Sorry for how trite and predictable this is, but even though I was pretty cynical half my life ago, I couldn't have imagined so vile and corrupt a personage occupying the White House as what is there now, nor how easily and with how much cooperation they've been able to destroy the Constitution and government that was based on it.
That everything I learned about computers from assembly language in the 80s to tinkering with all the operating systems in the world would be thrown in the trash by a bunch of moronic managers who decided that ChatGPT was better than learning and being curious.
And as a result, that I would be disgusted by what is happening with programmers, and that I would find another job that does not involve any technology whatsoever. I loved that shit, I hate what it has become.
My boyfriend cares about me. Like, deeply. Like he will go out of his way to do things to support me. I was raised being told over and over that men are selfish and generally more concerned for themselves than their wives. That I need to be prepared to shoulder more of the burden. This is weird. He’s super nice. I can’t get over it.
I see this depiction of men all the time, and it just baffles me.
At the end of the day, most men are so happy when they are able to provide, protect, and support their wives / families / friends. Doing so is how most men measure their success in life. As Eddie Murphy said, all we really ask in return is the big piece of chicken.
because it's a projection. the women who complain about men being like that... are mostly talking about themselves.
i've dated many women who thought that way... and they are talking about themselves. they see the world through an adversarial lens and everything is about them having power over others and being terrified of anyone having power over them.
and if you explain to them you don't want any power over them they simple don't believe you. they think it's a lie or a manipulation tactic.... because that's how they treat everyone, through lies and manipulation. and no matter how honest you are with them... doesn't matter because they don't believe honesty exists.
parents project their shit onto their kids, it sucks.
a lot of unhappy people, refuse to let anyone around them ever be happy. you're allowed to be happy. don't let other folks unhappiness ruin yours, because they will try very hard to ruin it for you.
My wife is like that for a lot of valid reasons. If I may give you a useless piece of advice, enjoy it instead of fighting it because he may be serious about what he is doing.
What really made it hit was when I gave more thought to how much trash the human race has created, even in 20 years, let alone since the wave of products in the 50s.
Like, I think it can just end any time. We had a good run.
The two things I think would be most surprising to 25 year old me would be that I still skateboard regularly, and how happy I am being single, as they'd just gotten married and been told they're too old to be skating.
I sorta knew that trans people existed, but didn't know of hormone replacement (in the '00s Hungarian tabloids only spoke of surgeries when they mentioned trans people 🙄), and since I couldn't have passed without that, it never crossed my mind that me being trans was an option.
IDK. I think the half part is what gets me on this. I'm a similar age to you. But my 19 year old self was definitely a repper. My 12 or 13 year old self would be shocked. My 19 year old self would be understanding but horrified. They can both pound sand. I would have a lot of fun tormenting my 19 year old self. Would torment him with lurid descriptions of how I've had srs, am married to a cis het guy, and all that that implies. 🤣🤣🤣
I know many trans people know their gender identity from an early age, and have strong convictions despite society's pressure, but being agender, I had no strong convictions about my gender, it wasn't even there. And I always tried to be practical, and so the only option that seemed available was to just try to put up with my born sex and assigned gender no matter how unhappy they made me 🫠
I am surprised that I made it out of my 20s and 30s alive. I also didn't expect to have a job that aligns with my ethics. I am a caregiver for high functioning adults with special needs and pretty good at it.
Oh god. I was warned people are generally dicks, and believed it, but my goodness I though it was like, out of carelessness or something. Not that people are just fundamentally disinterested in more than the appearance of morality.
Yea. I still seriously believe that over half of people are "fundamentally" "good" and that they just make mistakes etc.
And I definitely knew about how bad people could be due to access to good history books and parents who told me about things like the Belgian Congo.
But my kid self would have been shocked at how common people being shit to each other is and the incredible scale of damage the most powerful are able to do to the world.
Yea. I still seriously believe that over half of people are “fundamentally” “good” and that they just make mistakes etc.
Just make sure you're applying the same standards to everyone. Without knowing what the scare quotes mean, there's nothing to argue with, but so so many people have blind spots. Which is part of the problem.
Personally I just meant them as being extremely hard to define in this context.
And my self assessment is that I treat everyone the same, giving them the benefit of the doubt, at least until they prove themselves to be malicious. I definitely have no qualms cutting people off who try to actively damage my life.
How much I've started to hate technology. It's like I had smart phones before my peers had flip phones. Same with computers; let me go to the computer graveyard room and put one together for myself. My family was very into tech so I had a computer since I was 5.
I think at this point I'm just not into it. Same with cars; I like my almost thirty year old cars.
You know, I never read it so I can't say. It looks like it would be a good read. Personally, I research the engines and transmissions as well as what advanced features cars have. I would rather have a car with a cool suspension and a limit slip differential like my Infiniti (Nissan) than all the electronic bells and whistles modern cars have. I used to have a Volvo, I crashed it twice because I was fighting against all of the "safety" features... I'm not sure why they would put in a system to brake one caliper, but then again this was when Ford bought the company. It was fun to momentum drift in the rain even though it was FWD.
