It’s cardboard, not depleted uranium. How the fuck is it so dangerous I must dispose of it if damaged? The entire point of the product is for the furry psychopath that lives with me to damage it. It literally has no other reason to exist.
I cannot imagine what lawsuit led to this
67 Comments
tiramichu@sh.itjust.works · 110 pts · 264d
The whole "discard if damaged" is likely just standard cover-your-ass legalese which the lawyers will copy-paste on every single product they sell, including this one.
fizzle@quokk.au · 40 pts · 264d
It's this.
Lawyers: put the warnings on everything. Managers: what warnings? Lawyers: the warnings. Managers: yeah but Lawyers: on everything.
idunnololz@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 264d
WARNING: This product contains chemicals known to the state of California to cause cancer, birth defects, or other reproductive harm.
echodot@feddit.uk · 5 pts · 263d
It's like on medication when it says something along the lines of, do not take this medication if you are allergic to this medication or think you might be allergic to this medication.
Good now it's your fault if you have an allergic reaction.
pimento64@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 263d
heydo@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 263d
I would imagine this same label is applied to all of their products as a cost savings measure.
fushuan@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 62 pts · 264d
Gets damage, kid uses it as a stool, falls, parents decide to blame the company.
Pretty run of the mill situation tbh.
clmbmb@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 41 pts · 264d
Only in America.
fushuan@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 27 pts · 264d
I presumed that since they mentioned a lawsuit.
monkeyslikebananas2@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 264d
True. Everyone knows other countries have no laws! /s
Klear@quokk.au · 26 pts · 264d
We do have laws! Just no suits. Everyone is naked here.
Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 264d
It's an Ex-Mas miracle!
diabetic_porcupine@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 258d
Sludge@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 264d
These things actually only degrade as your cat uses them in America. Elsewhere the cardboard doesn't mix with hair and fall off into little cardboard chunks that are attractive for small children to eat. Also, the structural integrity actually only gets stronger in other parts of the world, so you're actually encouraged to step on it, as after some play and what might seem like structural damage to a piece of cardboard, it can actually support the weight of a fully grown adult.
naeap@sopuli.xyz · 10 pts · 264d
Doesn't it?
The small pieces the cat rips out fill the holes and make the structure stronger, until the cat can't use it anymore, because it's too strong for its claws
Then we use it as bricks for our houses
Haven't you seen the cardboard quarries full of cats working their ass off?
Edit: on a second thought, that's also why de-clawing is unethical here, because it hinders our never ending demand on bricks...
Apytele@sh.itjust.works · 9 pts · 264d
Sludge@sh.itjust.works · -1 pts · 264d
Ok, I'll bite. So no warning labels? I understand that this is being interpreted as a result of litigation. If there's not a warning label on a car seat or crib for your newborn... Honestly, why would I need to make sure there aren't blankets in the crib or that the mattress isn't too close to my space heater? If the mattress catches on fire or my child suffocates because they're too small to rotate onto their back but their airway was obstructed by the comfy furry blankets I put into their crib - look, I just wanted them to be comfortable!
I may have lost my baby, but there's no point in suing anyone. I should have known better! There were no warning labels. I'll just sleep it off - a life lost, but nobody to blame. It's chill, all good!
shalafi@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 264d
You only hear about the ridiculous lawsuits. Local lawyer used to explain it on the radio all the time.
Our sense of risk is absurdly out of whack with reality.
echodot@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 263d
According to a friend who's a lawyer she once had to explain to someone that she can't sue her landlord because she slipped on a wet floor, since it was her house and therefore her wet floor. The landlord merely owns the house, but didn't make the floor wet.
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 246d
companies also love to make it look like lawsuits are frivolous, when in reality the lawsuit was just "they gave me literally boiling hot coffee, not 40°C, not 50°C, literally 95°C coffee that melted my skin when i spilled it"
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 36 pts · 264d
I remember a summer about 10 years ago, when I went out at the beginning of summer to buy some new pool noodles. I looked everywhere, and couldn't find them, all summer.
The next year, they were back, but they all had new tags that said "Not to be inserted rectally."
Suddenly, I knew why they hadn't been available, as lawsuits and regulatory issues got worked out. All because someone looked at a pool noodle, and got a weird idea.
Iheartcheese@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 264d
So you put it in your butt right?
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 263d
Yeah, I wondered if it actually gave some people the idea: "Hmmm, hadn't thought of that, but now that you mention it..."
cheesybuddha@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 264d
Or a friends butt. Get permission first though
Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 264d
Maybe after they permission, they convinced the friend to do ass to ass. Like that movie.
absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz · 3 pts · 263d
Requiem for a Dream, you mean that movie!
Salamanderwizard@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 263d
More like Rectum for a Dream...
Please don't kick me out...
YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 263d
Now we need a hero to test the sounding characteristics.
riskable@programming.dev · 30 pts · 264d
Clearly, you do not understand THE POWER of corrugated cardboard!
Frenchgeek@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 263d
Darth Vader from Wish?
bluesheep@sh.itjust.works · 30 pts · 264d
The dangers of corrugated cardboard are unknown to most, it's good they're trying to spread awereness
Dozzi92@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 264d
We should do a fun run to raise money for victims of corrugated cardboard abuse.
muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 264d
-in the arms of the angles plays-
Madison420@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 264d
I've always wanted to be held by a kind gentle right angle.
muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 264d
God I hate what the iPhone keyboard has become.
