c/lemmyshitpost · by Gork@lemm.ee · 2yShart, not fart 1.1k points · 199 comments · view on lemmy.world
199 Comments
FooBarrington@lemmy.world · 83 pts · 2y
Condom, never used.
Nikls94@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
Used mine twice.
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 2 pts · 2y
random_character_a@lemmy.world · 64 pts · 2y
Musk still rich
chevy9294@monero.town · 58 pts · 2y
My Arch broke.
Johanno@feddit.org · 16 pts · 2y
Use nixos
umbrella@lemmy.ml · 13 pts · 2y
explodicle@sh.itjust.works · 56 pts · 2y
Back to work.
Etterra@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y
Here's our winner.
GreatAlbatross@feddit.uk · 10 pts · 2y
Back to office.
TheDeepState@lemmy.world · 54 pts · 2y
Reddit still going.
feebl@feddit.nl · 52 pts · 2y
For sale: baby
Chekhovs_Gun@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 2y
shoes never worn
feebl@feddit.nl · 2 pts · 2y
You forgot the comma after shoes but: bingo, that's the one!
Agent641@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
Boy or girl?
udon@lemmy.world · 36 pts · 2y
Aufenthaltserlaubnisverlängerungsantragsfrist verpasst.
Eiri@lemmy.world · 40 pts · 2y
German is cheating!
Vailliant@lemmy.world · 31 pts · 2y
Alarm clock ringing
Enkrod@feddit.org · 31 pts · 2y
In our bed?!
hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 30 pts · 2y
Liberty is kil
nebulaone@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
no
deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz · 26 pts · 2y
Good dog, stay.
CertifiedBlackGuy@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 2y
You fucker :(
deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz · 15 pts · 2y
I made myself sad writing that.
udon@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 2y
Actually, it's GNU/Linux
_____@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y
I love to say this sassily and where it doesn't fit just because "guh noo" sounds funny
Chakravanti@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 2y
That's not sad.
udon@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y
it's a glimpse into a sad life
Chakravanti@lemmy.ml · 6 pts · 2y
I'm not sad.
NoMoreCocaine@lemmynsfw.com · 3 pts · 2y
He didn't make an evaluation of someone's personal feelings. MAGA heads might not feel sad, but it's still a sad life from outside perspective.
SteveXVII@pawb.social · 26 pts · 2y
Donald Trump exists
KingJalopy@lemm.ee · 20 pts · 2y
It said a sad story, not a fucking nightmare. There might be kids reading this, don't scare them!
SteveXVII@pawb.social · 8 pts · 2y
It's a German fairytale. (I wish.)
Default_Defect@midwest.social · 6 pts · 2y
German inspired.
tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 2y
Drumpf
cosmictrickster@lemmy.world · 26 pts · 2y
Four more years.
GluWu@lemm.ee · 26 pts · 2y
I loved you
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 2y
"She preferred him."
I don't think I like this game.
Aceticon@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 2y
"a sad story"
psycho_driver@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
And here we have the iq test high scorer.
null@slrpnk.net · 24 pts · 2y
Need baby shoes?
doleo@lemmy.one · 9 pts · 2y
That you, Hemmingway?
null@slrpnk.net · 7 pts · 2y
Yes, it's an abridgement of the most mundane 6 word story:
For sale: baby shoes, too small.
Wes4Humanity@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y
Isn't it: For sale: baby shoes, never worn
null@slrpnk.net · 7 pts · 2y
That's the saddest 6 word story.
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 1 pts · 2y
Is this Loss?
Wes4Humanity@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
Not sure if you're just doing the prompt or really asking, but I've never heard the 6 word story given a name, so I'm not sure
sockenklaus@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 2y
But how is this a sad story? Babies grow so fast that they easily can skip a size... Am I missing the point?
And, wouldn't this be the real sad story? "For sale, baby shoes, too big"
Implying that the baby died before it could grow into said shoes?
doleo@lemmy.one · 7 pts · 2y
Yes, a little. The original was: For sale, baby shoes, never worn.
null@slrpnk.net · 3 pts · 2y
It's decidedly not sad -- I specifically said it was the most mundane 6 word story.
slaacaa@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
then who was shoe?
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 2y
*Hemmmingway
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Stained baby shoes
doleo@lemmy.one · 24 pts · 2y
endless economic growth
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 5 pts · 2y
Malignant profit-driven cancer.
cordlesslamp@lemmy.today · 24 pts · 2y
The condom broke.
