Pedo knows that God knows the truth.
Archive article: https://archive.is/qJDva
Trump, 79, Admits He Might Not Get Into Heaven
https://www.thedailybeast.com/donald-trump-79-admits-he-isnt-going-to-heaven/
https://www.thedailybeast.com/donald-trump-79-admits-he-isnt-going-to-heaven/
Pedo knows that God knows the truth.
Archive article: https://archive.is/qJDva
63 Comments
credo@lemmy.world · 93 pts · 307d
“You cannot serve both God and money.” (Matthew 6:24)
“It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.” (Mark 10:25)
Kinda makes you wonder how it’s possible to be pro-capitalist and pro-Christian. Or.. in other words, how it’s possible to ever be in compliance with Trump’s NSPM #7.
xyzzy@lemmy.today · 51 pts · 307d
NoSpotOfGround@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 307d
That is fun. TIL.
Nollij@sopuli.xyz · 8 pts · 307d
The story I'd heard was not that it's a transcription error, but closer to a pun. Readers would be familiar with the term for a ship's rope, and the minor linguistic shift highlighted the absurdity of such an idea.
Interesting though about translations to other languages. I'll have to dig further on the subject.
xyzzy@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 307d
Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de · 7 pts · 307d
So it's not a challenge for a rich person to extrude camels through eyes of needles?
BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 307d
God gives grace to those he blesses, or something idk.
I've actually been in a US Southern megachurch, that "interpreted" that verse.
They went on about how certain gates were called needles and camels fit through very nicely, they just had a different gate, maybe put down their stuff first.
I just remembered the gist: obey and God gives you stuff, your stuff is a symbol of your piety and proof that you are one of God's chosen.
xyzzy@lemmy.today · 10 pts · 307d
HubertManne@piefed.social · 4 pts · 307d
yup. its what I want is literal and what does not fit is metaphor.
Fandangalo@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 307d
Acts 2:43-47 “Life Among Believers”
The believers sold all their stuff, loved everyone, and things were great. If the US is a Christian nation, why aren’t we doing that? (Rhetorical)
magic_lobster_party@fedia.io · 6 pts · 307d
Just say that you’re God’s special little boy. Then you’re free to commit as many sins you like.
FunctionallyLiterate@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 307d
No no, no - that's not it. You have to get your sycophants to say it.
stringere@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 307d
Does a 3d printed camel count if you consider the extruder a needle?
RaoulDuke@fedia.io · 50 pts · 307d
jonne@infosec.pub · 12 pts · 307d
Yeah, I still have champagne in the fridge from his last health scare.
Adderbox76@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 307d
When it happens, the first we'll hear of it is out of the blue some random ewoks will start singing Yub-nub.
Rakonat@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 307d
So much headline baiting these days
SippyCup@lemmy.ml · 48 pts · 307d
GOD DAMNIT
I saw "Trump, 79..." And my heart thought that was an obituary and it knew joy. For one minor fleeting second.
oopsgodisdeadmybad@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 307d
That's how I felt for that week-ish when he disappeared and no one was confirming he wasn't dead.
D_C@sh.itjust.works · 31 pts · 307d
Oh, wow, really? Ok, was it all the child raping and the life of crime that makes him think this?
NutWrench@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 307d
I'm guessing Trump got some bad news from a real doctor after his second "annual visit" to Walter Reed hospital.
D_C@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 307d
I fucking hope so.
Fingers crossed it's a nice bout of inoperable and debilitating cancer.
z3rOR0ne@lemmy.ml · 29 pts · 307d
"Hey! Welcome to Heaven! Congratulations! You lived a virtuous life free of sin and full of good deeds. How would you like to spend eternity?"
"Where's Donald Trump!?!?"
"Uhh...he's very much in Hell...he wasn't exactly...Heaven...material."
"Yeah, I know. I'd like to spend my eternity in Hell watching him burn!"
"sighs Are you sure? This is an eternity you're talking about here."
"Did I stutter?"
"sighs loudly No...no you didn't, portal opens..."
NABDad@lemmy.world · 33 pts · 307d
"Ok, but all the good seats are taken. You'll be way in the back at this point."
