But instead of impaling you they just sort of... Squish up against you. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't even feel bad. In fact, you're starting to kinda like it...
Having grown Oysters, and Shiitakes before wondering why these are all growing towards the floor... typical mushrooms I'm aware of still orient towards a light source despite not needing it for food just to ensure their spores are spread properly....
Were they flipped? Does the green floor have something to do with it? Is it fake?
Are oysters and shiitakes easy? I did Teachers and they were soooooo simple, it was fascinating! It’d be nice to have some just to eat for yum and not expedience.
Oysters are probably the easiest edibles to grow. Shiitakes on the other hand, I am just cursed even though they shouldn't be hard. If you had success with Teachers, Oysters aren't a problem.
Thank you, I’ll look into that! I’d love more stuff at home that I can make vegan meals with for friends who don’t eat animal products (and I just love eating mushrooms!)
Are teachers that easy? I've only ever done albino tidal waves, and not only do they take like 6 months to grow but they always find a way to fuck something up and I end up with 10 grams per canopy. Life is suffering with ATWs.
Oh yah, all it takes is a plastic tub with a latching lid and a fine mist spritzer! The first time I did super poorly but had pins in a couple weeks, and got a couple flushes (which I harvested way too late.)
Another try and the first flush was WAY more thicc, got about seven flushes over the course of two or three months before I stopped them. Just threw em in a room with no special light or anything, just spritzed twice a day or so. Barely touched them or did anything, just went in to wet em a little and admire them occasionally. They were extremely self-sufficient!
Took ages to dry, but once completely dried out, easily 120+g total from the second batch!
If you order a spawn block of shiitake or oyster they are pretty easy indoors in my experience. Outdoor shiitake making my first attempt wont likely know until fall of 2027
I used dowel plugs instead of sawdust as first attempt so a bit slower but easier to avoid contamination from what I read. Also depends on the size of the logs, weather conditions, how heavily you inoculate, etc. Have a winter season here where the shiitakes are likely to go dormant. Might see something earlier than that but if I don't see anything by winter 2027 will assume it has likely failed. If it goes well should have a number of years of production though.
... at least not without first asking the fungal gestalt consciousness for consent first.
Ok, also, someone needs to overlay this with the green screened, joe pesci 'what the fuck is this piece of shit?' shot/reverese shot thing.
This, but not shit tier quality:
you'd need a second background image but yeah
... maybe use a shot of the infinite hallway of literal 'backdoors' from the 2nd/3rd matrix movies, i think that would work, just color grade it a bit.
Understandable, they're neither animals nor plants, and at least to me, that's really weird. Pretty much everything large enough to see fits into those categories, and it just feels like fungi should be plants as well.
I just googled a bit about this topic and learned algae is also not a plant. But it's green!
Honestly I would've thought the track Metal Monks (BoS theme) would fit better what with my profile picture being Pelinal Whitestrake a literal crusader and cyborg a metal monk if you will.
mushrooms are just eucaryotic species that never bothered to develop legs or brains (and also no photosynthesis) . if they want to go somewhere, they either grow a thin wire to get there or throw a million spores into the air and hope that one lands where it should be going to.
Fun fact, it's very likely that without mushrooms land animals wouldn't exist. More controversially it's possible that without mushrooms no creatures with higher order thinking like human variants could exist.
As to the second part, while it's controversial in some circles that lean heavily toward divine creation or intervention, the Stoned Ape Theory is nonetheless pretty well supported. As for my exact wording; I'm also including dolphins, which do recreational drugs anyway, and suggesting outside popular theories there's a sea fungus they've keyed in on in the past, as well as octopi who like to get high, even crows like a little chemical help now and again. While we don't have direct evidence of non-ape species being particularly into eating fungus for its mind altering effects, the fact that pretty much every 'intelligent' species seems to enjoy recreational mind-altering drugs does point to a common origin for intelligence itself.
xD but for the fungus to activate these parts of the brain that form language etc, these parts would have to be there in the first place. it doesn't make much sense to develop a brain and then depend on external substances to activate them. also it would be a huge disadvantage to not just always enable them, which nature surely could have done, and probably did.
