Pete Hegseth Announces New Required Pentagon Testosterone Tests

https://www.newsweek.com/hegseth-announces-new-required-pentagon-testosterone-tests-who-it-impacts-12200211

443 points · 179 comments · view on lemmy.world

179 Comments

treehugger6@lemmy.world · 211 pts · 39d (17 replies)
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Astronut@lemmy.zip · 83 pts · 39d (2 replies)

The problem with fucking idiots is that they’re always fucking other fucking idiots and creating more fucken fucking idiots!

voidsignal@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 39d

They are rabbits. Incredibly stupid rabbits

PseudoSpock@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 2 pts · 39d

Loosergenics

SippyCup@lemmy.world · 66 pts · 39d (11 replies)

I fucking hate this comparison.

The government in Idiocracy actually tried. They were just idiots. The bad guy in that movie is stupidity.

When these comparisons started that wasn't even a fair comparison. And I mean like, it was common enough when W. was still in office, among the like 10 people who had seen it by that time.

We have actively malicious state actors who love that you're so willing to believe they're only stupid.

Also Mike Judge is terrified of poor people.

NuXCOM_90Percent@lemmy.zip · 15 pts · 39d

I mean... the bad guy in Idiocracy is actually "inferior genetics" and "the poors", Like... I find it hilarious but holy fuck did that movie do a lot for advancing eugenics among the cultural zeitgeist...

But yeah. President Comacho actually cared and was trying to make the world better. And once Not Sure showed them that toilet water worked, they used it. Rather than insisting on shoving horse medicine up their asses out of spite.

BassTurd@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 39d

It's an apt reference when talking about the population rather than the government. But you're right. Camacho was an infinitely better president that actively listened to the smartest person in the world. He was surrounded by idiots too, but he tried.

WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today · 5 pts · 39d (7 replies)

Care to clue in those of us who aren't celebrity watchers, and know nothing about Mike Judge?

SippyCup@lemmy.world · -2 pts · 39d (6 replies)

Mike Judge is the creative mind behind Idiocracy, king of the hill, and office space. A core theme behind the first two is "poor people are stupid and crazy."

13igTyme@piefed.social · 15 pts · 39d (3 replies)

The theme of king of the hill is not poor people are stupid.

NuXCOM_90Percent@lemmy.zip · -2 pts · 39d (2 replies)

I would disagree with it being a core theme. But most of Judge's work very much punches down on poor people. Whether it is Beavis and Butthead living in squalor and working at a mcdonald's (and most of their villains being "trailer trash") or many of Hank's "villains" also being "white trash". And a big theme of the first few seasons was Luanne triumphing against having grown up poor.

And... I love Office Space but it is hard to not look at Peter choosing to be a construction worker to be happy as "willful stupidity is bliss".

To my knowledge, Idiocracy is the only thing where he took that farther since the entire movie is predicated on Smoothie becoming Smoothie too soon and the eugenics that followed. Which... I think Idiocracy is funny (even if it is probably too painful to watch these days) but holy shit was that movie pushing eugenics harder than that creepy house Waypoint stayed at for an E3. Especially when the closing gag is something like "Not Sure and Rita had three of the smartest and most beautiful children ever. Dax Shepard had fifty of the dumbest".

13igTyme@piefed.social · 6 pts · 39d (1 reply)

If we ignore the wealthy "villains" in King o the Hill like Strickland, Thatherton, Kan, and the occasional rich people through out the show, then sure that could be a correct statement.

There was even an episode where a rich investor from out of state was being an ass and wanted to get the "Authentic" Texan experience but Hank eventually got fed up.

NuXCOM_90Percent@lemmy.zip · -3 pts · 39d

Strickland is 100% "money can't buy class". And there were multiple (?) episodes where Minh and Kahn lost their money and "lived as hillbillies" as it were.

But sure. Feel free to focus on a few exceptions to completely ignore the entire rest of the pattern. This IS reddit after all.


I think you might be doing what a lot of people are. You look at Hank and you say "he isn't rich, he is middle class". And you fixate on when the upper class (like Kahn, even though he lives in the same neighborhood) get what is coming to them.

But you, like most people, ignore how often "the poors" are the villains and are punched down on. Folk like Jimmy and Lucky (although he mostly was comic relief) and so forth.

