“Worst” by whatever measure you like.
Don’t explain the joke, leave it to our imagination.
Be nice, no slurs or bad language.
“Worst” by whatever measure you like.
Don’t explain the joke, leave it to our imagination.
Be nice, no slurs or bad language.
112 Comments
Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world · 76 pts · 22h
We call it, The Aristocrats!
SnarkoPolo@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 22h
We have a winner.
the_fuckler@nord.pub · 3 pts · 17h
I miss him. The whole story of why he even went into that routine has been scrubbed from film but it's so legendary
ALoafOfBread@lemmy.ml · 42 pts · 22h
Better Nate than lever
Nomecks@lemmy.ca · 7 pts · 21h
Best joke ever if you can actualky tell it!
starman2112@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 15h
Still remember the time my dad called me demanding 40 minutes of his life back
ViatorOmnium@piefed.social · 28 pts · 22h
A stick.
girlnamedzero@piefed.zeromedia.vip · 3 pts · 17h
What’s long, brown, and sticky?
sem@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 17h
Grass ; i lied about the wheels
Nomecks@lemmy.ca · 1 pts · 21h
A pink slipper
Philote@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 21h
What’s brown and sticky?
volore@scribe.disroot.org · 19 pts · 21h
One baby nailed to ten trees.
Old_Jimmy_Twodicks@sh.itjust.works · 19 pts · 22h
The Pope looks up and says, "You fuckers are my kind of people."
Tujio@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 18h
Sits back, lights a cigarette and says "you know, you cunts are alright"
ceenote@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 22h
And the penguin says, "Nah, that's just ice cream."
Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 22h
To get to the other side
charokol@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 21h
You don’t understand. This was actually the first joke, so while it may not be funny to us, it was hilarious to the people who first heard it, and all other humor ultimately derived from this one joke
PrimeErective@startrek.website · 5 pts · 21h
Maybe it got hit by a car and the "other side" is the afterlife
kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 19h
I suspect that jokes are older than roads.
charokol@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 19h
I’m gonna need a source on that
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 10h
Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband’s lap.
zecg@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 21h
Rare considered response.
Yew@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 22h
Orange you glad
its_kim_love@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 13 pts · 21h
Because the light was on.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 10h
You know, I like the way you tell it better
ivanafterall@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 11h
The Aristocrats!
Jonnyprophet@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 8h
Yup. This is the one.
DrSleepless@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 15h
Eric Clapton wouldn’t let his bag of cocaine fall out a window.
gh0stb4tz@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 22h
“Grandma… so that’s how you died…”
charonn0@startrek.website · 8 pts · 22h
So the pharmacist says, "I've got just the thing to stop that coffin!"
otacon239@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 22h
You got any more of those meat flavored pickles?
PrimeErective@startrek.website · 2 pts · 21h
Got any grapes?
vrek@programming.dev · 6 pts · 19h
There was no punchline
sem@piefed.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 17h
After he waited so long all those other times!!!? Outrageous
vrek@programming.dev · 3 pts · 17h
At least he didn't have to listen to what a whale sounds like
Pronell@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 17h
You're a real mean drunk, Superman.
wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 21h
punches you in the face
...you asked for a punchline, don't be mad at me
sik0fewl@piefed.ca · 5 pts · 18h
Wrecked him? Damn near killed him!
yesman@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 21h
It's not a bacon tree, it's a ham bush.
crystalmathadept@lemmy.zip · 5 pts · 19h
So I thought to myself, is that how she died?
tinyvoltron@discuss.online · 5 pts · 15h
It's the cobblestones.
kaidenshi@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 15h
Nah, that’s just ice cream.
BoosBeau@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 3h
What, did you blow a seal?
Rocketpoweredgorilla@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 22h
"He stands on a leaf and waits until Autumn." (Punchline to a joke I read in grade 3 from the 70's.)
Nibodhika@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 21h
Is an elephant involved? I think I know this one but had completely forgotten about it until I read this.
Rocketpoweredgorilla@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 19h
::: spoiler Yup. The joke spoiler.. How does an elephant get down from a tree? :::
It's such an incredibly lame joke that it's still burned into my brain nearly 5 decades later.
lemmyng@piefed.ca · 5 pts · 21h
Because Nyquil stops the coffin'.
tuckerm@feddit.online · 4 pts · 20h
Heard this one as a "spooky ghost story" around the campfire at a summer camp when I was 11 and it was the funniest thing I had ever heard.
RodgeGrabTheCat@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 21h
I got bad news, you are out of paint and that's not a porch, it's a Mercedes.