I still cannot belive I am married to my wife. She is amazing. She can basically solve any problem. She is a great mom. She helps me talk through my problems, she helps me make decisions, she can hold up her end of a conversation, and she is beautiful. I've always been fascinated by women in their late 30's or 40's that were still beautiful, and now I have one living in my house.
I used to have a little comic I kept at my desk. There was a couple in it, the woman asks the man "where are yoy taking me?" To which he replied "for granted!"
I kept it there as a reminder to myself, to never take my wife for granted, to always work at improving myself and always let her know she is the center of my universe.
I had a dead-set career path (game design) and even went to college with this path in mind. When it all came together and I finally had the opportunity to do it, I made a sudden decision against it.
Ended up being the right choice, but I don't think my younger self would believe it.
Wow, I could write something similar. It was game dev for me. My younger self prepared for the college path. I didn't deviate. I didn't land a job in the industry and now do something similar, which isn't exactly games (VR training simulations). Best decision of my life.
Younger self might be disappointed I don't make cool games.
I studied video game art in uni, but left the course after 1.5 years bc it went in a different direction I hoped for (it went all-in on 3D, and the 2D I was actually interested in was done in a month). By that point I already had a part-time job as graphic designer, so I continued that instead, and eventually managed to land a graphic-designer-ish job at a non-profit organisation.
My current job is a lot less glamorous from the outside than video game art, or even a typical graphic design portfolio would be, but I really enjoy it :)
Some of the teachers said "go to college and get a job like ours", some said trades are a good idea. The one guy was like "you'll move through tens of careers and IT WILL BE GREAT!". But, at no point was flexibility encouraged. It was "find your calling and pursue it ruthlessly". I wasn't sure what to major in going out of high school, because lots of stuff is cool, and they thought that was the worst thing ever.
Mid-forties now. Mid-20s me would be surprised to know that yes, he does have major depression and doesn't have to just find a way to work around that. A lot of great things came after that, but many unnecessarily bad things in the interim. Now I'm just what I feel to be a normal amount of depressed! 😅
40 now. At 20 I was a know-it-all crusader against having kids and now my two children are the absolute center of my universe.
I can't even begin to explain the kind of joy these two kids create out of thin air. It's simply beyond my ability to describe how much I love them and how grateful that I am to have met a woman I loved so much that it seemed wrong to not want to bring more of her into the world.
I am so fucking overwhelmed that my life turned out the way it has that I suffer from hidden imposter syndrome because I just don't feel like I deserve to be this happy.
All I can do is try to be a worthy father and husband.
That I am as "successful" as I currently am. Measured by typical achievement of "The American Dream".
Why the fuck do I live on a cul-de-sac in some boring-ass suburban neighborhood with literally zero charm or culture. I should be living on the top floor of some mixed-use urban building with a subway or light rail station across the street.
Most importantly, younger me would be so disappointed in my Christmas lights. Where are all the Christmas lights? I have a house. I can afford plenty of Christmas lights. Why are my house and yard and trees and bushes not absolutely doused in Christmas lights. Like Clark W. Griswold levels...you see younger me, it turns out that having a house is already a lot of stupid, unnecessary work, and then putting up Christmas lights and taking them down is even more work and I'm tired.
But if we stand up against it, we'll be off'ed or thrown into prison. It's not our fault a bunch of despotic tyrranic dystopian oligarch fascists are burning the world down. You say it's our fault if we don't stop them?? How about it's THEIR fault for burning the world down?!
Well, who's us, and who's them, in that paragraph? Does a congressman count as them? What about a senator, or an ordinary local Republican? There isn't actually any distinction.
The truth is evil is banal, and like always in these parts of history, it's a movement through all stratums of society. The big ones would never have captured that government power without help from the little ones. Not everyone is onboard, so yes, it's probably not your fault, but it's not really just Trump's fault, either.
When I was 17 I was fresh out of high school and had no idea what I wanted to study or do. I'm 34 and have studied a myriad of shit by now but I guess what is most surprising is that I still don't know what I want to do.
So, second year of college. I would be surprised about my salary vs what that's worth in today's economy. I would have been ecstatic with this back then. Would have thought I was living the dream. Inflation is a bitch.
Also, I probably would be shocked at how cool retro handhelds are now. I just got a Retroid Pocket Nova, and it can play every console I've ever had (I stopped console gaming at the PS2). And, it can run some Windows games. At 19, I was rocking a Windows Mobile 6 PDA, with a 624 MHz processor.
Compared to my early 20s, living in rural Japan is probably the most surprising things. As well it should as now my plan is to GTFO to a country that believes more in workers' rights, allows getting citizenship while maintaining an old one (need my US citizenship until my parents pass and Japan has no visa to move them here unless they're basically homeless), etc.
