Future Problems [Ryan Rds.]

Source: https://rdstonowhere.tumblr.com/post/823475705704857600/future-problems

1.1k points · 132 comments · view on lemmy.world

132 Comments

actionjbone@sh.itjust.works · 251 pts · 21d (54 replies)

Tomato is a fruit.

MutantTailThing@lemmy.world · 124 pts · 21d (23 replies)

Intelligence is knowing tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put tomato in a fruit salad.

call_me_xale@lemmy.zip · 95 pts · 21d (9 replies)

Charisma is selling a fruit salad with tomatoes as "salsa"

shutz@lemmy.ca · 38 pts · 21d (4 replies)

Constitution is eating some after the opened container has been sitting in the fridge for over a month.

CombatWombat@feddit.online · 27 pts · 21d (2 replies)

Dexterity is dodging when someone throws a tomato at you for telling an unfunny joke at open mic night (and also successfully weaving your tomato plant into a cage or trellis).

idiomaddict@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Strength is throwing a rotten tomato hard enough to explode on impact.

Zarobi@aussie.zone · 6 pts · 21d

Rule of cool is being able to hit the moon with a tomato on a natural 20

actionjbone@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 21d

Or is that low Wisdom?

Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 21d (1 reply)

You ever had peach salsa my dude? Or Chutney? The sky's the limit.

call_me_xale@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 21d

Mango salsa gets my vote

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Dude some of us like salsa

call_me_xale@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 20d

I never meant to imply there was!

cannedtuna@lemmy.world · 17 pts · 21d (5 replies)

Intelligence is knowing Pineapple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing it belongs on pizza.

SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world · 10 pts · 21d (4 replies)

Your pizza.

Not my pizza.

Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Found the guy not living in a communist country.

SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world · 6 pts · 21d

Could you imagine having to share our pizza with everyone in the country when you get one?

No wonder communists always look so miserable.

StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Amchovies

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21d

Well those actually belong on pizza

tal@lemmy.today · 8 pts · 21d

Tomatoes do have a wide variety of cultivars, some of which have considerably-higher sugar content.

searches

https://growingfruit.org/t/what-are-the-sweetest-tomatoes-highest-brix-lowest-acid-possible/69110

Many cherry tomatoes can brix between 12 and 16.

https://static1.squarespace.com/static/64b974963cb8f079e9f7c83f/t/652f1cf07f8b2f125c06fd7b/1697586417068/BrixRefractiveIndNologo.jpg

Leviathan@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 21d

If you've had fresh tomatoes that ripened on the plant you KNOW they can swing both ways.

0ops@piefed.zip · 6 pts · 21d

You say that like I wouldn't eat the fuck out of a fruit salad with good tomatoes

dalekcaan@feddit.nl · 4 pts · 21d (3 replies)

Intelligence is knowing that tomatoes are fruit in the botanical sense, which has no bearing on how they are used in the kitchen and ignores the fact that "vegetable," for instance, doesn't mean anything botanically and so maybe we shouldn't be using botanical terms in the kitchen and going "akshually, tomatoes are a fruit" doesn't make you sound smart, it just makes you sound like a smarmy pedant.

Signtist@bookwyr.me · 3 pts · 21d

I'd normally agree with you, but I imagine in a hypothetical world where food can be 3d printed and one of the filament types was fruit, it'd be pretty important to know whether or not tomato is a fruit if you're planning on making a pizza.

MutantTailThing@lemmy.world · -1 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Ok grok

dalekcaan@feddit.nl · 4 pts · 21d

Excuse me? What the fuck does Musk's nazibot have to do with what I said?

turbowafflz@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 21d (12 replies)

so is wheat

otter@lemmy.ca · 29 pts · 21d

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fruit

In common language and culinary usage, fruit normally means the seed-associated fleshy structures (or produce) of plants that are typically sweet (or sour) and edible in the raw state, such as apples, bananas, grapes, lemons, oranges, and strawberries. In botanical usage, the term fruit includes many structures that are not commonly called as such in everyday language, such as nuts, bean pods, corn kernels, tomatoes, and wheat grains.

