Might I introduce you to the good old Dutch tradition of swearing with diseases?
Tuberculosis ("tering!"), typhoid ("tyfus!"), cholera ("klere"), mange ("schurft"), smallpox ("pokken") are pretty cool and acceptable. Cancer used to be common but that's rather fallen out of fashion. You can also combine it with religious swearing AND reproductive organs for a trifecta.
"Godverdetyfuskutzooi" is just a beauty, but "goddamtyphoidvaginamess" doesn't work in English.
using "cancer" as a swearword is considered very bad these days, so we've actually started to censor the swearing/insults down to "the c-word" meaning that "You're a C-whore" is now actually a thing people say.
So back in the day tumblr didn't have comments. It did allow you to add tags when reblogging, so people used that instead. Of course these days tumblr does have comments, but all the good comments still get put in the tags.
Friend of mine refuses to cuss. She makes up childish ones in their place.
One day we were playing League of Legends and she fucked something up then said: "Son of a biscuit bean-dip mother-frito!!!" I'd never say it in place of a good "oh fuck me, then" but I will never forget it for as long as I live.
Heaven is actually from the old english word for sky (Sky is from norse instead), so "Good Heavens" can be interpreted as non religious. In fact, Heaven singular is the afterlife place, heavens plural means the vast skies and stars, so i certainly see 'Good Heavens' as irreligious.
Anyone else who remembers this better from "Cow &chicken" correct me, but this is what I recall "dad" exclaiming:
"Well, shave my legs and call me grandpa"
A) homophobic
B) sexist
C) religious
D) sexual
E) body parts
F) bigoted/slurs
G) demeaning or punching down
is difficult and very rare.
I hypothesize following some of these patterns but punching up at those/that which is unethical/bad whilst avoiding immortalizing that which doesn't deserve it, for true disrespect.
I think that by novelly correcting the common lexicon, we can attempt to redirect/rewrite values in society that need to change, by utilizing shame and rhetoric in a way that is more constructive than things like putting down healthy human acceptance, trauma, or class struggles.
This makes sense, but I can't come up with any examples.
I'd also like an option for sneezing. Literally every society addresses sneezing with either a religious blessing or a with for good health. I understand that this comes from illness being a threat but now sneezing is more of an inconvenience than anything. I just can't find a way to tell whatever causes the sneeze to fuck off without the sneezer taking it as directed at them.
Exclamations I used to say:
"Big black bats!" - something to do with Batman or something?
"Great Qubits!" - I liked quantum physics, because I didn't understand it
Insults and exclamations I say now:
"Eat a (some kind of weapon)!" - Fancy way to tell someone "kill yourself". Like "Eat a grenade", "Eat a gun"
Random syllables that sound like Klingon mixed with Slavic and Hebrew - I speak none of those languages, but still say stuff like "Vzer krakh!" when I get annoyed by popups.
"Koskenkorva!" - the Finnish vodka-like drink. I don't even drink that.
Breaking the "non-religous" constraint, because i want to:
"Jesus Christ in a tank!" - In response to something very surprising that I can't remember
Saving the best for last: Captain Haddock interjections.
"Ten thousand thundering typhoons!"
"Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles!"
"Addlepated lumps of anthracite!"
"Antediluvian bulldozer!"
"Bashi-bazouks!"
"Pompous popinjay!"
"Pockmark!"
In Derry Girls, the girls all walked into the kitchen where there was a visiting plumber they thought was hot (he wasnt), and one said "Well, fook me sideways!" I've been using that regularly ever since.
Also, don't undervalue the satisfaction of going into a full Yosemite Sam litany of nonsense: "Hazzen frazzen jimpin jampin frazzle bazzle mizzen mazzen grizzle bizzle...!!!"
A lot of the supposedly clean exclamations are minced oaths, sacrilegious/sexual/scatological swears slightly changed around to make them acceptable in polite company (and easy to quickly change to when you started saying the rude version); i.e. “good golly” = “good God”, “bother” = “bugger”, and so on.
Fun fact: An archaic word for these is "ejaculations". Now, imagine 12 year old me, having read old British fiction from like 1700s-1800s and picking up on archaic words like that and using them in front of my peers.
I didn't have a pleasant childhood. heh.
Also, "golly" was mentioned as a non-religious one, but "golly" ultimately comes from "God", so… alas, it doesn't qualify.
55 Comments
Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works · 37 pts · 150d
Might I introduce you to the good old Dutch tradition of swearing with diseases?