Which... gets back to Idiocracy. Smoothie and his wife were definitely rich academics. But Not Sure is the very definition of average. He is the everyman. It is just that the world has become so much stupider and so much poorer than he is and...

WhoIzDisIz@lemmy.today · 4 pts · 39d (1 reply)

It's been a LONG time since I watched either of them, so I'll have to rewatch some with that perspective in mind. Seems a bit exaggerated to me, but I suppose it's possible. Thanks for explaining.

Yeoldetelephone@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 39d

Just think of the IQ/reproduction sequence at the start and the kinds of people that were used to represent high and low IQ.

anomnom@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 39d

The government of idiocracy is decades after the stage we’re in now, but we seem to be in the prologue part of that movie, if not further in.

hanrahan@slrpnk.net · 2 pts · 38d

mehhh, they realised they were idiots and consulted the smartest dude around. We wish it was Idiocracy

YouTalkinToMe@lemmy.wtf · 1 pts · 39d

This one goes in your butt..uh...mouth

ryokimball@infosec.pub · 126 pts · 39d (1 reply)

Forcing Heavily recommending gender affirming care.

CileTheSane@lemmy.ca · 17 pts · 39d

Once again being so anti-trans they end up harming more cis people than trans people.

Sanctus@anarchist.nexus · 94 pts · 39d (20 replies)

All these old MAGAts and fuckfaces take testosterone supplements so fucken much. The old owner of the company I work at was one of these dudes. Its all about being s teenager forever.

Tolookah@discuss.tchncs.de · 137 pts · 39d (19 replies)

That sounds like gender affirming care. They should practice what they preach.

Sanctus@anarchist.nexus · 50 pts · 39d

They will stare deadpanned directly into your eyes and tell you its somehow not.

GalacticGrapefruit@lemmy.world · 33 pts · 39d (2 replies)

Genuinely, it is gender affirming care. It's replacing sex hormones their body won't produce naturally, to counteract effects that are existentially devastating to their psyche.

They don't wanna say that low-T as an older man feels like gender dysphoria. But have a conversation with a trans guy and an old man about testosterone levels and masculinity and self-image, and you'll have almost the exact same complaint. "I just want to feel like the man I know I am inside."

Monument@piefed.world · 11 pts · 39d (1 reply)

As a not-old guy with low testosterone, I just have an intractable depression.

It sorta responds to antidepressants. It sorta responds to sunlight therapy. It sorta responds to keeping a handle on my diet and exercise.

Sometimes it’s worse, sometimes it’s better. But I’m almost always struggling with not having energy, being irritable, and feeling overwhelmed.

Going on testosterone was like “ooooh, that’s what that’s supposed to be like.”

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 38d

As a trans woman, yeah that's basically how I felt before estrogen. Well that and my proprioception regularly asking where the hell my tits were.

AutistoMephisto@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 39d (14 replies)

UPDATE: After taking all the responses to this into consideration, I now understand testosterone therapy to indeed be gender affirming care but Hegseth and the "Manosphere" crowd he identifies with prefer to affirm their gender by denying their age. They still want to be the "studs" they (thought) they were in high school. They're the same guys who wax nostalgically about their "glory days" when they were on the football team and how they "led the team to win the regionals"(but not state) and they "coulda gone pro" but one of "those people(you know who they're referring to)", "stole" their scholarship.

DokPsy@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 39d (8 replies)

So they're affirming their desired gender ideal state?

AutistoMephisto@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 39d (6 replies)

Hmm. I didn't think of it like that, but I never considered that either gender has an "ideal state". It's also, I suppose that, for them, at least, that gender doesn't really factor into their desired state.

ReptilianCleric@lemmy.zip · 9 pts · 39d (4 replies)

I disagree. Their gender is their identity, that's why they're so afraid of trans people.

AutistoMephisto@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 39d (3 replies)

You know, now that you say it, it makes sense. They're affirming their gender to deny their age. When they look back at their teenage years and/or their early 20's, that's when (they believe) they were at their "most maximal manliest manliness", or in biology terms, the point when their testosterone levels were at their highest. As soon as a man hits 30, it's all downhill from there. And I speak from experience as a 35-year-old white guy. Some of my shit doesn't work how it did in my 20's. Some parts of me now ache that previously did not. It's harder for me to get up from a sitting position than it used to be. But I don't think the answer for that is to amp up my testosterone levels to try and go through puberty again.

