Except this is entirely on the spider's terms. Land is given but there's no quota, no tax. The spider may come and go as he pleases and only needs to catch enough pests to feed himself.

SirSamuel@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 4h (5 replies)

You've considered a capitalist solution, but have you considered

Restorative justice: the spider is a trespasser, but will likely not find enough prey to survive. Capture the spider and relocate it to a suitable habitat where it can thrive. Check on it occasionally to ensure it is doing well

Libertarian anarchism: leave it be. It will die, survive, or thrive on its own terms

Authoritarianism: tell the spider if it doesn't remove itself it will be arrested, start ordering it to get on the ground, fire 13 rounds at it, preferably missing all shots but hitting a nearby toddler. Institute martial law against the "foreign threat", citing the recent death of a toddler

chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 4h (3 replies)

House spiders generally don’t survive outdoors. They’re cave-dwelling species and they seek out indoor spaces by instinct.

SirSamuel@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 3h (2 replies)

This is a very good point. In rebuttal

A. I did say "a suitable habitat"

B. I was very clearly shitposting

chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 3h (1 reply)

Sure, though my comment wasn’t strictly a rebuttal to yours. It was as much an FYI to anyone who stumbled across our comments and has relocated spiders outside out of a desire to save them.

SirSamuel@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1h

I'm glad you posted your original comment. I tend to be pretty tongue-in-cheek, both online and IRL. Sorry if it comes off as abrasive, in my mind it's all in good fun. Love you and hope you have a fantastic day <3

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 3h

SirSamuel, you enlightened bastard! You don't know how much I needed this laugh.

Also, I decided to go the pre-Marxist socialist route: the spider is allowed to stay and to contribute according to its abilities and shall be compensated according to its contributions in the pest elimination field.

Digit@lemmy.today · 20 pts · 5h (1 reply)

impose rent?

but...

it's already working for you, setting up traps for flies.

bloody capitalists... always short-sightedly, myopically, trying to maximise wealth extraction.

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 6 pts · 3h

ExtremeDullard@piefed.social · 16 pts · 6h (1 reply)

Threaten it to call immigration if it doesn't pay up.

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 2h

That's... low. Even for me. xD

alt_xa_23@midwest.social · 10 pts · 2h (3 replies)

Looks like you found yourself a network debugger

Agent641@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 48m

I was going to say web admin but yours is good too.

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 2h

OKAY. I thought all the funny responses were already exhausted xD <3

PattyMcB@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1h

Came here to say this. Thank you for making my job easier!

MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 2h (1 reply)

It gets to keep 25% of the bugs he catches. You get to eat the other 75%.

Any changes to the web will void it's deposit and you get to eat 500 of it's bugs to repair any damage.

Utilities are not included. There will be a 5 bug charge for each droplet of water it drinks from the faucet. Even though it lives near WiFi, there is a hookup fee and monthly cost of 25 bugs.

If it is late on monthly bug payments for more that 1-week. You get to eat it's web and all the bugs. The spider will be taken outside on a paper towel or in a cup and left on the nearest leaf.

Implement those and you'll eat like a king!

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 2h

I died xD

But...

I'm affraid he'll try to circumvent my espionage with some spidey encryption... No idea how to counter that. :/

ryannathans@aussie.zone · 9 pts · 5h (1 reply)

Keeping the computer bugs at bay

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 3h

True. Fully automated out of the box too! Like, no scripting, no broken config files, whathaveyou.

Monument@piefed.world · 7 pts · 6h (1 reply)

She’s just trying to crawl the web!

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 2h

I'm afraid of what she might scrape while crawling.

eta@feddit.org · 6 pts · 6h (2 replies)

Similar to "bug" you can establish "spider" as a new computer term for things that infest a running system. Then you do conference talks, write books about it and keep all the earnings you get from doing that. The spider can't sue you for a share of that if it doesn't also pay you rent.

anton@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 6h

A spider is something you release into your system to catch bugs.
For a small fee of 1000$/h I will tell your company how.

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 2h

Yeah I'm with the other commenter on this one. Spiders are deployed against bugs. I will leave her alone to dwell.

But seriously though... WHERE IS SHE?! xD

Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 6 pts · 6h (1 reply)

What do you mean? It is already working hard to get rid of all the flies in there.

You sound more like a capitalist CEO. Are you going to take its healthcare away as well?

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 3h

pupbiru@aussie.zone · 6 pts · 2h (2 replies)

rent? it’s keeping your house pest free… you owe it money

(also obligatory that’s not a spider THIS is a spider from australia)

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 2h

True... I don't know how to pay her though. PayPal? Ko-Fi?

palordrolap@fedia.io · 1 pts · 1h

The problem with the implicit size comparison in the Crocodile Dundee reference is that Australian spider size is inversely proportional to their actual danger.

blinfabian@feddit.nl · 5 pts · 5h (1 reply)

am i crazy or is there no spider in this photo??

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 5h

No, you are not crazy. Spider web is all there is. - akunohana 2026

_chris@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 5h (1 reply)

Spider notwithstanding, looks like you’ve made an excellent partial faraday cage for your WiFi 😂

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 5h

Well, the wavelength of 5GHz is 5 6 cm. The smaller gaps between the bars on the individual "shelves" are 2.6 cm and the bigger gaps are 14 cm. While the smaller gaps could disrupt the waves, the bigger gaps, at which the antennas are pointed, do not.

TWeaK@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 6h (1 reply)

They're already working hard ensuring your local network web is free from bugs.

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 3h

True. I guess I can show it some leniency.

Grass@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 1h

Its already a work in place of rent situation. I have tenants with similar contract in my kitchen window, my shower ceiling, the storage/work room window, and the one that doesn't follow the rules in the front entrance arch who is likely to be evicted.

pulsewidth@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 6h (1 reply)

Considering household insects like cockroaches often look for warm, dry locations to lay their oothecas (egg capsules), and have been known to get fried and damage equipment while doing so - I'd say you actually might have a useful symbiotic pal there, protecting your gear (do I see an MT-6000? Great gateway).

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 2h

You're absolutely right! The spider stays!

The rack goes:
The ISP's ONT (in the hallway, not visible here) ---> a TP-link SG105E swtich:

---> a VPN router (RPi4 + OpenWRT + Mullvad) ---> an Asus RT-AX58U AX3000 router (in access point mode, 2.4GHz turned off) ---> most appliances at home
---> a plain router (RPi4 + OpenWRT) ---> an Asus RT-AX58U AX3000 version 2 router (in access point mode, 2.4GHz turned off) ---> Tor bridge (the white device in the picture, a RPi 5) + occasionally backup for internet access

aarch0x40@piefed.social · 2 pts · 6h (1 reply)

You’re seriously considering charging the spider rent after he provides you an excellent web connection without asking you for so much as a dime?! How dare you, sir?! How very dare you!!

akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 3h

I have made a fool of myself. You are absolutely right! I'll do some ping, traceroute and nslookup and get back to you! :)