I'm not sure 20 year old me would be very surprised. I ended up pretty much exactly where it would be expected of me: still single, living in a garage, working a dead end factory job. No possibility of ever owning a home and dwindling possibly for any kind of retirement.
early 50's. did well in school and got a lot of education. I knew I would not necessarily be rich but technically in a meritocracy I should have done pretty well. I should note I have done better than many of the peers both my wife and I know. Most who have done better did so by making good connections. I can't believe how poorly I have had to live and that my retirement is so unsure at this age. Heck I thought the increasing retirement age would reverse itself and advancement would allow for a much more utopian society. lol. also technological miracles beyond my wildest imaginations implemented in dystopian ways beyond my wildest fears.
I was a rolling stone - drifting and drinking aimlessly through my 20s, backpacking, boozing and picking up weird jobs and weird people as I wandered through Europe and south east Asia. Now I'm an IT manager and married with 2 kids, a mortgage and a dog.
26, to my 13 self would be wack. I came out at 17, married at 24, divorced at 25. Still the same kid looking for friends and a family. I would've believed my parents would be homophobic at 13 and they still are at 26. I dropped out of college, didn't marry my girlfriend. I'm a chef now, I studied hard to follow my dad into an IT career, that went no where fast.
My 13 yo self would think I'm a loser and an addict. He was very dumb and a 13 yo, lmao wtf do they know.
I’m 40, half a life ago I was 8 years pre-lung transplant. I’d be shocked that I did it at all, I was very anti-transplant for various reasons but having kids I love enter my life when I was 22 changed my mind, which would also be a shocker since I was also anti kids at 20, but I’d also be shocked it worked, one of the main reasons I was against it was I was sure if I got one I would suffer even more and die anyway. So I guess at the end of the day, I’d be mostly surprised I wasn’t dead.
all the shit i can afford that i never dreamed of even having.
curse of low expectations I guess.
But I'd be super depressed that I never found a partner or had a family. Half a lifetime ago i was dating someone I thought I'd marry and have a family with... then she turned out to hate me and children. And sadly ever I met since her also hated me and children... so better off being single than being with someone who hates me.
100%. Turns out you're always still going to be you. There's no magic line to cross. You're the same living, breathing entity experiencing the same linear stream of existence.
I'm 45 now. If you would have told me at half my age how angry and sad I am in general, I probably would've been very confused and broken hearted. I guess the time is important for the desensitization.
25 year old me would be surprised that I switched jobs a few times, got my bachelors degree and don't work as a plant operator anymore. He would be most surprised about which people are still a major part of my life, and which turned out to be not worth it.
When I was a depressed and extremely suicidal teenager, I decided that if nothing had improved for me by the time I was 20, then I'd kill myself then. When I set that time limit, I already had a couple of failed attempts under my belt (unbeknownst to my family), and desperately wanted to die. However, I felt guilty for the pain that would cause, which is why the attempts only happened when I reached a crisis point.
I had read suicide support guidance that advised to try and put distance between yourself and the suicidal feelings, because even just a day or two can help to stabilise the situation. Well my response was to take this logic and apply it to an extreme level, with significant spite attached. My logic was that if indeed things were just as hopeless when I was 20, I would feel justified in killing myself, and fuck anyone who would begrudge me my escape at that point. I didn't require things to be better-better by the time I was 20, I just needed something to change to show that it was still worth fighting.
Well, here I am, almost 10 years later, and I'm still alive. still struggle with suicidal ideation on a regular basis, and I suspect I will always have to keep an eye on my mental health. However, nowadays, when I get low, I don't actively want to die like I used to. Instead, it's usually a case of "I don't want to die, but I know I can't live like this".
Ironically, I think that planning my death saved my life. There were countless times over my late teens where I would've been at risk of making another attempt on my life, but instead would self soothe by counting down how much time I had left to ensure. It did mean that my early 20s were a bit confusing, as I was living a life that I had planned without ever expecting that I'd get that far. And I still sort of feel like these past 10 years have been a massive bonus level that I'm half expecting to be swept away from me at any moment, but I'm still here.
There are other things I could have replied to this question with, but nothing will trump my surprise at still being alive (and wanting to be)
At 17, I would have been ungodly shocked to know that those fainting episodes were part of something much much bigger. I'd be a little put off by how sedentary I become, but at least I'm still fighting the good fight.
I think I also would be fairly shocked to see myself as gay.
Young me would have a hell of an emotional rollercoaster to see current me for certain, lol
I have to say that I to am surprised at how sedentary I was. I get around but man I used to bike and walk so much. Used to be minimum of miles per day and now its miles per week.
This is interesting to think. I wouldn't be that surprised at my life. I did the stuff i wanted to, nothing crazy has happened really. I still do a lot of the same hobbies I did 20 years ago, just with more money. I would think emulation is fricken sweet as well as all the console mods that exist now.
I'd be massively depressed at the state of the world. Makes me wonder how much worse itll get in another 20 years.
