I was sitting in a Walmart parking lot in rural Iowa many years ago waiting for my inlaws to finish shopping. An older couple, probably early 60s, starts unloading their groceries into the station wagon next to me. The woman grabs a bottle of ranch from one of the bags, takes a long swig, screws the lid back on, tosses it into the trunk, and continues unloading the cart.
It was the most American thing I've seen outside of a jail cell.
As a Californian this is why the fly over states disgust me. At least when I'm weird with food it at least has two primary ingredients, like the nacho dog which is basically just taking a hot dog and dipping it in nacho sauce.
I'll never forget being in Charleston SC and eating two hot dogs, one with chili and coleslaw and the other with like fucking eight ounces of Mac and cheese.
They were also called like the Aretha Franklin and Frankie Muniz or some shit it was absolutely wonderful shout-out perfectly franks lol
Homemade ranch (or at least, mixed up on site for restaurants) can be really good. There’s a bar near me that serves a great ranch with their buffalo wings. The thick, globby stuff in the bottles never lives up to expectations.
Nothing wrong with thick, if it's got good flavor. I wish I had gotten Po' Folks (a southern food restaurant chain local to me) ranch dressing recipe before it went out of business during the pandemic. It actually had identifiable chunks of minced carrot etc. suspended in it.
I miss it so much, along with a few other things from that place, that I'm almost motivated to try to track down somebody who used to work there and remembers.
"That" ranch recipe, from that specific restaurant, is noticeably different from any ranch I've had anywhere else. Random southern-style ranch recipes aren't what I'm looking for.
This is not about ranch sauce specifically, but i found a good channel (FoodParables) which has a video for making your own ranch seasoning at home. If it's of interest. Linked on the channel name in brackets
some people have their lizard brains react very poorly to the amount of sugar and fat and salt that's inside modern hyper palatable food. i don't think many people necessarily want to get fat enough to be at risk for various diseases, it just happens to them. and there are also people more at risk for impulsive actions or less control over their actions, like people with adhd and autism.
a lot of the information on nutrition out there is also either pure propaganda or meant to muddy the waters, so sometimes for people who aren't very into nerding out over things it can be difficult to understand what good nutrition might be like.
A lot of the places use to much mayo when they mix and it ends up mayo sauce. I've heard good things about cutting down the mayo with sour cream though.
Idk about ranch, but sour cream works very well with anything tomato-based, with mild-ish hot sauces, or with mustard. It's preferable to not mix the two sauces too much, so they both can be felt on the tongue.
Or, you can mix sour cream with strawberry jam and dip pancakes into it. Better yet, wrap marinated mushrooms in crepes and dip that.
I know this is gonna sound weird but big trust me on this one chief:
Cream Cheese and A1 steak sauce. Use in a ratio of like 2 or 3 to 1 part A1. Don't mix it, just drizzle on top of the cream cheese. Works best on toasted bread or crackers.
Good as an appetizer for parties and gatherings. You can also sub the steak sauce for raspberry chipotle sauce, but I find A1 is easier to get.
Jimmy deans breakfast sausage in a tube sautéed, drain grease well, fry hot or sweet peppers plus onions in the pan. Mix in a crock pot and put on low till its melted. Then keep it on warm.
okay i'm gonna blow your mind. they got this stuff called labne. it's like sour cream and cream cheese fucked. it's absolutely delicious. you gotta try it
they really are the greatest utensil. I'd always wanted to scoop noodles directly into my mouth with my hands, but it was so unhygenic and I'd frequently get burned!
One of the many reasons research into the health effects of microplastic polution is so slow is because latex/vinyl gloves are themselves a source of microplastic contamination.
Really, these are great for most things and a dirt-cheap hygiene option too. Use them for potato chips, cheetos, cheeze-its... everything where you're tempted to lick salt/powder/sugar off of your fingers. Did we really learn nothing from the pandemic?
I know mine does it, but it could be a feature of the 4chanX extension? I haven't used 4chan without it in years. It's not direct quotes, but you click the number to see the post inline.
I just throw the nuggets in a large mixing bowl. Toss in a couple tbl of Gochujang, 1 tbl toasted sesame oil a tsp of honey, some sesame seeds, 2 tsp garlic powder, green onion, thin shallot, and a nice healthy dose of kosher salt. If I'm feeling fusiony, i'll swap the salt with Sazon seasoning.
