His father is Charles Coristine, who bought the snack company LesserEvil in 2011 and runs it as chief executive. His maternal grandfather was Valery Martynov, a KGB lieutenant colonel who spied for the FBI and CIA in the 1980s and was executed in Moscow in 1987 after Aldrich Ames and Robert Hanssen betrayed him. Coristine has said on Fox News that his grandfather “died so that I could come here and live in this free country that I love so much.”
The pitts of the Stalin regime held twice the percentage of incarcerated, multiple famines, no real elections, widespread war, etc. The USA isn't there yet but it will be.
The number of people the USA currently has in prison far outpaces the height of the gulag system in absolute numbers and percentage of the population. If you want to talk about famines you can check out how the USA treated indigenous people. To be frank, Stalin was small time compared to the USA, whether you’re talking historically or currently.
I really hate that every cent we spend that doesn't go to like, struggling indie artists we enjoy, goes straight into the pockets of people actively obsessed with making our existence miserable.
I love(/s) how mask-off Fox is now. "Former KGB double-agent lineage put into high places of government when people still remember the Red Scare? Fiiiiine! Look he's so rich 🇺🇸🗽🦅🏈pAtRiOtIc. . .
. . .REMEMBER WHEN OBAMA WORE A TAN SUIT THO AND MAMDANI HANDED SOMEONE A PEN?! THE OUTRAGE!! Shariah law! Immigrants! Reeee!!" [mouth foaming intensifies]
It feels like 50's-80's Republicans, still-evil as they were, would eat these bitches alive. LOL
As much as they screech about slippery slopes, it seems conservatism is the ultimate one. What vague notion of principles they might have had, erodes astonishingly quickly as soon as money and vulnerable children are dangled in front of them.
An opposition that lacks any kind of consistency doesn't deserve even the slightest respect.
This is why you always want to get law enforcement credentials before doing fascist errands. Law enforcement gets qualified immunity; civilian contractors are patsies.
The effective immunity they de facto enjoy is MUCH more complete, though.
For every cop shooting where the cop suffers so much as an unpaid suspension, there's dozens if not hundreds that get off scot free after committing all crimes up to and including serial murder.
Oh, law enforcement ends up being above the law in many cases. For example, tinting on windshields in California. Cops get 100%, everyone else has to follow certain % rules so cops can feel safe during traffic stops. This is just a minor example.
I remember some actual military veteran explaining that they almost never give the toughest fighters badass nicknames. You can kid around with guys with nicknames like 'Big Balls' or 'Killer' but run away from the guy they call 'Kitten' or 'Candy.'
If the handful of veterans that I know are anything to go by, military nicknames are often directly related to the dumbest mistake they made during their enlistment.
I bet that he actually has big balls, but because of Chlamydia.
Just remembered Nicki Minaj's tweet which sent Trinidads health organizations onto a wild goose chase because she linked her STD-ridden guy to the COVID vaccine.
They're a bunch rich nepobabies who have failed upwards their whole life (as an example Swollen Testicles here is the heir to Lesser Evil snacks), they probably viewed this as yet another "smash and grab" corporate looting to use as a step up to their next jobs. I'm honestly skeptical that they'll end up as fall guys, after all the Trump administration has shown that crime is legal as long as you've got a R next to your name.
as an example Swollen Testicles here is the heir to Lesser Evil snacks
Well that's irritating. Some of their popcorn is delicious.
I should have trusted my logic that a company called "Lesser Evil" is still admitting it's evil, its main selling point being "Our competition is more-er evil" ...
...presupposing that "Not evil" simply isn't an option in our socioeconomic system. Because of course.
No, they thought they were the cyberpunk hackers going against the evil government and they are all cool and underground and shit (even if they had the backing of the most powerful man in the country and the richest man on earth).
It’s already been answered but, if you haven’t seen it, watch The Nice Guys, that movie is so damned funny and good. Probably my favorite roles that both Ryan Gosling and Russell Crowe have ever done.
I don't anymore. The only balls I juggle are standard size. Also, I don't masturbate in my window anymore. These are two seperate things I'm talking about involving big balls. One is regarding how I used to juggle large bowling balls, the other is about how I used tp furiously masturbate in my window to all forms of pedestrians passing by. But, regardless, I am in compliance with your wishes and I want you to thank me for this.
There is a reason they got a stupid naive kid to do their dirty work. He is the fall guy they can blame, and yes, if he spills the beans he will fall out of a window, or something or that nature.