Half a life time ago, I was 20 and the only thing different between then and now that really would surprise 20 year old me would be hearing I have ADHD, BPD, and am autistic since I wasn't diagnosed until my 30s.
The amount of weed I smoke. Teenage-me was still in the process of deprogramming from D.A.R.E. propaganda. She wouldn't have expected to become a full-blown stoner in her 30s.
I've always had a strong memory, and unfortunately it feeds into my anxiety and depression. Weed definitely impacts my memory, but it's a benefit - normally, all the stupid little things of the day would torture me. I'd be overanalyzing every word I said, worrying over social mistakes that nobody else even remembers happening. It's a mental process that only serves to hurt me, and that I raw-dogged sober for most of my life. Weed lets me break that cycle, change my focus, and not remember all the dumb little details that don't actually matter, but that would otherwise keep me awake at night.
As a teen, I would've struggled to understand that there could be benefits to marijuana. She would've just thought the self-torture was normal. Life's weird like that sometimes.
Early 40s, and I have 2 young kids, I was going to be child free right up until I met my wife 5 years ago and knew if I wanted her kids were in my future. I also really enjoy being a dad.
105 Comments
leadore@lemmy.world · 38 pts · 3d
Sorry for how trite and predictable this is, but even though I was pretty cynical half my life ago, I couldn't have imagined so vile and corrupt a personage occupying the White House as what is there now, nor how easily and with how much cooperation they've been able to destroy the Constitution and government that was based on it.
HubertManne@piefed.social · 6 pts · 3d
yeah felt like nixon was an anomaly and reagan and um man bush jr. seems pretty typical for these guys, but surely it could not get worse......
one_old_coder@piefed.social · 31 pts · 3d
That everything I learned about computers from assembly language in the 80s to tinkering with all the operating systems in the world would be thrown in the trash by a bunch of moronic managers who decided that ChatGPT was better than learning and being curious.
And as a result, that I would be disgusted by what is happening with programmers, and that I would find another job that does not involve any technology whatsoever. I loved that shit, I hate what it has become.
kazerniel@piefed.world · 1 pts · 3d
What job did you switch to?
one_old_coder@piefed.social · 7 pts · 3d
No job yet, I have a lot of ideas but it's difficult to change when you've been focused on computers for so long.
kazerniel@piefed.world · 7 pts · 3d
Wishing you success in your career change!
one_old_coder@piefed.social · 3 pts · 3d
Thanks!
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 1 pts · 2d
Did you expect to live to see robots replace a lot of stuff? It's hard to imagine you never thought about it, if that was your background.
disregardable@lemmy.zip · 29 pts · 3d
My boyfriend cares about me. Like, deeply. Like he will go out of his way to do things to support me. I was raised being told over and over that men are selfish and generally more concerned for themselves than their wives. That I need to be prepared to shoulder more of the burden. This is weird. He’s super nice. I can’t get over it.
Weirdfish@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 3d
I see this depiction of men all the time, and it just baffles me.
At the end of the day, most men are so happy when they are able to provide, protect, and support their wives / families / friends. Doing so is how most men measure their success in life. As Eddie Murphy said, all we really ask in return is the big piece of chicken.
AskewLord@piefed.social · 5 pts · 3d
because it's a projection. the women who complain about men being like that... are mostly talking about themselves.
i've dated many women who thought that way... and they are talking about themselves. they see the world through an adversarial lens and everything is about them having power over others and being terrified of anyone having power over them.
and if you explain to them you don't want any power over them they simple don't believe you. they think it's a lie or a manipulation tactic.... because that's how they treat everyone, through lies and manipulation. and no matter how honest you are with them... doesn't matter because they don't believe honesty exists.
AskewLord@piefed.social · 7 pts · 3d
parents project their shit onto their kids, it sucks.
a lot of unhappy people, refuse to let anyone around them ever be happy. you're allowed to be happy. don't let other folks unhappiness ruin yours, because they will try very hard to ruin it for you.
one_old_coder@piefed.social · 2 pts · 3d
My wife is like that for a lot of valid reasons. If I may give you a useless piece of advice, enjoy it instead of fighting it because he may be serious about what he is doing.
zewm@lemmy.world · 23 pts · 3d
I’m 44. The fact I’m still living. Nothing is wrong with me health wise. It’s just that past 40 is such a long time to live.
bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works · 3 pts · 3d
What really made it hit was when I gave more thought to how much trash the human race has created, even in 20 years, let alone since the wave of products in the 50s.
Like, I think it can just end any time. We had a good run.
Weirdfish@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 3d
The two things I think would be most surprising to 25 year old me would be that I still skateboard regularly, and how happy I am being single, as they'd just gotten married and been told they're too old to be skating.
neidu4@piefed.social · 10 pts · 3d
I've heard about this guy named Tony who still skates at the age of 58. He's pretty good at it too. I wonder if he ever considered a career in it.
bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 3d
Tony Crow? Yeah he's my neighbor. Great guy.