Tuberculosis ("tering!"), typhoid ("tyfus!"), cholera ("klere"), mange ("schurft"), smallpox ("pokken") are pretty cool and acceptable. Cancer used to be common but that's rather fallen out of fashion. You can also combine it with religious swearing AND reproductive organs for a trifecta.
"Godverdetyfuskutzooi" is just a beauty, but "goddamtyphoidvaginamess" doesn't work in English.
MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io · 17 pts · 150d
Perhaps not, but I think “cunt jumble” needs to enter the lexicon.
AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space · 5 pts · 150d
apparently the rudest thing you can call a Dutch person literally translates as “cancer-whore”
Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 150d
Yeah, pretty much exactly true.
using "cancer" as a swearword is considered very bad these days, so we've actually started to censor the swearing/insults down to "the c-word" meaning that "You're a C-whore" is now actually a thing people say.
starik@lemmy.zip · 26 pts · 150d
#why do they #talk like this #?
Doxin@pawb.social · 44 pts · 150d
So back in the day tumblr didn't have comments. It did allow you to add tags when reblogging, so people used that instead. Of course these days tumblr does have comments, but all the good comments still get put in the tags.
Tumblr is a special place.
Natanael@slrpnk.net · 1 pts · 150d
Hashtagnofilter
Munkisquisher@lemmy.nz · 15 pts · 150d
Australia has you covered
"strewth" "mate" "maaaaate" "shit a brick" "you little ripper" "bonza" "bloody oath"
LavaPlanet@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 150d
Yeah, "mate" is perfect, it's just as versatile as "fuck".
BellyPurpledGerbil@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 150d
Friend of mine refuses to cuss. She makes up childish ones in their place.
One day we were playing League of Legends and she fucked something up then said: "Son of a biscuit bean-dip mother-frito!!!" I'd never say it in place of a good "oh fuck me, then" but I will never forget it for as long as I live.
FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 150d
::: spoiler There are actually a lot:
moondoggie@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 150d
HexesofVexes@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 150d
"Hex me purple" is the one I use when teaching.
There is also "aww skyte" which is gibberish, but it feels right.
AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space · 3 pts · 150d
it sounds like a plausible dialect version of “shite”, so even if it didn’t consciously start out as one, it’ll be perceived as such
xxploit@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 150d
Anyone else who remembers this better from "Cow &chicken" correct me, but this is what I recall "dad" exclaiming:
"Well, shave my legs and call me grandpa"
RamenJunkie@midwest.social · 6 pts · 150d
Well I'll be a monkey's uncle!
What in tarnation?
Lumidaub@feddit.org · 1 pts · 150d
That's religious though.
AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space · 3 pts · 150d
“tarnation” is a minced oath for “damnation”, from back when folks believed in and dreaded the fires of Hell.
RamenJunkie@midwest.social · 2 pts · 150d
TIL
Lumidaub@feddit.org · 2 pts · 150d
Hence not what the tumblrite in the OP was looking for.
Tikiporch@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 150d
I guess technically "By the Nine" is a religious exclamation.
Willoughby@piefed.world · 4 pts · 150d
"you're finally awake"
TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 150d
The nine... Muses? Mothers of Heimdall? Months of childbirth? Worlds on Yggdrasil?
FishFace@piefed.social · 2 pts · 150d
The nine divines you apostate!
TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 150d
Sorry you're going to have to elaborate :p
FishFace@piefed.social · 2 pts · 150d
It's an elder Scrolls reference :)
AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space · 1 pts · 150d
You could substitute any number and get a superficially meaningless swear that means “substitute appropriately heavy blasphemy here”.
Tikiporch@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 150d
"By the Seven" if you're ever in Westoros.
Dojan@pawb.social · 1 pts · 150d
I thought they were mostly secular in Västerås.
DeltaWingDragon@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 98d
Nine rings for the mortal men doomed to die?
SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 6 pts · 150d
Having swears that hit hard that aren't:
A) homophobic
B) sexist
C) religious
D) sexual
E) body parts
F) bigoted/slurs
G) demeaning or punching down
is difficult and very rare.
I hypothesize following some of these patterns but punching up at those/that which is unethical/bad whilst avoiding immortalizing that which doesn't deserve it, for true disrespect.
I think that by novelly correcting the common lexicon, we can attempt to redirect/rewrite values in society that need to change, by utilizing shame and rhetoric in a way that is more constructive than things like putting down healthy human acceptance, trauma, or class struggles.