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 2y
deleted by creator
Agent641@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 2y
Trump's third term.
buddascrayon@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 2y
This is more of a horror story
VonReposti@feddit.dk · 22 pts · 2y
You tested positive.
itsgoodtobeawake@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 2y
It wasn't milk
VOwOxel@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 2y
Non-Milk Substance
idiomaddict@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 2y
We never learn
Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 2y
Squeezing cheeks. Urgent!
udon@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 2y
Tight couch, ouch!
Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 2y
Humble brag Vance
(cheating? Using his name automatically makes everything sad)
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y
Couch with a zipper,
never've been deeper.
Couch with a spring
will hit you in the thing.
- intellectual thoughts with DJ Vasectomy or whatever some Amurican eyeliner boytoy is called
fross@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Weird intersectional porn.
absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz · 17 pts · 2y
Technically not cannibalism!
Got_Bent@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 2y
She died first
Somsphet@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 2y
Now I'm sad
nicknonya@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 17 pts · 2y
baby, no shoes
0laura@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y
no shoes, baby....
garbagebagel@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Never shoes, baby
nicknonya@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 6 pts · 2y
baby, never worn
Mr_Blott@feddit.uk · 16 pts · 2y
gnutrino@programming.dev · 8 pts · 2y
No, more cheese!
PrimeMinisterKeyes@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 2y
Can't escape capitalism.
Letsdothis@lemmy.world · -2 pts · 2y
Where would one go? Socialism?
jupyter_rain@discuss.tchncs.de · 15 pts · 2y
Cat hates you.
Takios@discuss.tchncs.de · 7 pts · 2y
The worst fate.
rockerface@lemm.ee · 14 pts · 2y
Still no sleep
blackn1ght@feddit.uk · 14 pts · 2y
burnt my toast
Trainguyrom@reddthat.com · 4 pts · 2y
I'm on a toast kick and that hit harder than it should. A couple of other toast themed ideas:
Toast got cold Toast without butter
psycho_driver@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
Toast without butter is more in the vein of torture porn.
lath@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 2y
Brown bathroom walls.
Generalteetius01@sh.itjust.works · 9 pts · 2y
Thai chili curry.
udon@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
this burns twice
OmegaMouse@pawb.social · 14 pts · 2y
Out of coffee
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y
Captain initiates auto-selfdestruct.
CptEnder@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 2y
Toothpaste orange juice
dalekcaan@lemm.ee · 13 pts · 2y
The prompt said sad, not horror
pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 13 pts · 2y
Want to KMS?
No, better
Failed suicide attempt
Noodle07@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 2y
Suicide attempt 12
pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 7 pts · 2y
If you're on number 12 and still here you're lifes a comedy, not a tragedy
Noodle07@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
Oof
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 2y
Maybe you're immortal
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 2y
Task failed successfully
nebulaone@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 2y
Yeah for real
Snoopey@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 2y
War never changes
Cordyceps@sopuli.xyz · 13 pts · 2y
God creates man
m0darn@lemmy.ca · 12 pts · 2y
Dead Harambe timeline
superduperpirate@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y
Out of tacos
bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de · 11 pts · 2y
Remembering cringey memories.
c0smokram3r@midwest.social · 4 pts · 2y
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 2y
Remember when you
Arigion@feddit.org · 11 pts · 2y
Can't count to three.
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 11 pts · 2y
Cells dividing uncontrollably.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 2y
Mine is autobiographical. It is based on a horrific event that happened to me this morning:
Dog poo finger
BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Oh no.
boonhet@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y
This isn't 3 words, but I know players of Elden Ring would suggest that you:
Try finger but hole
andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 2y
Welcome to Jonestown
Agent641@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y
Grandmother at twenty.
Letsdothis@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 2y
Egads! This is quite terrible when you realize the implications.
Exusia@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y
Dick went flaccid.
LazerFX@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 2y
Been there too
son_named_bort@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 2y
Bent my wookie
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 10 pts · 2y
You were late
CompN12@lemmy.frozeninferno.xyz · 9 pts · 2y
MehBlah@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
This isn't sad.
prayer@sh.itjust.works · 9 pts · 2y
Shaka, walls fell.
nebulaone@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 2y
Mutually assured destruction
Etterra@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
Your wife died.
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
You're under arrest.
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 8 pts · 2y
The cancer's back
Takios@discuss.tchncs.de · 8 pts · 2y
I swallowed shampoo
Thebular@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Probably gonna die
bruhduh@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
Want fart, afraid
SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
My poop red
c0smokram3r@midwest.social · 1 pts · 2y
popekingjoe@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
This is more of a horror story than a sad one.
Anyway...
"It was yours."
divergency@scribe.disroot.org · 8 pts · 2y
Trainguyrom@reddthat.com · 2 pts · 2y
Hey don't threaten me with a good time!