Weirdfish@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 3d
No, Tony Magnusson, but I'm pretty sure he retired
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2d
Ooh, skateboard grandpa. That's a vibe, I dig it.
(Yes, I know 50 isn't really a grandpa. Zaddy, maybe?)
Weirdfish@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2d
Had to look up Zaddy, will absolutely take it
kazerniel@piefed.world · 18 pts · 3d
The biggest surprise would definitely be that I'm trans, so I look completely different now than 19-years-old me might have imagined :D
VivianRixia@piefed.social · 9 pts · 3d
Same age. 19 year old me had never even heard of trans people, so it would definitely be a shock, but I'd like to think a welcome one.
kazerniel@piefed.world · 6 pts · 3d
I sorta knew that trans people existed, but didn't know of hormone replacement (in the '00s Hungarian tabloids only spoke of surgeries when they mentioned trans people 🙄), and since I couldn't have passed without that, it never crossed my mind that me being trans was an option.
WoodScientist@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 3d
IDK. I think the half part is what gets me on this. I'm a similar age to you. But my 19 year old self was definitely a repper. My 12 or 13 year old self would be shocked. My 19 year old self would be understanding but horrified. They can both pound sand. I would have a lot of fun tormenting my 19 year old self. Would torment him with lurid descriptions of how I've had srs, am married to a cis het guy, and all that that implies. 🤣🤣🤣
kazerniel@piefed.world · 2 pts · 3d
oh I had to look up "repper", I see now :)
I know many trans people know their gender identity from an early age, and have strong convictions despite society's pressure, but being agender, I had no strong convictions about my gender, it wasn't even there. And I always tried to be practical, and so the only option that seemed available was to just try to put up with my born sex and assigned gender no matter how unhappy they made me 🫠
Hermit_Lailoken@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 3d
I am surprised that I made it out of my 20s and 30s alive. I also didn't expect to have a job that aligns with my ethics. I am a caregiver for high functioning adults with special needs and pretty good at it.
neidu4@piefed.social · 13 pts · 3d
At 21 years old, I would never have thought I'd be living in [REDACTED] with 4 kids, a GF and awell paying job I actually like.
Alternatively, 21 year old me would probably have had his mind blown if I'd shown him all the places in the world I've had the pleasure of visiting.
victorz@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 3d
The level of evil that adults are capable of. My young self would never have imagined it. I used to think humans were nice to each other.
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 4 pts · 2d
Oh god. I was warned people are generally dicks, and believed it, but my goodness I though it was like, out of carelessness or something. Not that people are just fundamentally disinterested in more than the appearance of morality.
Thrawn@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 3d
Yea. I still seriously believe that over half of people are "fundamentally" "good" and that they just make mistakes etc.
And I definitely knew about how bad people could be due to access to good history books and parents who told me about things like the Belgian Congo.
But my kid self would have been shocked at how common people being shit to each other is and the incredible scale of damage the most powerful are able to do to the world.
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 1 pts · 2d
Just make sure you're applying the same standards to everyone. Without knowing what the scare quotes mean, there's nothing to argue with, but so so many people have blind spots. Which is part of the problem.
Thrawn@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 2d
Personally I just meant them as being extremely hard to define in this context.
And my self assessment is that I treat everyone the same, giving them the benefit of the doubt, at least until they prove themselves to be malicious. I definitely have no qualms cutting people off who try to actively damage my life.
myyass@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 3d
How much I've started to hate technology. It's like I had smart phones before my peers had flip phones. Same with computers; let me go to the computer graveyard room and put one together for myself. My family was very into tech so I had a computer since I was 5.
I think at this point I'm just not into it. Same with cars; I like my almost thirty year old cars.
Aatube@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 3d
what do you think of Car And Driver? it’s an amazing magazine that makes me wanna get into cars (i am politically urbanist)
myyass@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2d
You know, I never read it so I can't say. It looks like it would be a good read. Personally, I research the engines and transmissions as well as what advanced features cars have. I would rather have a car with a cool suspension and a limit slip differential like my Infiniti (Nissan) than all the electronic bells and whistles modern cars have. I used to have a Volvo, I crashed it twice because I was fighting against all of the "safety" features... I'm not sure why they would put in a system to brake one caliper, but then again this was when Ford bought the company. It was fun to momentum drift in the rain even though it was FWD.
CADmonkey@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 3d
I still cannot belive I am married to my wife. She is amazing. She can basically solve any problem. She is a great mom. She helps me talk through my problems, she helps me make decisions, she can hold up her end of a conversation, and she is beautiful. I've always been fascinated by women in their late 30's or 40's that were still beautiful, and now I have one living in my house.
Jackhammer_Joe@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 3d
Jackpot! Treat her well and never take her for granted
CADmonkey@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 3d
I used to have a little comic I kept at my desk. There was a couple in it, the woman asks the man "where are yoy taking me?" To which he replied "for granted!"
