See, the thing is, I watch piss porn. Hear me out. I told my friend that the thing is, to do piss porn, you kind of have to be into it. You could try and fake it, but it wouldn't be very convincing. So, my contention is, piss porn is more genuine than other types of porn, because the people partaking are statistically more likely to enjoy doing that type of porn. Which is great, I think, because then they really get into it, which is hot. It's that enjoyment that gets me off. Their enjoyment.
She said, "tomiant, you're an idiot. Anyone can fake liking getting pissed in the face."
So I said, "Well, if you're so adamant, get in the tub and I'll piss in your mouth, and let's see if it's as easy as you claim."
So she said, "All right. If I can fist you in the ass afterwards."
Which I felt was a fair deal, so I took it.
My (formal) position was strengthened significantly by the former event. And I can also attest that I could not convincingly fake enjoying being ass-fisted.
What does that have to do with anything, you ask? Genuinity. The real deal. That's what.
This is funny, but also just to bring reality to a funny comment, there is tons of piss porn where the women clearly do not enjoy it, but, and this is something a lot of people seem to not be able to understand; the enjoyment of all parties involved is not necessary for many people to get off. Heck, for some, its better without the fake enjoyment because you're being lied to less.
This is a wild ride. I've seen this like 4 times today... Why can't I stop reading the entire thing. I just walk away hella confused. I'm a simple man with simple dreams. And now I need therapy. Just kidding I definitely needed therapy well before this.
You could just use a robot dog! Then you could shoot it, stab it, violate it, and it would be ok! You wouldn't call the cops, right? Because it's not a real dog. It's a robot dog. Indistinguishable from the real thing, of course, yelping from the pain of betrayal, but that yelping, see the dog is programmed to feel that. It's just a program.
I'll say it again and again Owen Wilson is one of the shittiest human beings alive. Fuck him
Edit:
Owen Wilson has a 5yo doughter (with dna tests) with an ex girlfriend that he refuses to meet or acknowledge because it's a girl and he doesn't want female children. On HER birthday he took his boys to a baseball game and posted a fatherly message to the both of them.
He might be but what he's saying makes sense. Just means to me you shouldn't write a dog dying into a script if you want it to be a realistic looking scene.
Only thing I'm personally aware of is his refusing to recognize his daughter? Maybe OP knows his daughter (or, according to Owen Wilson, some random bastard bitch who isn't his daughter)?
How do you remember the difference between Owen Wilson and Chris Pratt? I keep getting them confused. I know Chris Pratt was in Community, but maybe Owen Wilson was also? I'm not sure.
I only remember him as a relatively frequent collaborator to Ben Stiller. Not even sure how many times they actually did that. And TBH I don't think I've even watched any movie with Chris Pratt, he got famous way later than Wilson.
47 Comments
tomiant@piefed.social · 211 pts · 267d
See, the thing is, I watch piss porn. Hear me out. I told my friend that the thing is, to do piss porn, you kind of have to be into it. You could try and fake it, but it wouldn't be very convincing. So, my contention is, piss porn is more genuine than other types of porn, because the people partaking are statistically more likely to enjoy doing that type of porn. Which is great, I think, because then they really get into it, which is hot. It's that enjoyment that gets me off. Their enjoyment.
She said, "tomiant, you're an idiot. Anyone can fake liking getting pissed in the face."
So I said, "Well, if you're so adamant, get in the tub and I'll piss in your mouth, and let's see if it's as easy as you claim."
So she said, "All right. If I can fist you in the ass afterwards."
Which I felt was a fair deal, so I took it.
My (formal) position was strengthened significantly by the former event. And I can also attest that I could not convincingly fake enjoying being ass-fisted.
What does that have to do with anything, you ask? Genuinity. The real deal. That's what.
Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works · 104 pts · 267d
-- tomiant
Unprompted
LarsIsCool@lemmy.world · 55 pts · 267d
How is this not a copy pasta?
Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works · 35 pts · 267d
It is now.
lugal@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 267d
Not yet
CriticalMiss@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 267d
Be the change you want to see in the world
InFerNo@lemmy.ml · 51 pts · 267d
How do I delete someone else's comment
sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 19 pts · 266d
Type /quit <person's name here> and it will quit them from
IRCLemmy.Valmond@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 266d
ALT+F4 of course.
petrol_sniff_king@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 27 pts · 267d
Thank you, this saved me a lot of work.
tomiant@piefed.social · 14 pts · 267d
I'm just stating the obvious.