Stop taking Science as a religion. Questioning theories is the foundation of science. If there is an answer, somebody will be happy to provide it. If there is none then we have to look more closely.
The presidential micro penis wall, now at 40X zoom for all your viewing pleasures. The registry starts after WW3 during the dictatorship of the one pedo called orange. Today in 5673 we can only thank our ancestors for our very large penises. After only a few thousand T presidential specimens a new family took over such that today we have advanced cellphone technology! We have even developed "thecar"!
This is actually kind of interesting to me because I hadn't ever considered they would be grown vertically like that as opposed to racks stacked on top of each other.
i hope it's at least somewhat ventilated otherwise i'd recommend immediately getting an adrenaline syringe or you won't be able to breathe for the next 3 weeks
These mushrooms aren't black mold or some other toxic variation. While its not really healthy to be in these rooms for too long, its not that different from a really dusty area like a sawmill.
They don't look like shrooms at all... like not even a little bit. You're either lying or grew some other kind of mushrooms that isn't psychoactive, because none that are look like that.
133 Comments
JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 150 pts · 73d
Penis
Karmanopoly@lemmy.world · 129 pts · 73d
anonymouse2@sh.itjust.works · 9 pts · 73d
Hats off to your lady-friends
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 72d
... Speed run challenge of hanging a hat on each one.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 72d
Fetus@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 73d
I'm envious.
ignotum@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 73d
Like Freud predicted you would be
LillyPip@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 72d
Master understatement.
M137@lemmy.today · 0 pts · 72d
Opening the post and seeing only the image and your comment just sent me, thanks for the laugh!
ggtdbz@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 145 pts · 72d
Finally. The mush room.
Resonosity@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 8 pts · 72d
Take my upvote...
mtpender@piefed.social · 81 pts · 73d
Ah yes, the Great Wall of Dong.
anomnom@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 72d
More like great hall of
vaginadong.JackiesFridge@lemmy.world · 81 pts · 72d
Online dating
cannedtuna@lemmy.world · 76 pts · 73d
It almost looks like you’d expect the walls to start closing like one of those spiked wall traps.
pipes@sh.itjust.works · 55 pts · 73d
Womb Raiders
Agent641@lemmy.world · 46 pts · 73d
But instead of impaling you they just sort of... Squish up against you. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't even feel bad. In fact, you're starting to kinda like it...
SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social · 6 pts · 72d
Then they start jizzing all over everything
OddMinus1@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 72d
Mush pit.
plutopos@lemmy.zip · 46 pts · 73d
The penis corridor
PrimeMinisterKeyes@leminal.space · 51 pts · 73d
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 9 pts · 72d
today i learned i comprehend spanish
ultrafastsloth@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 73d
Cockridor
JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca · 14 pts · 72d
I'm sorry, but it's obviously corridong
KuroiKaze@lemmy.world · 38 pts · 72d
Every hot girls DMs be like...
sober_monk@lemmy.world · 29 pts · 72d
INeedANewUserName@piefed.social · 22 pts · 73d
Having grown Oysters, and Shiitakes before wondering why these are all growing towards the floor... typical mushrooms I'm aware of still orient towards a light source despite not needing it for food just to ensure their spores are spread properly....
Were they flipped? Does the green floor have something to do with it? Is it fake?
hanke@feddit.nu · 33 pts · 73d
Could it be good ole gravity? Growing too far out from the wall to support their own weight properly?
rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 73d
It seems to be legit.
LillyPip@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 72d
Yeah, it seems very likely to be their weight.
socsa@piefed.social · 10 pts · 72d
They just need someone to spit on them and call them dirt.
Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 72d
Are oysters and shiitakes easy? I did Teachers and they were soooooo simple, it was fascinating! It’d be nice to have some just to eat for yum and not expedience.
renrenPDX@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 72d
Oysters are probably the easiest edibles to grow. Shiitakes on the other hand, I am just cursed even though they shouldn't be hard. If you had success with Teachers, Oysters aren't a problem.
Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 72d
Thank you, I’ll look into that! I’d love more stuff at home that I can make vegan meals with for friends who don’t eat animal products (and I just love eating mushrooms!)
