I wonder what game they're trying to play

711 points · 106 comments · view on lemmy.world

106 Comments

Passerby6497@lemmy.world · 186 pts · 315d (13 replies)

'please, Internet, tell me how to turn my game controller into a vibrator'

Kids these days..... Back in my day, we just turned on FF8 and spammed summons

Speculater@lemmy.world · 72 pts · 315d (7 replies)

Oh God, I literally quit the game because the summons were so absurd. I feel I spent more time watching the same animations than I did playing the game.

funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 315d (3 replies)

I imagine that's a design consideration.- same with Ultima and other big spells. You get a big payoff after a big wind-up. It's trying to telegraph that if you want speed you should build your party differently using junctions

fracture@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 315d (1 reply)

game designers be like: NO! REBUILD YOUR PARTY IF YOU DON'T LIKE SUMMON ANIMATIONS! WE WILL NOT PUT A SKIP BUTTON IN!!!!

funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 315d

honestly I don't hate it as a decision. there should be rewards for using all the mechanics well

Sc00ter@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 315d

I forget which game, but it had two different durations of summon/cast. The first time was always the long one, then youd regularly get the short one, youd randomly "crit" and get the long one, which did more damage.

Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 5 pts · 315d

At least there was button tapping to power up so there was SOMETHING to do during the forever animations

salacious_coaster@infosec.pub · 5 pts · 315d

I was obsessed with that game when it came out. Just played it again, and it's actually pretty bad. Even without using summons at all, and with emulator fast-forward on most of the time, it's almost unbearably slow and tedious.

DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 1 pts · 315d

?

Bro you spammed limit breaks in that game, tell your kid self to git gud

FF7 was the unrelenting Summon Fest once you got mimic and w-summon

ButteryMonkey@piefed.social · 37 pts · 315d

You missed out on the tomb raider demo disc that came with PlayStation magazine (probably issue 73 based on the fact I have it and I wasn’t subscribed very long while demo discs were a thing) Same era.

If you went for a swim in the pool, and swam into the side, you’d not only get a constant intense vibration, you’d also get to see her swimming motion, and I don’t think it had breath mechanics yet (or at least she wouldn’t die in the demo zone), so you could take your time. Win win.

There was also a vibration test in the menu if you just wanted no frills.

4am@lemmy.zip · 14 pts · 315d (1 reply)

We played Rez with the Trance Vibrator

Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 315d

I still have Rez and the official trance vibrator!

SlartyBartFast@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 315d

Oooooh Shiva, you can be my ice queen any day

lightnsfw@reddthat.com · 4 pts · 315d

Kids these days… Back in my day, we just turned on FF8 and spammed summons

pre-teen me spamming Shiva.

peoplebeproblems@midwest.social · 176 pts · 315d (1 reply)

So this brings up a funny story.

IDK when, but I was on a trip, thinking about my ex wife(then girlfriend at the time) with my parents somewhere and they had these vibrating back massager things. Usually they're like 4 wooden balls on sticks attached to a wooden handle. I knew how much my ex loved it. Anyway I thought "dude fucking brilliant" and I bought it for her and my parents were like: "Uh, ok? You sure she's going to like that?" "I'm like are you kidding me? The number of times I have to get sore hands from giving her a back massage is incredible!" Oh, I'm like 15 at the time.

Well, I gift it to her, and with the smallest hint of embarrassment says she absolutely loves it. That night she thanks me again, saying it made things so much easier, in kind of a flirty tone. I completely miss all social cues always so this didn't register. Sometime later I come over and she wants one of the back rubs, and I'm like "hey, grab that tool I got!"

She responds with "I'm not in the mood for that, besides it's out of batteries."

I thought I was going to fold into myself. "How many back rubs have you given yourself?" "Oh, like none. Just the fun stuff." The heaviest levels of cringe hit, knowing how many people saw me buying this for my girlfriend completely oblivious to what it would be used for.

primrosepathspeedrun@anarchist.nexus · 91 pts · 315d

Getting your gf a vibrator is adorable.

