Old is better than none

689 points · 85 comments · view on lemmy.world

85 Comments

Texas_Hangover@lemmy.radio · 129 pts · 332d (5 replies)

That pussy ain't old.

Shit. Maybe I'm old...

TheLowestStone@lemmy.world · 54 pts · 332d (2 replies)

I can't be old, the 80's were only... Oh no...

tetris11@feddit.uk · 6 pts · 331d (1 reply)

I got love for you if you were born in the 80s

doingthestuff@lemy.lol · 3 pts · 331d

I was tearing up Minneapolis, San Francisco and Duesseldorf in the 80s. In the 70s I was in Portland. Yeah Portland was weird even back then.

phutatorius@lemmy.zip · 13 pts · 331d

You're not really old until judges are older than you.

Source: am really old.

SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 331d

That is mature pussy. Well trained.

WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world · 118 pts · 332d (13 replies)

I just saw a post that touches on this a few days ago. I'll share the Ben Franklin quote once more, and never again after because I find it painfully crass.

 The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.    
Blumpkinhead@lemmy.world · 48 pts · 332d (5 replies)

Damn, Ben Franklin was a dog lol

ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 331d

You should read up on him. He was the dog of all dogs. He also wrote a long, satirical paper entirely about farting, called A Letter to a Royal Academy on Farting or Fart Proudly.

phutatorius@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 331d (3 replies)

From the same letter:

And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.

ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 331d (2 replies)

You might want to learn about horizontal scroll bars.

tetris11@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 331d (1 reply)

OP should learn fixed-width indentation

ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 331d

It's ironic that we're talking about the famous printer Ben Franklin here!

lmmarsano@lemmynsfw.com · 29 pts · 332d (1 reply)

long horizontal scrollbox

The standard editor links to formatting help with markdown guide explaining blockquotes.

WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 332d

The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.

tdawg@lemmy.world · 28 pts · 332d

Experience is the real decider anyway imo

snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 332d (3 replies)

In a nutshell: "The legs are the last thing that goes".

WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 332d (1 reply)

I guess the legs are under the girdle too so maybe that is what he meant.

Horsecook@sh.itjust.works · 22 pts · 332d
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HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 332d
Devanismyname@lazysoci.al · 78 pts · 332d (9 replies)

Most guys totally would

chonkyninja@lemmy.world · 33 pts · 332d (1 reply)

Can confirm, would.

TrickDacy@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 332d

Yeah. Especially considering this is probably not even the best picture

Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca · 24 pts · 332d

It’s like no one has ever heard of a cougar.

Gullible@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 332d (4 replies)

Hmm, I wonder whether that’s the case. Alright, ~10% of men are gay and 2% are ace or aro. That’s 88% who might. Now, 25% of married men cheat on their spouses and about 50% of men are married or in a comparable relationship. That means that 12.5% of men might consider it and 37.5 wouldn’t. Let’s round on the safe side. 52% might consider it. Anyone have statistics on racial/age preference or rejection from men? I’ve done all I can

OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world · 28 pts · 332d

Sorry mate, too busy thinking about banging this gal

Devanismyname@lazysoci.al · 4 pts · 332d (2 replies)

This doesnt make you seem smart. Obviously i meant most guys would want to, not most would actually if they are married or whatever.

Gullible@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 332d

If my goofy math seems to be self aggrandizing, that’s a you problem. I didn’t sign up for lemmy to be taken seriously

Guitarfun@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 332d

It's obviously a joke dude :)

snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 332d

TIL I am most guys.

Dorkyd68@lemmy.world · 58 pts · 332d (7 replies)

I must agree with madam. Though she ain't old, that's fine wine right there. Bet she could break yo dick

AntiBullyRanger@ani.social · 11 pts · 332d (6 replies)

She’s not talking about herself with that shirt. 🏳️‍🧡‍🤍‍💜🥓✂️👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

bathing_in_bismuth@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 332d (5 replies)

That doesnt even make sense.

AntiBullyRanger@ani.social · 2 pts · 332d (4 replies)

Cats, or coochie?

Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 331d (3 replies)

The last two I get, but bacon?

AntiBullyRanger@ani.social · 9 pts · 331d (2 replies)

It’s a lavender joke that the most popular lesbian flag looks like a strip of bacon. Thus it's like waving another sapphic flag.

Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 331d (1 reply)

Sorry, lavender?

AntiBullyRanger@ani.social · 1 pts · 331d

Now I feel like y'all pulling my 🦵. Lavender language.

VitoRobles@lemmy.today · 56 pts · 332d (2 replies)

Leonardo DiCaprio leaves the chat.

Cort@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 332d

Good, with Leo gone, there's room for Ben Franklin.

The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.

sunzu2@thebrainbin.org · 3 pts · 332d
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Pandantic@midwest.social · 46 pts · 332d

Some cougars prowl in the dark, but some are confident enough in their ability to do their prowling at the grocery store. 😏

zululove@lemmy.ml · 28 pts · 332d

Certified freak after she puts the kids to sleep 😴

sunbytes@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 332d (8 replies)

I'd also love if his is one of those situations where she's actually in another country (and doesn't speak English herself) but just really likes this cool tshirt she found online.