OozingPositron@feddit.cl · 3 pts · 72d
Are teachers that easy? I've only ever done albino tidal waves, and not only do they take like 6 months to grow but they always find a way to fuck something up and I end up with 10 grams per canopy. Life is suffering with ATWs.
Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 72d
Oh yah, all it takes is a plastic tub with a latching lid and a fine mist spritzer! The first time I did super poorly but had pins in a couple weeks, and got a couple flushes (which I harvested way too late.)
Another try and the first flush was WAY more thicc, got about seven flushes over the course of two or three months before I stopped them. Just threw em in a room with no special light or anything, just spritzed twice a day or so. Barely touched them or did anything, just went in to wet em a little and admire them occasionally. They were extremely self-sufficient!
Took ages to dry, but once completely dried out, easily 120+g total from the second batch!
INeedANewUserName@piefed.social · 2 pts · 71d
If you order a spawn block of shiitake or oyster they are pretty easy indoors in my experience. Outdoor shiitake making my first attempt wont likely know until fall of 2027
Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 71d
Outdoors takes that long?! Wild! Teachers were flushin’ in like a month or two. Good luck on your outdoor grow! :3
INeedANewUserName@piefed.social · 2 pts · 71d
I used dowel plugs instead of sawdust as first attempt so a bit slower but easier to avoid contamination from what I read. Also depends on the size of the logs, weather conditions, how heavily you inoculate, etc. Have a winter season here where the shiitakes are likely to go dormant. Might see something earlier than that but if I don't see anything by winter 2027 will assume it has likely failed. If it goes well should have a number of years of production though.
kerrigan778@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 21 pts · 73d
They aren't gonna suck themselves.
SethTaylor@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 72d
Well... I don't know about the rest of you guys but I've just uncovered a new fantasy
wizzor@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 72d
I think I need more details on this one.
sundray@lemmus.org · 1 pts · 72d
😵💫 🫠
qevlarr@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 72d
Mushroom farming management: keep them in the dark and feed them shit
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 11 pts · 72d
uhm ... u wanna run for president next?
greedytacothief@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 72d
I think you grow king trumpet on sawdust, agaricus species are the dung loving one's
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 18 pts · 72d
Do NOT fondle the wall of dongs.
... at least not without first asking the fungal gestalt consciousness for consent first.
Ok, also, someone needs to overlay this with the green screened, joe pesci 'what the fuck is this piece of shit?' shot/reverese shot thing.
This, but not shit tier quality:
you'd need a second background image but yeah
... maybe use a shot of the infinite hallway of literal 'backdoors' from the 2nd/3rd matrix movies, i think that would work, just color grade it a bit.
ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org · 2 pts · 72d
Oglaf: Escape Room (NSFW)
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · -1 pts · 72d
"gestalt". when you want to sound exotic even though you could have just said "shape" or "form"
edit: "system" or "organism" or "entity" could have worked as well
iuseasahibtw@ani.social · 14 pts · 72d
TheRagingGeek@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 72d
Ah yes the phallus palace
Ladokaka@piefed.social · 13 pts · 73d
penisfactory
socsa@piefed.social · 13 pts · 72d
This picture is still less gay than the Trump football AI post.
petersr@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 72d
S P O R E
In the air
Jankatarch@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 72d
I still don't exactly understand what the fuck mushrooms are.
sundray@lemmus.org · 33 pts · 72d
Relevant XKCD:
meekah@discuss.tchncs.de · 17 pts · 72d
Understandable, they're neither animals nor plants, and at least to me, that's really weird. Pretty much everything large enough to see fits into those categories, and it just feels like fungi should be plants as well.
I just googled a bit about this topic and learned algae is also not a plant. But it's green!
Doom@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 72d
You should check out kelp next. It's not a plant either.
boonhet@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 72d
Isn't that a type of algae?
Obi@sopuli.xyz · 3 pts · 72d
I guess you also count minerals as plants?
mapleseedfall@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 72d
Depends. Is it green?
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 72d
Copper is now a plant.
boonhet@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 72d
God dam ea-nasir and his oxidized copper
vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 72d
The ancient shamans of metal approve of this message.