ShellMonkey@piefed.socdojo.com · 81 pts · 315d

Don't know about on PlayStation but: https://borderlands.fandom.com/wiki/Good_Touch

An unlisted effect occurs with game controllers using vibrate that breaks the fourth wall. While the character wields the gun, the controller will vibrate continuously even when not firing.

jagermo@feddit.org · 59 pts · 315d (3 replies)

Just use Buttplug.io

snooggums@piefed.world · 57 pts · 315d (1 reply)

We were vibe coding before it was cool.

ramble81@lemmy.zip · 23 pts · 315d

The only acceptable form of vibe coding

wizzor@sopuli.xyz · 12 pts · 315d

I... Ok that's just impressive.

salacious_coaster@infosec.pub · 53 pts · 315d (11 replies)

I am once again asking you all to just buy proper sex toys and lube.

Takashiro@lemmy.today · 31 pts · 315d

I agree , but in these cases it's probably a kid or teenager trying to make do with what they have.

RedFrank24@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 315d

Assuming they're a teenager, you trusted your parents not to search through your stuff a lot more than most. Parents aren't going to give you any lectures or punish you for having a PS5 controller in your room.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 315d

I am once again lubing up a Kaiser roll with spicy brown mustard

Lemminary@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 315d (2 replies)

Are you gonna sponsor this for us? That shit is expensive for no good reason. It used to be affordable, but the brands got greedy. I used to buy a decent-sized tube for 250 pesos, but now it's $500 for the same tube or $99 for a couple of squirts.

Mac@mander.xyz · 2 pts · 313d

$99 for a couple of squirts, you say? 🤔
Go on...

glitch1985@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 314d

Grab a tub of coconut oil

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 314d (3 replies)

I never understood what lube is for...

MycelialMass@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 314d

Its for lubrication

rat@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 314d (1 reply)

You ever try shoving something up your ass/pussy when it's completely dry?

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 314d

Actually yes. My entire finger. Didn't find what I was looking for.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 314d

Is lithium grease good or should I go with graphite?

magnetosphere@fedia.io · 45 pts · 315d (1 reply)

OOP should just hump a Furby like a normal person

WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 314d

If those Furbies could feel anything, that'd be a warcrime.

skrlet13@feddit.cl · 38 pts · 315d (1 reply)

https://buttplug.io/ is compatible with xbox gamepads with rumble

ThunderclapSasquatch@startrek.website · 6 pts · 314d

This individual specified PS5, they might need DS4W too

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 30 pts · 315d

Connect to PC, use DS4Windows config screen.

ordnance_qf_17_pounder@reddthat.com · 29 pts · 315d (2 replies)

Sony should sell their own vibrators. Like a DS5, but everything cut off except for the grip to hold the vibration motor and the Dpad to adjust the settings.

Tangent5280@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 315d

And a flared base, of course.

LePoisson@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 315d

My initial Google search with Gemini says neither Sony nor their subsidiaries produce adult novelty vibrators.

However, I would be willing to bet money the same vibrating motors in their controllers are in a vibrator somewhere without knowing more details about how that tech is sourced. I could be wrong but I like to think somewhere someone is using the same vibrator to rub one out as the one in a PS5 controller.

Karyoplasma@discuss.tchncs.de · 28 pts · 315d (22 replies)

They don't do that because the controller chip will cancel vibration after a while. The reason for that is exactly what you would imagine people used it for.

You'd need to mod the controller with a custom chip.

Korne127@lemmy.world · 60 pts · 315d (13 replies)

The reason for that is exactly what you would imagine people used it for.

That does not make absolutely any sense at all. Why would they care about what people in private use controllers for? Why would they care enough to actively program something preventing that?

SARGE@startrek.website · 24 pts · 315d (8 replies)
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MajesticTechie@feddit.uk · 34 pts · 315d

Sony: "How dare you even think about using our controller for that"

Hitachi: "Have I got a product for you"

Know_not_Scotty_does@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 315d (5 replies)

Ah yes, Japan where Hitachi is from, famously not a company that made a magic wand.

boonhet@sopuli.xyz · 24 pts · 315d (1 reply)

Hitachi ceased production of the device in 2013 due to concerns about having the company name associated with a sex toy. Vibratex convinced the company to continue manufacturing it under the name "Original Magic Wand," omitting the Hitachi name. In 2014, the company used the name "Magic Wand Original."

LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 315d

To be fair, it's probably a reasonable marketing decision to not have your industrial and home equipment company best known for its sex toys. I get where that came from.

SARGE@startrek.website · 14 pts · 315d (1 reply)
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Holytimes@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 314d

On a serious note if you have a really bad cold, the magic wand pressed between your eyes while your face down will drain THE FUCK out of you sinuses and basically instantly clear out your head.

I suffer frequently from bad allergies bought the magic wand originally as a sex toy. Figured one day while suffering from a head so packed full of mucus that I wonder if it would help

HOLY FUCK DOES IT HELP

Holytimes@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 314d

Fun fact that's on sale right now on Amazon!

KoalaUnknown@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 315d

Japan is famous for its laws and customs regarding nudity, sex, porn, accessories, etc... Anything you might expect a stereotypical prude to clutch their pearls over, really. It's simply gasp too obscene!

That really isn’t the case though. Love hotels, “gentlemen’s clubs”, and other adult institutions are heavily advertised, and sex toys can be found almost anywhere – drug stores, superstores, even connivence stores.

Pieisawesome@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 11 pts · 315d

Most likely the motor will overheat since it’s not designed to run continuously

Inaminate_Carbon_Rod@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 315d

Doing “that” then trying to make a warranty claim.

Pechente@feddit.org · 2 pts · 315d

It matters as soon as people record themselves using it „wrong“ or tutorials go viral. Especially for a company that is really concerned about its public image like Sony.

iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 315d

I don't know if OP's claim is true, but I could see a company doing that to try and prevent unintended uses so to prevent damage/malfunction.

plantfanatic@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 315d

Something not designed to be running all the time would be damaged by running all the time…

papalonian@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 315d

Got a source for that? It's pretty easy to manually make controllers vibrate until you tell them to stop

ayyy@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 315d

Talking out of your ass like this must get you far in life. You’re quite good at it.

passepartout@feddit.org · 8 pts · 315d

Didn't know that. I would have guessed the reason is to save battery or stop annoying people when it isn't within reach / you can't turn it off.

jaaake@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 315d

How long is "a while?" I added this to a game but never tested it beyond a few minutes. The player can toggle it on or off, it is intended to stay on until toggled off as I did not add a timer to it.

Also, if there is a restriction at the firmware level, I suspect the reasoning would be as more of a safety measure to prevent excessive motor wear or battery drain.

CaptainBasculin@lemmy.bascul.in · 4 pts · 315d

Can't you just find the interval it cancels and retrigger vibration right after it cancels?

Amir@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 315d

DS4Windows can make a DS4 vibrate for at least like 60 seconds...

sentient_loom@sh.itjust.works · 0 pts · 315d

The S in PS5 is the first S in "fascist"

ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 315d

Idk if borderlands is on Playstation but in 2 and 3 moxxie gives you a gun that turns your controller into a vibrator

WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 315d (3 replies)

Play borderlands 2 and get the guns from moxxi one of the vibrates constantly when equipped

NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone · 3 pts · 315d (1 reply)

Nice try, Randy.

WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 315d

My bad... I know borderlands 4 is a disaster can you all please just focus on the fact that at one point we did make a decent game?

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 315d

As I played it with mouse and keyboard, I never got to experience the rumble effects of Moxxi's gear.

ryedaft@sh.itjust.works · 21 pts · 315d

long and hard

ouRKaoS@lemmy.today · 20 pts · 315d

I remember when the Xbox360 released their little indie game section there were multiple "controller vibration tests" that were like a dollar.

I had proper equipment by then, but I could see the appeal for someone who was in a different situation.

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 18 pts · 315d (10 replies)

To be fair, having recently been on the market for a proper vibrating sex toy, they're expensive as fuck, and according to my ex-wife (ow. ex- still stings.) capable of providing mind-blowing orgasms. So yeah, for those without a budget, we make do with what we got, or the bargain bin at Good Vibes.