I used to love these on reddit. My favorite was a really sweet, dorky looking East-Asian guy wearing a sweater that said "I don't need life, I'm high on drugs".

I also was given a tshirt that it turns out just said variations of "get girls" all over it in Chinese script, and I wore it for years until a Taiwanese friend told me what it meant.

cdf12345@lemmy.zip · 18 pts · 331d

When I saw this earlier I thought it might be the case

SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 331d (1 reply)

I cracked up when I saw this young girl in China wearing a tshirt with the teletubbies on it and "Cocaine" across it.

ThunderQueen@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 331d
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ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 331d

I like the one of the guy in Africa wearing a "burn this flag, asshole" t-shirt.

Edgarallenpwn@midwest.social · 5 pts · 331d

China has some fun stuff. A friend of mine picked up a magnet for me that says "under fog she is beautiful clear morning she is zombie."

Apparently that was a print the store was running, but she didn't want to buy me the shirt. I get why, but thats been my favorite fridge magnet for years.

tetris11@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 331d

I mean, did it work?

Psythik@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 331d (1 reply)

Judging by the design of the cart and the "Great Value" brand sliced ham in it, she's at an American Walmart, so it's unlikely that she doesn't understand English (although possible, of course).

ThunderQueen@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 331d
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ExtremeDullard@piefed.social · 26 pts · 332d (2 replies)

Not for Epstein or Trump it ain't.

sundray@lemmus.org · 17 pts · 332d (1 reply)

Sick fucks.

Akasazh@feddit.nl · 7 pts · 332d

That pic in this context is absolutely revolting.

Thnx!

motor_spirit@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 332d (1 reply)
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snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 332d

I like the way she boobs.

But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 332d (1 reply)

Im 41 and I would nestle plunge into that fine lady

MiDaBa@lemmy.ml · 25 pts · 332d

Let that be a warning to you young dudes. Watch your mom cause when we say it, we'll follow through. 😂

SaneMartigan@aussie.zone · 21 pts · 332d

Maybe that pretty lady likes older women.

SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 331d (1 reply)

If she is fine with old cock we are good.

MeThisGuy@feddit.nl · 1 pts · 331d

as long as the good 'ol cockle doo

Eat_Your_Paisley@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 332d (1 reply)

I'd say its better than young in most cases

Kaliax@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 332d

Okay, Mr. Benjamin Franklin.

iamericandre@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 332d

I think I’m in love

DrDystopia@lemy.lol · 10 pts · 332d (2 replies)

I'm starting to figure out why ol' folks liked Tricky Dick.

ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 331d (1 reply)

Damn, I remember the good old days when Tricky Dick was the worst Republican imaginable.

ICastFist@programming.dev · 2 pts · 331d

It only took 2 elections for a worse republican to take charge.

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 6 pts · 331d

Nah, she is fine as fuck. She would get plenty of attention, for sure.

WhatGodIsMadeOf@feddit.org · 5 pts · 331d

We buy the same cold cuts. I think I'm in love.

iridebikes@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 331d (9 replies)

Why would someone wear that in public? Big yikes.

jaupsinluggies@feddit.uk · 34 pts · 331d (1 reply)

I think it's to cover up her tits.

Pat_Riot@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 331d

Didn't work.

Bakkoda@sh.itjust.works · 16 pts · 331d (3 replies)

20 year ago me would have thought that was the perfect amount of trashy. I have regrets.

jdf038@mander.xyz · 6 pts · 331d (1 reply)

But also experiences

TheGoldenV@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 331d

*STIs

bestagon@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 331d

Oh look, it’s me 20 years from now

MithranArkanere@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 331d (1 reply)

I see maybe 3 reasons:

  • Lost a bet.
  • Proud cougar.
  • Everything else was in the washer.
ouRKaoS@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 331d
  • Got dressed in the dark

  • Karen / child repellent

  • Practices the subtle art of not giving a fuck

lmmarsano@lemmynsfw.com · 3 pts · 331d

Big yikes.

kink-shaming

HalfSalesman@lemmy.world · -2 pts · 331d

Good thing I don't need to worry about getting no pussy.

captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works · -13 pts · 332d (9 replies)

It's not the years, it's the mileage.

SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world · 22 pts · 332d (5 replies)

A pussy isn’t a glove or a shoe that shit doesn’t wear out.

dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 332d (4 replies)

Spoken like someone who has never worn one out!

(My wife is on her fourth one, and if you have to ask you can't afford it.)

SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world · 6 pts · 332d (1 reply)

Yeah but they only have to rebuild the first inch.

dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 332d

That is true (not to toot my own horn or anything).

Kaerkob@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 332d
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moody@lemmings.world · 4 pts · 332d

Is that what a Z-job is?

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 13 pts · 332d (2 replies)

This is a statement only believed by virgins who have never actually interacted with a vagina.

captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 332d (1 reply)

Or it's a quote from Indiana Jones.

SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world · 4 pts · 332d

In this case it’s both!