Madison420@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 264d
Hey at least you have an excuse, I'm just dyslexic and have stupid fingers.
bdonvr@thelemmy.club · 27 pts · 264d
That Spanish translation is awful
Chivera@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 264d
Your favorite pet only 😂
randint@lemmy.frozeninferno.xyz · 2 pts · 264d
Hey can you give a better Spanish translation? I'm a beginner at learning Spanish and was reading the Spanish version in the picture and going "oh I see, so this is how you say this."
bdonvr@thelemmy.club · 10 pts · 264d
"No permita niños que juegen con o cerca de este articulo." Is pretty jumbled up. "No permita que los niños jueguen con este artículo ni cerca de él." would be more correct. The way it's written is like "Don't allow kids that play with or near this article", and "juegen" is spelled incorrectly
"Este producto se diseña para un específico y un uso previsto" - "se diseña" makes it sound like it designed itself? It should be "está diseñado". Also they're missing something to go with "específico", probably "propósito específico"/"specific purpose" as is it just reads "for a specific" which makes no sense.
"Esto no se piensa para el uso como paso." Sounds like "This is not thought of for use as a step", but step in this case meaning like a footstep (action) not a stair step (noun). It should be something more like "No está diseñado para ser usado como escalón"
Lastly "animal favorito"... It would mean exactly what it does in English. My favorite animal is the dolphin. Pet, however, should be "mascota". And also why only the favorite? So if one of my cats is my favorite animal then I should only let my other cats play with it? Lol.
Disclaimer: not a native Spanish speaker, just a self taught learner of several years.
echodot@feddit.uk · 7 pts · 263d
It reminds me of the time at work that we got a piece of industrial equipment. The manual clearly had been translated from Chinese into English via a Tibetan monk who would never heard either language.
It said things like "ensure when on that the fingers are not found" and "if loud kick immediately and call for help from empowering". The best bit was the warning at the top that said "DO NOT DANGEROUS", which was very helpful.
For some reason it also had a biohazard label on the box. It was a laser engraver. Where's the biohazard?
Alaknar@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 263d
That's pretty good life advice in general.
randint@lemmy.frozeninferno.xyz · 2 pts · 263d
Thank you!!
dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 264d
Do not allow children who play with or near this object! Don't fucking do it!
srestegosaurio@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 264d
I came to the comments explicitly to complain about it lmao.
papalonian@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 264d
Maybe your cat is dumb, rips a chunk out, decides to eat it, cat could get sick or catch fire or something
wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 264d
"nom" 😼
"MEOW?!?" on fire🙀
muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 264d
If your pussy has a burning sensation, I highly doubt it was cardboard that did that.
Avicenna@programming.dev · 14 pts · 264d
sounds like liability cover
Doomsider@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 264d
Choking hazard, next.
bulwark@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 264d
It's because for the corpo, it's cheaper to say it might hurt you than to not say anything at all.
Korhaka@sopuli.xyz · 12 pts · 264d
My kayak has this warning on it. When everything warns you it causes cancer people no longer take the warnings seriously. Now where did my Cobalt 60 lollipop go.
echodot@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 263d
I've seen this warning on a t-shirt. Not on the label of the t-shirt, the actual design of the t-shirt. Which presumably also constitutes a warning, I bet the lawyers love that one.
altphoto@lemmy.today · 10 pts · 263d
The Spanish is wack. That last line says to only use it for your favorite pet.
muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 263d
“Bad kitty! That’s for the superior cat!”
cupcakezealot@piefed.blahaj.zone · 9 pts · 263d
take this item but beware it comes with a terrible curse
muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 263d
Thank you, Mr needful.
Blackmist@feddit.uk · 9 pts · 263d
It's for cats to scratch. It's supposed to be damaged.
muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 263d
Right?!
not_me@piefed.social · 7 pts · 264d
Agent641@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 264d
Drop and run
Ioughttamow@fedia.io · 4 pts · 264d
That was the bridge to Tarabithia 😢
ulterno@programming.dev · 3 pts · 263d
Maybe someone ate it and got food poisoning?
BussyCat@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 263d
The last line mentions not using it as a step so maybe someone was stepping on it and after a while it broke down and they fell and sued
ulterno@programming.dev · 2 pts · 263d
Yeah, kinda weir on that one.
It is surprising how people can be unreasonable when they are given the ability to.
Though I can think of conspiracy theories for this behaviour.
Guess I should go to jokeconspiracy@lemmy.ca considering how many of these come to my mind.
21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com · 3 pts · 264d
The do not use as a step thing I could see, trying to think of other misuses though, other than eating shit you shouldn't.
echodot@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 263d
It makes it sound like some cursed item. Get the SCP on this.
YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 263d
Easily damaged paper product.
Is omnipotent,and can do anything unless it is slightly damaged. If attempting to use it while it is not pristine, will lead to a catastrophic cascade of calamity that may or may not result in false vacuum decay destroying everything from itself at the speed of light.
Lyrl@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 263d
The damage thing might be intended in the way packaged things intended to be swallowed say not to use if the seal was broken. I think it means if you open the new product for the first time, and it clearly had a transport accident and is soaked with unknown liquid and covered in white powder, don't give it to your cat.
If it looks as expected when you open it, and you know later damage was caused by your household and is mechanical only, that's fine. Like it's fine to use the sour cream that had an intact seal when it arrived in your house, but if the first time you open it from the store the seal is cut, toss it.