TMI: ::: spoiler spoiler The item in question doesn't figure into why she's ex- now, but the reason we were on the market for one absolutely does. I'll be talking to an endocrinologist at the end of the year. :::

krooklochurm@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 315d (1 reply)

lol bros never polished his knob with a hitachi

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 296d

No, but I've seen CBT play feature vibrating the rope connected to a bound knob, so a GP medical vibrator can be used in that regard.

In my original story, the fancy vibe wasn't for me; I'm half-ace which is probably related to psychotropic meds and low-T. Also I shoot off once in a while NP when the stars align and I have a mind to.

Holytimes@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 314d (2 replies)

The MAGIC WAND hv-260 and all other models is currently 25% off on Amazon.

That's right you can now own your own MAGIC WAND for only 69.99. Vibrate your bits into next week with the classic and most powerful muscular relaxor with countless accountments and a time tested design.

ENJOY THE POWER, BUY A MAGIC WAND TODAY.

This is not an ad I just really like the magic wand an for 69 dollars it's a steal.

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 314d (1 reply)

A friend of mine had to vibrate the snot out of her leg as part of PT (it's a very long and gruesome story), and for stuff like that magic-wand type vibes are great. But the new orgasmotron vibes use weird biofeedback science and fancy rhythms to get the pulse just right for people who have various kinds of sexual dysfunction.

Some of them also relay your health issues back to the App provider to be added to your consumer profile and sold, so do use IoT security and try not to get ones that sell your info.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 314d

On one hand that sounds awesome, on the other hand that sounds so expensive its probably on par with a good tens unit which would also double as a muscle relief device.

thermal_shock@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 315d (4 replies)

They're not more than a new controller for the basic rabbit style vibrating ones. Controllers start around $60 in USA. I could be off, I got two Xbox controllers a few years ago to play couch games via steam, I don't own a console.

lightnsfw@reddthat.com · 2 pts · 314d (1 reply)

Presumably Op already have the controller though. Hence the question about how to JO with it instead of asking for suggestions on what vibrator to buy.

thermal_shock@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 314d

I was kinda talking for the future when it burns out. I don't think they are normally used in an "on" position for super long periods of time. I could be wrong. But vibrators aren't super expensive.

uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 314d (1 reply)

Controllers in 2015 were about $40 for a Playstation standard and could get up to $200 depending on the features you wanted (e.g. wireless, self charging, extended range, game domination features, etc.)

Most people have a $10-$30 market for sex toys until they get serious about it. Kids exploring their bits don't have any budget at all, and can only get things that pretend to be toys for kids.

Evidently, it's appropriate to get your tween a vibrating broomstick (or a bumble ball if you're a California hippy parent who wants to assure your toddler grows up well-adjusted) but not a vibrating rubber duckie. I'm not fully sure why.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 314d

You can probably get something serviceable in that price range, but tbh the magic wand is about $100 and yeah it's a "have a job" toy, but it's the sort of toy that people don't think of as "seriously getting into sex toys" toy. Though I will say that category does have several subdivisions once you're in it. There's a wide gulf between people who have a few vibrators and a strap on and the people who own a sybian

P1k1e@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 314d (4 replies)

Wouldn't a vibrator be cheaper

basxto@discuss.tchncs.de · 20 pts · 314d (2 replies)

Talking parents into buying a PS5 is probably easier

kadu@scribe.disroot.org · 9 pts · 314d (1 reply)

Here in Brazil there's a famous brand of chocolate called Baton. The chocolate sells well in general, but lots of kids ask for their eggs during Easter, and they usually come with toy cars or action figures or a water gun or whatever.

In one particular Easter, the eggs came with a toy that was a long cylinder with a smaller, rounded tip at one end.

This cylinder had just one feature: it vibrated a lot when you turn it on.

It also came with a minuscule pen, with almost no ink, you could attach to the device. Their explanation was that it was a fun vibrating pen toy. When asked how's a pen that vibrates any fun or useful, they had no answer, and why the device was significantly larger than the actual pen, also no answer.

