c/nottheonion · by technocrit@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 339d

Trump to host UFC octagon cage fight on White House lawn in 2026

https://www.euronews.com/2025/09/08/trump-to-host-ufc-octagon-cage-fight-on-white-house-lawn-to-mark-250-years-of-us-independe

281 points · 50 comments · view on lemmy.world

50 Comments

ThePowerOfGeek@lemmy.world · 82 pts · 339d (4 replies)

How long before the Presidency starts hosting monster truck themed executions at the Whitehouse? It can't be much longer now.

ApeNo1@lemmy.world · 62 pts · 339d (3 replies)

The Jimmy Kimmel and Stephen Colbert shows will be replaced with everyone’s favourite hit, “Ow! My Balls!”

some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 339d

Go away, batin'!

hector@lemmy.today · 6 pts · 338d

Which is classic real conservative American humor. People getting hurt.

Madison420@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 338d

Japan beat us to that one like a half a dozen times by now and still have a functioning society.

ininewcrow@lemmy.ca · 64 pts · 339d (3 replies)

Blackfeathr@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 339d (1 reply)

Camacho 2028

Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca · 21 pts · 338d

Camacho was actually a fairly good president compared to your current guy. Consider:

He appointed an expert to fix a problem he couldn't and actually took his advice.

He was willing to course correct when new information was presented to him.

I don't believe that President Camacho was a disgusting pedo.

ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 14 pts · 338d

Except Camacho was actually humble and driven entirely by duty. So much so that when they found someone he knew was smarter than him he was fully ready to give up his office. It was a matter of practicality and not ego for him.

undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch · 48 pts · 339d (1 reply)

This is some hick-ass shit

betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 339d

Guy knows his base (if nothing else).

Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works · 47 pts · 339d (5 replies)

This guy will do absolutely anything to distract from the fact he refuses to release the Epstein Files, which he is CLEARLY named multiple times in... Possibly hundreds of times.

Blackfeathr@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 339d (3 replies)

Likely more than that. Didn't he task like 1,000 FBI agents to work long hours redacting his name?

birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 5 pts · 338d (2 replies)

I heard it's 2,000!

Blackfeathr@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 338d

All the best people are saying it!

lost_faith@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 338d

Isn't he Doe174?

Mirshe@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 339d

Oh this was set up well before all that. UFC and Trump inked this deal back in, like, April as I remember.

ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 31 pts · 339d (1 reply)

Ten bucks says this is all happening because, somewhere along the way, someone explained to him that an octagon has more sides than a pentagon.

stoy@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 339d

Isn't Egypt building a proper octagon as their defence HQ?

karashta@piefed.social · 29 pts · 339d

He is such trash

ooterness@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 339d

taiyang@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 339d (1 reply)

Wow, now that's a not-the-onion post for sure, yikes.

Oddly, not the first time people did trashy shit on the White House lawn. Look up Andrew Jacksons fucking hillbilly BBQs--- just as racist, too!

Skullgrid@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 338d

I came in this thread to post something like

Andrew Jackson's back

Andrew Jackson, is that you?

After this, the next thing is WWE at the white house, giving the favour back to Vince McMahon

SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca · 20 pts · 338d

Stay classy, America.

phoenixarise@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 339d

lol so trashy. Idiocracy in action.

gianni@lemmy.ca · 19 pts · 339d (1 reply)

Brawndo's got what plants crave.

ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 2 pts · 338d

Water? Like from a toilet?

thelittleerik@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 339d (2 replies)

Somebody fucking shoot him already. Jesus christ end this fucking nightmare.

nnullzz@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 339d

Honestly, the follow up with Vance + Thiel taking the reins scares me a whole lot more.

Skullgrid@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 338d

They did

Franconian_Nomad@feddit.org · 15 pts · 338d

I was so sure that it was The Onion just by reading the headline. Well… fuck.

quick_snail@feddit.nl · 12 pts · 338d (1 reply)

Is it going to be two black wage slaves, trying to feed their families?

Lorax@feddit.uk · 5 pts · 338d

Trump getting into the Mandingo game...

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 11 pts · 339d

In 2056 a meme starts going around about how in 2026 JD Vance threw Donald Trump off the Hell in a Cell cage on the White House lawn, and he plummeted 16 feet through the announcer's table.

DarkFuture@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 338d

Lol.

The presidency. The White House. Medals of Freedom. Our democracy.

None of these mean anything anymore.

ohulancutash@feddit.uk · 10 pts · 339d

Right after he opens a trailer park on the Mall.

Aatube@kbin.melroy.org · 7 pts · 339d

read this headline like four times lol

pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 5 pts · 339d

Clown world

XTL@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 339d

That almost looks like a distraction from something.