Finally, a real name for your penis

263 points · 104 comments · view on lemmy.world

104 Comments

snek_boi@lemmy.ml · 66 pts · 128d

Nice try, FBI (which would be “Fun Hard Knob”) or CIA (which would be “Big Bear Wand”)

Kenny2999@lemmy.world · 48 pts · 128d (2 replies)

I got fucking pussy meat. What the fuck.

felixwhynot@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 128d

OOF! Perhaps the Pussy Pounder would suit you better

Grabthar@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 128d

They killed Kenny! Those bastards!

KindnessIsPunk@lemmy.ca · 30 pts · 128d

Pleasure Killer

Surp@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 128d (1 reply)

nice try government to figure out the first letter of my first and last name

kbobabob@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 127d

There will be another one of these asking for the third letter or something soon.

FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 128d

Man Injector....

Asafum@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 128d

Purple beef... I think I should see a doctor...

texture@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 128d

nice try fbi, but i dont return your calls for a reason

Crackhappy@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 128d

Say hello to my mighty Man Punch.

wizzor@sopuli.xyz · 11 pts · 128d (4 replies)

Some funny ones there.

Like Bear Killer.

Or Fun Destroyer.

Johandea@feddit.nu · 5 pts · 128d (1 reply)

I like Ugly Schlong

Gumus@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 127d

(Q _ Q)

yakko@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 128d (1 reply)

I wish I got Monster Meat 🤣

wizzor@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 128d

I keep wondering... Just what happened with that bear? How did you kill a bear with your... Bear killer.

Lumidaub@feddit.org · 11 pts · 128d (2 replies)

Power Steak.🎉🎉🎉

Davel23@fedia.io · 6 pts · 128d

Holy shit, that made me laugh harder than I have in a long time.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 128d

roserose56@lemmy.zip · 8 pts · 127d (1 reply)

Nice try, but I wont fall for it.
He is farming data of you. You give the initials, he/she/they/it goes guessing you name lol.

yermaw@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 127d

Whats your PORNSTAR NAME? The street you grew up on + the name of your first pet GO

Eczpurt@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 128d

Monster Meat, excellent

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 128d (1 reply)

i'm not using my name, i'm just picking from the list and Fuck Killer is quite possibly the worst name for a dangle i've ever heard.

PyroNeurosis@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 5 pts · 127d

Skin Killer. If your partner's still around after that intoduction, maybe you shouldn't be.

snoons@lemmy.ca · 8 pts · 128d

SCHLONG HARD PLEASURE TOOL UNIT

Monument@piefed.world · 7 pts · 128d (1 reply)

They’ve done Paul Newman dirty.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 128d

it's very important that we not damage paul newman

pheelicks@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 127d

Moon Moon ... oh no wait, wrong thread.

Rentlar@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 128d

Danny DeVito would say, "Oh, whoops! I dropped my Monster Condom that I use for my Girthy Injector" (since Fun Tool doesn't sound as silly)

wuffah@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 128d

Ladies, meet Mr. Salami. 😎

AlexLost@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 127d

Nice try FBI. Your not getting my initials!

zout@fedia.io · 6 pts · 128d (2 replies)

Giant Sword. Not very original.

fraksken@infosec.pub · 5 pts · 128d (1 reply)

Better than dangling sword. Trust me.

zout@fedia.io · 2 pts · 128d

I just realised my brother is Long Sword, so my Giant Sword is definitely better now!

pleb_maximus@piefed.zip · 6 pts · 128d

Giant Salami

Eh, could be worse.

BurgerBaron@piefed.social · 5 pts · 128d

Monster Stick

snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 128d

Girthy Beef

Goun@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 128d

Purple Machine

Billy_fuccboi@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 128d

Man meat. Very generic.

Dadifer@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 128d

Your mom's gag

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 5 pts · 128d (1 reply)

What a coincidence; Dangling Killer is also my serial killer alias.

YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 127d

Radio frequency?

OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 128d

Girthy Punch. Makes my tiny penis sound massive 😎

RattlerSix@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 128d

Remember, it's ok to name your penis but it's not ok to name the fella's penis next to you at the urinal.

https://youtu.be/YstBl9xzz34

fun_times@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 128d

Eric Cartman - Pleasure Destroyer.

Fransisco Franco - Fun-killer.

Victor von Doom - Hulk Injector (you do you, Doctor).

FrankFrankson@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 128d

Peter Parker's penis is called Pussy Beef

Gonzako@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 128d

Hey gurl want some of this MONSTER BEEF?

StarsongDusk@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 128d (1 reply)

Dangling Destroyer

ROFLMAO.

ickplant@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 128d

Just don’t do the helicopter. You’ll kill us all!

