What about, hear me out here, what about if a man, like an old man, and not just any old man, a scientist, a old man scientist in a labcoat, what about, wait for it, what about if he were to, hold on, if he were to, here it comes, turn himself into a pickle?! Funniest shit I've ever seen.
Some people are so allergic that they need different cooking stations to prepare their food and this also tells the person preparing to wear different gloves
Bingo. My coworker needed this almost everywhere that served baked goods because she had a serious cinnamon allergy. Depending on what was being made, it could be bad enough that just the scent of something baking that contained a decent amount of cinnamon, like pies, would be enough to need a couple Benadryl.
I don't know, as someone with a nut allergy I don't get why this is supposed to be funny. This is just my everyday life. Especially salad often has nuts like walnuts or almonds as decoration so it's one of the foods where I have to be extra careful. Just like I always have to follow a coffee order with "no nuts, please", because coffee is often decorated with almonds.
The tweet makes it sound like asking for no nuts on a salad is as outlandish as thinking there might be a bee in the steak, but walnuts, cashews or almonds are pretty common decorations on salads.
Ever since I ordered a 7-cheese macaroni and cheese side dish that lovingly named each cheese and didn't mention it had chunks of bacon mixed in, I ask to be sure.
I would assume a lot of fear isn't just from the Sallad having nuts, but that it would be cross contaminated.
I don't know where you get coffee where they decorate it with nuts, but I need to know. So I can avoid them. Not that I'm allergic. I just think that's sacrilegious.
Most cafés don't, but I like to go to the smaller ones, not the big chains, and they can sometimes get very creative with almonds or hazelnut deco. It's not the majority, but I don't like to waste food so I always ask.
I think people with food allergies should not go to restaurants ever. Your health & life are at stake, and you are inconveniencing everyone including yourself. Just prepare food yourself at home. I have no allergies and I don't even go to restaurants. Restaurants are excessive & unnecessary luxuries for everyone.
"I don't have allergies and even I don't go to restaurants, so people with allergies don't deserve to experience normal human life because it's inconvenient for other people. "
Get off your highly horse and get fucked by it, buddy.
I hardly ever go out other than drinking but going out is such a huge part of all society. I've always refused to go out with colleagues because I can't expect a team of work colleagues to always go to the one restaurant I know is save. Have you got any ideas how many fights with superiors and HR that got me in because "that's part of the work culture and team spirit" and I'm always "the complicated one"?
Restaurants aren't just a luxury. As I said, I hardly ever go out, but try having any career when you're the only one who never joins for work lunches or after-work dinner. Or your friends birthday. Or the meeting of the friendgroup.
Going out to eat is deeply ingrained in our culture and it has serious effects on your social life if you refuse to do it.
Restaurants want people to always tell their server if they have any allergies regardless if it's in the thing is they are ordering. Not all menu items may list every single ingredient in the description and people have some uncommon allergies. Garlic is ubiquitous and it might in your salad dressing. Tell your server if you are allergic. Plus, cross contamination is a thing and chefs need to know to be mindful. Did nuts come anywhere near that salad? Let's make sure that doesn't happen.
If you’re not gluten-intolerant, you’ll be surprised to know how many things they put flour into. It’s so ubiquitous to the human diet you can find it in virtually everything across all kinds of cuisine.
This scenario was basically my life’s story and I had to do this every time I went to restaurant back then. Thankfully I’m no longer gluten-sensitive.
P.S. Even factory-made plain potato chips aren’t safe. (Check the labels very carefully!)
How do I get a drink with no ice in it? Every time I say "no ice", I get ice. I even tried asking for no ice, the drink, no ice, in a glass with no ice, and STILL GOT ICE WITH IT.
Adding ice is just filling your cup with 60% water. Filling the same cup with the same drink and no ice would be less profitable because you'd wait longer to order another.
My wife has the same problem, something we do if we havent been to a place before (our regular places are goos about no ice) she will order "water no ice" and Ill get something that is not water. If her water comes with ice she tell the server "sorry I asked for not ice", Ill chime in with "Ill take this glass then" and smile at the server. Next glass is always no ice and the server doesnt feel like they wasted effort because the water they did bring is going to be drunk.
I don't know how things are in different parts of the US/world, but I have so little confidence in food workers now that if I had a food allergy, I'd never eat at restaurants again.
I get it, I say that about onions, because lots of things come with onions without announcing it. Want a loaded baked potato, or baked potato soup? Don't forget to tell them No Onions, even the little green ones, or I'll be picking them out with my fork.