LastYearsIrritant@sopuli.xyz · 16 pts · 307d
It is hell after all
800XL@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 307d
That would require heaven to be real first. Old man turnip knows this. We all saw how he holds a bible. His fundie bootlickers should realize this but since he hates the same things they do they're blinded to the fact he hates them too.
And fuck Stephen Miller.
NABDad@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 307d
I don't know that President Pedophile actually knows that heaven isn't real.
He has the same understanding of heaven that my dad has. He believes if he is what he thinks a Christian is, he can just pretend to be sorry at the end and God has to let him in. However, he's never actually paid any attention to anything the Bible says about what Jesus is.
Also, if it's all just a bullshit scam to him, why would he ever suggest there's a possibility that God wouldn't embrace him? There's no benefit to that, only risk. What if some of his deluded followers start to question if he was really sent by God?
Jaysyn@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 307d
This.
Nearly every "Christian" I know acts like a.) they've never read their Bible and B.) their God has the mental capacity of a 7 year old child.
CXORA@aussie.zone · 1 pts · 307d
nickiwest@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 306d
As people age, they start to think about what comes next, and the idea of an afterlife is a lot more appealing than nothingness. I think a lot of non-religious older folks go all in on Pascal's Wager when they are faced with their own mortality.
TallonMetroid@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 307d
El Taco should have thought of that before he spent a lifetime as a rapist piece of shit. But maybe he can convert to Catholicism and buy off the Pope*!
*this is not how indulgences actually work and would not actually help
sauerkrautsaul@lemmus.org · 4 pts · 307d
did you just post about how the christian kingdom of heaven works
FunctionallyLiterate@lemmy.ca · 19 pts · 307d
If he's willing to admit that publicly, then I'll bet deep down he knows he's going down in the history books as one of the (if not the) worst presidents America ever had. It's a shame he's not likely to still be around to see the full devastation of the country his actions this year are about to lead to, and hopefully the ultimate rejection of everything he worked for once the sheep are finally no longer under his spell.
xyzzy@lemmy.today · 9 pts · 307d
FunctionallyLiterate@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 307d
Yeah, you're probably right - it's pretty typical for someone like that to justify the hate they get to themselves by telling themselves they're simply "misunderstood," and that people will learn to appreciate his "genius" later. MAGAt coping all the way to the top.
Ging@anarchist.nexus · 6 pts · 307d
"Rumor has it he'll have gas under 2$/gal by December"
NoSpotOfGround@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 307d
This actually ties together a lot of his actions in the past while. This is what's on his mind.
veroxii@aussie.zone · 7 pts · 307d
He thinks a Nobel peace prize will cancel out the other stuff. But he thinks it's just the actual prize... Like it's a secret key... Not the being a good person who deserves the prize.
MagicShel@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 307d
Maybe he's planning to argue his case with St. Peter and wants to accumulate proof of his deeds.
Grimy@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 307d
"most associated name with a potential anti-christ ponders how he might not get into heaven"
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 307d
Nero?
ShittDickk@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 307d
There is always a guaranteed way to get into heaven and that is confess to all your sins, live on TV, with the names of co-conspirators as well.
Zink@programming.dev · 2 pts · 306d
I just thought of a great way for the current Pope to really make a name for himself as the one to stop so much evil pedo shit. Man, talk about rehabbing the image of the church (in the minds of people who pay little enough attention).
Live global broadcast of Trump doing confession with the pope. Trump info dumps either with a camera in the confession booth, or by making a public statement afterward as penance, even if he just reads a prepared statement in either case.
Then the pope says ok you're going to heaven, and the rest of us try to get the gears of justice turning again.
JeeBaiChow@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 307d
Start shaking down the Pope, and the priests and maybe he can get elected as a cardinal and then he can get the rules changed? Worked for him once, I mean...
ripcord@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 307d
Don't think it'd work with THIS Pope, but who knows
madcaesar@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 307d
If there is a heaven, and people like Trump get in, send me straight to hell.