GreenBeard@lemmy.ca · 6 pts · 39d

The real heart of the issue is that they have such a small idea of what constitutes masculinity, that they're utterly incapable of defining male as anything but a 20 year old getting drunk, playing sports, and breaking things. They don't understand anything that isn't just that. Mature masculinity, doesn't exist in their world. Men don't nurture, men don't learn, men don't grow. They don't teach, they scream. They don't support, they attack. They don't create, the break. It's a very sad world view. Aging gracefully, mentoring, collaborating, building a community, engaging in art, in self-expression, investing time and effort into people, all of that is "girl stuff." Even having a family, what they want are trophies of their sexual conquest, not relationships. They don't want to guide and mentor or participate in their kids lives. They want the glory. They make themselves so shallow, anyone with any depth at all is a threat.

DokPsy@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 39d

Oh, gender absolutely does factor in. Women are seen as lesser because misogyny. And, while the normal person wouldn't consider there to be an ideal state, these people definitely have one in mind. It's toxic hyper masculinity on meth

Kowowow@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 39d

The me I that I didn't realize I was imagining when I was thinking of myself doing cool stuff

dhork@lemmy.world · 18 pts · 39d (3 replies)

Did they score 4 touchdowns in one game?

BigPotato@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 39d (1 reply)

I'd much rather they were all shoe salesmen instead of running the Pentagon.

psycho_driver@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 38d

Manager of a Shoe Store might be a tough ask for Kegsbreath.

SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca · 2 pts · 37d

Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 39d

Every week they have to regale you with tales of how they scored 4 touchdowns in one game for Polk High

sportsjorts@lemmy.zip · 75 pts · 39d

I just can’t. No one ever suspected that there were a group of people who could be so fucking brain dead and stupid that it would become some sort of superpower. Like the dumbest most inept motherfuckers. MAGA are pedophiles accomplices and idiots of the highest order.

Rentlar@lemmy.ca · 65 pts · 39d

In other words, Pete Hegseth introduces mandatory gender-affirming tests as part of servicemember health evaluations.

SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 59 pts · 39d (5 replies)

How the fuck is this not The Onion

Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 39d (2 replies)

You could say that about 4-7 headlines per day

SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 39d (1 reply)

Yeah, but this one really surprised me. It was very clearly satire until I actually checked the source, and I'm usually expecting absurdity.

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 38d

Unfortunately to me this felt like a natural evolution of where they've been going

blx@piefed.zip · 2 pts · 39d (1 reply)

My thoughts exactly. What next? Witch swimming?

SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 39d

Probably. Like, seriously.

dhork@lemmy.world · 34 pts · 39d (2 replies)

He seems to be obsessed with the purity of bodily fluids, just like Jack D. Ripper. Even looks a little like him.

SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world · 13 pts · 39d (1 reply)

You have to protect yourself that's why I only drink grain alcohol and rainwater.

scutiger@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 39d

You ever see a Russky drink tapwater, Mandrake?

rogsson@piefed.social · 30 pts · 39d (3 replies)

u can’t make this shit up

turdburglar@piefed.social · 13 pts · 39d

i mean, you could, but who would believe you?

tacoplease@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 39d

Poor Onion

austin@piefed.social · 1 pts · 39d

I never understood the prase "you can't make this shit up." Because... you can. But I think this time I finally get it.

trackball_fetish@lemmy.wtf · 30 pts · 39d (1 reply)

One step away from penis inspection day

matlag@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 38d

I was thinking the next step will be to weighs men's balls, but yeah, dicks size should do.

hoppeduponcoffee@lemmy.zip · 28 pts · 39d (4 replies)

Yes, let’s also pump them full of methamphetamine and we’ll create good little Sturmtruppens to do the füeher’s bidding.

Lasherz12@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 39d (3 replies)

They already do for special forces.

NuXCOM_90Percent@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 39d (2 replies)

And it is a pretty open secret amongst pilots.

deacon@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 39d (1 reply)

I don’t know why I’m scandalized by anything anymore but I’m scandalized by this.