So for Easter that year, kids got a penis-shaped vibrating toy... And a pen.

Who doesn't love a good old vibrating pen!

captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 314d

In the US in the 90's there was a pen, IIRC it was marketed as the Squiggle Writer, which was basically that. Fairly large plastic pen that had a vibrator at the far end, and interchangeable ballpoints that could be slotted into the writing end. When running, as you wrote with it it would cause the pen to draw little loops.

It was a plausibly deniable sex toy.

Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de · 7 pts · 314d

it'd also actually be made to be on for extended amounts of time, with a proper big vibration motor.
if you try to use a controller like this i'd bet it'll burn itself out in an hour..

blaa_vaffel@feddit.dk · 11 pts · 315d
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ObstreperousCanadian@lemmy.ca · 11 pts · 315d (1 reply)

Back in my day, people used the REZ vibrator accessory.

https://www.giantbomb.com/trance-vibrator/3000-6/

Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 315d

I bought one in like 2006, and still have it! You could also plug it into the computer, turn vibration to max, and it would go until you closed the program.

Great accessory!

RedFrank24@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 315d

The trick is to find a game that has a mounted turret with infinite ammo and then tape the button down. The Warthog in Halo, or the Street Sweeper in Mercenaries (with the infinite ammo cheat on).

ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 314d (1 reply)

Sackboy? Cyberspunk? Witcher 3: Wild Cunt?

Prox@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 314d

Hilariously, the actual Cyberpunk game would work for this. There's a weapon in the game that's just a giant dildo, and holding it causes your controller to rumble continuously.

passepartout@feddit.org · 6 pts · 315d

If OP were interested in learning about tech at the same time, they could research an easy way to call the controller API with a simple button / toggle in a project, possibly writing their own controller-to-vibrator App, e.g. in Godot.

NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone · 6 pts · 315d

I remember there being a cut-scene in something that was basically just this - might have been The Last Guardian. All it takes is the right save file.

yermaw@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 315d

No help to them now, especially on PS, but the xbox 360 had a game just for this. Well, for neck massages, wink.

Klear@quokk.au · 5 pts · 315d

Just play Trover Saves the Universe and get the Happy Ending.

dumbass@aussie.zone · 5 pts · 315d

Hook it up to a computer through bluetooth then you can set up something to make it run full speed for an extended time.

Alternatively, Thps game with infinite grind then hit a circle bowl.

FordBeeblebrox@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 315d

In Baldurs Gate 3 the controller vibrates when you’re choosing a target to cast a spell on, you could just hit R1 and leave it there…

Sparkles@fedia.io · 4 pts · 315d (5 replies)

Just pop over to cvs and get a back massager.

iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 315d (4 replies)

Someone desperate enough to masturbate with a ps5 controller does not have the means to buy anything.

krashmo@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 315d (1 reply)

Except apparently a ps5

iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 315d

Unless, say, they did not buy that ps5. Like a child might not buy their own electronics but rather be gifted them. Like a child who might be very hormonal and desperate to masturbate with anything that can vibrate.

Sparkles@fedia.io · 5 pts · 315d (1 reply)

I was thinking it might be an embarrassment issue. But that’s a good point. Although PS5 are pretty expensive iirc.

iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 315d

Consider: they did not buy the ps5 themselves because they are an extremely hormonal child.

FerretyFever0@fedia.io · 3 pts · 315d

Wow, no subtlety whatsoever lol

finitebanjo@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 315d

They could use a PC and the Nefarious SCP Driver kit in the calibration settings, but since controllers vibration motors aren't made to be running on full for extendes periods of time they will probably burn up.

ssfckdt@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 315d

searched the web

long and hard

JTskulk@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 314d

I just bought a new gamepad, the first with a rumblepak/vibrator that I've ever owned. I didn't know how to test it so I found 2 websites that will just vibrate it however you want. Then I found that this old remastered boomer shooter has rumble even when playing with keyboard and mouse! Let it sit on my belly while playing lol