Jolly_Platypus@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 307d
He's not going to live to see the midterms.
cheers_queers@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 307d
Stop, im gonna cum
HubertManne@piefed.social · 1 pts · 307d
spray it all over me baby.
fluxion@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 307d
I don't think even Hell wants him at this point
OsrsNeedsF2P@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 307d
Damn I'm surprised how confident he sounds about that
favoredponcho@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 307d
EmpireInDecay@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 307d
I saw the title and was gonna get ready to piss on a grave
MuskyMelon@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 307d
Stay in limbo for eternity you fat rapist pedophile
Formfiller@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 306d
Release the un redacted Epstein list
Create a universal healthcare system
Create free college
Abolish ice, Stop kidnapping people and pass a bipartisan immigration reform bill
Defund Israel
Defund palantir
Enact a 90% tax rate on capital gains and income over 1 million a year.
Hire back everyone you fired
Donate all your wealth to charity
It’s a start. Might not get you into heaven but you may get out of the deepest circle of hell
devolution@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 307d
He'll be fine. Trump is going to have a long healthy life because with modern conservatives, hell has a waiting list.
Corelli_III@midwest.social · 3 pts · 307d
wow more kayfabe thanks OP i'll put this in the kayfabe outhouse
qarbone@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 306d
This tells me that even he knows his candle's sputtering out. I just hope he's snuffed soon; it'd make a wonderful Christmas gift.
Colonel_Panic@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 307d
Depends. Is it the OLD TESTAMENT God? If so, tRump will fit right in.
RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 307d
That's impossible. You can't campaign for a Nobel Peace prize and not think you're going to heaven. It makes no sense.
ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works · -8 pts · 307d
Catholics consider the idea that any living person can be sure of getting into heaven a heresy. Trump isn't Catholic but he's still not saying anything theologically controversial here.
andros_rex@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 307d
That’s not at all a modern American “nondenominational” Protestant attitude though. If you are saved, you are supposed to be assured that you are getting into Heaven.
ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 307d
That's true, and I think that Trump is actually not a Catholic theologian but rather that he is expressing the view, common among cultural Christians today, that God weighs a person's good and bad deeds against each other. There's still the hope for divine forgiveness in this view, but the abandonment of the idea of unearned grace is contrary to the teachings of every Christian denomination, as far as I know.
andros_rex@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 306d
It’s just odd. Been reading Martin Luther lately and it’s the antithesis to everything he’s saying about faith versus works. And if he was Calvinist, his position in life would be part of being “elect” anyway.
It’s amazing that we have a wannabe theocrat who makes a mockery of the religion that is supposed to be supreme here. Everything’s made up and the points don’t matter.
ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 306d
I wouldn't say that Trump is interested in being a theocrat - his movement pays lip service to Christianity as part of its nostalgic fantasy of America the way that it used to be, but the actual Christian conservative movement has been sidelined within the Republican party since 2016 (if not earlier). Trump and his inner circle care about Christianity only to the extent that it is a label that divides "us" from "them".
Lodespawn@aussie.zone · 3 pts · 307d
Yeah because reconciliation isn't a thing or anything ..
ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 307d
Confession is not permanent, in the sense that it does not absolve the penitent of future sin. That's one reason why last rites are important.
NABDad@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 307d
Here's a question for the Catholics out there: does absolution work if you aren't really penitent? If you don't even understand why what you're confessing is wrong, can you really be sorry?
I was raised Lutheran, and it was always clear in that church that all that mattered was what was in your heart. No one could act as intercessor between you and God. You couldn't scam your way out of judgement.
HubertManne@piefed.social · 3 pts · 307d
if your confessing you must see it as wrong in some way. keep in mind non general christians see general christian doctrine as you can be the worst possible piece of shit ever second of every day of your life but accept jesus in the last second before death and its all good.
Cracks_InTheWalls@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 307d
IIRC there are prescribed acts you can do that should be a form of penitence - that whole "Say 10 Hail Mary's and don't call Satan in the morning" thing. It feels a little akin to a kid, caught doing something bad to their neighbour's property by mom, getting dragged to the neighbour's door to apologize. There's a good chance they are apologizing without actually feeling penitent, but once the conditions of the punishment are carried out, they are in a sense free to go.
Like with the above, I think the idea is that you should truly feel penitent and these acts are an honest expression of that. But if we take a look at the history of the Catholic Church I'm not convinced that wasn't put to the wayside a long time ago (see the trade of plenary indulgences in the middle ages).
Second the request any comments from ex- or current Catholics though, this is just my impression from the outside/watching a lapsed Catholic grapple with their faith.