NuXCOM_90Percent@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 39d

I mean, it is long stretches of night flying (generally staring into bright NVGs for extra eye strain) where they have to stay on edge for hours at a time. And it has the same culture of special forces where "it is a privilege to do this and only the best can earn it" which pushes people to push themselves even further.

So... think about that when you hear about helicopters and planes mysteriously crashing into each other or failing on missions.

ulkesh@piefed.social · 26 pts · 39d (4 replies)

This guy is such a pussy. He overcompensates all the time and clearly has an inferiority complex. Must have a rather tiny penis to think being that macho is somehow important or a good thing. Probably an incel, too.

1995ToyotaCorolla@lemmy.world · 16 pts · 39d (2 replies)

He's an insult to pussies and penises alike. He's smooth down there, like a ken doll

tmyakal@infosec.pub · 3 pts · 38d

Hey, Ken only liked the patriarchy when he thought it was about horses. These pieces of shit aren't K'enough.

phutatorius@lemmy.zip · 1 pts · 38d

Nullo energy.

GutterRat42@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 38d

His lifting and pullup form is shit too

tea_n_typewriters@lemmy.world · 25 pts · 39d

Prioritizing testosterone makes a lot of sense when you’re an anthropomorphic scrotum.

SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 25 pts · 39d (6 replies)

What the fuck is wrong with these people

Almacca@aussie.zone · 6 pts · 39d (3 replies)

Too much testosterone?

psycho_driver@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 38d

I bet Pete's at about tree fiddy or less. Alcoholics struggle to have normal test levels.

kolmaskommentoija@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 37d (1 reply)
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Almacca@aussie.zone · 2 pts · 37d

That might explain why he's such a tit.

Snailpick42@lemmus.org · 4 pts · 39d

There is this book you see....that advocates evil. Republicans really like this book. Even Trump has his version of it.

kreskin@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 39d

They all need hugs and a nappy change.

Bristlecone@lemmy.world · 24 pts · 38d (4 replies)

Whaaaaaaaat? The fuck is going on with toxic masculinity? The dudes are not ok

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 38d

They feel weak and vulnerable and are reaching to testosterone for the solution instead of emotional maturity

P1k1e@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 38d (2 replies)

Never have been

Bristlecone@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 38d (1 reply)

Crazy to me that they don't want the military mandating that they have to take the flu shot, but these weird macho dudes are just fine getting their hormone levels checked and submitting them to the army. I am at such a loss with society

P1k1e@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 38d

It's all based in insecurity, it's gay to prevent illness because your already too manly and strong to get sick, but showing off how T'ed up you are is a privilege

Edit: autocorrect is stupid

tigermountain@lemmy.world · 22 pts · 38d (8 replies)

This is an aspect of totalitarianism. When a government attempts to subordinate all of society to a single ideology and state control. This is an attempt to elevate the idea of the strong, virile, white male as one of the solutions to all of our problems. It supports the approach in Iran where all we have to do is bomb them back to the stone age in order to "win". Another example is when Hegseth made all the generals come to Washington, in person, to dress them down, or to rename the Department of Defense to the Department of War, or to stop the promotion of women to higher ranks. Not only does it tie in nicely with the incompetence of the administration, because, what is the need for thinking through things or considering the consequences of actions when all you need is might, but it also serves as a distraction to the dangers happening behind the scenes like Russell Vought dismantling the federal government or the unimpeded creation of the surveillance state or the rise of unelected oligarchs who have far too much influence on society. And don't even get me started about the complete inability of the democrats to meet this moment.

SnarkoPolo@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 38d (7 replies)

As this trickles down into American culture at large, the US is going to become a violent society. Casual violence, fights and road rage shootings, will be common. And the entire mentality will be dog-eat-dog, if you help someone you're pussified.

Banana@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 38d (2 replies)

Become? Will be?

lando55@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 38d (1 reply)

Confused, would we?

Banana@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 38d

Are

Soup@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 37d

That’s literally what the US is right now, dude.

MehBlah@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 37d (2 replies)

Heh, We already live like this. Thanks to the few the majority have to suffer through this without any hope that the powers that be will do anything useful to curb this behavior.

This morning I took my usual route to work. Its not the most popular route taking five to ten minutes longer from day to day than the main route. Its a two lane road with three spots where the lane expands to two lanes. For the most part its stress free which is worth more to me than five or ten minutes a day of my time.