54 Comments
NoSpotOfGround@lemmy.world · 117 pts · 285d
This makes no sense. Salads really do have nuts sometimes, whilst I've never heard of bees having steak.
Grandwolf319@sh.itjust.works · 55 pts · 285d
What if it’s honey glazed?
Iheartcheese@lemmy.world · 35 pts · 285d
Checkmate atheists
Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 10 pts · 285d
Dammit! I keep losing at chess without even playing!
Oh well, it could be worse: I could be playing chess 🤷
Frozengyro@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 285d
No this is the Pinnacle of humor. Nothing could possibly be funnier than this....
stevedice@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 285d
What about, hear me out here, what about if a man, like an old man, and not just any old man, a scientist, a old man scientist in a labcoat, what about, wait for it, what about if he were to, hold on, if he were to, here it comes, turn himself into a pickle?! Funniest shit I've ever seen.
Wolf314159@startrek.website · 6 pts · 285d
Yes, that is the subversion of expectations that makes this a joke.
RePsyche@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 285d
I call them Meat Bees, but they are a species of Yellowjacket -https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yellowjacket?wprov=sfti1
stevedice@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 285d
Fun fact: They're not eating it, they just chop bits off for their little siblings.
ExtremeUnicorn@feddit.org · 5 pts · 285d
You never had bee steak? You've been missing out!
ch00f@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 285d
with B-2 steak sauce
blug@sh.itjust.works · 64 pts · 285d
Some people are so allergic that they need different cooking stations to prepare their food and this also tells the person preparing to wear different gloves
boydster@sh.itjust.works · 48 pts · 285d
Yeah, bee allergies are serious
Mirshe@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 285d
Bingo. My coworker needed this almost everywhere that served baked goods because she had a serious cinnamon allergy. Depending on what was being made, it could be bad enough that just the scent of something baking that contained a decent amount of cinnamon, like pies, would be enough to need a couple Benadryl.
sem@piefed.blahaj.zone · 8 pts · 285d
That is a rare allergy!
Blackmist@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 285d
Also sounds non fatal, so not the kind of thing they worry about on packaging.
SomeoneSomewhere@lemmy.nz · 16 pts · 285d
Presumably you do need to tell them "no nuts because I'm allergic".
stevedice@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 285d
"Not nuts bee 'cause I'm allergic"
Waldelfe@feddit.org · 44 pts · 285d
I don't know, as someone with a nut allergy I don't get why this is supposed to be funny. This is just my everyday life. Especially salad often has nuts like walnuts or almonds as decoration so it's one of the foods where I have to be extra careful. Just like I always have to follow a coffee order with "no nuts, please", because coffee is often decorated with almonds. The tweet makes it sound like asking for no nuts on a salad is as outlandish as thinking there might be a bee in the steak, but walnuts, cashews or almonds are pretty common decorations on salads.
yermaw@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 285d
I dont think its really making fun of anyone, its just some semi-grounded absurdity.
zqps@sh.itjust.works · 16 pts · 285d
The joke can also be read as the pointe being the stupidity of the second person for exactly the reason you gave.
smh@slrpnk.net · 12 pts · 285d
Ever since I ordered a 7-cheese macaroni and cheese side dish that lovingly named each cheese and didn't mention it had chunks of bacon mixed in, I ask to be sure.
Fuck you, Applebee's.
AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 285d
Bacon, the little known eigth cheese.
Atomic@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 285d
I would assume a lot of fear isn't just from the Sallad having nuts, but that it would be cross contaminated.
I don't know where you get coffee where they decorate it with nuts, but I need to know. So I can avoid them. Not that I'm allergic. I just think that's sacrilegious.
Waldelfe@feddit.org · 3 pts · 285d
Most cafés don't, but I like to go to the smaller ones, not the big chains, and they can sometimes get very creative with almonds or hazelnut deco. It's not the majority, but I don't like to waste food so I always ask.
RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 284d
But how do you decorate liquid coffee?
pupbiru@aussie.zone · 3 pts · 284d
what kind of crazy person decorates a coffee with nuts?!
also side note: it should be illegal to put known allergens in anything without mentioning it…
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 284d
Broadly classifies as gross negligence and any business that wants to stay in business will be wise to make that info public.
But I'd rather just not end up in an ER to begin with.
LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world · -17 pts · 285d
I think people with food allergies should not go to restaurants ever. Your health & life are at stake, and you are inconveniencing everyone including yourself. Just prepare food yourself at home. I have no allergies and I don't even go to restaurants. Restaurants are excessive & unnecessary luxuries for everyone.