Elon is happy, all the investigations against his companies have been stopped fully.
yeah you get this question about a difficult time and I have this story about someone being so crazy with timelines that they were going to do this really illegal thing and how I talked to the boss to talk to them and stopped it. Im starting to think that puts me on the no way list.
When you send out a resume make sure it's ATS compliant. I have Claude rewrite each resume based on the job description posted so it triggers whatever software hr is using.
::: spoiler The Ballad of Big Balls by Jesse Welles
When I heard the NRA was writing big-ass cheques
I went right down to Virginia and I said “me next”
They said go ye to the schools and spread the good news
I said I need a bulletproof vest and some good running shoes
They said “we got those” I said “cool, where at?”
They said “they’re next to the spoons making everyone fat”
Now I was rolling my eyes like a rolling stone
When uncle Huckabee called me on the telephone
He said “I’m raising up money for a people in need”
I said “of course, uncle Huck’, that strip is starving indeed”
He said “the lord’s at work here, boy, and the job ain’t done
Son you need Jesus, and Jesus needs guns”
It makes no sense
One man’s terror’s another man’s defence
When the Holy Golden Toad spat him out of his mouth
The technobillionaire goblin was about KO’d out
But he left behind Big Balls like some vestigial tail
And them balls went to town and they got beat all to hell
Some days the DOGE-ing is easy, some days the DOGE-ing is hard
When the DOGE-ing don’t work, you’d better call in the guard
The citrus Caesar and the Theilian prince
Were throwing it all at the wall just to see what would stick
Even I got distracted, that weather was bad
That was the ICE-iest summer that I’ve ever had
Some days I forget that Cracker Barrels exist
But there ain’t no one forgetting about that list
It makes no sense
One man’s crime’s another man’s intelligence
The Nostradamus of Austin cried out to the lord
He said “them frogs might be gay but I’ll still be your sword”
While television anchors talked at the air
Does a lie make a noise if there ain’t nobody there?
“This ain’t no country for cable” said the wisest of men
Honey, crank up that Tucker while I pack me a zyn
It was getting kind of late so I went back to the morgue
They were doing the autopsy of July 4th
I said “hold the scalpel boys! She ain’t dead yet
I got a parlay on China, we can still win the bet”
The technician was drunk on Muskadine wine
He said “I’m going to Mars” I said “good riddance, goodbye”
It makes no sense
You can leave if you want, but, all your problems go with
:::
119 Comments
jontree255@lemmy.world · 188 pts · 1d
Charge him then. Fucking fascist twerp.
brownsugga@lemmy.world · 168 pts · 1d
"Exposed to" is not "charged with"
Jaysyn@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 1d
There very well could be Grand Juries seated in those states to do just that. You & I won't know until it happens.
eleijeep@piefed.social · 143 pts · 1d
Jesus Christ, no wonder his politics are fucked.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 86 pts · 1d
His grandfather was a double traitor who only cared for personal gain and money. He got what was coming to him.
Meanwhile he is following in his grandfather's footsteps by being a complete parasite and sack of shit to the country he lives in.
FiniteBanjo@feddit.online · 1 pts · 1d
His grandfather sounds based as fuck, I actually wonder how he turned out this way.
EDIT: Ya'll Tankies downvoting? I'll say it again. Fuck the USSR, they're no different than what MAGA aspires to be.
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 7 pts · 1d
MAGA...USSR...
Incompetent Party Oligarchs in palaces and bread/gas-lines for everyone else 🤝
FiniteBanjo@feddit.online · 2 pts · 1d
Can hardly wait for the De-Trumpinization on the same level as De-Stalinization.
nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 1d
I’m doubtful after 2020, that it will happen.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 7 pts · 1d
He spied on the US and the USSR. He was not some principled ideology. His ideological and moral compass only pointed towards money and nothing else.
FiniteBanjo@feddit.online · -1 pts · 1d
He was sent by the USSR, made deals with the FBI and CIA, moved his family to the states and was executed by the KGB for spying on the USSR.
Sounds like the ultimate redemption arc. We should all aspire to be so strong of will against tyranny.
Clearly he couldn't pass off the tiniest bit of it to his son and grandson before he died, sadly.
ewo@piefed.ca · 3 pts · 1d
Already are
FiniteBanjo@feddit.online · 2 pts · 1d
Only a self-deluded accelerationist would think this is the bottom. It goes much lower than this.
ewo@piefed.ca · 2 pts · 1d
Please explain
FiniteBanjo@feddit.online · -1 pts · 1d
The pitts of the Stalin regime held twice the percentage of incarcerated, multiple famines, no real elections, widespread war, etc. The USA isn't there yet but it will be.
kestrel7_7@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1d
The number of people the USA currently has in prison far outpaces the height of the gulag system in absolute numbers and percentage of the population. If you want to talk about famines you can check out how the USA treated indigenous people. To be frank, Stalin was small time compared to the USA, whether you’re talking historically or currently.