Ends up sick because instructions didn't specify using clean dishes. Blames everyone else and cites it any time anyone tries to get him to do something for himself. This does not turn out well for him once his parents pass away.
93 Comments
IrateAnteater@sh.itjust.works · 97 pts · 142d
I never really understood the fascination with ranch that some people have.
adhocfungus@midwest.social · 74 pts · 142d
I was sitting in a Walmart parking lot in rural Iowa many years ago waiting for my inlaws to finish shopping. An older couple, probably early 60s, starts unloading their groceries into the station wagon next to me. The woman grabs a bottle of ranch from one of the bags, takes a long swig, screws the lid back on, tosses it into the trunk, and continues unloading the cart.
It was the most American thing I've seen outside of a jail cell.
Entertainmeonly@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 15 pts · 142d
Ranch it up bro!
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 13 pts · 142d
vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works · 11 pts · 142d
As a Californian this is why the fly over states disgust me. At least when I'm weird with food it at least has two primary ingredients, like the nacho dog which is basically just taking a hot dog and dipping it in nacho sauce.
SwifferWetjet@thelemmy.club · 2 pts · 127d
I'll never forget being in Charleston SC and eating two hot dogs, one with chili and coleslaw and the other with like fucking eight ounces of Mac and cheese.
They were also called like the Aretha Franklin and Frankie Muniz or some shit it was absolutely wonderful shout-out perfectly franks lol
hesh@quokk.au · 30 pts · 142d
Ranch is gross tbh
empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 43 pts · 142d
I've found that basically all commercial ranch (hidden valley) is mostly just soybean oil and doesn't taste like shit.
A local pizza joint to me has custom made ranch that is unironically amazing. YMMV.
hydrashok@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 142d
Homemade ranch (or at least, mixed up on site for restaurants) can be really good. There’s a bar near me that serves a great ranch with their buffalo wings. The thick, globby stuff in the bottles never lives up to expectations.
grue@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 142d
Nothing wrong with thick, if it's got good flavor. I wish I had gotten Po' Folks (a southern food restaurant chain local to me) ranch dressing recipe before it went out of business during the pandemic. It actually had identifiable chunks of minced carrot etc. suspended in it.
I miss it so much, along with a few other things from that place, that I'm almost motivated to try to track down somebody who used to work there and remembers.
Frozengyro@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 142d
You can Google and find results for that ranch recipe. Not sure how it compares to the original.
grue@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 142d
Got a link? I found one AJC article with a recipe for the tuna salad, which uses the ranch dressing as an ingredient, but it doesn't include a recipe for the dressing itself.
"That" ranch recipe, from that specific restaurant, is noticeably different from any ranch I've had anywhere else. Random southern-style ranch recipes aren't what I'm looking for.
RunJun@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 6 pts · 142d
Yup. I’ve never had a good mass produced Ranch. Homemade Ranch is crazy good.
saturn57@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 142d
Maybe this is just the American within me speaking, but I unironically enjoy comercial sauces. If it was disgusting, no one would buy them.
bran_buckler@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 142d
Is the local place Jet’s? People go crazy for their ranch around here
empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 5 pts · 142d
No it's a locally owned pizzeria that has a secret recipe. I've been told it's primarily a lard base.
FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 142d
I love ranch sauce.
This is not about ranch sauce specifically, but i found a good channel (FoodParables) which has a video for making your own ranch seasoning at home. If it's of interest. Linked on the channel name in brackets
finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 142d
I tried some Paul Newman's Ranch once, never having had ranch before. It was bloody awful!
snoons@lemmy.ca · 17 pts · 142d
Diplet detected.
Ranch is merely the primer for the second coating of whichever sauce you prefer.
FatVegan@leminal.space · 8 pts · 142d
I never understood the fascination with becoming as fat as possible
baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de · 11 pts · 142d
some people have their lizard brains react very poorly to the amount of sugar and fat and salt that's inside modern hyper palatable food. i don't think many people necessarily want to get fat enough to be at risk for various diseases, it just happens to them. and there are also people more at risk for impulsive actions or less control over their actions, like people with adhd and autism.
a lot of the information on nutrition out there is also either pure propaganda or meant to muddy the waters, so sometimes for people who aren't very into nerding out over things it can be difficult to understand what good nutrition might be like.
some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 141d
stickly@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 141d
Sugar has addictive properties, including withdrawal and relapse patterns similar to dependence forming drugs. It obviously doesn't affect everyone the same way, but a subset of people are at a much higher risk. Make them poor and put them in a sedentary society where all cheap food is made hyper-palatable with excess sugar and fat and...drumroll... they turn obese.