Today however I was honked at and flipped off for four miles because the type A(Asshole) was mad because when the extra lane ended he didn't race to me in time to go around me. In this fools mind I had done him wrong by not pulling over to let him by. Four miles later the road expands in to a large two lane with a turn lane going both ways.

I blew him a kiss as he flipped me off when he went around.

bedifferent@mastodon.social · 3 pts · 37d (1 reply)

@MehBlah @SnarkoPolo Sounds like a maggot. Be careful. You never know what the idiot will do.

MehBlah@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 37d

Naw, this guy wasn't. Just another dipshit who is mad at everyone except the source of their problems. Which of course is them and only them.

RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world · 21 pts · 39d

Gender affirming care.

Brown5500@sh.itjust.works · 21 pts · 39d (2 replies)

In fairness, TBIs can cause long term testosterone deficiency. This isn't the worst idea for combat veterans... assuming that the reason is to get them proper medical care

Narrator: that was not the reason.

NotEasyBeingGreen@slrpnk.net · 1 pts · 38d

The fine article says that low testosterone occurs in like 2% of men, and screening is not recommended (as opposed to testing due to some symptoms).

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 38d

In thst case the best call would be screening for symptoms and possibly including sex hormones in any regular blood tests. The symptoms are necessary for the diagnosis because plenty of people are fine at below average levels

diablicja@lemmy.zip · 20 pts · 39d (7 replies)

trackball_fetish@lemmy.wtf · 7 pts · 39d (1 reply)

Dude in the upper right hand, holy shit

GreenBeard@lemmy.ca · 13 pts · 39d

That's Henry Cavill

unemployedclaquer@sopuli.xyz · 1 pts · 39d (4 replies)

Can I get more context please

As the one thing goes down the other too ?

LodeMike@lemmy.today · 9 pts · 39d (3 replies)

As IQ goes up, testosterone trends down

unemployedclaquer@sopuli.xyz · 2 pts · 39d (2 replies)

Sorry I fail at silly

LodeMike@lemmy.today · 7 pts · 39d (1 reply)

You can also read it the opposite way, as in higher testosterone trends IQ down

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 38d

We're going to need to study IQ before and after testosterone treatment

spacegoat@lemmy.world · 20 pts · 39d (1 reply)

This guy beats women and more than likely rapes children

Snailpick42@lemmus.org · 6 pts · 39d

Typical Christians. Their holy book / deity advocate for all the things you listed and more evil.

chewypoops@lemmy.world · 19 pts · 38d (3 replies)

Low-T isn't even a real problem worth testing for like this. I'm not against testing for it when medically helpful, but the very public nature of this announcement sounds more like an attempt at signalling pro-masculine virtue rather than to tackle a real problem.

This nonsense is antithetical to a healthy military. Republicans always make the very self-destructive choice of using the military as a testing ground for their weird ideas, in a way that disincentivises employment with it.

When they wanted to purge trans people, they started with the military, because it was the biggest thing they had any control over. Lots of talented people left for the private sector with damage to morale as well. Now they're projecting their male fragility delusions onto the military in hopes that they can become more masculine and therefore "strong".

None of this does anything to make the military better at what it does. It's like Hegseth looked at UFC fighters (some of the most useless dumbasses in existence) and decided they were even stronger than our troops. It's like the military has low confidence in its sexuality, and is overcompensating. It's a bizarre look.

tmyakal@infosec.pub · 10 pts · 38d (2 replies)

My question is, do generals found to have low T need to start taking supplements? Are they going to receive gender-affirming care?!

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 38d (1 reply)

Article says it will be optional, but I suspect it will be "optional"

Madison420@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 38d

That's exactly it. Optional in the military means you're doing it or you're going to have a promotion deficiency and your career will suffer for it.

SpaceCowboy@lemmy.ca · 17 pts · 39d

What a fucking weirdo.

notsure@fedia.io · 15 pts · 39d

...this is the onion, right? ..right?

givesomefucks@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 39d

Walking right up to the line of mandatoring "gender hormone therapy"...