Taleya@aussie.zone · 14 pts · 150d
You absolute walnut
Lumidaub@feddit.org · 0 pts · 150d
Are you accusing me of nutting on the wall??
Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 150d
This makes sense, but I can't come up with any examples.
I'd also like an option for sneezing. Literally every society addresses sneezing with either a religious blessing or a with for good health. I understand that this comes from illness being a threat but now sneezing is more of an inconvenience than anything. I just can't find a way to tell whatever causes the sneeze to fuck off without the sneezer taking it as directed at them.
Rivalarrival@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 150d
"Suck start a shotgun" is my go-to.
somethingsnappy@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 150d
It's a shit fuck of a dick fight. Need to trade out fuck, I guess...
OneWomanCreamTeam@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 150d
I have a bunch of these I came up with for a DND character I played for a while. Try to read this with a deep southern accent.
Well, paddle my ass and call me a sailboat
Well, spit in my mouth and call me a saxophone
Well, fill me with meat and call me a sandwich
shweddy@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 150d
Fuck me sideways and call me craig
Dojan@pawb.social · 3 pts · 150d
My favourite so far is an Irish character saying "shit the bed" with a Corkish accent.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 150d
I like "shit on it!" but that might just be because I recently watched Friday Night Dinner.
"Oh shit on it. Shit on the shitting thing!'
belastend@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 150d
Uff
Weiß ich ja nicht
Tja
Machste nix
Fick mich in den Arsch und nenn mich Jesus
Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 150d
"Bugger me with a fish fork!"
"By the tits of my ancestors!"
DeltaWingDragon@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 98d
Exclamations I used to say:
"Big black bats!" - something to do with Batman or something?
"Great Qubits!" - I liked quantum physics, because I didn't understand it
Insults and exclamations I say now:
"Eat a (some kind of weapon)!" - Fancy way to tell someone "kill yourself". Like "Eat a grenade", "Eat a gun"
Random syllables that sound like Klingon mixed with Slavic and Hebrew - I speak none of those languages, but still say stuff like "Vzer krakh!" when I get annoyed by popups.
"Koskenkorva!" - the Finnish vodka-like drink. I don't even drink that.
Breaking the "non-religous" constraint, because i want to:
"Jesus Christ in a tank!" - In response to something very surprising that I can't remember
Saving the best for last: Captain Haddock interjections.
"Ten thousand thundering typhoons!"
"Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles!"
"Addlepated lumps of anthracite!"
"Antediluvian bulldozer!"
"Bashi-bazouks!"
"Pompous popinjay!"
"Pockmark!"
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 150d
In Derry Girls, the girls all walked into the kitchen where there was a visiting plumber they thought was hot (he wasnt), and one said "Well, fook me sideways!" I've been using that regularly ever since.
figjam@midwest.social · 2 pts · 150d
Jeepers
Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 150d
Like, zoinks!
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 2 pts · 150d
Anything can be an exclamation if you put an exclamation mark at the end! 😃
GraniteM@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 150d
What in the name of absolute fuck?
Also, don't undervalue the satisfaction of going into a full Yosemite Sam litany of nonsense: "Hazzen frazzen jimpin jampin frazzle bazzle mizzen mazzen grizzle bizzle...!!!"
chicagohuman@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 150d
Darwin's Beard!
AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space · 1 pts · 150d
A lot of the supposedly clean exclamations are minced oaths, sacrilegious/sexual/scatological swears slightly changed around to make them acceptable in polite company (and easy to quickly change to when you started saying the rude version); i.e. “good golly” = “good God”, “bother” = “bugger”, and so on.
Alberat@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 150d
by the nine divines!
RattlerSix@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 150d
You can't go wrong with borrowing from Gus Chiggins, Old Prospector. "Ahhh peaches!" "Ohhh pickle juice!" "Awww cinnamon and gravy!"
https://youtu.be/cKoIESw1tdM
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 150d
From my martial arts days: ish! It was the default thing to use when kids or visitors were present in the dojo.
But, things line ishkabibble, googoogamooga, well spank my ass and call me charlie, or others have a great spot for things like hammering your thumb
Oh! Shit fire and save matches
daychilde@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 150d
Fun fact: An archaic word for these is "ejaculations". Now, imagine 12 year old me, having read old British fiction from like 1700s-1800s and picking up on archaic words like that and using them in front of my peers.
I didn't have a pleasant childhood. heh.
Also, "golly" was mentioned as a non-religious one, but "golly" ultimately comes from "God", so… alas, it doesn't qualify.