Reckless_Moose@ttrpg.network · 38 pts · 1d
LesserEvil? As in the popcorn with avocado oil seen in many health food stores? What?
Blackfeathr@lemmy.world · 37 pts · 1d
Yup. I boycott that brand hard and I tell everyone I know to stay away from it.
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 10 pts · 1d
Geeze, TIL.
I really hate that every cent we spend that doesn't go to like, struggling indie artists we enjoy, goes straight into the pockets of people actively obsessed with making our existence miserable.
ObtuseDoorFrame@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 1d
Dang. It's really good popcorn. Why couldn't he buy a worse brand...
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 1d
Right? This is more like classic Nestlé behavior.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 1 pts · 1d
Can you tell me why and what is so bad about it? I am legit interested in knowing. It isn't available in my area but I will avoid it if I see it.
Blackfeathr@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 13h
I boycott LesserEvil because BigBalls' dad is the CEO. I'm not gonna give more money to that twerp's family.
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 6 pts · 1d
I love(/s) how mask-off Fox is now. "Former KGB double-agent lineage put into high places of government when people still remember the Red Scare? Fiiiiine! Look he's so
rich🇺🇸🗽🦅🏈pAtRiOtIc. . .. . .REMEMBER WHEN OBAMA WORE A TAN SUIT THO AND MAMDANI HANDED SOMEONE A PEN?! THE OUTRAGE!! Shariah law! Immigrants! Reeee!!" [mouth foaming intensifies]
It feels like 50's-80's Republicans, still-evil as they were, would eat these bitches alive. LOL
As much as they screech about slippery slopes, it seems conservatism is the ultimate one. What vague notion of principles they might have had, erodes astonishingly quickly as soon as money and vulnerable children are dangled in front of them.
An opposition that lacks any kind of consistency doesn't deserve even the slightest respect.
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 1d
Shit apples don't fall far from the shit tree.
krashmo@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 1d
Damn straight Mr. Lahey
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 1d
thanks Randy
FiniteBanjo@feddit.online · -2 pts · 1d
Well damn, his gramps sounds amazing.
tburkhol@slrpnk.net · 85 pts · 1d
This is why you always want to get law enforcement credentials before doing fascist errands. Law enforcement gets qualified immunity; civilian contractors are patsies.
village604@adultswim.fan · 27 pts · 1d
Qualified immunity means that cops are protected from being personally targeted for civil lawsuits.
Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 47 pts · 1d
The effective immunity they de facto enjoy is MUCH more complete, though.
For every cop shooting where the cop suffers so much as an unpaid suspension, there's dozens if not hundreds that get off scot free after committing all crimes up to and including serial murder.
village604@adultswim.fan · 13 pts · 1d
I don't disagree, I was just correcting the wrong use of a term.
PalmTreeIsBestTree@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1d
They also can own pretty much any kind of firmarm in any state without any regulation.
Jax@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 1d
Oh, law enforcement ends up being above the law in many cases. For example, tinting on windshields in California. Cops get 100%, everyone else has to follow certain % rules so cops can feel safe during traffic stops. This is just a minor example.
NoForwadSlashS@piefed.social · 65 pts · 1d
Every time I see a picture of him, I think "Big Balls" must be one of those ironic nicknames.
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 72 pts · 1d
I remember some actual military veteran explaining that they almost never give the toughest fighters badass nicknames. You can kid around with guys with nicknames like 'Big Balls' or 'Killer' but run away from the guy they call 'Kitten' or 'Candy.'
Mostly_Gristle@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 1d
If the handful of veterans that I know are anything to go by, military nicknames are often directly related to the dumbest mistake they made during their enlistment.
j4yc33@piefed.social · 5 pts · 1d
It Runs the gamut. Some people get nicknames for skills, some for mistakes, and Others for the Most obscure reasons.
Not a Veteran myself, but a civilian who used to Work in defense. The Nickname Stories are Always fascinating though.
ayyy@sh.itjust.works · 9 pts · 1d
Did you spill soda on your shift key?
mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 1d
probably just helpful spell check. it capitalizes inappropriate words for me all the fucking time. don't know why I haven't bothered to turn it off
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 5 pts · 1d
Might be a non-english main language on the spellchecker. The german keyboard on my phone also wants to capitalize everything that might be a noun.
j4yc33@piefed.social · 5 pts · 1d
German Phone XD.