While the screenings will be mandatory for eligible service members, Hegseth said that any resulting treatment would remain voluntary. "If treatment is recommended, it's entirely your choice to receive testosterone replacement therapy," he said.

fritobugger2017@lemmy.world · 15 pts · 39d

That is some seriously tiny dick energy.

Professorozone@lemmy.world · 14 pts · 39d

I thought this was the Onion. WTF?

NoneOfUrBusiness@fedia.io · 13 pts · 39d

Gotta love it when evil assholes sabotage themselves.

MehBlah@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 39d

Oh wait this isn't the onion. Of course it isn't. I wonder what his is. He doesn't look bald at all.

CharlesDarwin@lemmy.world · 12 pts · 39d (1 reply)

This guy has a micropenis, doesn't he?

Captainvaqina@sh.itjust.works · 7 pts · 39d

Absolutely 1,000% without a doubt a 2.5in erect peen.

minorkeys@sh.itjust.works · 12 pts · 39d

Loyalty, instead of competence. Testosterone instead of wisdom.

grumpusbumpus@lemmy.world · 11 pts · 39d (1 reply)

I notice it doesn't mention sex or gender, at least not at the start of the article. Sooo, testosterone for everyone? The Pedo Class won't be satisfied till we've 'roid-raged ourselves into nuclear holocaust.

Also, for fuck's sake, how is this not gender-affirming care?

altphoto@lemmy.today · 2 pts · 39d

You know Lindsay right? He used to be Lindsay as a kid. Joined the forces and started taking testosterone...and yada yada yada....he became the person we knew as Lindsay.

SabinStargem@lemmy.today · 11 pts · 38d

While it is good that the Regime will lose many capable soldiers...I must say, this is lame and will feature as a WTF in history videos to come. We will literally have this as one of the many reasons why the Regime lost the 2nd American Civil War, if it comes down to it.

It is just weird and stupid. 🤷‍♂️

lemmelemmy@feddit.org · 10 pts · 39d

This is kinda thing was was something you’d see in South Park.

MareOfNights@discuss.tchncs.de · 10 pts · 39d

Wait, WHO is forcing hormones down our throat?

Danarchy@lemmy.nz · 10 pts · 39d

This will surely not result in more hot guy on guy action

BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today · 9 pts · 38d (5 replies)

Let me guess, he's going to do the assessments personally, by cupping the balls of only the most manly of soldiers, because he can judge the amount of testosterone by the weight.

RFK, Jr showed them how to do it, he's been doing it all his life, and they all had a hilarious night in the Oval Office, practicing on each other. Stephen "PeeWee Himmler" Miller had the tiniest balls, and cried about it. It was hilarious.

Good times, good times...

CADmonkey@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 38d (4 replies)

Testicle phrenology?

lilacintheshade@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 38d (3 replies)

I didn't need to think of either calipers or high-ranking officials' smallest insecurities today, but here we are.

CADmonkey@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 38d (2 replies)

But how will we know it's thier smallest insecurity unless we measure...

lilacintheshade@lemmy.zip · 2 pts · 38d (1 reply)

Normally I'm a "show me the evidence" gal, but I'm willing to leave it at speculation in this case. I think I've seen enough, nevermind measuring. 🫩

CADmonkey@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 37d

I have to agree.

fartographer@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 38d (2 replies)

Here's my uneducated conspiracy-focused take on why the military would want mandatory HRT:

  • This is not an attempt to make soldiers more battle-ready, it's to make the population more aggressive
  • the baseline for low-T in the military will either be raised, or final determinations will be based on arbitrary factors or performance-based. They want to push people's hormones to the point that they'll attack the women on base and need only the slightest nudge to attack anyone who pisses them off back home.
  • While on the military HRT, increased libido and aggression will create pockets of men who will fuck anything, and increase the population for the next generation of disenfranchised workers
  • The increased aggression and government propaganda would make soldiers more likely to vote for politicians who express hatred that aligns with their own
  • Retired members of the military who can't afford continued HRT and maintain testosterone levels elevated above recommended levels will likely become prematurely impotent. Considering that the people currently in charge learn all the facts from TV shows, they'd probably be banking on the ol' "this man went on a killing spree because he was impotent, and murdering women who look like his mother was the only way to prove that he's not impotent."

