When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
when life gives you too many lemons, make a lemonade factory. when the market is oversaturated with lemons and nobody wants your lemonade, pass laws forcing the poor's to buy your lemonade. when socialist America elects a libtard commie, bribe him.
when the countrie is destitute and starving because they have nothing to eat, save money on lemonade by selling lemons.
We've got lemonade, strawbribery lemonade, grape lemonade, all-the-wrong-mango-to-jail lemonade, and pardon-me-how-could-this-insurraspberry-only-have-69-calories.
Bring your "got out of jail free" card or wear any red hat for an extra 14% off your 88th purchase. ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)
NOW SERVING BLACKS
Last year, in Sapporo, I went to a bar that serves unlimited lemon highball (i.e. hard liquor) out of a tap. The whole bar is lemon-themed. It was very cheap, like $10 for 90 minutes of all-you-can-drink lemon highball or something like that. Anyway, I'm not a heavy drinker by any means, but dear god, we got blasted. I don't think I can look at a lemon again without feeling mildly nauseous.
"When life gives you lemons, donât make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I donât want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see lifeâs manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? Iâm the man whoâs gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! Iâm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!â
So I just found out, that APPERENTLY, a LEMON, isn't naturally occurring, and is a hybrid by CROSSBREEDING a BITTER ORANGE with a CITRON! WHICH MEANS: LIFE NEVER GAVE US LEMONS! WE INVENTED THEM ALL BY OURSELVES!!
What if the Lemons falling on us in this situation are all the billionaires doing exactly what you're saying - but exclusively with their made up bullshit lemons? Like illegal aliens, the "radical" left, and corporate taxes.
Because I'd love to turn that into lemonade, but the market is now so saturated in their fake outrage lemon bullshit to the point we no longer even agree on what lemonade is supposed to taste like.
He is making lemon juice. Seems like somebody else got lemons and has hired workers to squeeze the lemons for the lemonade. The process is very inefficient so the profit margins must be high.
This is a capitalist success story. It's always possible to find a way to suppress others if you have resources.
The moral is that not everybody gets lemons. Don't be sad, abuse them.
49 Comments
stupidcasey@lemmy.world · 102 pts · 1y
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. when life gives you too many lemons, make a lemonade factory. when the market is oversaturated with lemons and nobody wants your lemonade, pass laws forcing the poor's to buy your lemonade. when socialist America elects a libtard commie, bribe him. when the countrie is destitute and starving because they have nothing to eat, save money on lemonade by selling lemons.
name_NULL111653@pawb.social · 19 pts · 1y
This is so obviously satire, who tf be downvoting?
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1y
She sells sea shells on the sea shore, but the value of these shells will fall...
ruuster13@lemmy.zip · 11 pts · 1y
We've got lemonade, strawbribery lemonade, grape lemonade, all-the-wrong-mango-to-jail lemonade, and pardon-me-how-could-this-insurraspberry-only-have-69-calories. Bring your "got out of jail free" card or wear any red hat for an extra 14% off your 88th purchase. ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) NOW SERVING BLACKS
Fucking hell you guys.
jsomae@lemmy.ml · 39 pts · 1y
Last year, in Sapporo, I went to a bar that serves unlimited lemon highball (i.e. hard liquor) out of a tap. The whole bar is lemon-themed. It was very cheap, like $10 for 90 minutes of all-you-can-drink lemon highball or something like that. Anyway, I'm not a heavy drinker by any means, but dear god, we got blasted. I don't think I can look at a lemon again without feeling mildly nauseous.
zalgotext@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 1y
That sounds incredible
jsomae@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 1y
we still remember it as "lemon night"
modus@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
Would you go as far as to say it was a party?
dual_sport_dork@lemmy.world · 32 pts · 1y
Say the line, Cave!
somerandomperson@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 42 pts · 1y
"When life gives you lemons, donât make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I donât want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see lifeâs manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? Iâm the man whoâs gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! Iâm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!â
frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 1y
You're doing Glados' work. For science. You monster.
glitchdx@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 1y
So I just found out, that APPERENTLY, a LEMON, isn't naturally occurring, and is a hybrid by CROSSBREEDING a BITTER ORANGE with a CITRON! WHICH MEANS: LIFE NEVER GAVE US LEMONS! WE INVENTED THEM ALL BY OURSELVES!!
Bogasse@lemmy.ml · 25 pts · 1y
That's somehow the 3rd "life gives you lemon" comics I see this week.