You win the thread! I would habe answered sooner but DB WiFi...
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 1d
A guy I knew said there was a guy he knew in the service who got the name "Stitch."
Oh cool, like, a medic or something?
Nah, he slipped and banged his dome on a bathroom sink so bad he needed stitches. 😂
Zahille7@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1d
I mean he looks like he's still in 7th grade, so it checks out imo.
Fishnoodle@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1d
Huge balls, tiny little pud
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 1d
RELATIVELY BIG BALLS.
Sordid_Seraphim@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 1d
It's his chosen name, his birth name is Tiny Testicles.
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus · 1 pts · 1d
I bet that he actually has big balls, but because of Chlamydia.
Just remembered Nicki Minaj's tweet which sent Trinidads health organizations onto a wild goose chase because she linked her STD-ridden guy to the COVID vaccine.
rain_enjoyer@sopuli.xyz · 63 pts · 1d
doge hellbent on putting the onion out of business
Gerudo@lemmy.zip · 58 pts · 1d
Did they not realize they would always be the fall guys?
Sludgehammer@lemmy.world · 36 pts · 1d
They're a bunch rich nepobabies who have failed upwards their whole life (as an example Swollen Testicles here is the heir to Lesser Evil snacks), they probably viewed this as yet another "smash and grab" corporate looting to use as a step up to their next jobs. I'm honestly skeptical that they'll end up as fall guys, after all the Trump administration has shown that crime is legal as long as you've got a R next to your name.
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 13 pts · 1d
Well that's irritating. Some of their popcorn is delicious.
I should have trusted my logic that a company called "Lesser Evil" is still admitting it's evil, its main selling point being "Our competition is more-er evil" ...
...presupposing that "Not evil" simply isn't an option in our socioeconomic system. Because of course.
tachikoma@lemmy.today · 14 pts · 1d
"You should never grade Evils, because if one is the worst, you might be tempted kinship with the least."
People don't think it is like it is. But it do . Sure reality has edge cases and exeptions... but yeee
MonkeMischief@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 1d
I've used that exact same Saltzpyre quote on Lemmy a few times too! NICE!
Even though he's a bit of a puritanical parody, that quote hits profoundly hard. Hi five. :)
LeonineAlpha@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 1d
"We can't take on MOM'S! They are big and evil, While we are small and... Neutral."
datavoid@sh.itjust.works · 29 pts · 1d
Does someone who calls themself "Big Balls" strike you as intelligent?
SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 10 pts · 1d
No, no they did not. They thought Daddy Musk and Daddy Trump would always be there for them.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 9 pts · 1d
No, they thought they were the cyberpunk hackers going against the evil government and they are all cool and underground and shit (even if they had the backing of the most powerful man in the country and the richest man on earth).
Tollana1234567@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 19h
thats why they chose graduates with no experience out of college/hs. its easier to manipulate.
Furbag@pawb.social · 49 pts · 1d
Every single one of them need lengthy prison sentences. "Just following Elon's instructions" should not be an adequate defense.
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 1d
oozynozh@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 1d
lmao what is this from
Twinklebreeze@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 1d
The Nice Guys
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1d
It’s already been answered but, if you haven’t seen it, watch The Nice Guys, that movie is so damned funny and good. Probably my favorite roles that both Ryan Gosling and Russell Crowe have ever done.
spizzat2@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 1d
The Nice Guys.
barooboodoo@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 1d
I believe it's from The Nice Guys, definitely worth a watch if you haven't yet.
floquant@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 1d
What about the guy who was giving the instructions?
Furbag@pawb.social · 4 pts · 1d
Sorry, rich people don't have to follow laws. Better luck next time, poor people!
SirMaple__@lemmy.ca · 47 pts · 1d
Aneb@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1d
I'm sorry I'm gonna need a name and link. If you have a .torrent that would simplify things
SirMaple__@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 1d
Inglourious Basterds
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inglourious_Basterds
hayvan@piefed.world · 45 pts · 1d
It's always the ones you expect the most.
Aneb@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 1d
Nacy Pelosi
SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de · 35 pts · 1d
please don't expose any big balls anywhere, thanks
Burn_The_Right@lemmy.today · 8 pts · 1d
...please don't expose any
bigconservative balls anywhere...FTFY (Some of us can appreciate a nice big pair of balls, as long as they aren't attached to something pure evil like a conservative.)