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 72d
Swear to god, your name and avatar is apparently a sound i can hear.
Started playing in my head when I saw you pop up.
... ... I'm gonna blame the mushrooms.
vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 72d
Honestly I would've thought the track Metal Monks (BoS theme) would fit better what with my profile picture being Pelinal Whitestrake a literal crusader and cyborg a metal monk if you will.
meekah@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 72d
I was just considering living things here, but fair point
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 9 pts · 72d
mushrooms are just eucaryotic species that never bothered to develop legs or brains (and also no photosynthesis) . if they want to go somewhere, they either grow a thin wire to get there or throw a million spores into the air and hope that one lands where it should be going to.
marxismtomorrow@lemmy.today · 6 pts · 72d
Fun fact, it's very likely that without mushrooms land animals wouldn't exist. More controversially it's possible that without mushrooms no creatures with higher order thinking like human variants could exist.
eneff@discuss.tchncs.de · 4 pts · 72d
stoned ape theory mentioned
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 3 pts · 72d
(citation needed)
marxismtomorrow@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 72d
Sure thing, my undereducated comrade.
Fungi (or protofungi) were likely the first large multi-cellular life on land, predating plants by at least a half billion years and creating the soil conditions necessary for plants to make the jump from the ocean. In fact plant life without fungal symbiosis on land likely would have been impossible.
As to the second part, while it's controversial in some circles that lean heavily toward divine creation or intervention, the Stoned Ape Theory is nonetheless pretty well supported. As for my exact wording; I'm also including dolphins, which do recreational drugs anyway, and suggesting outside popular theories there's a sea fungus they've keyed in on in the past, as well as octopi who like to get high, even crows like a little chemical help now and again. While we don't have direct evidence of non-ape species being particularly into eating fungus for its mind altering effects, the fact that pretty much every 'intelligent' species seems to enjoy recreational mind-altering drugs does point to a common origin for intelligence itself.
boonhet@sopuli.xyz · 4 pts · 72d
That just makes you wanna give shrooms to animals to see if any develop higher intelligence
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 2 pts · 72d
xD but for the fungus to activate these parts of the brain that form language etc, these parts would have to be there in the first place. it doesn't make much sense to develop a brain and then depend on external substances to activate them. also it would be a huge disadvantage to not just always enable them, which nature surely could have done, and probably did.
chloroken@lemmy.ml · 2 pts · 72d
Motherfucker you got your answer. Stop arguing with scientists.
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 3 pts · 72d
i'm not sure whether you're serious. science is a process. it's meant to continuously question everything.
chloroken@lemmy.ml · -4 pts · 72d
Lmao yeah, science is a process. One that your inane ramblings have fuck all to do with.
You're a contrarian weirdo who asked for information, got it, then argued. Because it's ostensibly all you have to offer.
Edit: Oops I missed the instance, typical feddit horseshit.
plyth@feddit.org · 2 pts · 72d
Stop taking Science as a religion. Questioning theories is the foundation of science. If there is an answer, somebody will be happy to provide it. If there is none then we have to look more closely.
chloroken@lemmy.ml · 0 pts · 71d
plyth@feddit.org · 2 pts · 72d
Why?
ICastFist@programming.dev · 3 pts · 72d
The first step before we get 40k orks
KyuubiNoKitsune@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 72d
Does anyone?
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 13 pts · 73d
Wall-o-Dicks
TheLunatickle@lemmy.zip · 12 pts · 73d
Assuming this is real, that mofo needs a gas mask. There is no way breathing that many spores ends well.
ThePantser@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 73d
Glory Wall
JoShmoe@ani.social · 1 pts · 72d
We’ll make you a winner yet
Asfalttikyntaja@sopuli.xyz · 11 pts · 72d
I just hope they don’t start squirting.
Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca · 11 pts · 73d
Your mom in college.
kylie_kraft@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 73d
texture@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 72d
hmmm
altphoto@lemmy.today · 10 pts · 72d
The presidential micro penis wall, now at 40X zoom for all your viewing pleasures. The registry starts after WW3 during the dictatorship of the one pedo called orange. Today in 5673 we can only thank our ancestors for our very large penises. After only a few thousand T presidential specimens a new family took over such that today we have advanced cellphone technology! We have even developed "thecar"!
horn_e4_beaver@discuss.tchncs.de · 6 pts · 72d
I don't know how big your penis is, but these don't look micro to me.