GreenKnight23@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 14h
one hatched and already stole a bike.
venusaur@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 22h
I have to walk out of here alone
Philote@lemmy.ml · 4 pts · 20h
Worst? They both come/cum on little white crackers. Wurst! I asked him to send me a link.
essell@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 22h
None
hellothere@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 19h
"Fuck you, Clown."
sik0fewl@piefed.ca · 1 pts · 18h
Then you must be a horse’s ass!
lost_faith@lemmy.ca · 4 pts · 22h
You take your foot off its head
Smeagol666@crazypeople.online · 4 pts · 14h
He sh*t in my pants too!
SMillerNL@piefed.social · 4 pts · 22h
Isn’t it disgusting?
Nemo@slrpnk.net · 3 pts · 19h
"Guys... I think made a mistake."
WizardofFrobozz@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 5h
“Guys, I think I fucked up.”
Nemo@slrpnk.net · 1 pts · 4h
I was trying to comply with OP's request per language.
DagwoodIII@piefed.social · 3 pts · 20h
"I thought he was your uncle."
RodgeGrabTheCat@lemmy.ca · 3 pts · 21h
Stupid, use them on the other side!
neonblacktaco@fedinsfw.app · 3 pts · 12h
An Impasta
spittingimage@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 20h
"Don't worry, I got him with my door."
maxthemummer@lemmus.org · 3 pts · 13h
What are you crying about, I gotta walk out of here alone?
toiletobserver@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 22h
That guy over there is picking watermelons.
blackbrook@mander.xyz · 3 pts · 17h
You poor dear! Don't you have a vase?
LaLuzDelSol@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 15h
That's a good one (lemmy didnt like it when it got posted though haha)
CapuccinoCoretto@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 22h
No deer. Ass too high, run too fast.
yermaw@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 9h
And thats why cornflakes are better than cheerios.
Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 20h
There's way too many good jokes in here!
OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 11h
A STIIIIIICK!
Treczoks@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 9h
Let Epsilon be so small that Epsilon/2 is already negative.
CadMunt@aussie.zone · 2 pts · 4h
Just the two of us.
lemmy_outta_here@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 4h
Cancer!
Astronut@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 22h
notSys@lemmy.cafe · 2 pts · 9h
Doing something after long time is better than doing nothing.
https://natethesnake.com/
moondoggie@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 4h
I thought I was reading a Norm McDonald joke there
moonshine69@lemmy.nz · 1 pts · 7h
Better Nate than lever?
Is this an llm bugging out by rephrasing?
notSys@lemmy.cafe · 2 pts · 7h
This joke is older than LLMs
moonshine69@lemmy.nz · 1 pts · 2h
Are you the llm though...this is a mangled rephrasing of the punchline.. was your prompt something like rephrase a common from a similar thread
notSys@lemmy.cafe · 1 pts · 1h
I'm not the LLM
paranoid@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 13h
Fuck you, clown!
SkaraBrae@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 18h
A police horse!
sem@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 17h
JPC?
Maven@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 19h
Personally, I have no iDeer.
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 2 pts · 15h
The dog says, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."
mojofrododojo@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 12h
"Dopey fucked a penguin Dopey fucked a penguin!"
ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de · 2 pts · 14h
Awwww My tractor broke down.
HamsterRage@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 8h
Because they have big fingers too.
Heikki2@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 5h
Rectum
frankenswine@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 17h
no idea! i have a hard time counting when i'm masturbating
Etterra@discuss.online · 1 pts · 5h
Kooshhh!
Big_Boss_77@fedinsfw.app · 1 pts · 20h
You'd think the second guy would've ducked.
IamBlank@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 4h
The “United” States
jxk@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 9h
Shut up and swim
Jonnyprophet@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 8h
Im checking for squirrels!
alternategait@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 19h
It wasn’t born yesterday.
Espitemophiliac@piefed.ca · 1 pts · 16h
Po-ta-to.
sem@piefed.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 17h
🎵 it's such a long way, to tip a Rary! 🎶
Flames5123@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 9h
I’m looking for the man that shot my paw.
Or the punchline may actually be, “oh it was a dog!”
craigers@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 10m
Parkinsons
Widdershins@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21h
"Some f*cking cab driver in New York."
jtrek@startrek.website · 1 pts · 18h
"oh, don't worry, it was dead before I started"
Zozano@aussie.zone · 1 pts · 3h
I feel like I need to qualify that I understand this is where I write the punchline to a joke, and that I am not accientally typing this into a search engine.
::: spoiler spoiler Sexy kids :::
agent_nycto@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 1h
Ta-Daaaaaaa!
kurmudgeon@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 18h
"You believe that shit?"
datavoid@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 18h
Stop laughing and reload
Wren@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 20h
All the sheep are in the truck and one of them is honking the horn.
ouRKaoS@lemmy.today · 1 pts · 5h
DIE, HERETIC!
numenorb@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 57m
I like that joke!
CombatWombat@feddit.online · 1 pts · 10h
I’ll take a slice of apple, then.