My most pessimistic prediction is that they're hoping the outcome of this to include increased rates of violence stateside, high levels of pregnant sexual assault victims, soldiers who want to stay in the military because they have so much more energy while enlisted, retired military-turned-cops who are more likely to shoot minorities, increased post-military ICE applicants for better-trained forces, voters who don't know why they hate everyone who isn't themselves and will irrationally vote for anyone who calls minorities "scum," and fulfill their strange obsession with sexy/manly looking men cum gutters and all.

I also think that if they actually follow through with military-required HRT, pulmonary embolisms and prostate cancer would become the symptoms this generation's Agent Orange.

lightnsfw@reddthat.com · 13 pts · 38d (1 reply)

I think Hegseth's just a little bitch who heard a commercial for a testosterone clinic that made him feel emasculated and decided to project that feeling onto the entire military.

fartographer@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 38d

That's way more likely. I'm not sure if I made it clear in my comment, but these weren't my best thoughts. This was me kinda seeing how tightly I could wrap the foil around my brain, because the proposal itself is so blindingly stupid.

SnarkoPolo@lemmy.world · 9 pts · 38d (1 reply)

The United States has officially become self-satire.

We're not even a real fascist country. Sad.

Dymonika@lemmy.ml · 1 pts · 38d

Hey, I'll take that over "a real fascist country"...

captainlezbian@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 38d

As someone who takes hormones, I don't understand why so many people are getting into taking supplemental hormones without symptoms of deficiency or something like being trans or into steroids. It's inconvenient at best.

And yeah, I suspect we're going to find an outbreak of gynecomastia in the military because of this.

Deathgl0be@lemmy.world · 8 pts · 39d (2 replies)

psycho_driver@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 38d (1 reply)

What did he name the baby?

Deathgl0be@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 38d

Little hernia?

CobraChicken3000@lemmy.ca · 8 pts · 39d (1 reply)

"Exclusive: Secretary of War, Pete Kegsbreath, has decreed that he will personally test the virility of our combat troops by physical examination."

Doomsider@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 39d

If they get an erection while he has sex with them they are kicked out for making it gay.

StupidBrotherInLaw@lemmy.world · 7 pts · 38d (1 reply)

"...It's not about artificial enhancement," [Hegseth] said. "It's about restoring and optimizing your natural capabilities, protecting your longevity, ensuring you have the biological foundation required to sustain the fight."

"But wait, there's more! Order in the next thirty minutes and you'll receive a second month's supply of my Big Pete's Big T Fight Boost for just the cost of shipping and handling! That's a 200 Trump Coin value!"

"Don't delay - order now!"

Madison420@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 38d

Ironically he doesn't realize he's pushing for gender affirming care in the language of gender care advocates.

quick_snail@feddit.nl · 7 pts · 39d

Is he testing women too??

Edit: yes, probably

The Department of Defense declined to confirm to Newsweek if female soldiers will be included in the screening program.

Low testosterone can be an issue in women's health. Testosterone production in women occurs primarily in the ovaries and adrenal glands, although at significantly lower rates than in men, and when levels drop below their optimal range, women can suffer significant symptoms including fatigue, mood changes, poor sleep, low libido and sexual dysfunction.

PedroMaldonado@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 39d

Seriously thought it was The Onion

rafoix@lemmy.zip · 6 pts · 39d

Antivax is okay but they gotta give up blood to appease their master.

foggy@lemmy.world · 6 pts · 39d

Bro loves manly men.

Hadriscus@jlai.lu · 6 pts · 39d

the parody never ends

Pulsar@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 39d

More material for Colin Jost, I guess. Something reality seems more far-fetched than what any comedian or writer could imagine.

bold_atlas@lemmy.world · 5 pts · 39d

This is humiliation and punishment of the US military for failing to give Trump a victory in Iran. He doesn't like losers.

pelespirit@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 39d (2 replies)

Is this to get rid of the women? *Or maybe to make the older soldiers "look better"?

Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth announced Wednesday that the Pentagon will begin requiring annual testosterone deficiency screenings for active-duty service members age 30 and older, saying the move is designed to improve military readiness and support long-term health.

