Inside the fiery, deadly crashes involving the Tesla Cybertruck: Cybertrucks have locked passengers inside and burned so hot they’ve disintegrated drivers’ bones.

Good point. Back to the drawing board.

It... also costs 100k

Edit: sorry, sorry, 70k — much better

Or dispose of evidence.

you're right. no one would believe that

Chances of you experiencing the apocalypse - Zero

Chances you will get trapped in an Cybercuck and be unable to get out - Not zero

Cybertrucks are 17 times more likely to kill you in a fiery way than the Ford Pinto, the previous record holder.

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2025/02/report-cybertruck-safety-ford-pinto/

With 'murican healthcare prices the fatality rate is a feature.

But maybe they have the lowest crash rate?
So like, crashes cost money right? Someone is responsible. Someone has to pay.
But if everyone dies in an inferno, then nobody is responsible. Who can pay? They're all dead! What medical bills? What repairs? It's all a write off.
Sounds like a high mortality rate with low accident rate is an absolute profitable win! Free market baby!

My wife and I are in need of a truck since we moved to a rural area and need one for stuff like trash disposal and whatnot. We've decided to get something practical like a hundai santafe or honda ridgeline

The reason to eliminate door handles that Tesla and others typically give is aerodynamic efficiency. Granted there are other bigger aerodynamic problems. gestures at the rest of the fucking truck

It looks like a DeLorean model that refused to render properly

Lmao

looks like a DeLorean

It is a "Deplorean"

Fires that entrap passengers are a well-documented and recurring problem with every model in Tesla’s lineup of vehicles

How is this a perfectly valid statement about the worlds richest man's car company without us beating him to death with hammers/ seeing how many of those baseball sized steel balls he can handle?

“Unique” here refers to the fact that every other car is built pretty much the same way in as much first responders are concerned, and that makes them predictable and fairly easy to get out of while cybertrucks are strong enough and door-handleless enough to be incredibly dangerous(while also not being strong enough to do most of what they promise).

You could almost say it's like being put into an oven.

CaaS

Feature, not a bug.

It will be monetised soon enough

You have 30 seconds to escape your car
You have 10 seconds
Your car has been incinerated
Your car has burned your bones to ash
You have 30 minutes to collect your ash

Not all of them act the same way. We have the hidden handles on our 26 Equinox EV but it still pivots open if you press on the opposite side of pulling to act as a normal handle.

I daily a Fiero and don't think even at its worst point people burned inside trapped without handles.

its also a 100k coffin with a built in charcuterie machine, that can slice VENISON in half.

creep cremator

Disposable too

Wasnt there a maga dude that blew up his cybertruck in front of a hotel?

So much has happened last few years.....

Mars project cancelled, now aiming for moon Nebraska.

Yeah, that happens at purchase.

How in the fuck did a truck without a manual override for exiting the vehicle ever make it to market? Everything is broken.

Wasn't the point that the cyber hammer couldn't hurt the truck?

Perhaps if we were just talking Teslas in general, but the cybertruck? I can't imagine any non-assholes buying and driving those. That thing is a statement, a fascist "own-the-libs" statement in particular.

Anybody that bought a cyber truck did so knowing full well Elon is a Nazi. They made their bed and now they can lie in it. No compassion at all for these selfish fucks.

I disapprove the Schadenfreude comments, but this is not merely a "vehicle most people don't like". It is a dangerous vehicle unnecessarily threatening health and even live of other members of the community, especially of children. There is a reason why it is not street legal in the EU.

anyone that bought a cybertruck did so knowing full well that it's a giant "fuck everybody but me" vehicle

I have no sympathy for them. their victims, yes. the owner, not at all.

Just to be clear so people don't think they are protected when they're not: those window strikers ONLY work if your car windows are TEMPERED glass. They are 100% useless on laminated glass. The Cybertruck's "unbreakable Armor Glass" is laminated.

‘Ere little darlin’ — don't shed no tear.

No, no body, no crime.

Hey hey, just few years ago lefties were religiously buying teslas made by their prophet. What changed?

"sorry but i wont climb into your death trap. i will wait for the next available driver."

I do this every time I see one of those dorks driving one around.

+$599 Tesla Seatbottom Urn available in 2 colors.

Think like Steve Jobs. No buttons.

Because consumers are impressed by pointless bullshit on cars.

That depends.

Is the driver Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?

Unluckly, choosing big cars with very strong/resistant materiais as daily driver means any recklessness that results in accidents involving other drivers are more letal for the smaller car.

So choosing a cybertruck probably means you have better survival chances in crashes against smaller cars in general.

No you just rebrand it a built-in crematorium.

Ford pinto hold my beer

Damn near 100% of the owners. The Nazimobiles came out after Elon needed all that Saudi money to get him out of the hole he dug saying he'd buy Twitter and in turn started amplifying chud propaganda on Twitter at their request. Anyone with a preorder had an opportunity to cancel and get their money back to not support a fascist. Fuck 'em. Let them eat fire.

Ah, I see you are a fan of child bbqs. Those damn kids in the back deserve to suffer for the crimes of their parents after all.

The one thing you are forgetting... Is that Tesla lobbies the regulatory agencies.

For another comparison, the cyber truck is 17 times more likely to burn you to death than the Ford Pinto, a car that is practically synonymous with fire.

That is not how it works in the EU. The Cybertruck has never been street legal here, for a reason.

Only 60,000 Cybertrucks have been sold. Not "half a million."

While the total number of deaths from fire may seem insignificant to you, it is a far greater death rate than major auto manufacturers usually tolerate.

In the 1970s, Ford had to recall the Pinto over 27 deaths out of 1.5 million units sold. That's 18 deaths per million units.

Cybertrucks are sitting at five known fire deaths per 60,000 units sold. That would be a ratio of 83 deaths per million units.

I see people make this point a lot but it's not about the number of deaths. It's about the manner in which they die. It's horrifying.

I have to say I am sick of having to give a safety briefing to passengers when they get a ride.

"If we crash and burn, the manual release is behind there" points

Why didnt they just put regular bloody handles on!?

Is this a joke? Who is this for? The same people who live in the resident evil house?

Children are normally in the back of a vehicle, please tell us the secret door with a fucking rip cord in it is somehow normal and the cooked children where clearly a "skill issue".

Chevrolet had the same problem. Boomers baked to death in their Corvettes because the battery died.

Well, the kid would have to be able to release the seatbelt either... But I would not be surprised that no one would teach the kid to do it anyways...