Shaming all fat people isn't much better than the old caricature of drunkard indigenous Americans. There's systemic issues at play.
Einskjaldi@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 142d
Really good freshmixed stuff is 3x better than generic store bought.
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 142d
A lot of the places use to much mayo when they mix and it ends up mayo sauce. I've heard good things about cutting down the mayo with sour cream though.
RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 142d
Its almost the same as the fascination the Japanese have with mayonnaise, honestly.
I guess its some kind of cultural palette thing.
apftwb@lemmy.world · 53 pts · 142d
ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml · 43 pts · 142d
At some point you gotta admit the nuggies are only there so you're not shoving spoonfuls of ranch down your gullet
nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 7 pts · 142d
bro that's disgusting
Alexstarfire@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 142d
Some people like nuggets. No need to shame.
kamenlady@lemmy.world · 39 pts · 142d
Diplet detected
Flax_vert@feddit.uk · 25 pts · 142d
Why do I want to try this now
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 142d
Because you touch yourself at night!
DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 142d
I feel seen.
chunkystyles@sopuli.xyz · 8 pts · 142d
...does that make it better for you?
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 142d
I touch myself during the day because a dick in my hand is super fucking hot. Usually its not mine but if thats all I got, I gotta get it.
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 141d
He says, as he has a profile pic of Andre the giant. Who's dick was said to be bigger than some peoples arms....
sees username
Oh....
RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 142d
Do we need to link you a suicide prevention hotline?
With eating habits like Anon, you're just asking for heart failure.
Wiz@midwest.social · 3 pts · 142d
Extremely slow suicide
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 142d
Socially acceptable suicide
RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 142d
Nah thats called living life normally. Anon's got the Fast Trak Frequent Flier Plan.
Flax_vert@feddit.uk · 2 pts · 142d
Only once
SlurpingPus@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 142d
Idk about ranch, but sour cream works very well with anything tomato-based, with mild-ish hot sauces, or with mustard. It's preferable to not mix the two sauces too much, so they both can be felt on the tongue.
Or, you can mix sour cream with strawberry jam and dip pancakes into it. Better yet, wrap marinated mushrooms in crepes and dip that.
RightHandOfIkaros@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 142d
I know this is gonna sound weird but big trust me on this one chief:
Cream Cheese and A1 steak sauce. Use in a ratio of like 2 or 3 to 1 part A1. Don't mix it, just drizzle on top of the cream cheese. Works best on toasted bread or crackers.
Good as an appetizer for parties and gatherings. You can also sub the steak sauce for raspberry chipotle sauce, but I find A1 is easier to get.
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 142d
Jimmy deans breakfast sausage in a tube sautéed, drain grease well, fry hot or sweet peppers plus onions in the pan. Mix in a crock pot and put on low till its melted. Then keep it on warm.
Big dippers
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 141d
okay i'm gonna blow your mind. they got this stuff called labne. it's like sour cream and cream cheese fucked. it's absolutely delicious. you gotta try it
Electric_Druid@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 142d
"diplet detected"
People will pick anything to act superior about, huh
Agent641@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 142d
Some people are just better at being Superior than others
NannerBanner@literature.cafe · 11 pts · 142d
I mean, that's basically the entire premise of any insult on 4chan. The original days had anything be an insult simply by appending '-fag' at the end.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 141d
chopsticks. you need chopsticks
EldenLord@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 141d
And coronary occlusion emergency surgery. Sooner or later.
djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 141d
they really are the greatest utensil. I'd always wanted to scoop noodles directly into my mouth with my hands, but it was so unhygenic and I'd frequently get burned!
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 141d
::: spoiler Click at your own risk but i have another solution for your unique problem.
:::
snoons@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 141d
One of the many reasons research into the health effects of microplastic polution is so slow is because latex/vinyl gloves are themselves a source of microplastic contamination.
SuspiciousCatThing@pawb.social · 4 pts · 141d
Why not fork?
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 141d
too much work to maintain a git
17jGuFCOn89iY@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 141d
A spoon seems the right choice considering how much sauce they want
dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 141d
Really, these are great for most things and a dirt-cheap hygiene option too. Use them for potato chips, cheetos, cheeze-its... everything where you're tempted to lick salt/powder/sugar off of your fingers. Did we really learn nothing from the pandemic?