While the screenings will be mandatory for eligible service members, Hegseth said that any resulting treatment would remain voluntary. "If treatment is recommended, it's entirely your choice to receive testosterone replacement therapy," he said.

floofloof@lemmy.ca · 9 pts · 39d (1 reply)

I don't know, but "testosterone replacement therapy" is most certainly gender-affirming care. But since they're not forcing it, I assume this is to institutionalize the bullying and harassment of men the testosterone-addled meatheads don't consider manly enough or women they consider too manly. And we can expect that to include routinely accusing those without the "right" amount of testosterone of being transgender and kicking them out of the military.

pelespirit@sh.itjust.works · 1 pts · 39d

Please let them all be magas that get kicked out.

Zier@fedia.io · 5 pts · 39d

This alcoholic power bottom wants to make sure all the men around him are as "manly" as possible.

Clutter@sh.itjust.works · 5 pts · 39d

He should worry more about the ICC investigating him...

VibeSurgeon@piefed.social · 4 pts · 37d (1 reply)

Imagine being in a patheticism competition and your opponent is Pete Hegseth

MehBlah@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 37d

Sounds unwinnable to me.

TryingToBeGood@reddthat.com · 4 pts · 39d

what in the actual flying fuck??

rayyy@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 39d

Pete KegSith is a pussy and a moron. His wife would have to piss into the cup for him to pass the test.

spacegoat@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 39d

The same class of people who caused the economic and environmental conditions which caused widespread testosterone diminishment are fixated on addressing it as a matter of individual masculinity.

These Nazis control our society

Gammelfisch@lemmy.world · 4 pts · 39d

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, they will not have enough troops to invade Iran.

santa@sh.itjust.works · 4 pts · 39d

The focus of these goons is off. They care more about who is protecting us than if we are protected.

TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 39d

Delascas@feddit.uk · 3 pts · 39d

Wait. Today is not April 1st is it?

ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com · 3 pts · 38d

Next up: Statistics show a disproportionate number if bald guys at Pentagon.

Pistachio@lemmy.zip · 3 pts · 39d

Mouth swabs only

nullspace@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 39d

Why would this matter other than Hegseth wanting to have gay orgies?

DarkCloud@lemmy.world · 3 pts · 39d

Yes, let's also have the whole of Trump's administration do this, and all Republicans and related staff.

Let's also go over their criminal histories and do that test where they're exposed to different images and the blood flow of their penises is measured.

Let's really piss everyone off, and make them all fight!

frustrated_phagocytosis@fedia.io · 3 pts · 39d (5 replies)

I hope they force them to take extra testosterone so their sperm counts plummet and no babies are made. Also hope it jumpstarts a bunch of aging problems and cancers, fuck the military.

Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 39d (4 replies)

There’s not any evidence that happens from HRT.

frustrated_phagocytosis@fedia.io · 2 pts · 39d (3 replies)

Exogenous testosterone drops sperm counts. Testosterone promotes hormone sensitive tumor growth.

Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 9 pts · 39d (2 replies)

Testosterone being associated with prostate cancer doesn’t mean HRT causes it. Rather, what causes the cancer also causes raised testosterone. In studies following men on HRT the incidence of prostate cancer was no higher in them than in men not on HRT.

Not spreading medical misinformation is free.

frustrated_phagocytosis@fedia.io · 1 pts · 39d (1 reply)

What misinformation?

Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 3 pts · 39d

Testosterone HRT does not cause cancer.

Janx@piefed.social · 3 pts · 39d

I think Kegsbreath should be required to take sobriety tests, but it's not my call...

prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone · 2 pts · 39d

I hope they cripple our military

quick_snail@feddit.nl · 2 pts · 39d

This is the guy from Dr Strangelove that falls down a YouTube rabbit hole about preserving precious bodily fluids, commandeers a nuclear facility, and causes the end of the world.

Rivermoonwolf@lemmy.world · 2 pts · 39d

Assuming he's just asking for personal donations

MojoMcJojo@lemmy.world · 1 pts · 39d

When war gets declared, whole lot of HRT drugs are gonna start showing up in the barracks.

inclementimmigrant@lemmy.world · 0 pts · 39d (1 reply)

Honestly at this point I'm going to make a bet on poly market that Kegseth here will come out as gay given his obsession with manscaping, men's bodies, and now testosterone to keep men turgid.

Senseless@feddit.org · 2 pts · 39d

Wouldn't be the first right wing weirdo that's overcompensating or projecting.