Disagrulement

420 points · 47 comments · view on lemmy.world

47 Comments

xkbx@startrek.website · 82 pts · 123d (2 replies)

I recommend practicing first in the shower. It doesn’t matter if you’re firing a pea shooter or a bazooka, the aim is not a gift innate to all

GorGor@startrek.website · 70 pts · 123d

truth. when a girl gets their chance to write their name they stop paying attention to things like dont point it at my fucking shoe.

LodeMike@lemmy.today · 11 pts · 123d

Even across two men, probably.

velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 72 pts · 123d (23 replies)

I've never realized I want to do this.

Brb.

dkppunk@piefed.social · 32 pts · 123d (4 replies)

Have done. Is fun.

Also, a She Wee or similar device is a decent alternative for vulva having folks to pee standing up.

velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 26 pts · 123d (3 replies)

I'm seriously going to ask my husband if I can when I get home lol

The She Wee!! What an amazing tool!

dkppunk@piefed.social · 14 pts · 123d

lol it’s been like 20 years since I did that. I hope your husband gets a good chuckle at it too.

She Wees are great for traveling and hiking!

Cort@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 123d

Just follow him to the bathroom, odds are pretty decent that he'll ask if you wanna hold it for him.

pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 5 pts · 122d

Keep us updated please

sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz · 28 pts · 123d (16 replies)

Worse they can say is no, right?

MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works · 27 pts · 123d (1 reply)

They could get scared and helicopter that shit all over the room and you. Like a Jackson Pollock painting.

sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz · 12 pts · 123d

I expect no less account of experience from MeatPilot, themself

NOT_RICK@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 123d (8 replies)

I dunno what man is saying no to their partner grabbing onto their junk

velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 44 pts · 123d (4 replies)

From what I've seen, boners and trying to piss don't play well together lol

NOT_RICK@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 123d (3 replies)

They don’t. I will sometimes have to sit down and lean over to get mine aimed safely into the bowl when I wake up with a rager.

velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 21 pts · 123d

Another lie pushed by Big Porn smh

I was expecting to be covered in a golden shower, not an intermittent stream because he kept getting hard again hahaha

NKBTN@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 122d

A couple of times I've grabbed an empty toilet roll tube, put my bell-in, and tilted the tube down 45 degrees to funnel the wee into the bowl. It works, but the tube collapses toward the end

M137@lemmy.world · -5 pts · 123d

You should always sit down, for yourself and others. This should be something all men do.

sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz · 12 pts · 123d (1 reply)

Being 100% tmi real, in my experience people are poor judges of pressure and sensation on other bodies. I generally don't let my partners just go for it but maybe I'm an asshole

deacon@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 123d

Hey it’s your junk. Gotta have boundaries.

DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 123d

I agree. Maybe she's a bad aim. Still worth it.

fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 10 pts · 123d (2 replies)

I think worst case you end up with a piss covered wall.

sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 123d (1 reply)

Hey. Some times you have to trust

birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 122d

"Trust me Jarvis, holding their dick to pee is CRITICAL to the plot."

Digit@lemmy.wtf · 8 pts · 122d (1 reply)

No.

There are far far worse.

We're getting a divorce.

I'm calling the police.

Wait until you mother hears what you just asked.

etc.

;D

[If you think that's lame... I pulled my punch. Scared of saying the more monstrous things that could be said.]

sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 122d

🫂

not your fault man. I'll be here for you ✊️😔

QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 122d

update?

DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works · 56 pts · 123d

Yeah, someone said no when a woman asked to touch their penis. Totally realistic.

Yes, you can hold it when I pee. Yes, you can hold it while I'm making sandwiches. Yes, you can hold it while we're on the VelociCoaster at Islands of Adventure...

Godric@lemmy.world · 35 pts · 123d (9 replies)

Let an ex do that once, she did not know how to aim :(

AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 123d (8 replies)

Hope you were at her place

Godric@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 122d (7 replies)

Hope someone with a less loathsome names asks me that!

Digit@lemmy.wtf · 15 pts · 122d (1 reply)

Were you at her place?

Godric@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 122d

I wish, and it was early college, so I was sharing the bathroom with 3 other dudes. Had to fully clean the barely-passable but disgusting toilet, a 2 foot block around it, and the wall!

I've heard the shower is the best place to try this particular maneuver, and wholeheartedly agree

LostCarcosan@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 122d

Loathsome name? I never heard anything bad about anyone named Schmitler!

AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 122d (3 replies)

Damn I forgot I should use my government name on the internet which is very serious

Godric@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 122d (2 replies)

OK, Adolf.

AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 122d (1 reply)

It's a username on a website get over it

Godric@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 122d

OK, Adolf.

miked@piefed.social · 22 pts · 123d

It was her place so I said yes. I didn't care where it went. She did just fine

smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works · 14 pts · 123d (2 replies)

Why "no"? Or am I just starved for penis attention?

TootSweet@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 123d (1 reply)

If there's a "babe" holding it, I'm not going to be able to pee.

Signtist@bookwyr.me · 12 pts · 123d

I can't even pee when someone else is in the same public restroom. I can't imagine trying to do it while someone's actively touching it.

BagOfHeavyStones@piefed.social · 6 pts · 123d

And to contact the dead you need a Weeja board.

I_am_10_squirrels@beehaw.org · 6 pts · 123d (3 replies)

I have a penis. I started sitting down to pee about 15 years ago. It's much cleaner, eliminates the splash ring issue. I highly recommend it.

NKBTN@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 122d

At home, sure. Am less inclined in public toilets

RamenJunkie@midwest.social · 0 pts · 122d (1 reply)

Also touching a dick is totally gay, screw that.

I_am_10_squirrels@beehaw.org · 4 pts · 122d

I've spent a lifetime touching my dick and can confirm it made me totally gay. Well, bi.