I kept it there as a reminder to myself, to never take my wife for granted, to always work at improving myself and always let her know she is the center of my universe.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 2d
I also choose this person's wife
justdaveisfine@piefed.social · 9 pts · 3d
I had a dead-set career path (game design) and even went to college with this path in mind. When it all came together and I finally had the opportunity to do it, I made a sudden decision against it.
Ended up being the right choice, but I don't think my younger self would believe it.
jellyfishhunter@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 3d
Wow, I could write something similar. It was game dev for me. My younger self prepared for the college path. I didn't deviate. I didn't land a job in the industry and now do something similar, which isn't exactly games (VR training simulations). Best decision of my life.
Younger self might be disappointed I don't make cool games.
kazerniel@piefed.world · 3 pts · 3d
I studied video game art in uni, but left the course after 1.5 years bc it went in a different direction I hoped for (it went all-in on 3D, and the 2D I was actually interested in was done in a month). By that point I already had a part-time job as graphic designer, so I continued that instead, and eventually managed to land a graphic-designer-ish job at a non-profit organisation.
My current job is a lot less glamorous from the outside than video game art, or even a typical graphic design portfolio would be, but I really enjoy it :)
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2d
Some of the teachers said "go to college and get a job like ours", some said trades are a good idea. The one guy was like "you'll move through tens of careers and IT WILL BE GREAT!". But, at no point was flexibility encouraged. It was "find your calling and pursue it ruthlessly". I wasn't sure what to major in going out of high school, because lots of stuff is cool, and they thought that was the worst thing ever.
neidu4@piefed.social · 2 pts · 3d
That made me curious: what's your current field? And has your college degree been useful in another way than originally intended?
anon6789@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 3d
Mid-forties now. Mid-20s me would be surprised to know that yes, he does have major depression and doesn't have to just find a way to work around that. A lot of great things came after that, but many unnecessarily bad things in the interim. Now I'm just what I feel to be a normal amount of depressed! 😅
OldManWithACane@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 3d
40 now. At 20 I was a know-it-all crusader against having kids and now my two children are the absolute center of my universe.
I can't even begin to explain the kind of joy these two kids create out of thin air. It's simply beyond my ability to describe how much I love them and how grateful that I am to have met a woman I loved so much that it seemed wrong to not want to bring more of her into the world.
I am so fucking overwhelmed that my life turned out the way it has that I suffer from hidden imposter syndrome because I just don't feel like I deserve to be this happy.
All I can do is try to be a worthy father and husband.
schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works · 9 pts · 3d
How much of working life is emotional prostitution.
DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works · 8 pts · 3d
50 years old.
Malica@lemmy.zip · 8 pts · 2d
The American experiment ending like this, with not one person standing up for it.
CalypsoGirl@lemmy.today · 3 pts · 2d
But if we stand up against it, we'll be off'ed or thrown into prison. It's not our fault a bunch of despotic tyrranic dystopian oligarch fascists are burning the world down. You say it's our fault if we don't stop them?? How about it's THEIR fault for burning the world down?!
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2d
Well, who's us, and who's them, in that paragraph? Does a congressman count as them? What about a senator, or an ordinary local Republican? There isn't actually any distinction.
The truth is evil is banal, and like always in these parts of history, it's a movement through all stratums of society. The big ones would never have captured that government power without help from the little ones. Not everyone is onboard, so yes, it's probably not your fault, but it's not really just Trump's fault, either.
ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 1 pts · 20h
Propaganda is a helluva drug.
garbagebagel@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 3d
When I was 17 I was fresh out of high school and had no idea what I wanted to study or do. I'm 34 and have studied a myriad of shit by now but I guess what is most surprising is that I still don't know what I want to do.
BoxOfFeet@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 3d
So, second year of college. I would be surprised about my salary vs what that's worth in today's economy. I would have been ecstatic with this back then. Would have thought I was living the dream. Inflation is a bitch.
Also, I probably would be shocked at how cool retro handhelds are now. I just got a Retroid Pocket Nova, and it can play every console I've ever had (I stopped console gaming at the PS2). And, it can run some Windows games. At 19, I was rocking a Windows Mobile 6 PDA, with a 624 MHz processor.
bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 3d
I always used to say I don't wanna be rich. Just 30k a year and I'll be set, I could buy anything I want with that.
30k is poverty now in america.
HubertManne@piefed.social · 2 pts · 3d
I keep on thinking about how many eggs I was making per hour at minimum wage way back when.
starlinguk@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 3d
I'm chronically ill. I was always healthy and skinny and would totally judge fat people.
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 3 pts · 2d
At least you know better now.
I sometimes wonder what percentage of r/fatpeoplehate has since gotten fat, and what percentage of that percentage still isn't sorry.
LettyWhiterock@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 2d
I'm a woman now.