Letsdothis@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
Dick don't work
RawrGuthlaf@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 2y
Forced ad watching.
Resol@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
Queer Moroccan. End.
loaExMachina@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 2y
chevy9294@monero.town · 7 pts · 2y
Third world war.
Eiri@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
Friends, family... Gone!
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 2y
Diced, spiced... Grilled!
sockenklaus@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 2y
New motorcycle, tetraplegia.
udon@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2y
Crowdstrike strikes crowd
MehBlah@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y
Chewing aluminum foil.
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 6 pts · 2y
Is this Loss?
BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y
Pregnant at 55.
PlantDadManGuy@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y
Globe is warming.
Wes4Humanity@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y
Please come home
dactylotheca@suppo.fi · 6 pts · 2y
Still not dead
Bassman1805@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 2y
Alas, still depressed
Wes4Humanity@lemm.ee · 6 pts · 2y
Please God no
Kolanaki@yiffit.net · 5 pts · 2y
I wanna die.
blackn1ght@feddit.uk · 5 pts · 2y
I wonder which of these answers in the thread give genuine locations on what 3 words...
SoGrumpy@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 2y
None that I tried.
cohete@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
It's not yours
Pulptastic@midwest.social · 5 pts · 2y
I was sad.
Oh no, anyways...
Tabula_stercore@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
triumvirate
(It's a "three" word)
udon@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
joke needs explanation
sfxrlz@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Please don’t forget
fossilesque@mander.xyz · 5 pts · 2y
Desistance@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Cooking fell over.
filtoid@lemmy.ml · 5 pts · 2y
45 and 47
No_Ones_Slick_Like_Gaston@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Weird and Sad!
Surp@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 2y
Your cat died
MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 2y
So long, friend.
TheMightyCanuck@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 2y
Crib for sale
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
The kid outgrew it? I guess that's still kind of sad in a "Butterfly Kisses" kinda way.
TheMightyCanuck@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 2y
If it was 5 words, 'crib for sale; never used'
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 2y
Trafficked by mum
Num10ck@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2y
expired inner child
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 2y
Don't love him
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 2y
You're not hired
captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 2y
Water pipe burst.
tweeks@feddit.nl · 4 pts · 2y
text without punctuation
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 4 pts · 2y
(Just realised "I use Arch" cannot be written using only three words, weird)
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 2y
The house's gone
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 2y
They were young
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 3 pts · 2y
undeleted by administrator
Toneswirly@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Gone and forgotten
JackbyDev@programming.dev · 3 pts · 2y
I am sad.
kambusha@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 2y
Dog leaves room.
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 2y
Cat leaves lap.
PenisDuckCuck9001@lemmynsfw.com · 3 pts · 2y
The only time in my entire history of dating where I got invited into her house, I took a shit in the toilet and clogged it so hard it overflowed when I flushed.
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 2y
Took the kids
Slovene@feddit.nl · 3 pts · 2y
In the melody of It's Raining Men it sounds awesome.
"Toilet water rising.
The streets will overflow."
HowManyNimons@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Can't afford treatment.
lostme@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Tell my wife...
HowManyNimons@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
Only getting older.
MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml · 3 pts · 2y
Major data loss
problematicPanther@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
still they remain.
ngn@lemy.lol · 2 pts · 2y
mounting rootfs failed
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 2y
Blinds raise more
livingcoder@programming.dev · 2 pts · 2y
Everyone wore black.
SirQuackTheDuck@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2y
That's just a metal concert though
RandomVideos@programming.dev · 2 pts · 2y
There was a really cool story, but it had to be cut down so it could fit in the 3 word limit.
...destroyed...house...lost...
psycho_driver@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Tried but died.
SzethFriendOfNimi@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
Baby shoes, sold
ArmokGoB@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 2y
O, no right
Blinchik@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
a sad story using only 3 Words
anindefinitearticle@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 2y
Frid0lin@feddit.org · 1 pts · 2y
Fist pump, bro
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
Toilet rise watering.
mobilehugh@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 2y
Not my leg.
rothaine@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
Hi hi
We're your plumber girls (uh huh)
And have we got news for you (you better listen!)
Get ready all you plumbing girls
And leave that poop knife at home!
Toilet water rising
Confidence getting low (how low girl?)
According to my estimate
This shit's gonna overflow
WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2y
https://youtu.be/4sew7y_RfmY
RavenofDespair@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 2y
Dropped my ice-cream
Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
Weird men rule.
Blinchik@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee · 1 pts · 2y
Mustache jizz giveaway
MHanak@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2y
No wheels, cardboard
blujan@sopuli.xyz · 1 pts · 2y
Baby adoption: cancelled