Tikiporch@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 72d
They shrink you down so you can see them up close, like Fantastic Voyage.
village604@adultswim.fan · 2 pts · 72d
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 72d
It's all ... computer!
nullspace@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 72d
This is actually kind of interesting to me because I hadn't ever considered they would be grown vertically like that as opposed to racks stacked on top of each other.
DioramaOfShit@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 73d
Ok hear me out. The backrooms..... but with mushroom walls
Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 72d
The mush-rooms? WHEN
texture@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 72d
lock me up and throw away the key
gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 8 pts · 72d
this is gonna cause massive allergies
i hope it's at least somewhat ventilated otherwise i'd recommend immediately getting an adrenaline syringe or you won't be able to breathe for the next 3 weeks
Cordyceps@sopuli.xyz · 8 pts · 72d
This does not look like an amateur operation where something as essential as ventilation would be overlooked.
Jako302@feddit.org · 2 pts · 72d
These mushrooms aren't black mold or some other toxic variation. While its not really healthy to be in these rooms for too long, its not that different from a really dusty area like a sawmill.
Taleya@aussie.zone · 7 pts · 73d
Wall of wangs
nectar45@lemmy.zip · 7 pts · 72d
You arr going to the penis wall
Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 72d
Challenge: try walking to the end of that hallway without getting at least a demi-chub.
JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 72d
Is that like when Hercules gets a chub?
Yakfolk@anarchist.nexus · 7 pts · 73d
Sporkkake
Imperious_melange@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 73d
HeHoXa@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 73d
Debbie Does Malaysia
too_high_for_this@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 72d
dongs
Misty@lemy.lol · 5 pts · 72d
Maybe a lil sus... big old wall of di- perfectly delicious edible mushroom '-'
umbraroze@slrpnk.net · 5 pts · 72d
Ah I see. These mushrooms have [hbomberguy] extruded [/hbomberguy].
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 72d
hbomerguy breaking through the wall to scream about aquaman, but the wall is mushroom tips
zr0@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 4 pts · 72d
Please let them all release their spores.
houndeyes@toast.ooo · 4 pts · 71d
Dude look like he gon' pickafew then go into the Matrix.
NatakuNox@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 73d
Just what it's like for your college average springbreakers
EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com · 4 pts · 72d
In a row?
VerilyFemme@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 72d
How many would you choke on?
ICastFist@programming.dev · 7 pts · 72d
Yes
Resonosity@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 72d
Dick wall
janewaydidnothingwrong@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 72d
I dont know what kind of mushrooms those are but I know they can punch REALLY hard
TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 72d
It reminds me of the room where Abstract Daddy is in Silent Hill 2.
Obligatory: if you know, you know.
LillyPip@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 72d
Uhh…
finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 73d
Wonder what the Help Wanted ad copy would read?
pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 73d
Why so bright?
sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 72d
Hey, some appendages look good in harsh lighting.
HappyZed30@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 72d
Doomsday mushroom vault
CapuccinoCoretto@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 73d
Anyone ever see Hitoshi Matsumoto's Symbol? Fun film and this is the first thing I thought of when I saw the pic.
A man is trapped in a surreal room where the walls are covered in "buttons". Each one he presses make something appear.
The buttons are cherubim angels baby penises and scrotes.
noxypaws@pawb.social · 1 pts · 72d
Mmm stallions
M137@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 72d
Look at all those dickens! (source if you don't know: https://youtu.be/F-X4SLhorvw )
TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com · -4 pts · 73d
They look like magic mushrooms, I have been growing them a few times as well. Just not on this scale haha
M137@lemmy.today · -1 pts · 72d
They don't look like shrooms at all... like not even a little bit. You're either lying or grew some other kind of mushrooms that isn't psychoactive, because none that are look like that.
Pretty sure these are king oyster mushrooms.
TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 72d
They indeed look more like those. The grow kits I had looked similar, hense my comment.