Obligatory link to David Revoy's awesome work : https://framapiaf.org/@davidrevoy/114943045552334866
ThatGuy46475@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 1y
âWhen life hands you lemons, make lemonade? No. First you roll out a multi-media campaign to convince people lemons are incredibly scarce, which only works if you stockpile lemons, control the supply, then a media blitz. Lemon is the only way to say âI love you,â the must-have accessory for engagements or anniversaries. Roses are out, lemons are in. Billboards that say she wonât have sex with you unless you got lemons. You cut De Beers in on it. Limited edition lemon bracelets, yellow diamonds called lemon drops. You get Apple to call their new operating system OS-LemĂłn. A little accent over the âo.â You charge 40% more for organic lemons, 50% more for conflict-free lemons. You pack the Capitol with lemon lobbyists, you get a Kardashian to suck a lemon wedge in a leaked sex tape. TimotheĂ© Chalamet wears lemon shoes at Cannes. Get a hashtag campaign. Something isnât âcoolâ or âtightâ or âawesome,â no, itâs âlemon.â âDid you see that movie? Did you see that concert? It was effing lemon.â Billie Eilish, âOMG, hashtag⊠lemon.â You get Dr. Oz to recommend four lemons a day and a lemon suppository supplement to get rid of toxins âcause thereâs nothing scarier than toxins. Then you patent the seeds. You write a line of genetic code that makes the lemons look just a little more like tits⊠and you get a gene patent for the tit-lemon DNA sequence, you cross-pollinate⊠you get those seeds circulating in the wild, and then you sue the farmer for patent infringement when that genetic code shows up on their land. Sit back, rake in the millions, and then, when youâre done, and youâve sold your lem-pire for a few billion dollars, then, and only then, you make some fucking lemonade."
bradorsomething@ttrpg.network · 5 pts · 1y
What if life give you Climate Change?
plyth@feddit.org · 3 pts · 1y
You build a construction business to repair destroyed infrastructure and you invest in corn storage for years of bad harvests.
dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 1y
Die. :/
EightBitBlood@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
What if the Lemons falling on us in this situation are all the billionaires doing exactly what you're saying - but exclusively with their made up bullshit lemons? Like illegal aliens, the "radical" left, and corporate taxes.
Because I'd love to turn that into lemonade, but the market is now so saturated in their fake outrage lemon bullshit to the point we no longer even agree on what lemonade is supposed to taste like.
Thavron@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 1y
I read this in the voice of Cave Johnson.
sol6_vi@lmmy.retrowaifu.io · 2 pts · 1y
Me too!
renrenPDX@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 1y
Watch out for lemon stealing whores.
ReasonablePea@sh.itjust.works · -4 pts · 1y
Lol who hurt you?
ayyy@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 1y
(Whooooosh, but also donât look it up.)
some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
We do have a couple lemon stealing whores in this community
renrenPDX@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y
Sorry, I should have used some sort of tag.
Itâs a reference to a 2017 YT vid and since become a meme.
lime@feddit.nu · 2 pts · 1y
you sure it was youtube? because that's literally a porno. same energy as "this isn't a beach, this is a bathtub!"
renrenPDX@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
It very well could be đ€Ł the beginning is definitely memes on YT
otacon239@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1y
LEMONS?!
null@lemmy.nullspace.lol · 4 pts · 1y
I originally read the artist name as Will Sasso. I miss Vine.
acockworkorange@mander.xyz · 1 pts · 1y
Thank you.
jewbacca117@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y
kamenlady@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1y
WanderWisley@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 1y
Unless life gives you water and sugar too your lemonade is gonna really suck.
DemBoSain@midwest.social · 10 pts · 1y
He's been squeezing the lemons, drinking the juice, and filling the bottles with piss.
yggstyle@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
He works at Amazon?!
someguy3@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y
When god gives you lemons, you find a new god.
Retreaux@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1y
ininewcrow@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 1y
At this point in history, we have enough lemons in the world that could generate critical mass and collapse into a black hole.
tetris11@feddit.uk · 5 pts · 1y
when life is a lemon, suck on it
Psaldorn@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 1y
My life arrived pre-sucked.
tetris11@feddit.uk · 4 pts · 1y
when life sucks, eat a lemon. Eat it
kamenlady@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1y
Imma try making some lemonade first.
Then i have something to drink, when i eat lemons.
humorlessrepost@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1y
Thatâs a Nemco 55850. If he can afford a $500 citrus juicer, his life is just fine.
ThePJN@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 1y
One must imagine the Minute Maid happy.
plyth@feddit.org · 2 pts · 1y
He is making lemon juice. Seems like somebody else got lemons and has hired workers to squeeze the lemons for the lemonade. The process is very inefficient so the profit margins must be high.
This is a capitalist success story. It's always possible to find a way to suppress others if you have resources.
The moral is that not everybody gets lemons. Don't be sad, abuse them.
SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org · 2 pts · 1y
"Life is like a penis most people don't know it, but most people suck so they usually blow it." - Great Philosopher Jimmy Pop
sol6_vi@lmmy.retrowaifu.io · 2 pts · 1y
How To Basic
Mike_Hunt@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 1y
Sell the lemons and call it âlife is giving you lemonsâ
pyre@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
you're supposed to drink the lemonade, dummy.
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 1y
When God gives you lemons you FIND A NEW GOD!
homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1y
Accurate