Taught mine to roll a joint, then he took all my weed and sold it, came back acting like he had no idea what happened and was all like idk I just found this new Apple Watch.
I'll do all of that for free. Just the cost of booze and smokes. I too am not picky about brand and will drink most anything. (I'm ok at pickpocketing)
Have you SEEN the price of whisky these days? The cost of getting that little fucker drunk and lightfingered is negligible, even if he smokes like a chimney
20 Comments
rockerface@lemmy.cafe · 24 pts · 13d
Finally, a healthy and eco-friendly alternative to genAI girlfriend!
gigastasio@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 13d
Taught mine to roll a joint, then he took all my weed and sold it, came back acting like he had no idea what happened and was all like idk I just found this new Apple Watch.
sam_the_tech@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 13d
Unfortunately, you cannot bring the smoking drinking monkey indoors at most establishments these days
Godric@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 13d
Man, Europe sounds miserable these days!
CapuccinoCoretto@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 13d
Never drink alone. You aren't alone in a bar. This is a Pandemic era innovation in monkeybusiness.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 13d
You try and keep the smoking drinking money outside without me, I'll be inside drinking and smoking with my monkey
Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 13d
If it doesn't smoke is it really a drinking buddy?
CapuccinoCoretto@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 13d
$14.99?!?
I'll do all of that for free. Just the cost of booze and smokes. I too am not picky about brand and will drink most anything. (I'm ok at pickpocketing)
BurnedDonutHole@ani.social · 4 pts · 13d
Yeah but you're not a monkey are you? If I wanted to drink with humans I would have done it friends or strangers at a bar.
CapuccinoCoretto@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 12d
More of an ape than a monkey, but I'm told I'm fun at parties.
Godric@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 13d
Have you SEEN the price of whisky these days? The cost of getting that little fucker drunk and lightfingered is negligible, even if he smokes like a chimney
CapuccinoCoretto@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 13d
That's why I agreed to do it for free.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 13d
Can I order a smoking monkey? I don't drink much anymore
Godric@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 13d
Well, they do drink no matter what, but they dont need much!
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 12d
that monkey better stay the hell out of my rum!
Dispassionate@quokk.au · 7 pts · 13d
The only friend I’ve ever wanted.
onlyhalfminotaur@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 13d
Can't wait to eat that monkey
PattyMcB@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 13d
What if I don't want to share my liquor?
Godric@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 13d
Mibkeys need like a shot of whisky to get hammered you stingy bastard! I'd call you a caveman but they at least would throw a dog a bone
PattyMcB@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 13d
Are you drunk now? If so... MY MAN!
And no... Joey doesn't share booze