Gotta go sad!

835 points · 82 comments · view on lemmy.world

82 Comments

watson387@sopuli.xyz · 118 pts · 42d (9 replies)

Yeah. We're unhappy because your slow ass won't get out of the way! XD

UnCollaredCarrot@piefed.zip · 92 pts · 42d (6 replies)

starchylemming@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 42d

wow, this dude is everywhere!

FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 38d

When I notice the person behind me catching up, I move to the side so they can pass

daggermoon@piefed.world · 1 pts · 41d (3 replies)

I do it without realizing it. I'm clumsy, awkward, and I really am unaware of my surroundings.

Alkali@lemmy.ml · 21 pts · 41d (1 reply)

Just... Just don't walk in the center of every walkway.

watson387@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 41d

Exactly

tutter@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 41d

Practice looking around you when making a stop, an placing yourself to the side of a path instead of in the middle

DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 41d (1 reply)

You're just mad because we're in front.

watson387@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 41d

Nah. It's because you're so proud to be an obstacle.

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 72 pts · 42d (4 replies)

(but also: What if you were moving toward a light source? Wouldn't that mean you get to see faster? 🤔)

WanderingThoughts@europe.pub · 21 pts · 42d (1 reply)

The light you see would be blue shifted because of the speed you're going and become gamma rays for you. Radio waves would shift to visible light. So you would see radio.

If you would move that fast on the ground, you'd slam into air molecules at light speed, causing a huge shockwave like a continuous Hiroshima nuke going of. That would make you sad.

Dojan@pawb.social · 1 pts · 41d

If I were forced to see ABBA I'd welcome getting nuked.

lugal@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 42d (1 reply)

Any moth expert wanna comment on that now that it's moth month?

Gormadt@slrpnk.net · 13 pts · 42d

ceenote@lemmy.world · 50 pts · 42d (3 replies)

Do these fine gentlemen look unhappy to you?

Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 42d (2 replies)

My god! Look at their form.

HeHoXa@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 41d (1 reply)

He's cheating! Look! There's a hop, see?! There's another one!

ceenote@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 41d

You're not a race walker at all, you're nothing but a common jogger.

kaklerbitmap@lemmy.world · 37 pts · 42d

RoidingOldMan@lemmy.world · 33 pts · 42d

"People in a hurry are experiencing stress."

craftrabbit@lemmy.zip · 29 pts · 42d (9 replies)

--rant start--

I hate it I hate it such a shitty implication. This headline implies that walking fast makes you sad, but I'm willing to bet a lot that the study didn't actually find such a causal connection.

My guess is that the causal link is stress here. Stressed people walk faster and are also sad.

So make the headline say "scientists say stressed people walk fast" or something because someone will try walking slowly in hopes of that bringing happiness

--rant end--

bryophile@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 42d (2 replies)

I agree with your rant, this kind of title is annoying.

I do however also think that doing slow mindful walks will help against stress, so the implication that slow walking brings happiness is not a bad implication. Stressed out fast walking people really should try it. There's no reason to be in a hurry all of the time.

plyth@feddit.org · 0 pts · 42d (1 reply)

There’s no reason to be in a hurry all of the time.

Tell that to the Amazon warehouse workers.

bryophile@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 41d

Amazon benefits from workers who don't get stressed out too

boonhet@sopuli.xyz · 7 pts · 42d (2 replies)

But the headline doesn't imply a causal connection, it's your own bias that does

I read it and immediately assumed it's because stressed people walk faster

Wataba@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 42d (1 reply)

The tagline is still making a massive leap of logic to a clickbaity conclusion.

petrol_sniff_king@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 42d

No it's not. If I were to find you on a graph, the faster you walk, the unhappier I'd find you to be—that's what it's saying.

Now, the content of the article? I have no idea. I'm not reading it.

grrgyle@slrpnk.net · 3 pts · 42d

I didn't even think about taking the title seriously but now that you say it, it does sound ridiculous. I wonder if it's bait for people to come in explain causation (serious) to drum up engagement, or if it's actually just dumb.

DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 41d (1 reply)

Headlines to drive clicks, that's all it is.

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 41d

Women with round asses like seen here are more likely to walk quicker

NONE_dc@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 42d (3 replies)

Hmmm actually ☝️🤓
Sonic don't walk fast, he runs fast.

Because he's addicted to cocaine

tacosanonymous@mander.xyz · 11 pts · 42d (2 replies)

He’s not addicted. He can quit anytime he wants. He just really loves doing it.

fartographer@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 42d

Frequently checks if the smell changed

Dojan@pawb.social · 1 pts · 41d

That's reasonable. I've heard it's really good.

WereCat@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 42d

True. Walking fast makes me very unhappy with all the slow walkers

d00ery@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 41d (1 reply)

Analyses for specific causes of death showed that participants with low walking speed had about a threefold increased risk of cardiovascular death.

https://doi.org/10.1136/bmj.b4460

Gormadt@slrpnk.net · 8 pts · 41d

If I walk fast enough I can outrun death

SpaceCowboy@lemmy.ca · 18 pts · 41d

Yeah I'm unhappy about all these slow mother fuckers that are always in my way.

FuyuhikoDate@feddit.org · 17 pts · 42d (3 replies)

The problem with being faster than light is that you only see darkness...

OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 42d

Dam that's deep

Dotdashdot@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 42d

Depression must be fast af then…

plyth@feddit.org · 1 pts · 42d

... unless you follow the light, or run towards it.

Saapas@piefed.zip · 15 pts · 42d (1 reply)

It used to be that when my girlfriend and I were walking, she would always be rushing me by walking much faster. After starting my current job, I've become the fast walker, always having to slow down for her.

Uhhh I'm not sure I like the implication of this is

OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 42d

You know...

Pacattack57@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 41d

Idk I walk pretty fast and I’m pretty happy, aside from my crippling depression.

taiyang@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 42d

Depending on how slow the people in front of me are, I'm also more homicidal! At least Sonic has a lethal spin dash for such occasions.

DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 9 pts · 41d (2 replies)
workerONE@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 41d (1 reply)

Maybe cognitive decline makes you more happy

DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 0 pts · 41d

Seems to be working for you.

[if you're going to hand me an opening like that, don't get mad because I used it]

QualifiedKitten@discuss.online · 9 pts · 42d (2 replies)

So, you're telling me that if I just walk slower, I'll be happier?

marcos@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 42d (1 reply)

Have you tried just walking slower?

Dotdashdot@feddit.uk · 6 pts · 42d

Got yelled at by the twat behind me, wouldn’t recommend.

doingthestuff@lemy.lol · 8 pts · 41d (7 replies)

Some of y'all have never watched a 200kg / 440lb southern woman walk. She is not happy. And I'm not happy to be walking behind her.

Sabata11792@ani.social · 3 pts · 40d

Just travel with climbing gear.

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 41d

(insert your mom joke here)

Or really anything Bundy said in Married with Children while at work.

Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 41d (4 replies)

Never been to Africa so I wouldn't know. Or do you mean South America or Australia?

doingthestuff@lemy.lol · 4 pts · 41d (3 replies)

Southern US. Race doesn't matter. White, black, brown or whatever. The walk is the same. Not many 200kg women in Africa.

Axolotl_cpp@feddit.it · 0 pts · 40d (2 replies)

southern US

c/americandefaultism
(btw, do we have one? I should check after i write the comment ig)

doingthestuff@lemy.lol · -1 pts · 39d (1 reply)

The whole fucking world defaults to the US. But I don't know anyone that thinks of Africans or even Australians when they hear "southern". Granted, having lived in northern Germany among other places, they mean something different when they say the south and I'm sure other nations refer to their southern residents as southerners. But I'm guessing you knew what I meant and just wanted to be a dbag

Axolotl_cpp@feddit.it · 1 pts · 39d

The whole fucking world defaults to the US

I am sorry to tell you, but no

But I'm guessing you knew what I meant

Nope, why would i think about USA?, i thought it meant the southern hemisphere or smth (which pretty much confused me because i never hear a stereotype like that)

TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 8 pts · 42d

Now I know why I walk fast

undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch · 8 pts · 42d (4 replies)

Honestly I’ve been very conscious of this lately as a fast walker and it turns out even when I’m in the best mood it’s just fucking painful to walk slow. I feel the same way driving slow in a car with a turbo — the car wants to move fast.

bryophile@lemmy.zip · -2 pts · 42d (3 replies)

Are you able to meditate for more than a minute?

undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch · 3 pts · 42d (2 replies)

Yes?

bryophile@lemmy.zip · -2 pts · 42d (1 reply)

Maybe try that walking?

undefined@lemmy.hogru.ch · 2 pts · 41d

Maybe while hiking but I’m not going to be meditating walking around my city filled with people.

LoonyLenny@lemdro.id · 7 pts · 42d

Gotta go pee!

psx_crab@lemmy.zip · 7 pts · 42d (1 reply)

But in sonic world, happy people run fast, sad people skate.

embed_me@programming.dev · 1 pts · 41d

Knowing me I'd just be aware I have dementia and remember nothing else, feeling like shit

ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 42d (1 reply)

thatKamGuy@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 42d

Lemmy only accepts bespoke, artisanal, hand-crafted shitposts.

4grams@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 41d

Tracks, I walk so fast it makes people upset with me. I just hate wasting time, why not get where you are going quickly. I’m also deeply unhappy.

wowwoweowza@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 41d

said… people content to be slow? Or… might these be… most kindly… and not shaming anyone… lazy assed bitches?

Lanske@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 41d

This must be. I always walk fast or even run and im sad as fuck

tacosanonymous@mander.xyz · 3 pts · 42d (2 replies)

This can’t be true although I only have anecdotal evidence to back up my claim.

It’s me. I’m unhappy and a very slow walker.

avg@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 42d

Correlation does not imply causation, in this case it doesn't mean that sad people walk fast. A few years ago there was a similar study that said that people that walked faster were healthier or something, the reality was that younger people walk faster, they also happen to be healthier than older people.

In this case, it's entirely possible that younger people are fucking depressed due to the state of everything.

plyth@feddit.org · 1 pts · 42d

Have you measured? Maybe you walk fast, or you are happy ...

/s

JATtho@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 41d (1 reply)

Only until you are running so fast the runner's high kicks in and you are in heaven.

Mountainaire@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 41d

I've almost never felt that, sadly.

I guess I could remove the comma from there.

DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 41d

So much anger from the fast walkers. Hmm.

FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 38d

I've noticed anger makes me go faster when I'm walking or on the exercise bike