Zamboni_Driver@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 141d
I just wash my hands before I eat things, but I guess everybody is different, good for you for coming up with a creative solution.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 141d
No and I refuse to learn anything from it I'm in statesia I have been very clear.
snoons@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 141d
Fyi some cultures in nhe middle east use their hands to eat all their food. They just make sure to wash up first.
IIRC a friend of mines first impression of a fork and knife was "such a waste of good metal".
MercuryGenisus@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 142d
This is next level science of dipping here.
silver@das-eck.haus · 14 pts · 142d
A scientist in his prime
FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 142d
Anon is so sauce-pilled that he buries th fkavour and texture of the actual nugget. He is PUNISHING himself
peteypete420@sh.itjust.works · 14 pts · 142d
The use of the cupcake tray for a dipping sauce tray is pretty great. Im always excited when my kitchenware has multiple purposes.
snoons@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 141d
It also gives you colon cancer isn't that cool
peteypete420@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 141d
Which dip? Surely not all of them.
sniggleboots@europe.pub · 13 pts · 142d
Remember, a thin paint will stick to a thick paint. Thanks, Bob Ross
NannerBanner@literature.cafe · 13 pts · 142d
Weird. Since when did 4chan (or any of its lookalikes) have quotation boxes?
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 10 pts · 142d
since always I think, you just hover over the post ID link and it inlines it (only while hovering, though)
kartoffelsaft@programming.dev · 8 pts · 142d
For basically any chan board when you hover over a ">>#######" it shows the post it points to.
anthropozaen@feddit.org · 2 pts · 142d
Maybe a browser addon which embeds it directly.
Hoimo@ani.social · 1 pts · 142d
I know mine does it, but it could be a feature of the 4chanX extension? I haven't used 4chan without it in years. It's not direct quotes, but you click the number to see the post inline.
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml · 11 pts · 142d
Im a double dipper because I never share my tendies
saturn57@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 142d
If your plate doesn't look like a pallet of paint after you've loaded it up, are you really living?
TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 142d
medium rare nuggies
kat_angstrom@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 142d
This is a sauce delivery system at peak efficiency.
OR3X@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 141d
ngl that picture looks unappealing af
LittleBorat3@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 141d
It's shot in anons cellar where he lives, the lighting isn't great
general_kitten@sopuli.xyz · 7 pts · 142d
id say most of the time whatever you are dipping is the secondary thing, you just want to eat the dip but eating it by itself is too overwhelming.
the right ratio of salsa to nacho is 2 parts salsa 1 part nacho so
2:1 ratio (by mass)
rumba@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 141d
shiii
I just throw the nuggets in a large mixing bowl. Toss in a couple tbl of Gochujang, 1 tbl toasted sesame oil a tsp of honey, some sesame seeds, 2 tsp garlic powder, green onion, thin shallot, and a nice healthy dose of kosher salt. If I'm feeling fusiony, i'll swap the salt with Sazon seasoning.
some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 141d
Imagine anon's face after trying your instructions, having accidentally cooked a whole meal on their own instead of mummy doing it
rumba@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 141d
There would be more green text.
Incidentally, I made that post before lunch and thought about it so much I went upstairs and made it :) Added cotija cheese and a big spoon of salsa.
I'm now partially comatose :P
Buddahriffic@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 141d
Ends up sick because instructions didn't specify using clean dishes. Blames everyone else and cites it any time anyone tries to get him to do something for himself. This does not turn out well for him once his parents pass away.
MashedTech@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 142d
That's why knowing physics and densities matter. It allows you to multi-dip without contamination.
Hello_there@fedia.io · 5 pts · 142d
Next-generation fatassery
DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 142d
If you think there's too much sauce, I counter with double and triple dipping, and also tongue.
QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 141d
Anon is fatter than God
snoons@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 141d
I can hear the struggled breathing and gasping speech patterns now.
LittleBorat3@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 141d
Is eating 20 nuggets per night the reason I have this?
QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 140d
No eating 40 is
Alpha71@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 142d
Man knows his dips and nuggies.
some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 141d
Soon he will also know doctors and medical bills
Cataphract@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 142d
This also holds true for things like breadsticks. Dip in marinara/pizza sauce first then garlic butter for the 2nd coating.