Well 15 year old me, you'll figure it out in about two years.
farmgineer@nord.pub · 6 pts · 3d
Compared to my early 20s, living in rural Japan is probably the most surprising things. As well it should as now my plan is to GTFO to a country that believes more in workers' rights, allows getting citizenship while maintaining an old one (need my US citizenship until my parents pass and Japan has no visa to move them here unless they're basically homeless), etc.
agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works · 6 pts · 3d
Probably how cool and popular I am. 17 year old me was pretty awkward and bad at socializing.
AnarchistArtificer@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2d
Hell yeah
Asafum@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 3d
I'm not sure 20 year old me would be very surprised. I ended up pretty much exactly where it would be expected of me: still single, living in a garage, working a dead end factory job. No possibility of ever owning a home and dwindling possibly for any kind of retirement.
phoenixz@lemmy.ca · 5 pts · 3d
That I'm living on the other side of the world, that I not only am married, but married to a holy crap hot mom.
That I'm now also jobless due to AI
Age 50
HubertManne@piefed.social · 5 pts · 3d
early 50's. did well in school and got a lot of education. I knew I would not necessarily be rich but technically in a meritocracy I should have done pretty well. I should note I have done better than many of the peers both my wife and I know. Most who have done better did so by making good connections. I can't believe how poorly I have had to live and that my retirement is so unsure at this age. Heck I thought the increasing retirement age would reverse itself and advancement would allow for a much more utopian society. lol. also technological miracles beyond my wildest imaginations implemented in dystopian ways beyond my wildest fears.
DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 3d
Mediocre_Bard_Redeux@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 3d
That I'm alive. Suicidal depression is a hell of a drug.
YeahIgotskills2@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 3d
I was a rolling stone - drifting and drinking aimlessly through my 20s, backpacking, boozing and picking up weird jobs and weird people as I wandered through Europe and south east Asia. Now I'm an IT manager and married with 2 kids, a mortgage and a dog.
Aneb@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2d
26, to my 13 self would be wack. I came out at 17, married at 24, divorced at 25. Still the same kid looking for friends and a family. I would've believed my parents would be homophobic at 13 and they still are at 26. I dropped out of college, didn't marry my girlfriend. I'm a chef now, I studied hard to follow my dad into an IT career, that went no where fast.
My 13 yo self would think I'm a loser and an addict. He was very dumb and a 13 yo, lmao wtf do they know.
CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 2d
I’m 40, half a life ago I was 8 years pre-lung transplant. I’d be shocked that I did it at all, I was very anti-transplant for various reasons but having kids I love enter my life when I was 22 changed my mind, which would also be a shocker since I was also anti kids at 20, but I’d also be shocked it worked, one of the main reasons I was against it was I was sure if I got one I would suffer even more and die anyway. So I guess at the end of the day, I’d be mostly surprised I wasn’t dead.
AskewLord@piefed.social · 4 pts · 3d
all the shit i can afford that i never dreamed of even having.
curse of low expectations I guess.
But I'd be super depressed that I never found a partner or had a family. Half a lifetime ago i was dating someone I thought I'd marry and have a family with... then she turned out to hate me and children. And sadly ever I met since her also hated me and children... so better off being single than being with someone who hates me.
hanrahan@slrpnk.net · 4 pts · 3d
that I'm alive, i was 100% convinced in the 1980s i'd be dead by 2000, i'm now 58. and its 2026.
I honestly don't know what the fuck happened; (
frustrated_phagocytosis@fedia.io · 4 pts · 3d
Probably the credit card debt. And learning how long that asshole cat I got as a sophomore in college ended up living (18.5 spiteful years).
Jerb322@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2d
50, second marriage.
CalypsoGirl@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 2d
I like that you included punctuation. It would've meant something quite different without that comma.
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 3 pts · 2d
Going for the high score in serial monogamy.
CalypsoGirl@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 2d
Well that interpretation would be "52nd marriage."
But I wanted to interpret it as "50-second marriage," as in a REALLY short, less than one minute marriage 🤭
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2d
Oh yeah. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, I guess. Lol.
ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 3d
That being successful wouldn't make things worth it or life more bearable.
I guess I was using the wrong metric.
DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 3d
100%. Turns out you're always still going to be you. There's no magic line to cross. You're the same living, breathing entity experiencing the same linear stream of existence.
Jeffool@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2d
I'm 45 now. If you would have told me at half my age how angry and sad I am in general, I probably would've been very confused and broken hearted. I guess the time is important for the desensitization.
AAA@feddit.org · 3 pts · 3d
I'd be astonished how I can feel existential uncertainty while having the salary I currently have.
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2d
Interesting. Was it lifestyle creep, or did you start a family or something?
buzz86us@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2d
That I'm driving an electric car. In highschool this would have felt impossible after GM blew up their lead.
zout@fedia.io · 3 pts · 3d
25 year old me would be surprised that I switched jobs a few times, got my bachelors degree and don't work as a plant operator anymore. He would be most surprised about which people are still a major part of my life, and which turned out to be not worth it.
AnarchistArtificer@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 2d
I'm 29. I'd be surprised I'm still alive.