Impractical_Island@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1d
I don't anymore. The only balls I juggle are standard size. Also, I don't masturbate in my window anymore. These are two seperate things I'm talking about involving big balls. One is regarding how I used to juggle large bowling balls, the other is about how I used tp furiously masturbate in my window to all forms of pedestrians passing by. But, regardless, I am in compliance with your wishes and I want you to thank me for this.
Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works · 0 pts · 1d
Why?
anon_8675309@lemmy.world · 33 pts · 1d
Good. I hope he spills everything on Elon.
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca · 31 pts · 1d
He will be Epsteined before that happens.
skozzii@lemmy.ca · 22 pts · 1d
There is a reason they got a stupid naive kid to do their dirty work. He is the fall guy they can blame, and yes, if he spills the beans he will fall out of a window, or something or that nature.
Elon is happy, all the investigations against his companies have been stopped fully.
ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca · 13 pts · 1d
Window is Russia.
In the US, people shoot themselves in the back of the head.
nomy@lemmy.zip · 10 pts · 1d
I doubt this kid even has any dirt on Elon.
He was a stupid true believer who thought someone had finally recognized the genius he thinks he is and now its time for him to be hung out to dry.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 2 pts · 1d
In the US, people shoot themselves in the back of the head.Multiple times with their hands and feet tied up.
MumboJumbo@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1d
Probably too old
mattyroses@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 1d
I think they mean magic suicided, not child raped
OldChicoAle@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 1d
He looks like someone with very small balls tbh
Noite_Etion@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1d
Well projecting is their mo
frongt@lemmy.zip · -1 pts · 1d
How is this projecting?
tektite@slrpnk.net · 6 pts · 1d
If you project your balls they look bigger.
Noite_Etion@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1d
Yeah I felt that was obvious, maybe I wasn't' clear enough
Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 17h
They have to compensate somehow.
And if they aren't even old enough to drive, might as well be their name.
VinegarChunks@lemmus.org · 22 pts · 1d
He looks like the male version of the “Ehrmagerd” girl.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 7 pts · 1d
He looks like a deformed Harkonen mentant from David Lynch's Dune without the eyebrows.
Gates9@sh.itjust.works · 22 pts · 1d
Throw him to the Sarlacc
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 0 pts · 1d
The poor sarlacc will spit him out because he is so vile...
HubertManne@piefed.social · 21 pts · 1d
I look at things like this and figure that is why Im having a hard time finding work.
frongt@lemmy.zip · 20 pts · 1d
You have morals and ethics. It's a lot easier to make money without them
HubertManne@piefed.social · 3 pts · 1d
yeah you get this question about a difficult time and I have this story about someone being so crazy with timelines that they were going to do this really illegal thing and how I talked to the boss to talk to them and stopped it. Im starting to think that puts me on the no way list.
thunder@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 20h
The problem is you weren't born to rich parents.
kandoh@reddthat.com · -1 pts · 1d
When you send out a resume make sure it's ATS compliant. I have Claude rewrite each resume based on the job description posted so it triggers whatever software hr is using.
tauonite@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 1d
My name is Sir Donut Fucker Vibrating Butt Plug III but my friends call me John
naticus@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 1d
I'd piss myself if I said I had to go to the Sir Donut Fucker Vibrating Butt Plug III.
Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 3 pts · 17h
Ok Mr Piss Myself At Sir Donut Fucker Vibrating Butt Plug III, nice to meet you.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 2 pts · 1d
OK so you are John Sir Donut Fucker Vibrating Butt Plug III. Like THAT makes you special!
BurntWits@sh.itjust.works · 13 pts · 1d
::: spoiler The Ballad of Big Balls by Jesse Welles
WanderWisley@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1d
It’s always the ones who you suspect the most.
Jaysyn@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 1d
He and the rest of his cronies should die in prison after a long, unhappy life.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online · 3 pts · 1d
A long and unhappy life in prison to clarify.
end_stage_ligma@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1d
I don't want to wait that long to drink Baja Blast from their skulls
abbiistabbii@piefed.blahaj.zone · 8 pts · 1d
We live in the dumbest timeline.
obvs@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 1d
Of course he would like that.
Of course he would.
ContactClosure@lemmus.org · 5 pts · 1d
Excellent news. Now do Elon.
modus@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 13h
Sometimes the Doge'in is easy, sometimes the Doge'in is hard.
resipsaloquitur@lemmy.cafe · 3 pts · 1d
Oh no how unfortunate.
HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 1d
This is US not World
Jaysyn@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 1d
DOGE's aid cuts literally killed hundreds of thousands in developing countries.
It's nothing more than Depraved Heart murder with extra steps.
HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 1d
Ok good point
bitjunkie@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 1d
Good. Let him rot.