Credibly_Human@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 266d
This is funny, but also just to bring reality to a funny comment, there is tons of piss porn where the women clearly do not enjoy it, but, and this is something a lot of people seem to not be able to understand; the enjoyment of all parties involved is not necessary for many people to get off. Heck, for some, its better without the fake enjoyment because you're being lied to less.
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social · 12 pts · 266d
Or they want the person to feel shamed and disgusted.
afox@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 266d
This is a wild ride. I've seen this like 4 times today... Why can't I stop reading the entire thing. I just walk away hella confused. I'm a simple man with simple dreams. And now I need therapy. Just kidding I definitely needed therapy well before this.
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 17 pts · 267d
Scat porn is where people with real passion go.
Iambus@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 266d
Alrighty then..
krooklochurm@lemmy.ca · 7 pts · 267d
This makes the mars bars meme look like advice animals
SlurpingPus@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 267d
‘Coke is the real thing’
Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 74 pts · 267d
Gotta love Clickhole 😄
Kenny2999@lemmy.world · 70 pts · 267d
"No animals were
leftinjured during filming."ameancow@lemmy.world · 62 pts · 267d
exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 19 pts · 266d
That's definitely the clickhole logo in the cropped watermark, intended to be pure satire.
DupaCycki@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 266d
Thanks for confirming. Was about to waste time fact checking.
abbadon420@sh.itjust.works · 31 pts · 267d
Wow!
Formfiller@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 266d
Kristi noem entered the chat
errer@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 267d
The “unprompted” is what elevates this to the next level
tomiant@piefed.social · 10 pts · 267d
You could just use a robot dog! Then you could shoot it, stab it, violate it, and it would be ok! You wouldn't call the cops, right? Because it's not a real dog. It's a robot dog. Indistinguishable from the real thing, of course, yelping from the pain of betrayal, but that yelping, see the dog is programmed to feel that. It's just a program.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQcNYb3DydA
datavoid@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 267d
Now, the dog IS programmed not to like it, but it can't actually feel any pain!
tomiant@piefed.social · 2 pts · 267d
I will never ever stop watching that god damned clip. I post it frivolously.
AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 266d
TomArrr@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 266d
Marley & Me just got a little sadder
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 266d
Oh, it gets worse.
LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 265d
That's informative & interesting, but there's nothing bad about it at all.
TomArrr@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 264d
It proves it wasn't real 😞
resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 266d
Oh wow.
MissJinx@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 267d
I'll say it again and again Owen Wilson is one of the shittiest human beings alive. Fuck him
Edit: Owen Wilson has a 5yo doughter (with dna tests) with an ex girlfriend that he refuses to meet or acknowledge because it's a girl and he doesn't want female children. On HER birthday he took his boys to a baseball game and posted a fatherly message to the both of them.
I'm sorry but wtf a 5yo girl did to deserve this?
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 15 pts · 267d
The fuck did he do? Kill your dog?
LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 267d
He might be but what he's saying makes sense. Just means to me you shouldn't write a dog dying into a script if you want it to be a realistic looking scene.
tomiant@piefed.social · 3 pts · 266d
The Thing was pretty realistic.
IronBird@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 266d
did i miss something with Owens?
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 266d
Only thing I'm personally aware of is his refusing to recognize his daughter? Maybe OP knows his daughter (or, according to Owen Wilson, some random bastard bitch who isn't his daughter)?
MissJinx@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 266d
I don't have to know them to believe a man that actively does things to hurt a 5yo girl just because she is a girl is an asshole.
sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 266d
How do you remember the difference between Owen Wilson and Chris Pratt? I keep getting them confused. I know Chris Pratt was in Community, but maybe Owen Wilson was also? I'm not sure.
Nasan@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 266d
Owen Wilson had a cameo in Community in the episode where Jack Black guest starred. Don't remember any episodes with Chris Pratt.
sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 266d
Wait I'm thinking of Parks and Rec, not Community. Damn.
I double checked wikipedia, and Chris Pratt is in that one (his name is Andy).
Owen Wilson on the other hand is best known for Wes Anderson films and stupid comedies, but also Pixar's Cars and friggin Armageddon???
Huh weird. I still feel like I have no idea how to remember him, except that hes the main voice in cars I guess.
rumschlumpel@feddit.org · 2 pts · 266d
I only remember him as a relatively frequent collaborator to Ben Stiller. Not even sure how many times they actually did that. And TBH I don't think I've even watched any movie with Chris Pratt, he got famous way later than Wilson.
ExLisper@lemmy.curiana.net · 1 pts · 266d
Ruggero Deodato agrees.
pyre@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 266d
where's the lie though