When I was a depressed and extremely suicidal teenager, I decided that if nothing had improved for me by the time I was 20, then I'd kill myself then. When I set that time limit, I already had a couple of failed attempts under my belt (unbeknownst to my family), and desperately wanted to die. However, I felt guilty for the pain that would cause, which is why the attempts only happened when I reached a crisis point.
I had read suicide support guidance that advised to try and put distance between yourself and the suicidal feelings, because even just a day or two can help to stabilise the situation. Well my response was to take this logic and apply it to an extreme level, with significant spite attached. My logic was that if indeed things were just as hopeless when I was 20, I would feel justified in killing myself, and fuck anyone who would begrudge me my escape at that point. I didn't require things to be better-better by the time I was 20, I just needed something to change to show that it was still worth fighting.
Well, here I am, almost 10 years later, and I'm still alive. still struggle with suicidal ideation on a regular basis, and I suspect I will always have to keep an eye on my mental health. However, nowadays, when I get low, I don't actively want to die like I used to. Instead, it's usually a case of "I don't want to die, but I know I can't live like this".
Ironically, I think that planning my death saved my life. There were countless times over my late teens where I would've been at risk of making another attempt on my life, but instead would self soothe by counting down how much time I had left to ensure. It did mean that my early 20s were a bit confusing, as I was living a life that I had planned without ever expecting that I'd get that far. And I still sort of feel like these past 10 years have been a massive bonus level that I'm half expecting to be swept away from me at any moment, but I'm still here.
There are other things I could have replied to this question with, but nothing will trump my surprise at still being alive (and wanting to be)
some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org · 3 pts · 2d
That I could love myself. That I'd be a productive member of society. That I'd be a square.
Suck_on_my_Presence@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 3d
At 17, I would have been ungodly shocked to know that those fainting episodes were part of something much much bigger. I'd be a little put off by how sedentary I become, but at least I'm still fighting the good fight.
I think I also would be fairly shocked to see myself as gay.
Young me would have a hell of an emotional rollercoaster to see current me for certain, lol
HubertManne@piefed.social · 2 pts · 3d
I have to say that I to am surprised at how sedentary I was. I get around but man I used to bike and walk so much. Used to be minimum of miles per day and now its miles per week.
Suck_on_my_Presence@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 3d
It's pretty crazy at how easy it is to just settle in.
I m grateful that I still do/am able to get in 2-3 miles per day. Not much, but it's at least something. Thanks to my dog
HubertManne@piefed.social · 1 pts · 2d
2-3 aint bad.
daggermoon@piefed.world · 2 pts · 3d
Late 20's, most surprising would be the fact that i'm no better off than I was when I got out of high school.
Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 2d
This is relatable and I hate it.
PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 2d
How boring I am
HerbalGamer@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 2d
that I'm still exactly nowhere
iamthetot@piefed.ca · 2 pts · 3d
My eating habits.
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org · 2 pts · 2d
How badly everything has gone.
The hair loss would be news, but I wouldn't really be surprised. I knew it happens.
theherk@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 3d
Nearly all details would fascinate me, but nothing would shock me.
bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works · 2 pts · 3d
This is interesting to think. I wouldn't be that surprised at my life. I did the stuff i wanted to, nothing crazy has happened really. I still do a lot of the same hobbies I did 20 years ago, just with more money. I would think emulation is fricken sweet as well as all the console mods that exist now.
I'd be massively depressed at the state of the world. Makes me wonder how much worse itll get in another 20 years.
chunes@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 3d
swelter_spark@reddthat.com · 1 pts · 2d
I would be surprised that I'm with the person I'm with, living where I am.
unidentifiedfelineobject@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 1 pts · 3d
Kolanaki@pawb.social · 1 pts · 2d
Half a life time ago, I was 20 and the only thing different between then and now that really would surprise 20 year old me would be hearing I have ADHD, BPD, and am autistic since I wasn't diagnosed until my 30s.
Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 2d
The amount of weed I smoke. Teenage-me was still in the process of deprogramming from D.A.R.E. propaganda. She wouldn't have expected to become a full-blown stoner in her 30s.
I've always had a strong memory, and unfortunately it feeds into my anxiety and depression. Weed definitely impacts my memory, but it's a benefit - normally, all the stupid little things of the day would torture me. I'd be overanalyzing every word I said, worrying over social mistakes that nobody else even remembers happening. It's a mental process that only serves to hurt me, and that I raw-dogged sober for most of my life. Weed lets me break that cycle, change my focus, and not remember all the dumb little details that don't actually matter, but that would otherwise keep me awake at night.
As a teen, I would've struggled to understand that there could be benefits to marijuana. She would've just thought the self-torture was normal. Life's weird like that sometimes.
Zannsolo@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 3d
Early 40s, and I have 2 young kids, I was going to be child free right up until I met my wife 5 years ago and knew if I wanted her kids were in my future. I also really enjoy being a dad.
Quexotic@infosec.pub · 0 pts · 2d
That if I told you, I'd have to kill you.