Manticore@lemmy.nz · 3 pts · 127d

I'm just enjoying every version of '[Word] Punch'.

'They call me MISTER Punch!

'Yeah babe do you like my bear punch'

If I go to a house party and they've got Purple Punch then I'm leaving

kbobabob@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 127d

Poor Quentin Tarantino

knotRyder@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 127d

Giant tool, well at least it's not my personality

davidagain@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 127d (5 replies)

For my username(s): GirthyWand. Alternatively: Sex knob | Giant hammer.

Amusingly, my wife's maiden name was Love Flute, which suits her, and now she's Love Pole. Of course I'm not going to tell her either of these names.

_g_be@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d (2 replies)

"sex knob: giant hammer" sounds like a JJK technique

davidagain@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 126d (1 reply)

I'm not sure I should google that.

GBE: Monster Hard Snake

_g_be@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 126d

JJK is an anime, they have names for their special moves that usually have the form "Domain Expansion: {adjective} {noun}"

Bubs12@lemmy.cafe · 1 pts · 126d (1 reply)

Did your wife change her last name to something that is not your last name?

davidagain@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 126d

My surname is not really "again".

assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 128d

Giant injector. False advertising tbh

Whereismyholodeck@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 128d

Paul Smith is about to go on a journey of self discovery

generic_computers@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 128d

Pleasure Meat

asudox@lemmy.asudox.dev · 3 pts · 128d

Purple Punch??

CapOnBackwards@fedinsfw.app · 3 pts · 128d
[ removed ]
tino@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 127d

I am Skin tube. My wife would be Monster Destroyer. It's unfair

GreenKnight23@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 128d

Pleasure Killer

fair enough. ambiguous enough it could go either way. I'm satisfied (unlike the women I have dated).

harrison_fnord@reddthat.com · 2 pts · 127d

Power Killer.

MissingGhost@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 126d

Wait am I am Lemmy or on Facebook?

genuineparts@infosec.pub · 2 pts · 128d

Hard Sausage... does not really sound all that appealing

Aralakh@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 127d

Babe, the new MMORPG name generator dropped!

Pman@lemmy.org · 2 pts · 128d

Hopefully nobody has the initials E. F. Pleasure Killer is not great.

fartographer@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 128d

Candyman had a Skin Unit

18107@aussie.zone · 2 pts · 128d (1 reply)

YI -> Iron Knob

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 128d

i think i saw that kung fu movie

Jerb322@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 128d

Man sword

Kintarian@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d

George

Fierro@piefed.social · 2 pts · 128d

Somebody has a fuck beef

MousePotatoDoesStuff@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d

idk, sounds like false advertising in my case :P

Noite_Etion@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d (1 reply)

Purple killer... Not a fan of the name tbh

imjustmsk@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 127d

are you Mason Fischer? Max Fuller? Miles Fletcher?Milo Flynn?   Who are you M. F? 

cockmushroom@reddthat.com · 2 pts · 128d

Love Meal

Kinda like a censored version of my username

RedAggroBest@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 126d (1 reply)

I don't really wanna be the Skin Destoryer

ickplant@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 126d

Understandable.

QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 126d

what the hell man :(

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 126d

Accurate...

Griffus@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 128d

Love punch

TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 127d

Pussy salami

grinka@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 128d

Fuck Unit

AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 128d

Hard killer? Doesnt roll off the tounge i would want it to(pun intended)

hungrythirstyhorny@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d

long sausage

SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 127d

... Skin Unit. Gross!

Samskara@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 127d

🧍‍♂️ MAN SWORD 🗡️

snausagesinablanket@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d

One Hundred Percent All Beef Thermometer.

outlawcarl@fedinsfw.app · 2 pts · 127d

Big pole......

sploder@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d
[ removed ]
666dollarfootlong@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 128d

Bear sausage. I guess thats nice and affirming, thanks!

join@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 128d

frodo with his fun sword and samwise with his giant punch on their way to destroy the ring

trslim@pawb.social · 2 pts · 128d

yes i am Man Steak and my husband is Mister Steak.

GirthBrooksPLO@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d (2 replies)

What do YOU think mine is?

davidagain@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 127d

Well, according to the chart and your username, it's Monster Sword Pussy Sex Machine.

basxto@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 127d

monster sword

Thteven@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 127d

Love Injector. How derivative.

dukatos@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 127d

Hulk flute

basxto@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 127d (1 reply)

But I wanna call it the puking dildo

ickplant@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 126d

Be the change you want to see in the world!

emmanuelw@jlai.lu · 2 pts · 128d

Pleasure Steak

chronicledmonocle@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 128d

Love Beef

Accurate