These are strange times for Fruit club. Strange times...

zewm@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 21d (9 replies)

I thought wheat was a grain?

ray@sh.itjust.works · 16 pts · 21d (2 replies)

Grains are fruits

turbowafflz@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 21d (1 reply)

All seeds are fruits, right?

agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 21d

Fruits contain seeds

otter@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 21d (4 replies)

Apparently it is both

Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 21d (3 replies)

AN OTTER???? HERE???? AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

pets the cute mod

otter@lemmy.ca · 11 pts · 21d (2 replies)

๐Ÿ™‚โ€โ†•๏ธ

I looked for a photo of a sea otter with fruit, but all I got was AI slop. So here is one enjoying some crunchy

CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 20d (1 reply)

If you are using google type before:2020, after your search query, to remove ai. Idk about other search engines.

otter@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 20d

What a scrungy otter ๐Ÿ˜„

Thank you for the tip, I'll try to remember that one

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21d

Wheat seeds are apparently called wheat berrys.

marcos@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 21d

We don't usually eat the wheat's fruit. Instead we use expensive machines to get every last of it away from the grain.

GraniteM@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 21d (7 replies)

The joke would have worked just fine had it said "Refill Octopus Cartridge" or literally any of a thousand other food options.

nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz · 5 pts · 21d

Going for the ink pun, I see you

agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 21d (5 replies)

Food is mostly made of sugar, complex carbs, fat, and protein. You could probably make a pretty decent printer with a dozen cartridges, and fructose would be a reasonable choice for one of them. The pizza isn't going to taste right without fructose in the tomato sauce.

Yeah it's a joke but I'm getting into multi-material printing and printed food is actually a super interesting application.

pivot_root@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Umami cartridge low.

"What the fuck is an umami?"

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21d

I look at it all as bullshit.

But really to me it's how your body responds to something with saliva.

Something salty you salivate, sour you salivate, umami you salivate but how quickly, how much, and how long vary based upon the sensation.

Umami basically means you salivate slowly for a long time which helps your stomach get ready to break down proteins apparently.

terranoid@lemmy.cafe · 5 pts · 21d (2 replies)

"here is your pizza shaped protein mush"

agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 21d (1 reply)

You ever seen 3d prints from 20 years ago? They were low res goopy slop. Now we're months away from off-the-shelf 8-toolhead printers. My newest printer uses dithering to blend 4 colors into nearly any color I could want. That tech can be used to blend flavors and textures rather than colors.

It's a fascinating technology, with an active development base. I see no reason why the relatively near future won't have actual 3d printed pizzas. With the right bed and nozzle heating, you can even get a nice crispy texture.

borkborkbork@piefed.social · 2 pts · 21d

imagine resin printing, but with flavours.

oh my microplastics fuck it tastes too good

Taldan@lemmy.world · 10 pts · 21d

Scientifically, yes. Culinarily, no

Gork@sopuli.xyz · 6 pts · 21d (2 replies)

Pizza is a vegetable

mirshafie@europe.pub · 8 pts · 21d (1 reply)

I had a feeling this is a USA thing, and lo and behold - congress says pizza and french fries count as vegetables.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 21d

Fry vegetable the fries vegetables in ~~~~vegetable~~~~ fry oil

tal@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 21d (2 replies)

Botanically, yes. Not in common usage, though. Someone also tried pulling that regarding tariffs in the US and the US legal system said "nice try, but no".

searches

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nix_v._Hedden

Nix v. Hedden, 149 U.S. 304 (1893), is a decision by the Supreme Court of the United States in which the Court unanimously held that tomatoes should be classified as vegetables rather than fruits for purposes of tariffs, imports and customs. Justice Horace Gray delivered the opinion of the Court in holding that the Tariff Act of 1883 used the ordinary meaning of the words "fruit" and "vegetable", instead of the technical botanical meaning.[1]

trem@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 4 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Yeah, "vegetables" are not a thing as far as botany is concerned. It is a purely culinary category.