Phil_in_here@lemmy.ca · 8 pts · 285d
What a sanctimonious, self righteous asshole.
"I don't have allergies and even I don't go to restaurants, so people with allergies don't deserve to experience normal human life because it's inconvenient for other people. "
Get off your highly horse and get fucked by it, buddy.
mang0@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 285d
Or you can simply ask the staff about allergens, which they are legally required to disclose in any sane country.
zalgotext@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 285d
Well that certainly is an opinion
stevedice@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 285d
Why are these kinds of comments always a confession?
Waldelfe@feddit.org · 2 pts · 285d
I hardly ever go out other than drinking but going out is such a huge part of all society. I've always refused to go out with colleagues because I can't expect a team of work colleagues to always go to the one restaurant I know is save. Have you got any ideas how many fights with superiors and HR that got me in because "that's part of the work culture and team spirit" and I'm always "the complicated one"? Restaurants aren't just a luxury. As I said, I hardly ever go out, but try having any career when you're the only one who never joins for work lunches or after-work dinner. Or your friends birthday. Or the meeting of the friendgroup.
Going out to eat is deeply ingrained in our culture and it has serious effects on your social life if you refuse to do it.
piccolo@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 285d
Historically, restaurants were for people too poor to even afford their own kitchen.
sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works · 24 pts · 285d
Restaurants want people to always tell their server if they have any allergies regardless if it's in the thing is they are ordering. Not all menu items may list every single ingredient in the description and people have some uncommon allergies. Garlic is ubiquitous and it might in your salad dressing. Tell your server if you are allergic. Plus, cross contamination is a thing and chefs need to know to be mindful. Did nuts come anywhere near that salad? Let's make sure that doesn't happen.
Always say something just to be safe.
voodooattack@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 285d
If you’re not gluten-intolerant, you’ll be surprised to know how many things they put flour into. It’s so ubiquitous to the human diet you can find it in virtually everything across all kinds of cuisine.
This scenario was basically my life’s story and I had to do this every time I went to restaurant back then. Thankfully I’m no longer gluten-sensitive.
P.S. Even factory-made plain potato chips aren’t safe. (Check the labels very carefully!)
kindred@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 16 pts · 285d
And then they bring you steak with bees because the server's new and she doesn't quite understand the kitchen shorthand yet.
Hate when that happens.
jaupsinluggies@feddit.uk · 6 pts · 285d
How do I get a drink with no ice in it? Every time I say "no ice", I get ice. I even tried asking for no ice, the drink, no ice, in a glass with no ice, and STILL GOT ICE WITH IT.
LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 285d
You probably said "ice" so many times that they couldn't stop thinking about ice.
As an analogy, if I tell you not to think about an elephant, what's the first thing you think about?
MBech@feddit.dk · 1 pts · 285d
Giraffe!
falseWhite@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 285d
zqps@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 285d
Adding ice is just filling your cup with 60% water. Filling the same cup with the same drink and no ice would be less profitable because you'd wait longer to order another.
piranhaconda@mander.xyz · 3 pts · 285d
Except I get water. I just want water, with no ice
MycelialMass@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 285d
My wife has the same problem, something we do if we havent been to a place before (our regular places are goos about no ice) she will order "water no ice" and Ill get something that is not water. If her water comes with ice she tell the server "sorry I asked for not ice", Ill chime in with "Ill take this glass then" and smile at the server. Next glass is always no ice and the server doesnt feel like they wasted effort because the water they did bring is going to be drunk.
zqps@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 285d
Yes but that's the reason why adding ice is the standard, if not policy.
deltaspawn0040@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 284d
You forgot to include nuclear waste and finger nails. Rookie mistake.
salacious_coaster@infosec.pub · 4 pts · 285d
I don't know how things are in different parts of the US/world, but I have so little confidence in food workers now that if I had a food allergy, I'd never eat at restaurants again.
Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 285d
None steak with left bees
spicehoarder@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 285d
That's nuts.
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 285d
I get it, I say that about onions, because lots of things come with onions without announcing it. Want a loaded baked potato, or baked potato soup? Don't forget to tell them No Onions, even the little green ones, or I'll be picking them out with my fork.
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 284d
Her, at the funeral: "He needs his glasses! He can't see without his glasses!"
robocall@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 284d
I'll have the pasta, no penicillin please
LORDSMEGMA@sh.itjust.works · 0 pts · 285d
I'm allergic to banana boat sunscreen, I should tell waiters not to put it in my food
WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 285d
How many times did you eat that sunscreen and think your symptoms were from something else before you realized the real cause?