were the striking blue of glacier freeze. Accented by her cheeks, flushed as fruit punch. Her demeanor was mysterious, yet refreshing, like lemon lime on a hot summer day. Her dress the color of citrus cooler.
Honestly it kind of works with the flavor names and less "like". It'd be a great little joke to slide into something.
Yellow gatorade isnt mysterious... White gatorade is.
Yellow gatorade is lemon. White gatorade can be literally anything. Sometimes it's cherry, sometimes it's grape, sometimes it tastes like Red and other times it tastes like Blue.
39 Comments
phorq@lemmy.ml · 53 pts · 1y
This has what romance readers crave, it's got elEctrolYtes!
I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 1y
A friend of mine actually has glacier freeze colored eyes. We were on a psychedelic adventure and I got it in my head that I NEEDED to taste his eyeballs. He finally let me and I was extremely disappointed that they just tasted like eyeball, not Gatorade.
merari42@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
Is the Mind-Altering substance you and your friends were consuming spice? It is known to lead to blue eyeballs.
Death_Equity@lemmy.world · 34 pts · 1y
This was written by a guy who had nothing but sports for a career path that got an injury which meant they would never go pro and they had to switch majors to literature, thinking that writing is "hella easy bro".
four@lemmy.zip · 27 pts · 1y
Men writing women smh my head
Zachariah@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 1y
Is fluidicication better or worse than objectification?
fartographer@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 1y
Certainly better than spaghettification
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 14 pts · 1y
Heresy against his Noodliness
voodooattack@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
Shake my head my head?
Godric@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 1y
tetris11@lemmy.ml · 25 pts · 1y
He pepsied over to her, shooting her a cool fanta glance that she avoided chester cheeterly. "Why won't you look at me?" he lionbarred, his lips trembling like coco pops. "I... I... just caan't!" she freddied, clear salty caramel drops falling from her hershey eyes as she pulled out her magnum and starbursted into his chest, leaving three skittle shaped holes where his aero heart was. He slumped over, spilling vimto everywhere. Then a big wave of chocolate just, I dunno, sweeps everyone out into sea.
Tiger@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 1y
Bravo!
Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 1y
Honestly it kind of works with the flavor names and less "like". It'd be a great little joke to slide into something.
Hagdos@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
The "kind of" is doing the heavy lifting here
Zoomboingding@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 1y
Skullgrid@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 1y
the title is the best part of this post, great work OP
TomMasz@piefed.social · 11 pts · 1y
Gatorade is like summer camp bug juice, you refer to it by color, not flavor.
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 10 pts · 1y
The flavor is mostly just sugar anyways
exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 1y
I would argue that the citric acid is as important of a flavor component.
swab148@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 1y
I would argue against you, but I'd be wrong
someguy3@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 1y
He thirsts for electrolytes.
spankmonkey@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y
Elle Ectrolytes
kamen@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y
"Her eyes were like stars. Not because they sparkled but because they were so far apart."
merari42@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
Anya Taylor Joy?
Kyrgizion@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y
When AI takes over content creation we're going to see this unironically.
fushuan@piefed.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 1y
when?
fartographer@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y
right meow
LaunchesKayaks@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 1y
Men writing women
dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works · 9 pts · 1y
She crossed her arms under her breasts, then tugged her braid.
Godric@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y
That phrase literally ruined the author for me
artichokecustard@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 1y
jordan?
Godric@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
Yep, who else?
FarraigePlaisteach@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
I used to enjoy following that community on another platform before I left.
MTK@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 1y
This would be a quote from a book in idiocracy if they knew how to read.
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 7 pts · 1y
Yellow gatorade isnt mysterious... White gatorade is.
Yellow gatorade is lemon. White gatorade can be literally anything. Sometimes it's cherry, sometimes it's grape, sometimes it tastes like Red and other times it tastes like Blue.
Noturbuddy@lemmy.zip · 7 pts · 1y
But it always reminds me of you 🤩❤️😉
CetaceanNeeded@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
She sounds like she's from an early 2000's music video.
Lemminary@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y
Poetry is so beautiful
UltraMagnus0001@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y
Gatorade is for farming