The distinction between botanical and culinary definitions often causes confusion. Botanically, a fruit is defined by its origin as a mature ovary containing seeds, based on anatomical structure and developmental biology.

In contrast, culinary definitions are based on flavor, texture, and how a plant part is typically used in meals. Sweet or tart plant products are generally considered culinary fruits, while savory plant parts are classified as culinary vegetables. This explains why many botanical fruits are commonly treated as culinary vegetables. Tomatoes, for example, are botanical fruits because they develop from a flowerโ€™s ovary and contain seeds, but their savory flavor leads them to be used as a vegetable in cooking. Cucumbers, peppers, squash, and eggplants are other botanical fruits frequently used as culinary vegetables.

https://biologyinsights.com/the-botanical-classification-of-fruits/

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 21d

Culinary classifications make no sense to me. Cucumbers are melons that don't have as thick of an outside. They grow the same, flavour can end up the same, flesh can be the same.

Eat them room temp, cold whatever.

ParlimentOfDoom@piefed.zip · 2 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Eggplant is a berry

JasonDJ@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 21d

Strawberries are nuts.

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 71 pts · 21d (28 replies)

For a pizza?!

Uh, yeah? Tomato is a fruit.

Leviathan@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 21d (13 replies)

This is why pineapple haters have always been a mystery to me, replace one sweet, acidic fruit with another sweet, acidic fruit? Yeah, why not?

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 18 pts · 21d (3 replies)

It would be weird if they replaced the tomato for pineapple. That would be one extremely sweet and tart sauce. I'd still try it, but I don't have high hopes.

ouRKaoS@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Can you even sauce a pineapple like you can a tomato? Is pineapple sauce a thing?

driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br · 5 pts · 21d

You can make a jam and used it like that.

JasonDJ@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 21d

I think you are missing the prime opportunity for such a thing -- Sweet and Sour Chicken Pizza.

naught101@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 21d (1 reply)

One of my friends regularly puts banana on pizza

JasonDJ@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 21d

Skeeter, is that you?

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 21d

I already have a sweet acidic fruit. Also the short cook of the pizza oven doesn't process the fiber enough for my precious precious tummy. I need the long cook of the, I don't know, throwing the pineapple into the campfire.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Because one is umami heavy and mildly sweet and acidic and the other is heavily sweet and acidic with little if any umami

Leviathan@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 20d

Thing is, you're not really replacing one for the other, you're usually cooking them together, changing that sweet/acidic/umami balance in the overall pie and creating fresh new opportunities for flavors. Yes, I am being a tiny bit obtuse, but I think it's a good point.

FishFace@piefed.social · -3 pts · 21d (3 replies)

Uh, because it'd be horrible in many contexts? Replace the tomato in a marinara sauce on meatballs? Ew. Replace them in my tomato and rocket salad? Ew. Etc.

Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 3 pts · 21d (2 replies)

Would it be ew? Or are we just conditioned to think it is awful while it may actually be one of the best things to exist? You can't know for certain unless you try.

I'd try a meatballs in pineapple sauce.

FishFace@piefed.social · -1 pts · 21d (1 reply)

I love pineapple. I don't like pineapple in savoury dishes. I grew up getting a slice of grilled pineapple with ham and always that it was weird as hell. After getting one too many Asian dishes with pineapple in, I know to look out for them and not order them.

I think I'm pretty good at imagining what flavour combinations will taste like.

Did two sad gits really downvote me for not liking pineapple in savoury food? Yikes.

dubyakay@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 21d

You sound like a culinary ananas hater.

KernelTale@programming.dev · 3 pts · 21d (7 replies)

We do have arguments about tomatoes being a vegetable.

Kolanaki@pawb.social · 12 pts · 21d (6 replies)

Almost all fruits are vegetables.

A fruit is a specific part of a plant (of which the tomato is that part).

A vegetable is any edible part of a plant.

Doomsider@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 21d (1 reply)

I love this debate and I think you hit the nail on the head with your last two statements.

A vegetable is a culinary term not a scientific one. Fruit is both a scientific term meaning the ripened ovary (calm down people) of a flowering plant that holds seeds and a culinary term as plant parts that are sweet.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 21d

Fruit is also a culinary term meaning sweet or sour fruit

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21d

Which fruit aren't vegetables?

FishFace@piefed.social · 0 pts · 21d (2 replies)

Not in normal usage. Most people are not botanists.

Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 21d (1 reply)

You don't need to be a botanist to use the correct definition.

FishFace@piefed.social · 1 pts · 21d

Go on, convince me that it is "correct".

FishFace@piefed.social · 2 pts · 21d (3 replies)

You presuppose that the printer uses the botanical definition of fruit, which we can infer from the character's reaction it does not, or should not

weps@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 21d (2 replies)

The character may not know that tomato is a fruit.

His reaction may be genuine, but wrong

FishFace@piefed.social · 1 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Well, I thought that and then added "or should not", because a food printer should use language understandable to its users. If I order something "with berries" - whether at a restaurant or from a futuristic food printer - and get fucking avocado on it, I'm losing my shit.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21d

What, you don't like it when you order a berry sauce and get guacamole with tomatoes? What do you put in your yogurt then?

MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Looks like a vegetable, eaten like a vegetable, is a vegetable.

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 21d

How does it look like a vegetable? Looks wise it's closest to maybe an apple.

Now run off and tell everyone that strawberrys aren't berrys, because the seeds arent on the inside.

chefdano3@lemmy.zip · 44 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Tomatoes man. You need the fruit cartridge for the sauce.

Galapagon@sh.itjust.works · 10 pts · 21d

I'm glad somebody understands technology!

baltakatei@sopuli.xyz · 33 pts · 21d (1 reply)

It uses lemons for invisible ink used to embed its own serial code in case you try illegally printing truffles or something.

surewhynotlem@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 21d

Which is absolutely delicious. A little lemon goes a long way. It'll elevate your home cooking more than you think.

FuglyDuck@lemmy.world · 32 pts · 21d (2 replies)

Need the fruit cartridge for the tomatoes

ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 21d

No, it's used for leaving the ID of the printer, just in case you will use it to print cheese pizza or cheese salsa aubergine macaroni.

ammonium@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 21d

And the chili's

cannedtuna@lemmy.world · 27 pts · 21d

Well duh, the printer was out of Pineapple

Vincent@feddit.nl · 18 pts · 21d (2 replies)

"How can that be empty? I never even use it!"

marcos@lemmy.world · 13 pts · 21d (1 reply)

You must eat fruit at least every two weeks, or else the slime will solidify and damage the cartridge empty sensor.

LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21d

Maybe they dehydrate and grind everything to powder, then put them in cartridges that dispense to rehydrate them during the print process.

I haven't tried it with many foods, but you can very much get the flavor doing such. Texture is usually the issue but 3d printing must already be compensating for texture somehow

ActualGrapesTasteGreen@piefed.zip · 14 pts · 21d (4 replies)

Color printers probably did this to hide that they were fingerprinting your pages.

pivot_root@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 21d

Empty yllow, sure.

Cyan and magenta are just them getting greedy.

driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br · 2 pts · 21d (2 replies)

How do people find up that printers do that?

Baggie@lemmy.zip · 4 pts · 21d

Wikipedia says Dutch police who tracked down counterfeit money, which became public knowledge. It's crazy stuff.

DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 21d

Originally? Meaning decades ago when they first started doing this, it was probably discovered through a patent search.

wieson@feddit.org · 12 pts · 21d (3 replies)

Tomato, of course. But pepperoni is also a fruit.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 21d (1 reply)

The pepper in it is for sure

wieson@feddit.org · 2 pts · 21d

Do you mean the pepper_oni_? ;) That's what gives the pepperoni salami its name

Squirrelanna@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 21d

Don't go spreading pepperoni secrets.

LordPassionFruit@lemmy.ca · 11 pts · 21d

You wouldn't download a pizza

BobbyNevada@discuss.tchncs.de · 9 pts · 21d

Even if he finds it, that print is going to fail half way through. He is going to be eating half a pizza and half pizza flavored spaghetti.

perishthethought@piefed.social · 7 pts · 21d

... If HP made 3D printers ...

Oh wait, they do.

Danarchy@lemmy.nz · 7 pts · 21d (1 reply)

Fruiten beepin saucin loadin

PrimeErective@startrek.website · 5 pts · 21d

Uno dos tres cuatro cinco cinco seis

lightnsfw@reddthat.com · 7 pts · 21d

Lol, it's that being mad at the printer for being low on magenta joke but they replaced the printer with a hypothetical food 3d printer! The premise doesn't even make sense because tomatoes are fruits. Hahahaha

BigBoyShuanzee@aussie.zone · 6 pts · 21d

As someone who has hating doing IT support for printers for the last 18 years.. This hurts me a little bit mentally.

I'm sure there's some other comic in the same aspect that involves Microsoft Excel that I have hated since 2003... (When I was doing a year 9 highschool assignment)

NeatNit@discuss.tchncs.de · 5 pts · 21d

You'd think it's a first world problem, but as people grew to rely on it, conventional food shops and restaurants dwindled, and now for many people this is their only reliable food source. Well, "reliable". Smh.

gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org · 4 pts · 21d

you wouldn't download a pepperoni pizza

cosmos8188@leminal.space · 4 pts · 21d

Is that for the secret CIA code?

Treczoks@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 20d (2 replies)

I didn't know HP made 3D printers.

boonhet@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 20d (1 reply)

Neither did I, but unfortunately they do

Treczoks@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 20d

So satire was probably caught again by reality...

lama@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 21d
Cum_Rag@fedinsfw.app · 3 pts · 21d

why make your own food when corporations can sell you something to make food for you. im here putting oatmeal and milk into a mug to save money and eat healthier, like a neanderthal

notsure@fedia.io · 2 pts · 21d

...this hurts in so many ways

this@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 21d

That's whatcha get for buying a bamboo printer.

MasutaHarada@thelemmy.club · 1 pts · 21d (2 replies)

I wonder from which fruit they make the cheese, or it is separate cartridge aside of meat and flour?

MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 21d

Just powdered milk with oil and corn stark. What, you want a cartridge-swappin?

Goodlucksil@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 21d

You mean there is no dairy cartridge?

DisasterTransport@startrek.website · 1 pts · 20d (1 reply)

If you think about it any food that is extruded could be 3d printed

Where's my 3d pasta printer. Where's my bronze nozzle.

Johnmannesca@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 20d

Mmmm dodecahedron ravioli, just like brother used to make!

Klear@piefed.world · 1 pts · 21d
aeronmelon@lemmy.world · -3 pts · 21d (4 replies)

See? Pineapple pizza is evil.

fonix232@fedia.io · 6 pts · 21d (3 replies)

Tomatoes are fruit tho. Peppers too, and thus so is paprika, technically.

trem@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 21d (2 replies)

According to botanical definitions, yes, because botany does not know the category of a "vegetable". Culinarily, though, these are most definitely vegetables.

Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de · 1 pts · 21d (1 reply)

So what is the culinary definition of vegetable?

Because "these ones but not these ones" is a bad definition.

trem@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 21d

Sorry, I didn't want the myth to persist, but also not to spam the definition multiple times in this thread. I guess, I could've just linked to my other comment, though: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/21547211

Side-note: It's of course quite a colloquial term, so you might find different definitions, too. You can probably look up the definition of your country's farming ministry or such, though, for kind of the most official definition.